PROLOGUE: Apologies and Visions

BOOM!

The explosion was so loud it left an imprint in my eardrums. My head continuously ringed as everything went silent for a brief moment. I felt my legs becoming weaker and weaker as I push past beyond my limit.

"Keep running! Don’t let his sacrifice be in vain!" A man ahead of us was out of breath as he led the way towards a portal. Everything in my body hurts like hell. My lungs, heart, every joint, and strand of muscle is riddled with pain. Tears ran down my cheeks and my nose is filled with accumulated snot that started to exit one of my nostrils touching my top lip. But I didn't stop moving. I kept running like my life depends on it. Actually, my life does depend on it. If I stop now, I will die. I have no time to think about anything else. I don't want to die.

"Watch out!" I heard someone shout behind me but I didn't bother to look since it'll only slow me down.

STAB!

"Argh!" I hear someone cry in pain that prompted me to look at the source. A part of me wishes I didn't. A spear entered his back and went out the center of his chest. We both locked eyes as I see him take his last breath before turning into dust. A girl behind him screamed in shock. I noticed another spear from coming from a distance.

"Watch out!" I ran for her but the moment she swings her head around, it was too late. The spear went right through her right temple and exited the left. Pieces of flesh and probably her brain flew towards my way sticking to my cheeks. A couple of seconds after, she turned into dust floating away with the wind. I feel someone grab my arm and yank me back. When I turned, I see the man leading us looking right at me. He releases his grip and continued advancing towards the portal while giving me a scoff as if I did something wrong.

"Run!" He went on a full sprint and the minute I took the first step, I felt something nick my ear making me wince in pain and almost stumbling down. I heard sounds passing me not only once, but a couple of times making me duck my head thinking a spear is coming for me. My ear stings as if I was cut by paper and the minute I touch it, I felt something warm trickling down my cheeks.

B-blood? My voice disappeared from the shock as I stared at my hands covered with red liquid. I began running without looking ahead and I suddenly stumbled into something making me eat the floor. But somehow, rather than landing on the cold hard ground, something became my cushion. I look down and I was covered in red.

"W-w-wha-AHH!" I tried running away as I see a piece of his flesh scattered around the ground. Is as if, he was cut into cubes and brought into one pile. I got away from his mutilated corpse and as soon as I did, it turned into dust. I hear another scream from a distance and as I turn my head, I see one of my teammate's arms brutally ripped from the elbow by a wolf.

"It hurts! It hurts!!!!" He kept shouting as he falls to the ground. The loud noises he's making brought in more attention from the pack of wolves and next thing I know, they all pounced on him. They didn't stop devouring him until he turned into dust.

"N-no…No!! I don’t want to die!!!" I was frantic watching everyone die one by one. I tried sprinting towards the portal and different thoughts came in my mind crying my hearts out.

Why did it end like this?! Why?! There's nothing I can do...I'm weak. I'm so damn fucking weak! I cursed myself for picking the wrong class. Without a moment’s notice, something hits me from behind with such great force that I stumbled forward involuntary kissing the ground with my face. I held my nose to try and stop the blood from pouring out. I look like a mess. Tears won't stop coming out and I'm shaking uncontrollably.

I used my right hand to push myself up and as I check what crashed into me. "Wh-wh- y-you. H-how-" I see him lying there. Our leader. His body didn't look right at all. It seemed as if a giant grabbed him and squeezed him like a lemon. Blood was dripping out of his mouth and practically anywhere his blood can exit out of his body, it did. His eyes are similar to a dead fish but for some reason, his gaze was aimed at me.

"H-hey-" I tried touching him, but his body quickly turned into dust before I was able to shake him. A sudden swoosh came to my left and I felt something push my leg. As I look, I see a spear pierced my left thigh and exited out the other side.

"Ahhhhhhrghhhhhh!" The pain was intense as it suddenly sprung up from my leg traveling throughout my whole body. I tried to pull out the spear but it had a stopper that prevents me from pulling it out unless I want to rip my leg to shreds. I felt something hit my hand and in an instant, it went numb as my body started tilting sideways.

Thud!

I fell on my side as I lost my balance. I looked and noticed my arm was gone and like my leg, a sudden jolt of pain erupted from my arm traveling through my whole body. The pain was so much I almost lost consciousness. My leg felt like shattered bones inside puncture my flesh in all direction. I felt every inch of my body shake violently and cold sweats have slowly crept its way out of my skin. All I can do is scream on the floor to mask the pain by ripping my throat with my voice.

"Somebody help me!!” I shouted as hard as I can but no one will ever hear my cries. I'm the last one alive.

Fuck! I don't even know anymore! Why the fuck I'm here?! What the fuck did I do so wrong to deserve this?! I continue to rip my mind apart with different thoughts not noticing that my life is flashing before my eyes. I look at a distance and finally, I saw my end.

It's an ogre. Not just any damn ogre, he looks like the dungeon boss and he's looking straight at me running and screaming some dialect I can't even understand. Buckets of saliva are spewing out of his mouth like a rabid animal. Howls began towards my right and I don't even have to glance to know those wolves are coming to rip me with their teeth’s. I tried to think of a possible way out but I ran out of options.

I'm going to die. My sobs replaced my voice and I couldn’t accept it. I knew my death is just moments away as my body weakens and I lay on my back feeling helpless and alone not being able to do anything.

"I'm going to die," My voice feels weaken as I felt tired to even keep my eyes open. "I'm going to die. I'm really going to die. Somebody, save me."

I should have never stopped. I should have kept running. But I didn't want to leave without them. I didn't want to abandon them. I knew they would do the same for me. They won't abandon me. So I won't abandon them.

Trying to breathe through my nose is difficult since it's broken. My sides don't feel any better.

"Fuck," I say with difficulty. My mind breaks and I just want to wake up from this bad dream. "Fuck..."

My conscious starts to fade as the very last energy I have begun to exit my body. I stared at the roof of the cave and my body felt numb. The only sensation left is the feeling of the tears running down across my cheeks. I can feel the ogres footsteps, hear the wolves, the spear, the blades ringing I hear everything in all direction.

You're going to die you know. Just accepted it. Stop struggling. A voice that's mine but I don't feel like it is. It keeps repeating in my mind. But for some reason, everything seems to calm down and in a split second, everything was in slow motion. Ah, I guess they're giving me time to say my last words.

I tried to say something but my lungs getting filled with my blood just make me cough non-stop. I can't even say my last words properly as I struggle to breathe. I close my eyes and tears drip towards the side of my face. My life, the images of my childhood, my dad, my friends, my room, my school, even the people I didn't have a close connection with flashed before me. But what really stayed in my mind is the smile my mom gives me every time she enters the door coming home from working so late. With the last remaining strength I have, I used it to smile back.

Inhale*

Exhale*

"I'm sorry, Mom," I whisper as I made the biggest smile I can muster. "I'm sorry."

*The past*

Every day, life moved along even if we liked it or not. The world will spin even if we like it or not. Which motivates us to continue thriving for our best? One answer, our dreams. A fictional reality we created in our conscience. Something we all want to achieve. Something we all want to be in. But dreams have a very thin line separating itself from a nightmare. What we strive to be or be in might turn out what we don't want. But dreams, it's needed for people to continue moving forward and feel the sensation of being alive.

I was born around the 26th of March. I think every newborn is an ugly thing to look at. Covered in blood, that's not a pretty sight at all. But for some odd reason, they like ugly newborns even if they're covered in blood. Talking in an annoying tone as if it sounds like they have the wrong voice box installed and have it programmed to the highest annoying pitch while smiling and saying words nobody could fully understand.

Growing up was pretty easy at first. Just follow what they say and I get a compliment. Do the opposite and they scold me. So I just did everything I was told to avoid the corner of the room. But what's unavoidable and very hard to not see is the planet floating in the sky like a newborn sun. Even though it looks really close, it's far away from our reach. The planet in the sky is a carbon copy of the earth in my opinion. The only difference is, it's more colorful compared to pictures I see of my world. Scientist tried to study the new planet that emerged out of thin air but couldn't find a reason why it exists and its purpose.

For a couple of months, it was the top searched item on the web. News covered the planet almost every day. It was observed every day to see if there are any signs of life. But as the time progress, the people's interest faded. Now, the floating planet in the sky has become a part of life. Since they can't figure it out, it's either we accept it or reject it. It's not like anyone can make the planet vanish, so, people decided to accept it bit by bit until its value is the same as the moon. Just another thing we can gaze at.

It wasn't long until I started to understand the basic knowledge of the conversation. But it's mostly me listening to people talk while I nod my head in agreement. My parents read me stories about the floating planet in the sky. The folklores, theories, and assumptions have flooded my mind as a kid with an infinite imagination. I also heard it's a mirror effect. How we all have a doppelgänger within the other planet. All of these, I believed at first. Well, until I figured out later on that it was all a hoax. It's like being told Santa Clause was real all your life until some asshole comes in and crush your dreams boasting that Santa is just a figment of the adult's imagination for little kids to stay proper.

"Accept reality." That's what I overheard most adult around me said to each other.

"Kid, no one can reach it." Strangers crushing my imagination but, nonetheless, the stories my parents told me were very interesting.

"That planet is there but we can't even reach it. Not Even NASA." My dad says as he walks towards the door and sits on the floor to tie his shoes. I'm sitting on the living room floor playing with my toys. Mom is in the kitchen making me breakfast.

"They tried to send probes to investigate it but it vanished. Since it's a waste of money to build something that cost millions for it to just disappear, they stopped doing that all together." My mom replied back engaging a brief conversation while beating the eggs.

"Hmmm, but I still wonder what's on that planet. Well, let's continue this conversation later. Honey, I'm off to work now~" My dad stood by the door waiting for my mother.

"Take care~" My mother replied back while hurrying to give him a kiss before he stepped out the door. And that was the last conversation they had together. Later that day, we saw his name on TV as part of the headline news. He worked at a construction site and one of the cranes fell on a couple of people. Including him. They all died on impact. I remember my mom hugging me tightly and crying non-stop.

After my father's death, she continued to take care of me all by herself. Worked three jobs to just pay all of our bills and debts. She became my father and my mother. We did get money from the company where my father worked but it wasn't much. The owner of the company is the son of a powerful government official so basically, he got away from the incident paying little money as possible. They made it seems like it was the fault of the crane operator and even managed to blame everyone who died including my father. Saying that they were drinking on the job. That's bullshit. As far as I can remember, my father is allergic to alcohol. This shows how power, is everything and can even break the very facts and alter events to their liking.

What they didn't know is that my father was the breadwinner of the family. Without him, surviving became very hard. Even though I was young at that time, I still remember it clearly. That was the beginning of our hardships. We got kicked out of our apartment since we couldn't afford a two bedroom. Heck, we couldn't afford anything at all. My parent took out loans to get that place and now my mother is paying it all by herself along with other expenses such as food and sanitary necessities. We sold all of our possession to get rid of our debt but it wasn't enough to cover our needs. I wanted to help but there are very limited options a seven-year-old kid can do. At times, we slept at the park during the night or we would go to a spa and sleep there. This became our daily routine.

When my dad was alive, mom wanted to become a housewife so she never really had the intention to look for work. But now that she needs to, a lot of company turned her down due to lack of experience. But luckily she was hired and decided to look for more work to fit her 24-hour schedule. She would work at a restaurant in the morning serving customers and at night, she would be at a local bar serving drinks to her guests. After that, she would head over to a convenience store and work till dawn.

Working multiple jobs means there's no one to watch me so I would sit in a library in the morning and at night I would sit in the bar somewhere where I don't get in the way since the owner was nice enough to let my mother bring me to her work. After that, I would follow her to the convenience store and the manager there also let me wait in the employee room. I would wait in there and read the books I borrowed from the library. I don't know how my mother did it but she did. I guess the will to survive will always beat hardships.

Since I had nothing to do, I used my spare time to study. I didn't have the luxury to go to an elementary school since it cost money at that time. So, I did my best and self-studied. After my mother managed to save enough money to rent a small studio apartment, that's when I never left the house. With all the spare time I had, I became a bookworm. I studied and studied until my mother arrived home to sleep for 3 hours. I feel that we needed to share the same burden but since I was young at that time I couldn't work. So I only sleep when she gets home to sleep. This way, I felt like I was suffering with her and she wasn't doing it all alone. Even though my mother is tired, during her days off, she would ask me if I want to go to an amusement park.

"Yasu~ Want go to an amusement park?" She hugs me from the back as I sat near our window reading my a textbook about writing properly.

"No mom. I need to study." I reply back at her.

"Aw. You can study after! Come on let's go!" She tells me pulling my arm. My mom is adamant on going. But I was more set on staying home. Don't get me wrong, I'm still a kid. I want to go out and have fun. Eat food, play with other kids. But, more than anything, I wanted her to rest. It's the only day off she has and I want her to use it to rest. So I kept declining till my mother gave up. She was pouting at me the whole day but she became happy again when I helped her make dinner. I guess she just wants to spend quality time with her son.

I'm sorry mom. But I don't want you to leave me as dad did to both of us by overworking yourself. This is the best thing I can do for her.

I've always wanted to go to school and have managed to teach myself everything till I entered middle school. During middle school, I grew up thinking I need power. I read from books that knowledge is power so I studied like a madman. I didn't talk to my classmates or had friends. I went to school alone, ate lunch alone, studied alone all I did is study upon study upon study non-stop. When it comes to remembering things I'm average but my non-stop studying helped me ace a lot of tests. I did what I had to do and no one bothered me.

Bullying is something that will never disappear from any school. But I was never bullied. Even though I'm weak, no one seems to care about me enough to waste his or her time. Well, I couldn't care less about them in return. All I want is to gain as much as I can and advance my knowledge to gain the power to prevent any harm to my mom and myself. I want the power to give her a good life so she doesn't have to work too much. And the only way I know to achieve my goals is to study. Through middle school, I think my presence never existed in the first place. I got good grades but no one seems to notice except my mother.

Middle school years

I open a door and enter a small apartment. The kitchen, bedroom, living room, dining room, is all in one room. The only thing that's separate is the bathroom.

"I'm back," I remove my shoes near the doorway placing them neatly on the ground. Even though I know no one will answer, I'll always make it known I’m home. My mom is at work and doesn't get out until 3 am and currently right now it's 6 pm. As I approach the circular floor table in the middle of the room, I see a sticky note right on top of it.

Yasu, there is food in the fridge. Just heat it up. ^_^

- mom

*P.S. How's School?

I smile as I read the note. Even though she has no time for herself, she still does things like this that makes me feel loved. She gets home, sleeps for a couple of hours to go back out and work. I wake up early and make breakfast for both of us so she doesn’t have to worry about cooking for me. Once she wakes up, she'll eat the food I made regardless of what time it is and makes dinner for both of us while I'm at school. We do this routinely. I wanted to tell her she doesn't need to make me dinner so she can sleep in more but, I know she would get upset so I let her do it as long as she's happy. I place the note in a hidden box I stored behind the cabinet. Here is where I store all my valuables, which mainly consist of these notes and a diary.

"Got to pick her up from her work tonight," I quickly eat my dinner so I can start doing my homework and finish it early. My time in middle school was a breeze but a lonely one. Getting the top grades on everything made it easier for me to get offered from different high school to take a scholarship program. There are a couple of places I wanted to go to but two stood out the most. Both didn't offer me a scholarship so I had to take the entrance exam and achieve the top score to get a scholarship. I aimed for the second best school since it was closer to my home. I guess my years of non-stop studying have paid off and a lot of the questions have become simple to understand.

Upon passing the entrance exam with flying colors, the school gave me a scholarship as long as I maintain the placement within the top ten. But, I gave it away to someone else. It looks like she needed it more than I do. Or is it maybe because I fell for her at first sight? Either way, I was happy to help. After that, I aimed at the higher tier school that is on par with national institutes. I just went for it and took the test there. This one I need to be in the top three students to get a full scholarship. Luckily, I managed to land the first position and they gave me scholarship along with living expenses that I used to help my mother with our monthly bills. I told her it's the school's policy because if she knew that it's the pocket money they give me, I know for a fact she'll refuse to accept it.

*The present*

High school, it's another hurdle. I see it as a zoo catering to wild untamed animals. The way I view it, middle school, everyone is too focused on playing games. In high school, everyone is too focused on who they want to be with or fool around. I guess college is where people focus on who they want to be. But this is stupid in my opinion. Why not focus on who you want to be at an early stage? This way, a person can achieve it sooner. But no, most of my classmates think of who's hot and who's not. It's currently lunch time and I sit in my chair looking out the window towards the floating planet in the sky. Many different questions enter my mind. Does anyone actually live there? I wonder what the aliens look like. Do they have a school there? I was too busy minding my own business that it took me a while to notice that someone was tapping me on the shoulder

"Hey, Yasu, you listenin'?" I hear Daikichi ramble non-stop about his dream girls. Daikichi is the only friend I have and the only person I talk to besides my mother and Kana.

"Mhm." I let out a sound without breaking off my gaze towards the planet.

"Dude, Stop starin’ at that planet, it isn’t going anywhere." Daikichi waves his hands in front of me and I just ignored it and continued to stare at the planet in the sky. He gave up and decided to clean up our table putting plastic wrappers in a bag.

I wonder if there are people there. Different scenarios in my mind caused me to daydream most of the time.

" As I was saying, Carla, the new exchange student is above hot category. Maaaaaaaan you know how hard it is to be put into that category?! She is really hot, only if she speaks fluent Japanese I will probably swoon her off her feet! I mean, she doesn't even have a boyfriend and none of the guys can approach her because she's so, hey Yasu, you listening?”

"Mhm." I kept my gaze up until the bell rang breaking my concentration.

"Ah crap, lunch is over. I'll see you later after school. We got to continue this convo. Later gator!" Daikichi holds up his fist waiting for me to pound it. After fist bumping, he runs out of the room and rushes to his class. A place full of classy wealthy kids that don't like to get dirty, and then there's Daikichi. Don’t get me wrong, he's probably wealthier than everyone but the way he acts, sometimes makes me think if he's lying. I take out my notebook as soon as the teacher enters the classroom.

"Did everyone have a nice lunch?" She asked all of us as she opens her notebook and starts writing on the board. Some people reply to her question while others started writing on their notebooks. As for me, somehow I was more drawn into the planet in the sky.

As the lessons start, I continue to stare out the window. For some reason today, I can't seem to break my gaze of the carbon copy of the earth. I wanted to take it easy from all this studying and just relax. Just for a day. As I kept watching the planet, somehow, my vision is starting to fade. I quickly rub my eyes but it kept fading and fading up until I was bombarded with a quick flash of still images as if someone’s life was flashing before my eyes. Pictures I don't know about or for the matter if it exists in this world keep appearing. It took a couple of seconds and after the images disappeared, my eyes felt like it was being burned from the inside.

"Aggrrrrrrhhhhhhhhh!" I fell to the ground in pain as my vision disappears. It feels like someone shoved a hot metal and held it in place burning my eyeballs. I hear people scream around me as I felt hands trying to see if I’m okay.

"Yasu! What's going on?! Are you okay?!" Somebody is asking me over and over if I'm all right but somehow his voice sound muffled. "Someone! Call a teacher! Call the principal! Call someone!!"

I'm on the floor looking like a fish thrown into land flapping in and out. I convulse from the pain while I'm on the ground holding my eyes. A new after image started appearing, but this time it has words in it. I don’t know if this is real but I know what I have seen. The words 'Your time has come' stayed in my mind until I lost consciousness.