The problem with passing out drunk, besides the risk of getting sexually assaulted, is that tomorrow mixes with yesterday. Even if the booze doesn't give you a hangover, it messes up your memories. Thankfully Nephew has to keep me virgin for the altar, not that I have any intention of participating, but he won't touch me or let anyone here do that.

That was my first thought as I regained consciousness in the morning.

But I was careless as heck, wasn't I? I could smell the citrus-scented soap we made on my skin so I knew someone bathed me when I arrived. The fabric was rougher than my satin pajamas but still softer than the crap people wear and a quick glance down revealed it was one of Cloe's dresses.

*KEEEEEE!*

Dime chirped on the windowsill and I rose to look. He was bloody and caked in grime. I'm calling meat-and-viscera bits grime, okay? So, I knew I had to clean him up again.

"To the perch, Bloodstone. I'm going to clean you up," I told him.

He flew inside and I shut the window. The light filtering through the cracks in the shutters wasn't enough so I lit up one of my goblin-eye-lamps and undressed entirely. Since I was using Decompose to clean Dime, it was better to avoid damaging my clothes. I checked the bird for any signs of damage, plucked one or two old feathers that were dead and about to fall off to keep with the others I was collecting, and started to use my power to remove the grime and collect the elements. Once I reached the talons, I found bits of...

Human skin.

It was clearly human skin, I had no doubt about it. I could see the cracks and the hairs stubbing out from the ripped piece. It was less than a square centimeter in size but I felt my stomach rise and lurch inside me. Dime was fighting people. Killing people. I Decomposed everything, removing the water and bunching the carbon with everything else in a pellet that I tossed in the coal brazier. Then I did a thorough check to see if he had any wounds. I found none.

I couldn't believe Dime would be able to fight and kill this much without a scratch. But maybe... Our boons were shared. I knew Penny healed her lame leg that earned her a lazy horse reputation and that Dime regenerated from the wounds he received from the hunters when I bonded with him rather fast. Maybe he was regenerating the wounds and probably he also had my half-damage boon as well. Add that to the fact he had his own magic reserves plus what he could take from me through our bond and you get an apex predator from hell.

But a burning question remained. Who was the bird hunting, every single day? What faction? Nobody was complaining about a psycho bird in town and I bet either of the men I met yesterday would be glad to bring me down a peg by mentioning it if Dime was indeed attacking people from the city. So it was not that.

I recall I sensed him fighting around the Aerie, how I named the rock hill that looked like Devil's Throne in Wyoming. Were Marduk's troops stationed around that?

Dime nodded.

"Can you understand me?"

Dime nodded.

"No shit?"

He shook his head.

"Bloodstone, are you intelligent? Rational? Can you think?"

Nothing. Dime crowed and I felt he didn't understand me. Right. We could share feelings and ideas through our bond. That was the problem of my workaholic life. I had no time to spend with the people - and creatures - that were important to me.

"Were you fighting the bad guys of that invading army?" I visualized Prince Marduk's army. Dime nodded.

It couldn't be a coincidence. Marduk's troops were around the one geographical feature I cared about. Given that two gods chipped in to save him and what Nephew showed yesterday, it would come as no surprise that he had intelligence about me, the gods whispering in his ear. I needed to talk to Nanna, and fast. There were so many things I had to ask her I picked my phone and made a list.

Why isn't Tarhun's tablet working?

Is Marduk getting Intel from Nergal and Ereshkigal?

How small can the Ziggurat be?

Why is my fine control of Decompose so messed up lately?

Is there a time limit on Nephew's ziggurat survival plan?

Any way for me to regain magic faster? Like meditation or some other crap?

If Ishtar can talk to Nephew, Nergal to Marduk, why does Tarhun keep radio silence?

What other enchanted items can she make?

What deity did she worship when she was a priestess?

Should we pack up and leave Es-Kina for good? Leave these divine envoys to kill each other on their own?

From the top of my head, that was what I could come up with. I didn't expect her to have answers for all questions but I would be a fool to not ask. I petted Dime, summoned my carry-on and did my morning routine, then dressed up and donned my scratched armor. Then I picked up the bird on my falconry bracer and went outside.

As I moved down the corridors of Abil-Kisu's villa, I felt as if I was walking on eggshells. While I had no pretense that the city and the people wouldn't survive without me, I felt like I could do so much to improve their livelihood. Was I doing my best? I had no idea. I could only try. But the looming sense that dark forces conspired all around intensified. Now it was not petty officials or merchants trying to get profit beyond their just dues. The stage was one of the gods playing games. The kind where people died by the troves.

And how much different it was from what was happening right now? People were dying left and right, on both sides. And Nephew was intentionally keeping Brandon away from me. Jerks. All of us. I went out through the back door and reached the annex entrance. I wanted to eat fries for breakfast. Poisonous or not, I was salivating for some golden oil-soaked sticks of potato starch. I walked down the corridor and carefully opened the door to my storeroom next to Nanna's to avoid waking up the witch. I barged in and heard a scream.

Two half-naked female forms lurked on the ground among some furs. Out from one of the furs poked the heads of Gadudu and Kiya. I knew immediately what happened. They hadn't any rooms available for the two women so they used my storeroom. And I'd just walked in on them sleeping.

"Oh, I'm sorry to intrude!" I shouted and prepared to close the door.

Rubati quickly jumped on her feet, one hand keeping the furs from exposing her modesty. "Milady minister, please wait!"

Her plea using my rank stung. I froze there with the door half-closed, avoiding looking inside. I could feel the knot in my throat and my eyes stung. I was an outsider everywhere. A threat. What the captain barked at me was how the people saw me.

The Harbinger knocked down the moon from the sky, poisoned the land and killed countless people. I could not have the same powers as him but to the people of this world, it didn't matter. I was a force of destruction in their eyes.

A threat.

I swallowed the sob that wanted to get out. I couldn't cry right now. I turned around and ran back through the straight corridor and out in the morning sunlight. I had to get out of there. I had to go somewhere I couldn't hurt anyone. Back to the mines to lay with the dead, maybe.

I shouldn't have taken this job. I should gather my people and leave. There's a lot of undeveloped lands everywhere, we could go away and live our lives away from all this shit. Educate the children, raise the technology level, create a society more like...

Home.

I halted halfway through the backyard. That was stupid. I had nowhere to go. I couldn't just take people away with me and bleach their culture out to replace them with mine. I couldn't live alone like a hermit either. I needed people around. I had no choice but to keep going forward on the path I'd set myself on. See this circus burn down to the last ember. I looked up for an answer but I could only see faint wisps of clouds against the scattered blue light that covered the stars beyond.

I felt small. Insignificant. A canker that needed to be excised. As long as I existed, people would die around me. As long as I existed, the god's game would grind the world for their power plays. And Tarhun made it so that I couldn't even end my life easily. My legs gave and I fell down on my knees. Then my hips lost their strength and I sat on my ankles. My arms limped by my sides and Dime took off. I kept staring at the sky as if demanding an answer but the only thing that happened was that my eyes stung and the sky blurred, the stars beyond where home lied as unreachable as ever. The moisture trickled down my cheeks and I let it flow.

"Sandra!" A female voice called me. I didn't heed it.

The wind blew and my hair stuck to the tears. I felt motion around me but I paid no mind.

"Sandra!" Another female voice called my name. I paid it no mind.

Something blunt hit me, rattling the links of my mail underneath my shirt. It didn't hurt so I did nothing. Then again.

"Stop that! Why are you hitting her?" Belle's voice chided someone.

"That stupid girl is wallowing in self-pity. She's wearing armor, tapping her with this stick won't hurt her and even if it did, Tarhun made her out of tough stuff. Get yourself together, girl. This is not the time for shutting yourself in and the world out!"

Nanna's stick hit me twice more, with increasing strength.

"Stop that!" Kiya's extremely sharp and cute voice rang and the whooshing of the stick stopped before it hit me. Then her small arms embraced me and she put her face right in front of mine. "Sandra, we are sorry! Mommy was tired from the road and had nowhere to sleep! If we knew you'd be so upset that we took your room we'd sleep in the stables!"

She was crying as well, snot dripping from her nose. Kiya's small arms squeezed my neck and she rubbed her cheek on mine. I was such a fool. My arms moved on their own and hugged the tiny girl.

"No. I'm not angry that you used that room. I'd rather have you sleep on my bed with your mommy than lay down on the filth. Don't cry, I'm okay."

"You are not angry that mommy took your furs?" She asked.

"No. Keep them if you want. I was the one that called them back, why would I be angry at them? Whatever happened between us is past. You and your siblings are now my kin and that makes your mommy my kin too."

The girl's candid smile and tenderness washed away my worries. Nanna snickered.

"See?" She nudged Rubati with an elbow. "Is that woman splayed on the ground the fearsome Harbinger you talked about? The one you heard about in the capital?"

The witch cackled. I got a bit angry at her but I needed her help and I was the one making a fool of myself. I tentatively laughed but a sob-hiccup spasm slipped halfway through. Then I laughed for real. Tiny Kiya beamed on my lap.

"Banunu, Rubati, welcome back. I'm happy to see you two in good health!" I told them from the bottom of my heart.

I went through so much that Banunu's attempt at poisoning me felt like a teenage prank. And in her mind, I was about to destroy her whole family so I can kind of understand why she did it. I'm not a mother but I feel that I could raze a city to protect my children. I ruffled Kiya's ebony hair and gently pushed her off of me. I met Banunu's eyes and she blinked some tears away.

"We can't thank you enough for taking such good care of our children, milady," She replied.

"All of them spoke highly of you," Rubati added. "We are forever in your debt, milady."

I smiled and they reciprocated. Kiya hugged her mother's skirt. Both mothers were somehow disheveled. They dressed up in a hurry to chase after me. I almost wished I could stay on the ground forever, making a fool of myself. Maybe if I posed as harmless, people wouldn't come after me that much.

Who was I kidding? In this savage society where Lextalionis rules supreme, a harmless woman is a toy to be seized, used, and discarded. If I showed a weak and harmless side, I'd be married to Marduk now.

"I'm glad you feel that way and I intend to honor that feeling. However, I expect we can look at each other as equals here. I don't know what you two will want to do but you have my support. Now, could someone help me get back on my feet?"

"I'll do that!" Arwia came from behind Belle and as the cook parted I could see the throng of kids and preteens coming behind her. It seemed my antics woke up the whole household. "Grab the other arm, Belle-Sunu!"

The two girls heaved me up. My legs still felt as weak as a newborn doe's, probably from sitting seiza without proper preparation. I skipped a bit to pump some blood up and down my legs and felt the characteristic tingling.

"So. I'm sorry I wasn't here to welcome you back, I was forced into an audience with the Enshi and he kinda trapped me. Terrible evening, worst company."

"You shouldn't speak like that of the ruler of the city, milady," Banunu warned with concern in her voice. "It might be considered treason."

She glanced down at the children before resuming eye contact. I nodded. We'd talk about that later, just between us adults.

"You knew him well, didn't you, Banunu?"

"Yes, he was very close to our late husband," She sighed and Rubati held her hand. "I think it was him that got husband interested in 'foreign business'."

I could almost see her wiggling her fingers in the air quotes. We both understood that 'foreign business' meant the bribe Prince Marduk paid them to capture me. I grabbed Banunu's other hand.

"Well, come on, everyone. I'm starving and I am sure everyone could eat some breakfast. I'm thinking of making something new. Let's go."

"There's one thing we wanted to tell you," Banunu cautiously broached some important subject.

I stopped pulling and turned to give her my undivided attention. "Yes? What is it?" I asked with a smile to make her feel at ease.

"Rubati and I, we have no idea how we can thank you for taking care of our children. We want to repay it but I know you don't care about gold."

I chuckled. "I have too much gold. Not giving any away though. And the kids, they are lovely. After they warmed up to me, we had a wonderful time. It was no bother to look after them and to be honest, it was mostly Arwia's doing."

Rubati shook her head. "No. Your servant was doing your bidding."

"Employee at most," I corrected her. "Arwia is not my servant. But I can take some credit, can't I?"

"Our wish," Banunu said, "is to help you. Repay your kindness. Would you let us become your... employees as well?"

"That would be wonderful. I don't want you serving me though. You can live with me just like Nanna. I won't boss you around but I'd love to have your company. And we won't have to separate the children."

"But--"

Banunu was about to protest but the cheer from the brat crowd drowned her voice. I just smiled and pulled her along. At the kitchen, I made starch porridge with kefir for everyone. We hadn't vanilla but I used essence to make tangerine-flavored porridge. The thing was sweet but I committed a terrible mistake.

I underestimated the sweet tooth of children and what sugar did to their metabolisms. You see, they had little contact with sugar. They just didn't sweeten their food. Now add the thrill of a new experience with the raw glucose caressing their tongues and you have the recipe for chaos.

I cooked thirty bowls of porridge thinking it would be enough. The kids wolfed down, no, they inhaled the white goo faster than I could make more. Then they begged for more but Arwia and Banunu took them outside to burn the excess energy. I stayed in the kitchen with Belle, Rubati, and Nanna.

"What devilish concoction was that?" The witch asked. "It reminded me of the Askelian berserkers."

"Just sugar. It does that to children. Makes them livelier," I shrugged.

Rubati came and put a hand on my neck. "You are near your period, aren't you?" She asked with a low voice.

I perked up. I had no idea but my period was overdue. I mean, not late by any measure but I had no idea when it would come or even if.

"How can you tell?" I asked back.

"This woman has a very minor adept power. She can gauge the health of the person she touches," Nanna explained.

"It helps keep my children healthy," She blushed.

"Oh. I was worried about it since I spent most of the four months trapped in the underground unconscious," I confessed. "I mean, I woke up with some dried blood... there... so it must've happened but I had no idea when."

"Soon," Rubati said with a smile. "Do you have the napkins?"

I had panty liners but they were for everyday use, not for periods. "No. And I have no idea what you use in this world."

Rubati giggled. "I'll see that you are well-supplied. I'll visit the market today."

I blinked in confusion but I was feeling fuzzy inside. If there was one thing I was sorely needing, it would be validation. Was it selfish of me to bind all these people to me? maybe. I wasn't forcing them though.

"Cool. Let me fetch you some money."

"Let it be a gift from us," She suggested.

I nodded. "Fine then. I have to go to work soon but I wanted to ask Nanna a few things before. Being a super-important minister tasked with saving the town from starvation is hard, didn't you know?"

"Yes. Come to my room, super important minister," The witch snickered and left.

"Excuse me," I went after her.

We walked without a word to the annex and into Nanna's room. She crossed her arms and kept staring at me. Once the door was closed and I got used to the strong herbal smell, I spoke.

"It seems Nephew... The Enshi can talk to Ishtar. And that Prince Marduk, that was saved by Nergal can talk to his god too. Why can't I talk to Tarhun?"

She rolled her eyes and suddenly was she was someone ancient and wise. "The answer is as obvious as the sun rising for someone in a vigil that waits for the next day. What do they do that you don't?"

I was a fool to expect a straight answer. And the way she put it made me feel stupid. Is the sun reference a metaphor? Like the dawn of enlightenment? Oh. Enlightenment.

"They seek their deities' guidance," I replied.

Nanna didn't flinch or shift her facial expression. "What else?" She asked with a neutral tone.

The fact she didn't scold me meant I got it partially right. "They pray."

"Indeed. Have you prayed to Tarhun? Even though he gave you great power, you showed no piety. How is he going to talk to you if you don't talk to him or don't try to listen?"

That... made a lot of sense. "Is that the reason his tablet isn't working?"

"No, that's Ishtar being petty and running ahead of the horse," Nanna scoffed. "She spent a lot of energy and claimed the city before the ritual. If everything goes right she gets that energy back, if not, she loses."

That also meant she would fight to protect her investment. "Keeping the Enshi alive also uses energy, right?"

"The major expense was when she blessed him but as he is severely poisoned, she has to keep him from dying, so yes."

I check the list on my phone, "Is that why my power is out of control recently?"

"Probably. I have no way of telling for sure."

"Is there any way I can recover magic faster?"

She snorted. "No. There's a way for sorcerers near you recover magic faster because you saturate the air around you with your excess magic but for you? No. There are fewer mortals stronger than you I've seen than fingers in my hands. I see your confusion, let me explain.

"Can an oasis drain water from the desert sands around it? No. Most of the magic in the air around you came from you. You are the one to quench the wretched thirst of this world. Hum..."

She assumed a pensive pose, her eyes unfocusing and her gaze on the endless horizon. Then she smacked her lips and smiled at me.

"Let me tell you a little story, one I learned when I was young. You know the people of this world came from yours, right?"

I nod, "I recall Tarhun mentioning something about that."

"Yes, that was true. There was an age that your historians call the 'Bronze Age', where civilizations thrived in the middle-east. And so the gods these civilizations worshipped also thrived. They invented several things, built marvels that I know amaze your people even millennia after their crafting. Yet like all things, it was bound to end. It happened so that the gods of Hatti, Babylon, Akkad, Sumer, Assyria, Ur, and other empires were so engorged in the prosperity and worship of their people that they did not notice the other peoples and their own gods envy at what we had.

"And these other deities came and took a piece of land here, a bit of power there, a prominent person or two. And in their high ziggurats, the gods did not act until too late. First, a creation god did a covenant with one man from Ur. He would be the patriarch of a new civilization, you know of whom I speak. Say not his name or mention that creation god. That man was strongest in both spirit and soul. His seed grew and for the first time, the gods took notice of the envy around them."

"Oh, are you talking about Ab--"

"NO NAMES!" Nanna Interrupted me with a baffling amount of pressure. It was as if I was a little girl with a roaring tiger right at my face. "Names have power, girl! Tarhun almost had a fit and destroyed this section of the continent when you threatened him with foreign scriptures. Names have power, don't speak of them. Not of this patriarch, not of the deity that took him. It is a bitter moment for most gods here. We will talk about it later, but keep that in mind. Don't say one's name unless you wish to grant one's power."

I nodded. "Sorry. My bad. I will take care. So, that man, did he cause envy?"

She cleared her throat and continued. "They manipulated to bring misery to the people of that patriarch but that only made them stronger. And then the savages of the inner sea attacked. Trade with other regions stopped and suddenly the wealth that was circulating stagnated. As if a brick from the bottom of the tower was removed, so these civilizations collapsed."

History was never my strong subject but I remember the Bronze Age Collapse. When the civilizations that lived in what is today Turkey, Iraq, and Iran basically vanished in less than a century. The trade of tin from faraway lands was vital to their bronze industry and so were several goods from other regions as far away as China. Or India. I don't recall very well. The waning trade coupled with climate changes that hindered their agriculture put them in a pinch but when the Sea Peoples invaded the Mediterranean, it was the last drop.

There is a lot of controversy and speculation regarding that so the true reasons are not known... But what Nanna said...

"And the gods decided to emigrate to another world," I concluded out loud. "They brought their people here, to start anew!"

"Yes, girl. The Greeks, Egyptians, and the ones to the East decided to stay behind and try their luck. The Hittite, Mesopotamian, and part of the Elam gods decided to migrate. We brought seventy-seven million people here."

"We?" I ask, startled.

"Don't interrupt me as I recite the scriptures, girl. It was written from the gods' point of view!" She scolds me.

That makes sense. "I'm sorry," I try to placate the angry witch.

Indeed it felt like the people just vanished. So they literally vanished. I can only imagine how much power it took to transport that many people from one world to another.

"A lot of power was used," Nanna continued as if she could read my mind, "almost all the power the gods had. Some of them with similar domains merged to survive. But not much power was left to seed the world with magic."

"Is that why I'm here? To be an oasis in the desert? To keep leaking magic until the world saturates?"

She did a half-smile, half-scowl. "I do not dare know what is in Tarhun's mind but that might be the case," She said without much respect for the curly-bearded god. Thinking back to how she said, it was kinda patronizing. "I can see you have more questions in your shiny glass thing," She said with a tired voice, "But remembering that was tiresome. Begone, girl. You have a city to save."

I knew better than to linger around in Nanna's place longer than I needed or past my welcome. I made the phone vanish and stood up. "Thank you for your lessons, Nanna. If there's anything I can do for you, just ask."

I was going away but I heard her grumble, "Just wait, girl. I know exactly what I need you to do."

I felt a shiver running up my spine. It was as if I'd made a pact with some ancient dragon. The kind where the mortal always got the short stick. But that might be my hormone-fueled paranoia speaking. If I was close to my period... well, everyone knows what it means.

I left the annex and made a beeline for the stables. I didn't ask all I wanted from Nanna but I got more than I expected so it was fine. The sugar rush was still on and the children were tramping the grass and making a ruckus on the backyard. I lowered my head and mounted Penny. I knew I wouldn't leave if I went to spend time with them and I had some special guests today.

I was rather late, already.