CHAPTER 488

FIREFLY

Lino stormed into the topmost chamber of the fortress, his expression one of annoyance, right eye edging toward darkness. The chamber was empty, he quickly noted. He was alone -- something he appreciated. Slumping onto the chair, he whipped out a bottle of ale and began sipping it in wild abandon, trails forming at the corners of lips, dripping down. Frustration was evident in every one of his movements, his muscles flexed unnecessarily with every action.

“You don’t have to take it to heart,” Ataxia’s voice broke out as a swirl of smoke appeared in front of Lino. He’d started projecting into reality more often, Lino noted silently. “It is just who One is.”

“Damn him to hell,” Lino cursed. “If you’d told me the exact backlash over killing him rather than being vague, I would have done all in my power to curb the cocksucker.”

“He annoys you, yet your goals align. Why? Because his approach is different?”

“Because he’s a megalomaniac,” Lino shrugged, taking out another bottle, this time of orange-dyed wine. “Unity... bah, unity my ass. He wants the world to bend to his reign under the pretense of unification. Ass, just like the rest of ‘em.”

“... is it so hard to believe that his goals might be noble?” Ataxia probed.

“If they’d been noble, he wouldn’t be skittering about while the world caved into madness,” Lino said. “He’s part of the order that brought the world to its knees, Ataxia. I don’t care for his justifications. He simply let it be.”

“So have I. Do you blame me too?”

“I do.” Lino nodded.

“... you seem to be throwing blame around at everyone these days.” Ataxia nodded, his robotic voice settling somewhat. “You didn’t use to be like that.”

“... you know I have,” Lino chuckled strangely. “I was just too weak to voice it. It’s tiring, jumping around like a rabbit, trying to fix everything you idiots fucked up.”

“Are you fixing it, though?”

“Of course not,” frustration and anger returned to Lino’s voice. “Instead, I’m forced to engage empty bouts with vain dicksuckers with nothing better to do. Instead, I’m forced to compel the Origin War, driving millions into unavoidable caprice, death, and fight the battles of no meaning. It amazed me, since the day I stepped on this path, the sheer stupidity of people who’ve lived for eons.”

“... to me,” Ataxia said. “It simply looks like you’re unwilling to conform. You object their way without trying to embrace it, for however little.”

“... it’s enough, Ataxia,” Lino sighed tiredly. “Soon enough, all of this will be over. You will have your victory. You can then conduct yourself to whatever next vile, the-end-justifies-the-means tale you wish. I will never conform because I’ve embraced it. Haven’t I? If I hadn’t, I’d have refused her Origin War. I would have refused to play their games, to entertain their ideals. Instead, I would have fought to protect the few that I love and been done with it. I am in this mess because I embraced it. Against my heart and my mind.”

Ataxia withdrew soon after, the puff of smoke disappearing, leaving Lino alone once more, a cloud of gray hovering above his mind. That, however, didn’t last long, as the doors to the room cracked, a short, glistening figure perched her head through with curiosity. The moment she saw him, her lips parted into a brilliant smile, her eyes shining, as she sprinted over, her beautiful hair billowing back in concert with her white dress.

"Dad!!" she jumped into his lap, startling him slightly as he raced to catch her so she didn't fall over. Right then, at that moment, all his worries vanished; there was no gray cloud, there were no frustrations, no anger. Just peace. "You're back!!" Aaria pressed her head against his chest, tightly hugging him. "Eww," she withdrew immediately after, however, a look of disgust on her face. "You stink." she, however, remained sitting on his lap.

"Ha ha ha, sorry firefly," Lino chuckled, ruffling his fingers through her hair. The little girl seemed content with it, her expression mellowing. "Had I known you'd surprise me, I would have bathed first."

“Right,” Aaria rolled her eyes, clearly not believing him. “Anyway, tell me. How was it?! Did you win?! Did you really explode the entire planet on your own?! Gosh, that sounds so cool! Could you tell me in detail so I can paint it properly? What did it feel like? What was Ashtar like? Was he really, really ugly? Super intimidating and strong? Did he almost kill you but then you find that last bout of strength to push him back and achieve victory, inspired by all your friends you were protecting? Did you--” the little girl rattled on, causing Lino to squint slightly. Ah, something seemed to click in his mind. This is why everyone looks like they want to commit both suicide and homicide when I rattle on during one of my bouts...

“Calm down, firefly,” Lino smiled, interrupting her for a moment. “You asked plenty, yet you somehow missed the most important thing. It kind of hurt me, you know.”

“... you can’t ever be hurt, dad,” Aaria said with confidence, surprising Lino. “You... you are just like those heroes from the stories. Impervious.”

“Ho, big words. Where’d you learn that one?”

“... in the books?” she looked at him dubiously. “Ah, right. I forgot. You never read.”

“Oi!”

“It is fine -- not everyone can be gifted in the intellectual ways. You are good at fighting, mom’s good at fighting and thinking. She might really leave you if you keep this up...”

“...” corners of Lino’s lips twitched, causing Aaria to leap off his lap.

“You’re not going to turn into a world-devouring beast and eat me, right?! That would be horrible!” the little girl exclaimed in an exaggerated tone, though hardly managing to hide her mischievous smile.

“... do you think, firefly,” Lino asked all of a sudden, his voice turning somewhat serious, surprising the girl. “That your dad is a stubborn, ol’ oak?”

"..." Aaria inspected him for a moment, her eyes glistening in a strange light.

“No,” she shook her head. “Why?”

“... I... don’t know,” he sighed, leaning back into his chair, taking a sip of wine; it was somewhat bitter, yet sweet once it streamed down his throat. “Just a feeling... that’s how others might see me.”

“...” the girl walked over slowly, climbing back up onto his lap, leaning her head against his chest once more, seemingly no longer infected by his stench. “You listen to everyone. You change what they find troubling. If anything, I think... we are stubborn. We know that being stubborn will make you give in. Just like that time I asked you to ride Vy.”

“...” Lino chuckled inwardly, glancing down, gently caressing Aaria’s hair. “You really are a little minx. Know how to play me. Just like your mom.”

“Uh nuh,” she shook her head. “I... I think... you just let us. Because you love us.”

“... I really do love you.”

“We love you too, you know?”

“I know,” he nodded, smiling. “It’s what keeps me goin’, firefly.”

“...” Aaria shuffled in his embrace slightly, pressing even tightly. She hadn’t seen her dad like this before; in her eyes, he was always confident, calm, all-knowing, ready with an answer to every problem. A true Emperor, bearing the weight of millions on his shoulders. “I’ll grow up soon,” she said. “And I’ll help you. With anything. I promise.”

“... pfft, ha ha ha ha,” Lino burst out into laughter all of a sudden, one free of constraints, full and deep. “Really? Oh my, what will I do then? You’ll solve all of my problems in a day.”

“...” Aaria pouted, her cheeks flushed in red, as she angrily glanced at him. “You’re mocking me!”

“... I am,” Lino grinned, staring down at her. “I don’t need you to hurry with growin’ up, kiddo. You help me plenty already. Live your life, firefly. Love and be loved. Teach and be taught. Play to your heart’s content. Your dad’s fine.”

“... this is what mom meant when she said you can be really selfish sometimes.” Aaria mumbled lowly, lying back down.

“I imagine she did.” Lino said.

“Do you refuse her help too?”

“... I do,” he nodded honestly. “Though I do get an earful because of it.”

“Why? Mom’s also really strong. I’ve seen it.” Aaria asked.

“Oh, I know she is,” Lino said. “More than anyone in the world can possibly imagine. But... it’s not about the strength, firefly. Even if you, or your mom, were a hundred times stronger than me, I’d still be the same. Your mom’s right. It’s my selfishness.”

“... I change my mind. You are stubborn.” Aaria puffed angrily.

“Ha ha ha, yeah, I suppose I am,” he said, leaning down and kissing her head tenderly. “I’m sorry firefly. But, I didn’t lie, you know? You really do help me plenty. As does your mom. Without you two... none of this would seem worthwhile.”

“Hm? What about the others?” Aaria asked. “Aunt Lucky and Ella, and Uncle Eggor and others? The army? The Empire itself?”

"... I hold them all dear," he said, looking out the window into the open horizon, where the world curved from the fortress' high, showcasing the city beneath. "And would fight for them to my last breath. But... I'd never die for them, firefly. I couldn't. Not with you and your mom still around. I know you might think I'm horrible for it," he added, glancing down at the stumped Aaria. "But, in my heart of hearts, I know I'd rather watch the entire Empyrion crumble into ash than see anything happen to you or your mom. That's how you help me," he smiled faintly, grabbing the back of her head, pulling her closer against his chest. "Firefly. You give me wings, and let me soar."