Party balance check: Rainwoman is our main DPS, Sorry Man is our golem tank, Mirim is our long-range sniper, Kimono is our backstabber melee assassin, Crys is our strategist plus crowd control with his poison gas attacks, Dancer is our area-of-effect nuker and the twins will be our scout-scrappers. And I'm a... buffer-debuffer? Resource master? Sickly wizard?

Anyway, we can deal damage and take damage effectively on all ranges... but we can't heal damage.

And that's a problem.

Mu-Ur Quincunx wasn't a multiplayer game, so party management on this level wasn't needed, but when you thought about the anime, the weakest link of the core group was clear: they didn't have a healer.

Damage accumulated over time and everything rolled downhill from there.

There were no magical healers in this world, so we needed something like a combat medic, but considering the general level of medical treatment in this world that was in the general ballpark of screw tourniquet, hot water opium and amputation, it didn't help much either.

Honey glue as disinfectant-adhesive was a luxury, but we had some of that at least.

In the game, characters healed to their current max level automatically during full rest, or between levels behind the scenes. Mu-Ur didn't have medpacks to collect inside the levels, just different battle drugs that offered momentary boosts in exchange for permanent stat damage.

For a speedrunner, this system was a double-edged sword: you had to find a balance between short-term speed boosts and maintenance of long-term speed, but every new glitch that was found disturbed the balance of the full run and you had to take new boost timings into account by re-routing and micro-optimizing from the start.

This comprehensiveness was one of the reasons I personally found speedrunning Mu-Ur so interesting and engaging, but it was for the same reason why many other runners found Mu-Ur so frustrating. These reactions to micro-optimization difficulty were perfectly mirrored in the community jargon: those who liked the system called it Bladerunning, those who hated it called it Edging.

Then again, infectious diseases were surprisingly rare despite unhygienic conditions. One fan theory about the rarity of diseases in Mu-Ur was that when Strangers destroyed most of the animal life, harmful viruses and bacteria were destroyed as well.

I guess there's an equilibrium in extinction too.

Strangers, I will place my trust in your precise and comprehensive eradication of germs.

I was out for a few minutes.

...Fifteen minutes?

No, make it thirteen minutes or more.

When I came back to my senses, I was lying on my back on the floor of our horse coach, raincloak rolled under my head. The first face I saw was Kimono's.

“...Give it to me straight, doc, how long do I have to live? Is it 404 Not Found? Has the link rot finally reached my lungs?”

“Huh?” (Kimono)

“Aren't you going to ask me how many fingers do I have? No, that's not it; ask me how many I can see.”

“Brother, he's awake, but if he keeps speaking nonsense, I can't tell if his mind is right or not.” (Kimono)

“I'm still alive? I didn't reset?”

“It's just a flesh cut, Speedrun. A ricochet to your temple.” (Crys)

“It didn't went through your thick skull.” (Kimono)

“Eeh? Hey, hey, hold on, head injuries are serious business! Did you use alcohol and honey glue to seal the wound? Please don't tell me you cauterized with gunpowder.”

“I've treated wounds before.” (Kimono)

“Yes, but... head wound on this day and age...”

Okay, let's not start criticizing them right after successful mission. They did their best with what they have. I should just be happy to be alive.

I felt a dull ache in my forehead and my knees felt like jelly, but otherwise I was feeling quite chirpy. My trendy scarf was tied around my head like hachimaki.

“...Fuu. Thanks for saving my cheeks, Kim-chan. Did you carry me all the way?”

“Tch. Get a helmet.” (Kimono)

“Yes, thanks for reminding me, I should get that ballistic helmet. One of those metal pith helmets or whatever they were called... It would as least protect me from random debris, if not direct hits.”

“...Are you alright, big brother?” (Mirim)

Mirim was nibbling dried meat. The closest thing to meat Mirim was able to eat in Wineep was probably blood porridge. She's a growing girl, I need to make sure she eats healthy food from now on.

She was also holding hands with Rain. Aww, sisters were together again. They were both still covered in mud and dried blood, but none of that was their own blood, probably.

“I'm fine, Mirim-tan~. 'Tis but a scratch, said the knight of the turntables. Marathon luck, happens all the time. Does this Rambo look suit me? It's pretty eighties, isn't it?”

“...Y-yes...” (Mirim)

“You have no idea what I just said.”

“No...” (Mirim)

“It's fine, they don't understand me either. No one in this world understands me... hehe...”

“You should rest, Speedrun. You'll reopen the wound.” (Crys)

“It's not lethal, right?”

“No.” (Crys)

“Did you give something to, you know... wink wink, nudge nudge, say no more?”

“Yes.” (Crys)

“I see... Everything went as planned? Everyone cool?”

“Yes.” (Crys)

“Good, good. I guess I'll take a full rest then. Make it so, number two.”

Was it actually good to sleep after head trauma or was it better to stay awake? I wasn't up to date with latest brain injury treatment recommendations.

I laid back down on the floor and closed my eyes. I felt drowsy.

Before I went to sleep, I heard Dancer coughing on the reins. We were heading to colder areas after a long journey in warm weather.

...Wait, did I raise a flag by thinking about infectious diseases? No, that's just superstition, I don't believe in flags.

Zero flags were raised in the making of this inner monologue.

According to Crys' after action report later, the mission went as planned even without me. So that's great.

The crane claw lifted us out of the mine and lowered us down to a monorail cart. After that, they simply hiked back to our rally point in the south side, hopped in the coach and headed southeast towards Loönois moorlands.

They left some more dynamite under the monorail and claw crane to demotivate our pursuers.

I was still a bit worried about using dynamite so openly and so often, but even if Caliph Tze hears reports about these “strangely powerful gunpowder explosions”, it shouldn't be enough to make him abandon his plans.

Rukhkh Egg is what matters to Caliph, everything else can be kicked down the road.

But still, destroying the monorail was a big improv move from Crys. It would certainly attract attention.

In the anime, Rainwoman and Mirim used the monorail to get from Wineep mine to Rukhkh Mountain when they headed to their first direct fight with Caliph Tze. For us, it was far too early to jump to the Rukhkh episode.

Caliph's moving palace had just reached the mountain and the twins were still with him.

We should lay low for now. Making big moves so close to Rukhkh might change the future too much.

I slept soundly when we crossed over to the Loönois territory.

After traveling around this small world in eighty days (give or take three or four months), we were back on the Ur Continent side.

I had built my character a bit on this journey. I had started as a weak underdog in a background wilderness and ended up becoming the exposition fairy of the strongest adventurer party.

I had single-handedly turned a cast of antiheroes in a crapsack world into a band of heroes in a world full of opportunities.

A real rags to riches over-arc.

When I woke up again, it was dark outside, but lanterns lighted the inside of the coach.

Mirim still held Rain's hand and talked about the time she escaped from the Bone Dune Station.

“...After the guard disappeared, a black-haired boy came and said he was my brother. We dived into a shadow and he carried me away in the darkness. It was warm and gentle darkness.”

Crys glanced at me and nodded. I nodded back, stayed still and kept my mouth shut.

That black-haired boy was definitely Shaper of Darkness. It was interesting to hear some fresh backstory from the main character herself.

“...When we came out of darkness, we were on a road, in a forest. People traveled on the road and we asked food from them, but they threw rocks at us and called us filthy. Brother made more darkness and we escaped again. We went to sleep in a barn, but in the morning the slavers on horses came and brother was already gone. I was taken down to the mine and forced to work. They called me Bug and said that a slave doesn't need a real name... Then you came, and he called me Mirim again, and I remembered you from the time we were in cages together...” (Mirim)

“I remember you from that time too. When they took us to Reignland.” (Rain)

Weather Girl and Death Machine. What a touching scene. Two main characters who were emotionally unstable and emotionally dead, respectively, were quite mellow this time.

All the main characters, except the twins, were finally together.

It was worth it to go through all that trouble just to witness this emotional reunion. We have the power of friendship on our side now!

Dancer sat next to Crys, so Kimono was sitting on the driver's seat again. It was raining and the coach swayed like a ship. The muddy moor roads tested the limits of both the horse and the undercarriage.

Mirim finally noticed that I was awake.

“Are you alright now, big brother?” (Mirim)

“I'm alright. Stat damage is permadamage, you just have to cope with it. No problemos.”

I got up and lurched down on the seat. I felt dizzy, but at least I didn't feel like vomiting.

Dancer wiped his eyes to a handkerchief. You cry too easily, dancing man.

“I was really worried about you, Speedy! We're already in Löonois, it would be sad if you couldn't see that mansion you want to see...” (Dancer)

“Thanks. Were already in Loönois, huh. That means... Next stop Starfish Mansion, yay! Say yay, Dancer!”

“Yay!” (Dancer)

“Mirim, were going to Disne– Starfishland!”

“...Big brother, what is that?” (Mirim)

“It's a magical place, with many doors leading to many places.”

“You don't need to understand, Mirim. This old uncle talks in riddles.” (Rain)

“Hey, Rain-chan, you should start calling me big bro too.”

“Pff, old uncle...” (Dancer)

“Hey, no laughing! Dancer is out~to, you'll get slapped with– Oh right, jokes aside. Crys, before we get to the Loönois moors, we should get rid of this coach and seize the opportunity to steal that vehicle we talked back at the Crumbling Shores.”

“Yes, I look forward to that.” (Crys)

It's a great feeling when your team gets more tight-knit after tense battles and aims for the same objective with great plan and teamwork.

“...Steal a vehicle?” (Rain)

“Yeah, we're entering Loönois, the old front line of the war between Caliph and Suleiman. That's why the supply line side roads here used by horse carriages are bad, and why we can move without getting noticed. When we get to the better roads that are maintained by Caliph's troops, we should change our horse coach to a car to – oh, car means Strangers mining vehicle, Mirim, for your information – get a car good enough for seven people. Well, six people because Rain always sits on Sorry Man's lap on the back seat.”

Rain had a complex expression on her face when I said that, but I continued.

“Anyway, getting a car will also greatly help us find the right spot near the Starfish Mansion, so it's useful like that as well.”

“...You don't know the location?” (Rain)

“I know the location of the mansion, but it's invisible to us at this point and the area might look a bit different in this timeline, so for safety, I expect it takes some wiggling to find the exact route in. That's why we should find a suitable vehicle now that were here before we enter the moors. That shouldn't be a problem, as there are many garrisons and outposts in nearby towns and villages.”

That's what I hope. Loönois was a very RNG-heavy area with many variations in garrison setups, military personnel, villager alignments and gang encounters.

We still hadn't seen any wanted posters for Rainwoman or Sorry Man, so if we keep a low profile, there shouldn't be the gameworld problems of going through towns where half the population is categorized as enemies instead of neutrals.

In general, these northern territories connecting Ur Continent to Wineep Isthmus were mostly ruled by crime lords, but Caliph Tze kept paying them enough that they didn't cause trouble for his soldiers stationed here.

In the past, Suleiman was the one who ruled these areas, but when Caliph Tze pushed through the isthmus with new tactics and strategies based around knight squads and mining vehicles instead of cavalry charges and line infantry, Suleiman's armies had to retreat south until they learned to use the same methods, clung to their elastic defense advantage and turned the war into a trench hell.

“The side road that snakes near the Starfish Mansion is quite good, but it's meant for horse wagons, so getting a car with a similar height and width is better than going for a bigger vehicle. We don't want to leave wide tracks or rip low-hanging branches from trees. So we're looking for 1930s style six-seater – an autopalanquine, as Caliph's army calls them. Here's a picture of it, everyone take a look and whistle if you see one.”

The sketch I had drawn in my notebook made a round from hand to hand.

In the first episode of the anime, the Starfish Mansion was found because the autopalanquine stopped working in a specific spot looking over a strip of forest and a small lake.

It was speculated to be some sort of interference from Starfish Mansion, but it wasn't exactly canonical reason, because there were no other Strangers vehicles stopped by mysterious forces in that place.

If Caliph Tze's soldiers driving autopalanquines on that road would have been stopped before, they would have certainly pushed their vehicles onward and noticed that their vehicles started working again outside the Radius Of Influence emitted by something uphill the northern side of the road. And they would have looked for a reason for the strange phenomenon and it would have been added to the Loönois Anomaly report.

But since that hadn't happened, the real reason for the vehicle dying there must be something else – like Sorry Man sitting in the vehicle, perhaps.

However, in the game the Radius Of Influence of the Starfish Mansion affected all Strangers vehicles. It wasn't clear if it was intended or a bug.

Now, the big speedrunning trick during the mission was to drive towards the ROI as fast as you could before swerving the car left, jumping out right before the edge of shutdown and run the last stretch to the door spawn point while dragging and kicking Sorry Man around like a puppet.

Since the last part of the mission in the game was to actually find the invisible door and the requirement for opening the door was Sorry Man, the fastest way too use Sorry Man was to just throw him against the door.

Rain won't be happy if I try to do that here, obviously.

But if Sorry Man doesn't open the door voluntarily, it might come down to throwing Sorry Man around the moors like a pole in a caber toss event.

We can only hope that Sorry Man cooperates. The run so far has gone fine enough that going for an alternate route at this point would require real sacrifices.

“I leave the actual plan of how to get the autopalanquine to you, Crys.”

“Sure.” (Crys)

When we stopped to take a break, Dancer helped me to change the bandage on my head and I checked the wound with a mirror.

A swelled gash of about five centimeters near the hairline on the right side. Pretty nasty. Pretty hardcore. Probably going to stay for a while. Should I grow emo style peek-a-bangs to hide it?

My first real battle scar.

Maybe I should actually be proud of it.

A few days later, on a quiet and misty forest road few kilometers away from the coast of Sea of Peace –

– a group of eight Caliph Tze's soldiers were packed in a mining vehicle driving east, when they were suddenly stopped by a large tree that had fallen over the road.

It wasn't anything out of ordinary; there were often landslides or fallen over snags blocking the roads at the coast of Loönois.

But immediately after stopping, the driver was killed by a bullet that went in his left ear and exited through his right ear.

The shot came from a nearby hill and hit the driver through a half-open observation slit on the side.

The panicked soldiers rolled out of the vehicle, readying their rifles, and took cover on the left side of the vehicle.

The first shot from the Vampire Rifle still echoed in the misty forest.

Mirim's ossicles had probably turned to crystals like her eye. She didn't flinch at the gunshots back in Wineep either.

Leaving the vehicle was a mistake from the soldiers part. Kimono appeared from behind the fallen tree, leaped at the top of the vehicle and continued to jump down in the middle of the soldiers, ripping them apart with claw knives.

Mirim could have shot all the soldiers herself, but we didn't want to damage the car or waste bullets. Driving a car full of bullet holes would have looked suspicious even in these neighborhoods.

Only two of the soldiers – the battle-hardened veterans guiding the young trainees – saw that they were ambushed by professionals and retreated down the hill to the forest...

...and there they encountered Sorry Man. He stood next to a tree like a statue.

Before the veterans could shoot this dark apparition before them, Rain shot both of them with her revolvers over Sorry Man's shoulders.

And that was it.

These three ladies working together gave me that warm, nostalgic, late night anime feeling I hadn't felt for a long time.

While the women did all the hard work, I watched the events unfold from a safe place further down the road with Crys and Dancer.

“Thank you for bringing us this wonderful vehicle, young men blinded by Caliph's propaganda. Your noble sacrifice won't be forgotten.”

I put my hands together for a mocking prayer when we walked up to the autopalanquine.

Crys had taken some time in the previous village to find out the regular movements of Caliph's troops and constructed a plan to intercept this newbie training mission.

And the plan had went exactly as expected. The trainees weren't able to put up any meaningful resistance.

“Dancer, what is best in life?”

“Dancing?” (Dancer)

“No! To crush your opponents, see them driven before you, and hear the protests of their fanboys!”

“I don't know what I should say to that, Speedy.” (Dancer)

“If you can't find the words, just tsukkomi by slapping the back of my head.”

“Like this?” (Dancer)

“Ouch! Why did you do that? I'm a head trauma patient!”

“S-sorry, you told me to...” (Dancer)

“Your timing is completely off!”

The ladies weren't amused by our slapstick comedy routine.

“Are you done?” (Kimono)

“Done and gone. Let's roll.”

Hmm, how many wanted levels do you get from stealing Strangers tech and killing military personnel in this world?

“Maybe we should paint the car when we get to the mansion.”

“Why?” (Crys)

“Ee, to confuse the authorities? No, forget it, it's my war wound talking... Don't mention the war!”

I'm going to milk this war wound thing for stupid jokes for a long time.

...Fuu. Whatever Crys gave me to ease the pain is still kicking my dorsal posterior. I'm not going to get addicted to opiates, I'm not going to get addicted...

We left Michael Horse in the forest. Goodbye, horsey horse. Yaa-hoo!