《Congratulations, You're Dead!》# 40

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It's just over an hour until dawn when we arrive, and everyone's still asleep. The girls are spooning on the bench next to me, Apricot loves being little spoon because her wings didn't allow for it before now. It's a bit weird seeing her immaterial appendages phase through Amelia and the bench behind. But, what about my life isn't at least a little weird.

"Oliver." I Windwhisper to the Mage in his bunk next to the door. "Wakeup. I need you to get us through the gate, unless of course you'd like me to cause a panic while there's an army camped on the other side of the river."

"Have they attacked yet?" He asks after snapping awake.

"No, but it looks like they will at first light. I can see the sentries starting to rouse everyone. Looks like two-thousand troops and thirteen mages, but most of them are between levels five and ten. One is closer to your strength, but not quite there."

"They can't sense you probing, can they?" He says worriedly from next to the bench, looking out at the approaching wall.

"Can you?" I say flatly without even looking at him.

"Good point." He nods. "Stop here and I'll get us inside." He then uses a Windwhisper of his own to talk to the guards at the gate.

I pull over and the lack of vibration causes the girls to wake. "Morning sleepy heads." I use magic to fix their bed heads as they groggily sit up. "We're here, and just in time too." This takes a minute to filter through their brains before they both seem to catch on at the same time.

"The Cendassans?" Amelia asks.

"About two thousand, preparing to attack at dawn." I conjure a hologram of the stirring army.

"That's a lot of horses, but those look more like infantry. The leaders must have had them ride doubled up for most of the way to keep the men fresh and still be able to get here this quickly." Oliver says after examining the image. "They're opening the gates now, pull on in, and stop off to the right. They've sent a runner to bring the City Lord and his Captain of the Guard. I've also woken Her Majesty, and she will be down in a moment."

Two horses come racing up a not long later, their riders dismounting and going to one knee when the Queen steps out to greet them. "Baron Pepi, Captain Baca, please rise."

"Where's Bradford?" Oliver adds.

"If he's a Mage." I interject. "Then he's not in the city." I project thirteen faces in the air ahead of us, with little elemental symbols above their heads. "These are the only Awakened within my reach, and they're all on the other side of the river."

"That bastard ran away as soon as the army came into sight!" Pepi spits, and clutches the knife at his belt. "Sorry your majesty." He bows deeply to her with an embarrassed look on his face.

"Bradford will be sorry once I get my hands on him." Oliver growls before locking his sight onto one of the enemy mages. "That's Kimball Palmer, second strongest Mage in Cendassa, and a right bastard. Can you show us who's in charge?"

"Yes, it looks like they're just meeting in the command tent now." I answer.

Twelve of the faces disappear, while the last one, Palmer, grows a body and steps into a transparent tent. At the table inside are two people, a burly man with a mostly bald head, and bushy mustache. And, a slender long-haired brunette woman, that might be considered pretty if it weren't for the vicious look in her eyes.

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"General Angelico Lilas, and Lady Cinda Reed." Oliver provides names to go with the faces. "The head of their army, and the King's only sister." He adds for my benefit after seeing the question on my face.

"Want to change the plan? I can capture them easily." I offer the Queen.

"No, I think I like your original idea better." She gets an evil gleam in her eyes.

"Yes, Your Majesty." A grin plays on my face. "Shall we adjourn to the wall? I believe having the Sun come up behind you would make for a fitting first impression."

"Oh, you do love putting on a show." Her smile widens to match mine.

"Your Majesty, it's not safe." Captain Baca nearly shouts.

Queen Vivian just raises an eyebrow at the man before returning to the bus. Oliver shakes his head and follows. Amelia does the same, while Apricot lets out an evil chuckle. "Oh, man. You don't know what you're in for; better hop on, or you'll miss the show." She gets on next, and I follow her.

"Coming?" I question from the door, and they rush after us. I changed the interior to plain, if plush benches while we were talking, with a special seat for the Queen up front. The new comers have to move back several rows and are a bit startled when the vehicle moves forward with a loud purr.

The streets are still empty, whether from the early hour, or from the people just being too fearful to leave their homes. So, we make excellent time and arrive at the west gate much faster than even a galloping horse could have gotten there.

Once we stop, I melt the front of the bus away and conjure stairs leading directly to the top of the wall over the gate. Everyone follows as The Queen mounts the steps, leaving only the sleeping princess back on the bus.

"Think Faye is going to be sad she missed it?" Apricot asks.

"I'll make her a playback later." I chuckle. "Censored, of course." I add after a glance from the queen. "Look at them all out there. Who attacks the east at dawn anyways?" I muse more to myself than anything.

"Fools." The Queen answers. "But fools who would have taken the city if it were not for you."

"Are you ready? The sun will start rising in just a few minutes." She nods, and I think of something perfect for this situation. Quickly making a high backed throne for her from wood, and coating it with gold. I then melt down some silica and add a few minerals before forming it into a large stained glass rendition of the Royal seal to sit above her head.

"Nice touch." She compliments before sitting down.

"Here we go." I levitate her forward to the edge of the wall just as the Sun peeks over the horizon. The golden rays of dawn hitting the seal and bathing the Cendassan army in her colors. Seemingly freezing them all in place.

"It's the Queen!" The general shouts, from the rear of course. "A gold to any archer that hits her." But I walk up next to her then, and every archer and crossbowman finds their weapons melt in their hands before they can even aim.

I go to one knee beside her, and she simply nods to me and says quietly "Bring them." I rise and bow deeply to her before walking down invisible steps to the base of the bridge.

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"General Lilas, Lady Reed, Mage Palmer." My voice covers the enemy forces, despite the fact that I don't raise my volume above a normal conversational tone. "My Queen wishes to speak with you."

"What are you fools waiting for?" The general roars. "Kill him, he's just one man!"

The soldiers at front rush me but their weapons melt in their hands, just like the archers did. But, it doesn't stop there; my magic flows out dissolving all of their equipment and clothing, before spreading out in a wave as I slowly walk forward. I even discreetly cast Cleanse on the lot because they all stink.

The few crazy enough to still charge me just end up bouncing backwards to fall on their asses. The poor mages try casting spell after spell, only to have them fizzle out before they can even form.

"I said that Her Royal Majesty, Queen Vivian Laren wishes to speak with you." I reach the commanders and by that time, they and their entire army are completely naked. Most huddled over and shaking in the morning cold, or out of fear. Quite a few with tears and snot running down their faces, a couple unfortunates even pissed themselves. "Don't make me tell you again."

Ultimatum given, I about face and walk back to the bridge. Three captives floating an inch off the ground behind me. Once at the foot of the bridge, I kneel down and salute with a fist to my heart. The prisoners behind me are forced to their hands and knees with their heads pressed to the rough stones.

"Your Majesty. I've brought the... people you wish to speak to." The inflection I give to 'people' makes it clear that it was not my first word choice.

"Thank you Marquis Rumex, you may rise." I do and step aside, not letting the surprise of my promotion show on my face. "Oh, Cinda." The Queen lets out a tired sigh, like that of a mother who's tired of dealing with a misbehaving child. "Didn't anyone ever teach you or Berkie not to take that which does not belong to you?"

"..." The king's sister just shivers, her mouth flopping open like a fish out of water, while tears and snot coat the grime on her face.

"Nothing to say for yourself?" Vivian asks mockingly. "Very well, I would like you to take a message back to your brother for me."

"Y-y-y-yes, anything." The mess of a woman finally speaks, her relief at being told she will be freed palpable.

"It's simple really. Larendath is not such an easy nut to crack, and the next time you try." The Queen pauses for dramatic effect. "You will lose more than just your clothes. Now, leave." I make her command reverberate over the army, causing most of them to cover their ears in pain.

Reed nearly pisses herself before running away, the rest of the army breaks at that point. Fleeing as fast as they can on the rough ground without shoes, or dignity. I let the first of them get close to the horses still picketed at what used to be their campsite, before making them all rear back and gallop in a large circle around the invaders. Opening the gate, I send them all into the city.

"Ooh, that was wicked." Apricot says after landing on my shoulder. "How you holding up?"

"I'll need to sleep until sunrise tomorrow, after this." I say through clenched teeth. "That fuck Palmer never stopped fighting me. Remind me to just put the mages to sleep if I have to do this shit again."

"Tiny dicked asshole!" Apricot spits at his retreating form. He then looks back, almost as though he heard her. Only to trip over his own feet when he spots The Fae on my shoulder. "Hahahahaha!" She breaks up laughing, and nearly falls over herself. The Mage's entire body flushes a bright pink. He then starts running off twice as fast as before, his greater level letting him easily outpace everyone else.

Once he's out of sight and the rest are well over a kilometer away, I finally turn around and head inside. The rest of the party comes flowing down the regular steps a minute later, I had to drop the conjured ones.

*Ding**Ding**Ding* A series of delayed notifications pop up in my vision.

"Don't tell me you leveled again already." Apricot scoffs.

"No, just a few delayed skill-ups and couple more steps closer to Mastery." I explain. "Turns out fighting a dozen mages for control like that is really good practice. Maybe I can work out something with Oliver or the guild."

"Of course, you would think of something like that." She shakes her head before stilling as the Queen approaches.

"Ma'am" I nod to the Queen. "Forgive me for not bowing again, but I'm afraid that I might fall over if I do." I say without actually letting my fatigue show through.

"No need. Young man. No need." She replies, her emotions well hidden.

I use one last precious bit of strength to repair the front of the bus. "Perhaps we could head to the Baron's Manor? I need a bit of a rest right now, but I should be able to get you back to the Capital by tomorrow."

"Sorrel!" Amelia runs up and puts her arms around me like she's hugging me, but is actually helping to hold me up. "You were amazing." She says out loud, but her eyes are full of worry.

***

It's sunset by the time I drag my ass out of bed. Amelia and Apricot are sitting in the next room, one reading a book, the other playing breakout.

"Hey, girls." I say from the doorway. "How was your day?"

"Sorrel!" - "Baby!" The rush me, tackling me back into the room where we collapse on the bed.

"Hahaha. This isn't the first time I've over drawn, you know? I was mostly just tired from staying up all night." I smile and try to downplay my state as they check me over, ignoring my words.

"Hush, we're allowed to be worried about you." Amelia presser her finger to my lips. "You fought off an army earlier, and then held it together long enough to drive us all here. You didn't slip until the doors were closed, then we had to practically drag you into bed." Her worry gushes out of her. "So, be quiet and let us check you over."

"What she said." Apricot giggles. "Only you didn't fight them off, you humiliated the fuckers." Her ministrations turn rather more sensual.

"Dammit!" I curse just as we were starting to get into it. "Company." I warn the girls.

"Tell them to fuck off!" Apricot growls.

"Move your hand and I might be able to." I laugh and try to peel her away from me. Amelia starts helping once knocks sound on the door to our suite. "Hello Baron, how can I help you?" My conjured hologram answers the door.

"Marquis." He bows. "Good, you're awake. Her Majesty was hoping you three would be able to join us for the evening meal." I have to block out our collective groans from reaching his ears.

"Of course, we'll be right out." I make the hologram nod to him before closing the door. "I really need to work on time magic next, make a bubble where we have all the time we want." I huff out, annoyed.

"It's alright babe, we've already got all the time in the world." Amelia comforts me.

"It is not alright." Apricot grouses. "I haven't had him inside me in nearly two days."

"If we don't get a chance before we leave, then I'll take care of you on the road after everyone's gone to sleep. " I play my hand up and down her spine as she sits there sulking on the edge of the bed. "But, for now, my beautiful little Marchioness. Duty calls."

"Fine, but you'd better." She pouts.

"What she said." Amelia parrots the pixie's earlier comment with a sly smile.

After that, it only takes a couple minutes before we're all cleaned up and dressed. We stalk down the hallways like a trio of lions that just had their kill interrupted. Reaching the door to the over-sized dining room, Amelia and I put on our court faces. It's surprising just how quickly one develops such habits once they need them. Apricot doesn't bother and just shrinks down instead, so most that most people can't even make out her face.

The room breaks into spontaneous applause once I open the door, freezing me in my steps for a heartbeat. Letting a smile play on my face, I nod to the room before approaching the Queen.

"Your Majesty." I bow deeply. "Please forgive my rudeness from this morning. I let my exhaustion get the better of me." I'm playing it up a bit, but our allies as well as our enemies need to know that I'm firmly under her thumb. Even if that's not exactly true.

"There is nothing to forgive." She says with a twinkle to her eyes, letting me know that she understands what I'm doing. "After all, I set you to such a difficult task in the first place. Without even giving you a chance to rest from personally transporting us here from the Capital in a single night. You have our thanks once again, Sorrel. Now, please sit, enjoy the meal." We bow and curtsy before taking our seats.

"Smooth." Oliver Windwhispers so only we can hear him, earning a sly smile from me.

Dinner is served shortly after, and the mood at the table is joyous. Apparently the entire city has been involved in celebration ever since word of my victory spread.

Plenty of small talk happens during the meal, but most of it is the Baron trying to feel me out. As a Marquis I'm now responsible for protecting the border, which is pretty much just Riverton. And, despite its size and the amount of money it brings in, the city is still in the middle of nowhere. So, it's only been run by a hereditary barony before now.

I try to re-assure the man that I really don't care how the place is run, in polite terms of course. But, he's still worried. "Is there anything the city needs while I'm here?" I finally ask trying to let him know that I care more about helping out than taking over. "Are the farms doing alright? It's nearly harvest time, after all."

"Honestly, some new blight took a hefty toll of our barley during spring. We have more than enough to make it through winter, but if today hasn't stopped the coming war..." He trails off with a worried look.

"Hmm, pale green, water-soaked spots that dry out as they expand to cover the leaves? Stopped once the weather warmed up?" I throw out a guess.

"That's it exactly." He looks startled. "How did you know?"

I hold up a hand to show off my tattoos. "I know plants. That's barley blight, the higher humidity near the river helps it spread. Try rotating those areas to non grain crops, and be sure to bury the crop residue deep. Replant a year later with disease free seed." I tell him how to manage it. "And, don't worry about feeding the city. If it comes down to it, I can make more than enough food for everyone." 'in the country' I add silently.

"Thank you Lord Rumex." He bows in his seat.

"Just Sorrel is fine, please." I wave away the formality.

"You prove yourself more valuable every day, Sorrel." The Queen says from the head of the table. "Riverton is not the only place to be affected by this blight recently. I will have word spread that the new lord of the grasslands..." She pauses with a frown on her face. "No, that won't do. This area has never been given a proper name, so I will leave it up to you. You may call it Rumex if you wish, or think up something more fitting."

"Hmm." I try out a few names in my head, trying to find one that fits and doesn't sound weird. It takes me a minute, as I've never been good at naming things, but I finally settle on the perfect one. "Arcadia" I nod satisfied with how it sounds in this tongue. "It's an ancient province famed for its idyllic natural beauty. So, much so that the name became synonymous with paradise."

"Arcadia, I like it." Amelia says from next to me.

"As do I." Queen Vivian nods. "But, you certainly do not know how to dream small, do you?" Her laughter fills the room. "Very well, Lord of Arcadia. We can't wait to see the paradise you bring to the grasslands."

"What can I say? I've always wanted a really big garden." This gets a round of laughs from the table.

***

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