《Virtuous Cultivation》103. Chickens
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Eh?
Mei woke up, feeling a bit strange. Hadn't she been sleeping in a different position?
Granted, she would often roll while asleep, but something about it felt wrong this time.
...probably nothing.
Her book was put down on its back and upside down, the summary face up. She didn't remember putting it down like that.
"It's time for community service! Put my jade to your sect token and I'll teleport you there!"
Urgh...
Mei sighed. At least she didn't have to walk all the way over.
...
Mei landed on soft, verdant grass.
Around her, to her shock, was a huge area of farmland, with fenced-off grass, where various animals walked around lazily. Oddly enough, various board games were lying around at random, along with little swimming pools and outdoor kitchens. Not to mention random mansions built here and there.
This...
She wasn't told her community service was going to be related to farming! Qiao Shun, that bastard!
Behind her, she sensed the presence of the evil old lady, who cackled softly in a very annoying manner.
Damn it. The only reason why "fake grandma" didn't bother her for so long was because of how well she managed to avoid thinking about it. A few days ago, she realised that her inner demon only appeared when she thought about farming! And now...
With this as her sentence, there was no way she could avoid it now!
"Qiao Shun said something about this being a chance to face your inner demon. Have fun."
"I-I didn't agree to this! I had it sorted out already anyway!" Mei stuttered while stumbling around in a panic.
"Sorry, bud. I don't make the rules."
"Grrrr..."
Looking around, she could see disciples tending to the animals and ploughing fields of rice.
"I will guide you to your posts. It should change daily, so don't be surprised if you get assigned to a different spot tomorrow."
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Mei walked over to a massive pen of chickens with a dejected expression. She hopped over the gate, sat on the ground, then started tracing circles in a sandy patch with her fingers.
For such a large pen, there really weren't that many of them. Most of them gave her stares but went back to doing their thing.
One chicken, however, strutted over slowly.
"Hey. You must be the new caretaker."
"Ah!"
It can talk?!
"Hey. If you act so surprised, I'll get offended, you know?"
"Uh, okay?"
"Bawk! What type of response is that! Shouldn't you be saying sorry to that?!"
Mei shook her head. No way she would apologise to a chicken!
"I didn't do anything wrong! What's wrong with you?"
"Bawk! You come here, and first thing you do is laze around! Get to work right away!"
"It's literally been only a minute! Give me a moment!"
Mei covered her ears, bottling her anger as the chicken continued to boss her around.
"Hey! Why do I get so few crickets!"
"Because you were an ass to me earlier!"
"Small-minded! Petty!"
Mei couldn't help but feel smug as the chicken hopped around angrily before its half-empty bowl, the other chickens pecking happily at their full bowls of seasoned crickets.
Hmph. It should have known. She was the caretaker and had the authority!
"I can report you to management and extend your community service!"
Mei: !!!!
...for the first time in her life, she apologised to an animal.
"You can't be serious..."
The chicken... was telling her to cook?
"You don't expect us to eat worms from the ground, do you? There's a recipe book on the table! Get cooking!"
So that's why there were outdoor kitchens...
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She walked over and grumpily flipped through the book. There was an awful lot of insect-based recipes...
Stupid chickens. They were just stupid birds, yet they were so arrogant.
She angrily began chopping some crickets to make some sort of cricket pancake (it seemed like one of the easier recipes to her).
"Psst."
"What? I told you not to talk to me!" Mei yelled at the jade.
"Sheesh! Just a little alright?"
"Whatever."
"You're mad at them, aren't you? You really want them to boss you around for weeks? Even me, I feel pained witnessing this! Ah, truly, it is tragic to be too kind."
Mei: ...
"I tell you what. Tomorrow, bring some chicken from the cafeteria over and eat it in front of them. That will show them who's boss!"
Urgh.
That actually sounded really tempting. But...
"You got sealed precisely because you keep doing stuff like this, don't you? I'm not interested in worsening my karma."
It would have been really satisfying, but having to do more community service was a nightmarish thought. At least so far, it didn't feel very much like farming, so she managed to avoid thinking about it.
"Ah. Too bad then."
...
"You overcooked them! Some are half burnt! You expect us to eat trash like this?"
"What do you expect? I'm not a chef!"
One of the chickens shook its head before pecking the extremely bossy chicken, the source of all of Mei's troubles.
"Hah. It's not unexpected. This only happened because we fired our old cook to buy the Illusionary World Artefact. Free workers aren't going to cut it."
Huh? They were buying artefacts?!
"Hmph. Someone needs to teach her how to cook then."
There was a moment of silence. Then all the chickens looked to the chicken who spoke up.
"What? Why me?" it bawked.
Mei wanted to smash her head into the wok as she watched the chicken cook. Despite having no hands, it perfectly controlled the cookware with just qi sense.
What was it with this sect and animals that were experts at cooking?
And considering that amount of control, this chicken definitely had higher cultivation than her... Mei was very glad she wasn't tempted by the spirit, or she would have faced an army of angry chickens with higher cultivation.
After the grumpy chicken and its assistant, an even more grumpy Mei finished preparing the dishes, the chickens ate up, then all headed into one of the mansions.
Hah. Of course the nice houses belonged to the "livestock".
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