Chapter 02

There were only three adventurers in all, but they looked a great deal more capable than Nadine, Clarice and Emelia. For starters, all three of them were wearing matching chainmail armour and holding their weapons in a way that made it clear they knew how to use them.

“Don’t think you can hide it!” The tallest of the three adventurers growled accusingly, “We saw you steal our monster!”

Nadine stepped forward with her hands open at her sides to try and show them that she had no ill intentions, “Ah, I am sorry about that. My teammate got a little carried away and ordered her minion to capture it. We were too far away to see that it had already been injured. Please forgive us.”

“I forgive nothing!” The adventurer fumed, “How are you going to make this right?!”

Before Nadine had a chance to answer, one of the other adventurers chimed in, “Hey they are all pretty cute right? How about you girls keep us company tonight and we call it even?”

I really couldn’t help but feel disgusted hearing such a proposal and judging by the flash of anger in Nadine’s eyes, I could only assume she felt the same.

“We will take this matter before the Guild and they will sort it out!” Nadine replied coldly.

“Yeah,” Clarice chimed in, “I would rather sleep with Tim before sharing the same room with the likes of you ugly bastards,” she hooked her thumb back towards me to make it clear who she was talking about.

“Yeah!” Emelia agreed emphatically, “At least Tim smells like candy!”

“Y-you bitches!” The adventurer who propositioned Nadine cursed angrily and brandished his longsword threateningly.

Seeing things were quickly going south, I took a firm grip on my club and limbered up a little. I wasn’t sure if I could bring myself to actually hurt any of them, but they didn't know that.

“Hey, calm down you idiot! That’s an Ogre!” The adventurer who hadn’t spoken yet insisted to his companion.

Nadine retreated back to our group and glared coldly at the other adventurers, “I am willing to ignore what you said and settle this at the Guild office. If you try to attack us, we will not hold back!” She hissed, drifting closer to my side to make the point clear who had the bigger advantage in an open fight.

“Fine!” The leader spat angrily, turning and heading back to the town from the opposite direction,

Nadine let out a long sigh of relief, “Well that could have gone better,” she murmured.

“We could take’em,” Clarice grunted with dissatisfaction.

“No way they could beat Tim,” Emelia agreed enthusiastically.

“And what about the Guild? HRM?!” Nadine interjected, “Do you think they would look so kindly on breaking the rules about fighting so close to the foothold?!”

Clarice and Emelia glanced at one another and didn’t answer.

Nadine sighed and shook her head, “Forget it, what’s done is done. Let’s just hope the Guild evaluates Toofy as low value...”

“Uhm...” Emelia had a somewhat guilty look on her face, “I don’t think they will.”

“Hrm? Why?” Nadine asked worriedly.

Emelia fidgeted nervously, “Well...Toofy has a class and is already level two.”

Nadine’s expression grew dour, “Show me,’ she sighed resignedly.

“Alright,” Emelia agreed guiltily, “Sorry Nadine, I didn’t know I just-”.

“-I know, I know...” Nadine interrupted. “Scavenger huh? At least that should be useful once we go a little deeper in the Labyrinth.”

“What’s it do?” Clarice asked greedily.

“You’ll love this,” Nadine sighed, “Its starting class ability detects treasure in a radius determined by its Intelligence stat. It’s a lot like the thief ability.”

“What other abilities does it have?” Clarice asked eagerly.

“You mean its racial abilities?” Nadine asked.

“No! The other class abilities of Scavenger!” Clarice insisted impatiently.

Nadine frowned, “I don’t know. Monsters only get one class ability per tier and I am not familiar with this particular monster class.”

“Monsters only get one ability per class tier? Lame!” Clarice huffed dejectedly.

“You would rather boss and special monsters had more abilities?” Nadine asked icily.

Clarice stiffened, “Ah, actually you’re right, one ability is fine.”

“What about Tim then?” Emelia asked, “What class should we give him?”

Nadine was thoughtful for a moment and then shrugged apologetically, “I don’t know how to unlock any of the monster classes for Ogres. The Guild might know, but that information is probably expensive.”

“What about the Taskmaster?” Emelia asked, “It’s like another monster taming class isn’t it?”

Nadine thought about it for a moment and nodded, “I think that is the beginner class for the Slaver. If I am remembering right, it makes other monsters stronger or something like that.”

“Oooh, really?! So Tim would make Toofy and any other monsters I tame stronger?” Emelia asked excitedly.

“Maybe, I am not really sure, it has been a while since-” Nadine tried to explain but was interrupted.

“ALRIGHT! TIM YOU’RE NOW MY TASKMASTER!” Emelia declared emphatically, the proclamation accompanied by a sudden burst of golden light.

[You have acquired the Basic Class: {Taskmaster}.]

[Class: Taskmaster. +1 Willpower, +5 HP.] [Exp: 0/1000 ]

[(Class Ability: Word of the master): The Monsters and Slaves in your party obey your commands as if you were their master. Disobeying your direct commands requires a contest of (Willpower). Degree of failure will result in pain being administered until the command is obeyed or the command is rescinded.]

I honestly almost blinked and missed the sudden messages.

“What did you DO?!” Nadine demanded.

Emelia shrank back and awkwardly smiled to try and break the tension, “Well you said Taskmaster was a good class and he already had it unlocked so I gave it to him,” she explained apologetically.

“Emelia...” Nadine looked like it was taking everything she had just to remain civil, “We could have found a way to make Tim an Ogre mage! Not only is it a race exclusive class but it's an incredibly powerful one that would have made the most of his high Intelligence!”

“Oh...” Emelia replied dejectedly, “I’m sorry, I just got really excited...”

Nadine sighed and shook her head, “It’s fine, what’s done is done. Once we get rich from the lower floors of the Labyrinth, maybe we can pay for a class retraining or something.”

“Could be worse,” Clarice added snarkily, “Emelia could have made him a Barbarian or something. Just imagine trying to keep a handle on him the moment he flies into a rage.”

“That’s true,” Nadine sighed, "Could you share his stats with me Emelia, so I can see what his class does?”

Emelia nodded, “Done.”

“Oh, well this isn’t so bad at least,” Nadine commented.

“What is it?” Clarice asked curiously.

“Tim can now command any other monsters or slaves Emelia manages to take in just the same as she can. At least now there is someone else to keep a tight rein on things.”

“Sure,” Clarice agreed, “I mean at this rate we could practically start our own adventuring charter by the end of the week.”

“Please use the ability responsibly,” Nadine asked me quietly, so Emelia couldn’t hear, “Also, try and keep that Goblin from mischief.”

I nodded to show I understood, but I wasn’t actually sure what exactly Nadine expected me to do. After all, couldn’t Emelia just supersede any commands I give to Toofy any time she wanted? This just seems like I am being punished for Emelia’s mistakes...

Since I was now responsible for Toofy, I supposed it would probably be a good idea to patch her up somewhat while on our way to the Guild office. Then again, until we had made it back into town, I couldn’t remove her from the sack without drawing in more of the Vrabbits again.

I cleared my throat to try and get Nadine’s attention, “Uhm, shouldn’t we patch-up Toofy’s injuries? Wouldn't it be bad if she bled out before we make it to town?”

Nadine gave me a curious look for a moment before turning her attention to Emelia “Emelia, has your new Goblin been losing HP?”

“Hrm...ah, I’m not sure,” Emelia admitted with a little embarrassment.

Nadine sighed and nodded, as if she expected as much, “Why don’t you share the status with Tim so he can keep an eye on it?” She suggested.

“Alright!” Emelia agreed.

A few moments later a fresh wall of text appeared in front of me.

[Toofy - Goblin: 1 ] [HP: 3/19] [MP: 0/3 ]

[Emelia’s Slave*] [Class: Scavenger 2. +2 Intelligence, +1 Toughness, +5 HP. ] [Exp: 7/3000 ]

[Strength: 7 ]

[Agility: 13 ]

[Toughness: 6 ]

[Intelligence: 5* ]

[Willpower: 6* ]

[Presence: 5 ]

[(Class Ability: Treasure Sense): Detects and highlights items of value within a predetermined range. {Intelligence} increases range.]

[(Racial Ability: Vicious {Rank 0}): Deals additional damage to fallen enemies and those with {Negative Status Conditions}. {Willpower} increases the amount of bonus damage.]

[(Racial Ability: Underfoot {Rank 0}): Takes less damage from Larger enemies. {Agility} increases the level of damage resistance.]

Isn’t Toofy surprisingly strong? No wonder she managed to get away from those other adventurers. But what the hell is up with that Vicious ability? A monster specialising in harming people at their most vulnerable seems a bit much.

“Status,” In addition to my own information, I could now see Toofy’s information by looking slightly to my right. In order to keep an eye on her HP, I would need to keep bringing up the information screens as we walked. It was really irritating that blinking caused all of the information to disappear, shouldn’t there be some way to keep at least the most important information available at all times?

“Nadine?” I asked politely to get her attention again, “Is there some way to keep some of the stat information even after blinking?”

“Oh, right, I hadn’t told you about it yet. Thanks for reminding me. You should be able to keep a basic cut down version of the stat screen for yourself, Toofy and Emelia by saying Master Status Core,” Nadine explained helpfully, “Also, and I am not sure this will work, you can try replacing Master with Party instead. If it works, you should be able to see the basic information for Clarice and I as well.”

“Thanks," I nodded politely, “Let's try the first one then, Master Status Core.”

Immediately three small panes appeared in the lower periphery of my vision.

[Tim - HP: 45/45 - Normal ] [Emelia - HP: 25/25 - Normal ] [Toofy - HP: 3/19 - Bloodied ]

I experimented with blinking a few times and was happy to see that the information panes remained. “Alright, let’s try the other one. Party Status Core.”

Nothing happened.

“Did it work?” Nadine asked curiously.

I shook my head, “Nope, nothing changed,” I replied disappointedly.

Nadine shrugged, “I guess we'll just need to keep in mind if a fight is going against us.”

Clarice's helmet shifted in such a way that it seemed like she was exaggeratedly rolling her eyes.

Thankfully, Toofy’s HP did not decline during our walk back to town, although she did squirm about in the sack every so often.

It was my first time being brought to the Guild office and I was a little disappointed by how unimpressive the building looked from the outside. It just seemed like pretty much any other building in town, made from rough wooden planks and red bricks with open unglassed windows.

The inside was much the same, although it was apparent that at least some attempt had been made to make it more presentable. The ground floor looked very similar to a small bank. There were chairs against the far wall, an advertising bulletin board and a row of desks with professional formally dressed staff seated behind them.

Besides the Guild staff, the only other people present were the three adventurers from earlier. They were currently engaged in a heated discussion with what appeared to be the bank-erm Guild manager.

“They just stole it right out from under us!” The leader grouched.

The manager nodded with an expression of tested patience, “You have said as much a dozen times already sir. Please take a seat while we wait for the accused party.”

“Accused?!” The pervy party member chimed in, “Bloody guilty! More like! We even offered them a fair deal to settle the matter!”

“FAIR DEAL?!” Clarice roared indignantly, instantly drawing the attention of everyone in the room, “You tried blackmailing us into sleeping with you! You disgusting slimeball!”

The initially surprised expressions from Clarice’s outburst now turned to poorly concealed disgust as the female Guild staff members shifted their attention from Clarice to the three adventurers.

“Urk, well...It was a special Goblin! It’s valuable!” The pervy adventurer insisted defensively.

“Dude! Shut the hell up!” The tactful party member hissed.

The manager was not amused, “Mister Andros! You have been warned about soliciting fellow adventurers before! Pending the outcome of this investigation, you may find yourself blacklisted from the adventurers Guild!”

The pervy adventurer Andros staggered back a step as if the manager had struck him in the gut.

The manager gave an exasperated sigh, straightened his vest and approached us with an apologetic smile, “Due to the nature of the accusation, I would please ask that you temporarily relinquish the monster to our custody. While the assessor determines the value of the monster, we can conduct interviews to determine the truth of the matter. I trust this is agreeable?” The manager asked politely.

Nadine nodded, “I have an additional request, that Tim-” she motioned to me, “-be allowed to stay with the Goblin during the assessment. He has the Taskmaster class and can make sure the Goblin is compliant.”

The manager was a little surprised by Nadine's request, but nodded, ”Alright then. If you would please follow me upstairs the assessor will retrieve Tim and the contested Goblin momentarily. Feel free to leave your bounties and belongings with any of the staff if necessary.”

Following Nadine's lead, Clarice and Emelia handed over their practically bursting sacks of Vrabbits to one of the Guild staff like the manager suggested.

“So many for such a small group,” the staff member commented in surprise, “You think maybe they have been stealing from other party’s after all?”

Another staff member came over to take a look inside one of the sacks and shook their head, “I don't think so. Most of these Vrabbits look half crushed and they do have an Ogre. Hunting even this many was probably child’s play.”

“Really?” The first staff member asked with surprise, looking at me as if they had just noticed me for the first time.

A woman in a long coat and tightly bound dark hair entered the room from the back area, “Alright, where is this Goblin I am meant to be assessing?” She asked a little sleepily.

“Ah, over there,” one of the staff pointed in my direction.

I walked over and held up Toofy’s sack, “Toofy is in here,” I explained.

Perhaps more shocked than Clarice’s earlier outburst, the Guild staff that had been assigned to the counter were surprised, to say the least. Did they not expect me to talk?

The newly arrived woman who I assumed to be the assessor mentioned earlier, did not seem surprised so much as curious. “You seem rather articulate for an Ogre,” she commented curiously, “Perhaps I should assess you as well?”

“Ah, Miss Celia they did not consent to that...” One of the Guild staff reminded her before adding more quietly, “Wouldn’t doing something like that get you into more trouble?”

“Hrmph!” The assessor Celia crossed her arms and pouted, “Fine! Bring out this Goblin and let's get it over with!”

I nodded and reached into the sack, after fumbling for a handhold, I pulled Toofy out from the sack and got a better grip by the back of her way too large belt.

Toofy just hung there limply as if she had fallen unconscious or died. Her ruse was undermined by opening her eyes every couple of seconds and looking around before overdramatically playing possum again.

“Put the Goblin down on the table,” Celia ordered and took out a black leather collar from her coat.

“Ah, Ms Celia, the command collar shouldn’t be necessary. Ms Nadine said the Ogre is a Taskmaster.”

“Oh really?” Celia shrugged, “Alright, Ogre command the Goblin to stay still and then put it down on the desk.”

Every time they said the word, I couldn't help but flinch, wanting this to be over as quickly as possible, I did as Celia asked, “Toofy stay still,” I commanded and carefully put her down on the desk.

“Kay!” Toofy replied, her beady eyes intently watching Celia as she drew closer.

“And no biting, keep your jaws shut” I hastily added.

“Grrr!” Toofy growled angrily at her plan being thwarted.

“Assessment!” Celia pressed her hand against Toofy’s forehead. A few moments later she sighed and shook her head, “It’s about what is to be expected in a case like this. It’s a Named Goblin with two levels in a basic class,” she drew her hand back again and began washing it in a prepared basin of soapy water.

One of the other Guild staff members transcribed what Celia said and then went upstairs.

“Just leave the Goblin there for now,” Celia sighed dismissively, “The manager will decide what is to be done with it.” She dried her hand on her coat and then hopped up to sit on the desk, giving me a rather disconcertingly intense stare.

Time passed slowly and a few other adventurer groups came and went, buying supplies or making inquiries with the Guild staff. It seemed as Nadine had told me, pretty much all the adventurers around here are as new to this as they are and don't know much more than I do.

“You are pretty smart aren’t you,” Celia commented quietly, “Has to be almost human level Intelligence at least.”

I realised that perhaps I had been too obvious in my eavesdropping and tried my best to look inconspicuous.

“Tib, Toofy node itches!” Toofy complained through gritted teeth.

I sighed and carefully scratched Toofy’s nose for her.

“Toofy mouth tired,” Toofy whined her beady eyes watering pitiably,

It seemed cruel to just leave her like that, so I decided to be more specific with the command “Alright, you can unclench your jaw now, but no biting!”

“Grr, Tim no fun!” Toofy complained grumpily, “Toofy hungry!” She wailed, tears running down her cheeks.

Now I really felt bad. If Toofy was that injured, doesn't it make sense that she would become hungry as her body tried to replace all the blood she had lost? Unfortunately, I didn't have anything to feed Toofy. Nadine, Emelia and Clarice all had emergency rations in their backpacks, but all I had was the clothes on my back and the sack I had been using to carry her around in.

“Waaaah,” Toofy continued wailing pitiably like a child.

Actually, that raised an important question, how old is Toofy? The way she has been behaving is very reminiscent of a child. Well...a child with a mouth full of sharp teeth and a shiv hidden somewhere on its body.

Celia glared at Toofy irritably, “Shut up."

Toofy whimpered at the sudden rebuke but quickly rallied. “Grrrr!” Toofy’s expression hardened and she began angrily growling and baring her teeth at Celia, “Bite you! Eat you!” Toofy growled menacingly.

Hrm, perhaps my assessment was a little off? Toofy was perhaps not childlike so much as driven by basic needs, lacking in self-restraint and shame. “Is there something I can feed her?” I asked no one in particular.

“If you are willing to answer a few questions, I will bring something for the Goblin to eat,” Celia offered with a smirk.

I hesitated, the way she had been staring at me was unnerving.

“Tim? Toofy hungry” Toofy sniffled, apparently more than aware of what was transpiring around her.

“Alright,” I agreed reluctantly.

Celia grinned wolfishly and hopped off the desk. She disappeared into the backroom behind the desks and returned with a plate of cooked meat. Judging by the size of the meat, I assumed it was roasted Vrabbit. Celia handed me the plate and sat back down on the desk again.

“Ahhhhh,” Toofy opened her mouth expectantly.

Picking up one of the boneless pieces of meat, I dropped it into Toofy’s mouth.

Toofy’s jaws slammed shut like a steel beartrap and she gulped the piece of meat down whole, “More! Ahhhh”.

“So, I have upheld my end of our bargain, are you prepared to answer my questions?” Celia asked.

I nodded, “Assuming I know the answer and it isn’t too intrusive,” I agreed.

“Interesting...” Celia withdrew a clipboard from under the desk and quickly wrote something down, “We shall start with something easy. What are you?”

I frowned disapprovingly, knowing what she meant by that particular question, “I am Tim,” I replied belligerently as I fed Toofy another piece of meat.

“Hrm? No, I didn't ask for your name, I asked what type of monster you are,” Celia clarified condescendingly.

“I am Tim,” I repeated stubbornly.

Celia frowned, “Fine, moving on, do you know what your Intelligence stat is?”

“I do,” I replied “And it’s ten,” I was fine giving away this information since she had just about guessed as much already.

Celia’s eyebrows rose in surprise, “Ten...Well, that makes sense...” She murmured, taking a full half a minute to write more notes before preparing to ask another question. ”What level of the Labyrinth did you come from? And from which Labyrinth?”

I wasn’t quite sure how to answer this question. Should I tell the full truth? No, I don’t think that would be a good idea at all. “I was captured on this floor, yesterday,” I replied somewhat truthfully, avoiding bringing up the subject of my true origins.

Celia was surprised and gave me an intense scrutinising look, “No collar,” she mumbled excitedly and began furiously writing more notes across several pages.

I was getting the feeling that perhaps I should have kept that answer far vaguer.

Toofy had now eaten the last of the meat and there was nothing left but the bones, leaving nothing left for Celia to bargain with.

“Where-” Celia began to ask but I interrupted her.

“No,” I said flatly and placed the plate down on the desk.

Celia frowned, “I can get you more meat,” she offered enticingly.

My stomach rumbled in response, “No,” I repeated firmly.

“Hey, be reasonable-” Celia began asking but was interrupted by Toofy this time.

“Tim say no!” Toofy growled menacingly. It was actually rather endearing and reminded me of a dog protecting its owner. Wait...that's probably not a good way to think of her. Wouldn’t that just make me Emelia’s dog?

Celia was about to say something else when Nadine, Clarice and Emelia returned downstairs accompanied by the manager. None of the girls looked particularly happy.

In contrast, the three adventurers seemed relatively upbeat when they descended the stairs a few moments later, except for Andros that is. Andros was even more dejected than Emelia. The three of them took a seat near the stairs and appeared to be waiting for something.

A few moments later, it quickly began to make sense.

“I need the Vrabbits in these sacks quickly sorted and valued,” the Guild manager announced, clapping his hands to accentuate the importance of the request.

The Guild staff quickly decided amongst themselves who would remain on regular duties and who would handle the priority sorting. I had learned earlier that the staff receive certain incentives like a sales commission for handling monster remains. So naturally, it required some compromising amongst themselves to determine who would benefit from this opportunity.

No less than five of the seven staff members pulled on thick leather gloves and began sorting through the Vrabbits inside the sacks. Besides keeping their hands relatively clean, it just made sense that they would wear sturdy gloves considering the sharp teeth of the Vrabbits haphazardly bundled into the sacks.

“Ugh, no way there is enough,” Clarice moaned, watching Vrabbits get laid out on one of the desks.

“Sorry...” Emelia apologised gloomily.

Nadine said nothing, just pursing her lips and watching the sorting with a tense expression on her face.

It did not take long for the Guild staff to work their way through all of the Vrabbits and double-check their work. “One hundred and three rank one Vrabbits in close to prime condition, worth forty-one copper coins. Four rank two Vrabbits in prime condition, worth twenty-two copper coins. Assuming the mana stones are all harvested and sold, the total projected value stands at sixty-three copper coins,” the Guild manager summarised.

”Not even close,” Clarice snorted in annoyance.

Nadine cleared her throat and addressed the Guild manager, “I would like to take out a short-term loan please."

The manager appeared to have expected as much and nodded with a concerned look on his face, “Are you sure? For this amount at your level it will need to include the indenturement clause and both of your party members would need to co-sign. Unless you are considering putting up your other monster as collateral?”

Even though the Guild manager could not have been nicer about it, I still couldn’t help but shiver at being treated like a literal commodity.

Nadine looked to Emelia and Clarice for confirmation.

“Of course!” Emelia nodded emphatically, “This is all my fault, but I’ll make sure to pay you both back later!”

Clarice had seemed to be on the fence, but after hearing that Emelia planned on paying them back, she sighed and nodded “Fine, but I want interest Emelia!”

“Alright, we will all sign for the loan,” Nadine confirmed.

“Very well, please accompany me to my office and we will fill out the required paperwork,” the Guild manager politely gestured back to the stairs.

“One moment please, is it alright if Tim and Toofy accompany us?” Nadine asked, glancing deliberately at the trio of adventurers in the corner.

The manager nodded in understanding, “It should be alright,” he agreed, “Just please make sure they behave themselves. It would be unfortunate to add the repair costs of damaged furniture to the amount of the loan after all.”

Nadine nodded and gave me a telling look.

I sighed and picked up Toofy, “Do you want to go back in the sack?” I asked.

Toofy considered this for a moment before shaking her head, causing the weathered copper pot that was serving as her helmet to fall off her head and revealed her big pointed ears. Well, one of them was pointed, the other had obviously been viciously assaulted by a Vrabbit and was half the length of the other. “Toofy will be good,” she insisted.

“Ah okay...” I agreed, picking Toofy up and carefully replaced the pot on her head. Because of her small size, I was easily able to fit Toofy into the large pocket on the front of my leather apron.

Toofy immediately gave the leather an experimental lick, “Pig!” She declared excitedly and began gnawing at the lip of the pocket.

Pretty sure that the apron would be fine, I ignored Toofy and followed the others up the stairs and into the Guild managers office.

The Guild manager sat down at his personal desk and pulled out a form from one of the drawers. He placed it down in front of Nadine, who was now sitting opposite him, so she could take the opportunity to read it first. “So, just to make sure you are clear on the most important aspects of the loan, I would like you to ask now if you have any questions. Of course, the indenturement clause in the event of multiple missed payments is particularly important.”

“What’s that?” Emelia asked.

“The indenturement clause will become active after missing three consecutive repayments or five non-consecutive repayments. In that eventuality, you will be forcibly required to repay your debt by working for the Guild at a fixed rate according to your level. While indentured, your debt will not grow, but many of your freedoms will be restricted. As none of you have criminal histories or demerits on file, the dormant slave mark will not be necessary,” the Guild manager carefully explained.

“Slave mark?” Emelia balked, “We would be slaves?!”

Nadine sighed, “No Emelia, he just explained that we would NOT be slaves. If we missed too many repayments we would basically be employees of the Guild until we worked off the debt.”

“Oh...” Emelia mumbled with embarrassment.

Clarice shook her head, “Still at the rate we would be paid at our level, it's almost a matter of semantics.”

The Guild manager made no attempts to correct her, instead, he nodded in agreement, “Even with your recent level up Ms Clarice and assuming that Ms Nadine and Emelia are not far behind, it would still take a little over a year to pay off the debt, assuming you didn't miss the next three repayment deadlines. So please consider this loan seriously.”

“Sheesh, a whole year,” Clarice hissed, “You sure about this Nadine? I mean, it's just a Goblin.”

Nadine nodded with a determined expression, “A named Goblin that has already unlocked a basic class. While not as valuable as Tim, Toofy will become more valuable when we go a couple of floors deeper and monsters start dropping valuable equipment. Much easier to make the investment now,’ she explained rationally.

“If you say so,” Clarice grimaced.

“It's not that bad,” Nadine Insisted, “Ten per cent interest is actually a rather good rate considering we aren’t putting up any collateral.”

“I suppose so,” Clarice agreed reluctantly, “I mean, what am I even worrying about. Tim almost earned one silver this morning without breaking a sweat. We should be able to pay back twenty-seven silver in no time!”

Nadine wavered her hand somewhat, “Well, not for a few days. We need the smell to subside first.”

Clarice stiffened, “Ah, yeah, right...”

“Is there anything else pertaining to the loan that you would like explained?” The Guild manager asked patiently.

Nadine and Clarice looked sidelong at Emelia.

Emelia blushed and shook her head self consciously.

“Alright then, one moment while I fill out the form and prepare it for your signatures,” the Guild manager quickly filled out the form, double-checked his work and set it down on the desk again, “Please make sure everything is correct before signing,” he insisted.

“Wait, why is the amount only twenty-six silver and eighty-one copper?” Emelia asked when it was her turn to sign.

The Guild manager politely cleared his throat, “The value of the Vrabbits was deducted from the required loan before applying the interest, resulting in a net savings of nine copper. The processing fee in this instance has of course been waived due to the special circumstances.”

“Oh...” Emelia blushed again and signed the form.

I am actually rather impressed with this Guild manager. When the subject of a loan had come up I thought that he would try and bleed the girls for as much money as possible. Apparently, that is not the case.

Now that everyone had signed the form, the Guild manager double checked it to make sure everything was correct and nodded. Stamping the form in the top corner he smiled, “Alright, with this everything is now settled. I will make sure that the other party is compensated, so please let me know if anyone attempts any funny business,” the Guild manager warned them, “Oh, please remember that repayments are due at the end of every month!”

“We will, thank you!” Nadine bowed respectfully and led them out of the office and back downstairs.

Before the three adventurers had a chance to make trouble, Celia immediately ambushed Emelia “Hey, sell me the Ogre!” She demanded.

Emelia backed hurriedly away and hid behind Clarice.

“Name your price!” Celia insisted, pursuing Emelia with complete disregard for Clarice’s personal space.

“Oi get off!” Clarice huffed, shoving back Celia uncomfortably.

“Tim isn’t for sale!” Emelia stated, less intimidated with Clarice serving as a buffer between them.

“Ms Celia!” The Guild manager declared aghast at the spectacle, “You will stop harassing the Guild’s adventurers this instant! Behave with decorum befitting your position in this office or I shall inform headquarters of your non-compliance!”

Celia hissed and backed off, “I was just offering to buy-”

The Guild manager cut her off mid-sentence, “Not another word! Please return to your office at once!”

Celia looked like she had plenty of unpleasant things to say, but kept her mouth shut and stalked away.

“We should go take a short break at the inn,” Nadine suggested and led them outside.

Going back to the inn, the three of them took seats and the table while I sat down with Toofy on a nearby bench by a window.

“So what is the plan?” Clarice asked, removing her helmet for the first time since I had met her, revealing her short red hair and fierce green eyes.

Nadine drummed her fingers on the table while she thought about it, “Hrm, well, we can’t hunt any more Vrabbits for a few days until the smell wears off. So maybe we could try hunting Goblins near the edge of the forest? But that is still somewhat dangerous with our equipment at the moment.”

“We have Tim to keep us safe though! So we should be fine right?!” Emelia insisted.

I was surprised that Emelia was in such a rush to go back into the forest after what happened last time. Then again, she was rather impulsive. Maybe Emelia considered what happened to be worth it? Now that was a scary thought.

“We can’t just rely on Tim to keep us safe,” Clarice interjected, “What if more than just that one Orc shows up? We can’t just hope they all attack Tim.”

“But didn’t you level up? Can’t you fight an Orc yet?” Emelia asked, visibly disappointed.

“Krk, hey! I only went up one level! Swordsmen aren’t expected to fight Orcs until at least level five you know!” Clarice bristled defensively.

I felt like perhaps I should say something since they were overlooking Toofy’s Bloodied condition, “Uhm?... Hey, shouldn't we do something about Toofy’s injuries?” I asked.

Nadine nodded, “Maybe we should leave Tim and Toofy at the inn and do some Vrabbit hunting on our own today?”

“Yeah, better to start chipping away at that debt as soon as possible and we need to pay for our stay at the inn anyway,” Clarice agreed.

“Alright, Tim, do you think you could get Toofy cleaned up and dress her wounds if we organised a bath and some bandages?” Nadine asked.

I scratched my head nervously. I had a senior first-aid certificate, so cleaning and dressing wounds was not that big of a deal. The problem as I saw it was that Toofy was a member of the opposite sex, assumedly. Her size being close to that of a child only made it worse. “Ah, is it really alright for me to do something like that?” I asked nervously, hoping they would realise the problem without me needing to spell it out for them.

“You are both monsters, so it's fine,” Emelia waved her hand dismissively.

I couldn’t help but cringe, even though such an opinion from Emelia should have been expected.

“Ah, but no babymaking!” Emelia scolded sharply.

[Your master has given you a command.]

What the hell is wrong with this person?! How could she both understand the nature of the problem and completely disregard it?!

“We are already in debt, this is not the time to have more mouths to feed,” Emelia added sagely.

“You seriously think that I would do something like that...to Toofy?” I asked incredulously.

“Of course not!” Emelia replied in an offended tone, “I just forbid you from doing it, so how could you?”

I have no words...Is this what it feels like to have a stroke?

Clarice began laughing so hard that she fell off her chair and began rolling around on the floor.

Nadine was struggling to keep a straight face, “Ah, I will go organise for the bath and bandages,” she quickly got up and hurried over to the innkeeper while covering her mouth and trying not to laugh.

When Nadine returned a few minutes later, she was much more composed, “Everything has been arranged, so you can just wait up in your room if you like.”

“What about clothes?” I asked, Toofy was currently wearing a jumbled assortment of filthy cloth and leather scraps. To say nothing of the risk of infection, there was no telling whether the materials would even maintain basic structural integrity if I tried washing them.

“Ah...” Nadine obviously hadn’t thought of that.

“Toofy can wear some of my old clothes,” Emelia offered. Although Emelia was shorter than average, there was still a significant size discrepancy between Emelia and Toofy.

“I guess I could just roll the sleeves and use a belt?” I muttered in defeat, remembering the current money problem.

“Alright, I’ll quickly go put them in your room,” Emelia jumped up from her seat and ran off up the stairs.

“Sorry,” Nadine apologised, “But with your class skill and racial ability, you should be able to wash Toofy without getting injured. I would not be so confident if it was one of us. I hope you understand.”

I sighed and nodded, Nadine had a point. I had no trouble imagining Toofy getting at least one good bite in before Emelia remembered to command Toofy not to. Still, why did it have to be me?

Emelia returned a couple of minutes later, “Alright you can give Toofy her bath now, just no funny business!”

I hate you...

Clarice snorted and sighed contentedly, “Come on, let’s go hunt some Vrabbits before all the good hunting places are taken,” she chuckled.

“Kay,” Emelia agreed enthusiastically.

“Alright,” Nadine agreed, but before she left the inn, Nadine hung back a moment, ”Oh, I paid for three meals already, they should be brought up to the room in a few hours,” she then disappeared out the door.

I released a defeated sigh and slowly began making my way upstairs to my room. I would have been worried that Toofy was so quiet, but she had been chewing on my apron since we left the Guild office.

The innkeeper had already filled a large wooden bath with hot water by the time I entered my room. After closing the door, I pried Toofy’s teeth off my apron and put her down on the floor by the bathtub, “Alright, Toofy, you are allowed to move again but you are not allowed to leave the room, okay?”

Toofy nodded and began stretching like a cat, “Okay, Toofy do.”

I took off my apron and tunic then gave myself a quick hobo bath using my hands and towelling off with the bed blanket. I then picked up the bucket left by the innkeeper and filled it with water from the bath, setting it aside for later.

Toofy cocked her head curiously at me, “Why Tim do?”

“Ah, I was just getting myself clean,” I explained.

“Clean?” Toofy was confused, “What clean?”

Yeah, this makes sense. Given that Toofy was practically caked in grime, I should have guessed that she didn’t know about personal hygiene. “You use water to wash off dirt so you don’t get sick,” I explained.

Toofy nodded, “Okay.”

Well, that was easier than I thought it would be.

“What wash?” Toofy asked.

There it is... I sighed and tried to remind myself that Toofy wasn’t doing it on purpose, “Washing is when you rub your body with water. It gets rid of all the dirt, mud and grime.” I explained and demonstrated by washing my arms with the bathwater.

“Oh, okay,” Toofy nodded her head in understanding. She began climbing up on the nearby chair to get a better look at the bath. “Toofy go in water?” Toofy asked uncertainly.

“Yes, but you need to remove your clothes and armour first,” I insisted awkwardly.

“Oh, okay. Toofy do!” Toofy sat herself down and promptly began stripping off her assorted rags,

I looked away to give Toofy at least some small measure of privacy.

“Okay, what Toofy do?” Toofy asked, “Toofy no reach water, Toofy small!”

I guess I really have to do this... Well, at least I know that I am not a pedo or lolicon, this isn't any different to washing my own kid if I had one, right? Also, I was being forced to do this! So if it's anyone's fault, it's Emelia’s! With my ego now sufficiently protected, I turned my attention back to Toofy and reflexively looked away again.

Toofy was hanging off the chair backwards and paddling her filthy feet in the water, “Can’t reach!” Toofy began wailing in frustration, “Tim help Toofy!” She demanded.

I am going to hell. Gritting my teeth, I moved around the bath over to Toofy, lifted her off the chair and slowly lowered her into the bath.

Toofy began squirming almost immediately, “AH! TIM NO DROWN TOOFY! TOOFY GOOD! TOOFY OBEY TIM!” She shrieked and scratched at my arms like a drowning cat.

“Toofy, it’s okay. I am not drowning you, this is a bath, remember? We use the water to get clean,” I reminded her. It was understandable that she was freaking out. By my approximation, the water would be just about deep enough to reach her armpits.

“Tim promise?” Toofy sniffled miserably.

“I promise, it's all going to be alright,” I consoled her. I didn't let go until I was sure that Toofy’s feet touched the bottom. “There see? It’s a little deep, but you won't drown.”

Toofy’s little chest was still heaving as she slowly began to calm down, “Water scare Toofy,” she sniffled pitiably.

“It's okay, everyone gets scared sometimes,” I next picked up the small bristle-brush and began carefully scrubbing the grime from Toofy’s right arm and hand. Unsurprisingly, getting Toofy clean was no easy task. With so many small cuts and abrasions on Toofy’s arms and hands, I had to be incredibly careful not to aggravate her injuries further while cleaning the wounds.

The innkeeper had left soap, but I wouldn't be able to use it for anything besides Toofy’s hair. She would need to wait for her next bath before her injuries were healed enough to tolerate soap. Toofy is barely tolerating the warm water as it is.

After Cleaning Toofy’s arms, I quickly scrubbed her back, shoulders and other arm before handing her the brush, “Alright, use this brush to wash your front okay? Just like how I washed your arms.”

“Okay,” Toofy agreed with a determined expression. To her credit, she sounded like she was really doing her best. Naturally, I had turned away to give Toofy some privacy while desperately trying to think of a way to get her legs cleaned without being damned to hell. In the end, I just had to hope that soaking in the warm water would dislodge the worst of the filth on its own.

“Toofy done!” Toofy declared proudly.

I swear that I only turned back out of habit! “Ah okay Toofy, let’s try and get your face cleaned up next okay?”

Toofy bit her lip and indeed reluctantly, “Kay.”

I could understand why Toofy was reluctant, there was no avoiding pain now. The large cut down the right side of Toofy’s face would need to be thoroughly cleaned to make sure she did not get a major infection and lose her eye. “This will hurt, but you have to be brave okay Toofy?”

Toofy nodded and fidgeted uncomfortably.

I was regretting not asking for painkillers, assuming of course that they had any. I then thought of something that may at least take her mind off the pain a little. Unbuckling my belt, I folded it over and held it in front of Toofy’s mouth, “Here Toofy, bite down on this. It should help a little with the pain.”

Toofy didn’t even hesitate, snapping her jaws down on the belt in a blur of teeth.

“Ready?” I asked, taking a deep breath to steel my nerve. The thought of deliberately hurting Toofy was barely made tolerable by the fact that I would be helping her.

Toofy nodded and began enthusiastically chewing on the belt. It wasn't what I had intended, but it seemed to make her happy.

I cleaned away the grime from the parts of Toofy’s face and neck before finishing with the right side. I put the brush away and did this part by hand. I tore off a small section of linen bandage and soaked it in the clean water before gently dabbing at the cut, rinsing the cloth off in the bathwater, before wringing it out and wetting it with the cleaner water from the bucket. I lost track of how long it took in the end, but eventually Toofy’s face and cut were clean, albeit bleeding slightly. While cleaning Toofy’s eyelid I was relieved to find that her right eye was actually relatively unharmed, merely bruised and slightly inflamed.

“Alright Toofy, we are almost done now, I just need to clean your hair. I need you to keep your head tilted back and your eyes tightly shut okay? You really don't want soap in your eyes,'' I explained as I tilted Toofy’s head back and began cupping bathwater into her hair. Toofy’s hair has more twigs in it than most bird nests I've seen, so after wetting her greasy tangled mess, I had to slowly remove the broken twigs and painstakingly untangle the seemingly infinite number of knots. Only after all of this did I dare introduce soap.

With how greasy Toofy’s hair had made my hands, it was a pleasant relief to feel that sensation subside as the lathered soap stripped it away. To take care of the remaining knots, I had to resort to using the bristle brush to gingerly comb through Toofy’s hair. To her credit, Toofy didn’t complain once during the whole ordeal. Then again, she did have a belt in her mouth.

“Arms out of the water Toofy,” I warned before slowly and carefully rinsing the soap from Toofy’s hair. I made sure not to use all of the water set aside in the bucket, because I still needed some of it to clean the small cuts on Toofy’s arms after removing her from the bath. “Alright, time to come out, Toofy,” I picked her up from behind and set her down by the bath while doing my best not to look anywhere I shouldn’t. Retrieving the bedroll Nadine had left in my room, I discreetly wrapped it around Toofy just under her armpits to help her dry off.

With Toofy happily chewing away at my belt and the issue of my eternal damnation experiencing a desperately needed reprieve, I began cleaning Toofy’s arms in preparation for the bandages. Bandaging Toofy’s arms was actually rather simple. The injuries that could benefit from the protection were all limited to her forearms, so it was a simple matter of wrapping them securely and tucking in the edges.

The cut on Toofy’s face was trickier. In the end, I had to settle for making a headband, wadding some bandages, then pinning it to the injured area while looping another band of bandages diagonally around her head and using the headband to help stop it from slipping. It was far from perfect, but it was the best I could do without pins or at the very least a needle and thread.

Turning my attention to the clothes Emelia had donated, I quickly realised that my earlier assumption was correct. With no other alternatives, I rolled up the sleeves on the tunic and trousers. “Alright Toofy, it's time to get dressed again, arms up,” I put the tunic on her first, for obvious reasons, then removed the damp bedroll and helped Toofy into the trousers. I cinched the trousers around her waist with a leftover bandage and roughly tied a second over the top of the tunic in the same place to stop it billowing about with every breeze through the window. Even so, the tunic almost reached the floor and was more like a mumu or robe.

“There, feel better?” I asked with no small measure of pride for a job well done.

Toofy nodded and continued gnawing at the belt.

Rolling my eyes, I picked Toofy up and put her down on the bed. Having her wounds cleaned and dressed was probably a tiring experience, so I think it will be best if she at least took a nap. “You can take a short sleep if you want Toofy, I will wake you up when there is food, okay?”

Toofy nodded emphatically, drool running down her chin as she made herself comfortable and fell asleep almost the instant her head touched the pillow.

Sighing and shaking my head, I took a closer look at the rags Toofy had stripped off earlier. If it weren't for our current state of poverty and my current loss of smell, I would not have been nearly so bold. Toofy’s armour appeared to be made from discarded and damaged pieces of leather armour crudely tied together with plant fibre cords through holes bored by Toofy’s shiv. I could only assume that it held no real value. Similarly, the rags Toofy had been wearing as clothes were completely unredeemable, most of them fell apart in my fingers at the slightest pressure.

The only things of note amongst Toofy’s belongings was her small iron shiv and silver belt buckle. It had been tied to a cord-like she was wearing it as a necklace. It was obvious that Toofy valued it enough to keep it, so I didn’t want to take it from her. Washing the plant cord and silver belt buckle as much as I could manage, I left them on the bed by Toofy to dry. I wonder if Toofy ate the belt that it came from, after all, she really seems to like chewing on leather.

After a short while, there was a knock at the door and the innkeeper entered with three bowls of stew on a sturdy wooden tray. He put the tray down on the foot of the bed and looked over at the bathtub and sighed.

“I’m sorry, she was pretty dirty you see,” I apologised.

The innkeeper looked at me in surprise, “Ah, no, it’s fine,” he replied a little strangely. Using the bucket, he then began bailing the bathwater out the window.

I suppose it’s a reasonable expectation since this room doesn't look out onto the street and repeatedly walking up and down the stairs would be quite tiring. Just bailing the water out the window was still visibly tiring the middle-aged man out.

“I can help if you want,” I offered. It was never a bad idea to be in the good graces of local businesses. I pulled on my tunic, now that I had well and truly dried off.

“Oh, erm, sure,” the innkeeper agreed a little breathlessly.

Nodded and lifted the bathtub, it was still about half full but I didn’t feel overburdened. Carefully walking over to the window, I made sure to disturb the bathwater first to dislodge the filth and then threw the remaining water out the window in one go. “Would you like me to carry the bathtub back downstairs for you?” I asked helpfully.

“Alright," the innkeeper agreed thankfully.

“Okay, just a moment please,” I put down the bathtub and gently shook Toofy awake, “Toofy, wake up, the food is here.”

Toofy’s one good eye immediately flashed open, “Food?!” Toofy asked excitedly, sniffing eagerly at the air.

I pointed at the tray with three bowls of stew, “These are for you. Make sure not to spill any and no biting or breaking the bowls or tray, understand?”

Toofy nodded emphatically but stopped suddenly, “What, tray?”

I chuckled and tapped the wooden tray, “This is a tray Toofy,” I explained patiently.

“Oooh," Toofy nodded her head sagely for a moment before growing sombre, “What Tim eat?”

I shook my head, “I am not hungry yet, this is all for Toofy.”

“Okay, Toofy eat!" Toofy sniffled, a tear running down her left cheek as she lifted the first bowl and began gulping the stew down.

Picking up the bathtub again, “I will be back in a little bit, so behave, okay Toofy?”

Toofy nodded, too occupied with licking her first bowl clean to speak.

“Ah, alright, this way please,” the innkeeper motioned for me to follow him downstairs.

Making sure to close the door, to reduce Toofy’s temptation to explore, I followed the innkeeper downstairs, through the kitchen area and out the back. This small walled-off courtyard served as a laundry area, with lines of clothes and bedsheets drying on one side. On the other side was an old fashioned pump, a small stack of similarly sized bathtubs and a middle-aged woman currently engaged in washing more sheets against a washboard.

“Should I rinse out the tub with the pump?” I asked.

The innkeeper looked surprised and nodded. After overhearing Nadine's description of typical levels of monster intelligence, he was rather well justified in that opinion.

Rinsing out the tub thoroughly, I stacked it back with the others and was going to head back to my room when the innkeeper called out to me “W-wait.”

I stopped and wondered if I had accidentally done something wrong.

“Would you be interested in doing some work around the inn? More like chores really, but we are short-staffed at the moment and expecting a large number of new adventurers to enter this floor of the Labyrinth soon,” the innkeeper explained hurriedly.

The innkeeper’s wife frowned somewhat and gave her husband a questioning look.

“Maybe,” I agreed tentatively, “But I need to bring Toofy with me so I can keep an eye on her.”

The innkeeper looked relieved, “That should not be a problem. Most of our rooms are empty at the moment.”

“Alright,” I agreed amiably, “What would you like me to do?”

As it turns out, the innkeeper and his wife had fallen very far behind on schedule and had not had a break in days. Every room in the inn was due for a floor scrubbing, including the common room and kitchen. There was a substantial backlog of laundry as well, which the innkeeper's wife was stoically chipping away at.

Able to manhandle around the furniture, I decided that given how early in the day it was, I would start with scrubbing floors. I really didn’t mind it all that much, my new thick skin seemed to stop my knees from getting sore and Toofy’s endless barrage of questions and child-like observations kept my mind otherwise occupied.

The entire ground floor was made of stone, so it was very easy to get clean and didn’t take me long at all. The innkeeper said he would handle mopping up the small puddles of water, so I could move on to the upstairs floors. Although a little more tedious, because I had to mop up the water with a rag as I went, it still wasn’t that bad with Toofy for company.

After cleaning all the floors, it was hardly past midday, which seemed ridiculous to me at first. But my increased strength really did seem to make scrubbing the floor incredibly easy, so I suppose that's why it didn’t take very long.

Helping the innkeeper’s wife with the laundry, she was sceptical at first, but really didn’t seem to mind the extra help. I was by no means as good at it as she was, so I handled the sheets, while the innkeeper's wife washed the clothes. After a while, I seemed to figure out the trick and began making decent headway.

One of the reasons why the innkeeper's wife didn't complain was because I could wring water from the sheets to the point that they were very nearly dry. This saved a great deal of space on the laundry lines and sped up the drying process. We finished the last of the washing early in the evening.

“Thank you for your hard work,” the innkeeper said gratefully, “Please, for your trouble,” he offered me a wooden tray with two bowls of stew and three copper coins.

“Ah, thank you, but is this okay?” I asked, not wanting to get the innkeeper in trouble with his wife. Each meal was worth a copper coin, and copper coins seemed to have a great deal of purchasing power in this feudal economy.

“It is alright,” the innkeeper smiled, “My wife insists that you be paid for your work and this is what we pay the maids who usually help with the work, so it is fine.”

“Oh, alright then,” I agreed, happily accepting the tray, “Let’s go back to our room to eat. Come on Toofy.”

Smelling food, Toofy eagerly scrambled along behind me, “Toofy eat!” she declared eagerly.

I had worked up a little appetite, so I ate one bowl of stew and left the other two for Toofy. Besides her injuries, I had noticed that Toofy was also somewhat malnourished, so hopefully, this extra kickstart of nutrients would help her bounce back and recover faster.

Having quickly polished off her own two meals, Toofy looked curiously at the copper coins, “Shinies,” she whispered, her good eye fixated on the coins like a magpie. Toofy was about to pounce on the copper coins but stopped herself at the last moment. Toofy gave me a guilty look and stiffly sat back down, “Toofy no steal Tim’s shinies...”

Toofy looked so disappointed, I let out a sigh and gave her one of the copper coins, “Here, this is for you,” Toofy’s distracting presence had made cleaning the inn more bearable, so I didn’t feel too bad giving her just one of the coins as compensation.

Tears welled in Toofy’s good eye as she accepted the copper coin with trembling fingers, “Tim give Toofy shiny?” She sniffled, rubbing away dribbling snot from her nose with the folded sleeve of Emelia’s old tunic. “Tim good, help Toofy. Toofy give Tim shiny’s!”

It was hard to understand Toofy sometimes, “No you can keep the coin Toofy, it’s yours,” I insisted.

Toofy shook her head, “Not coin. Toofy’s home, many shiny’s hide!”

I didn't quite understand what Toofy said at first, but then I remembered the primary cause for the current situation. According to Nadine, monsters had four possible sources of value. First, was experience to level up. Second, was the mana stone embedded in each monster’s head, which could be sold for money. Third was the monsters body parts, also able to be sold for money used to make weapons, armour and potions. Lastly, higher difficulty monsters carried their own equipment and hoarded treasure like dragons from fairytales.

Even though Toofy’s personal equipment was admittedly garbage, the description of her scavenger class ability meant it was possible that she had a hidden treasure hoard, reconsidering the words Toofy had used from her limited vocabulary, that seemed to be the case. “Toofy, are you saying you have a hidden stash of items?” I asked for confirmation.

Toofy looked a little confused as she took a moment to puzzle out the meaning of what I had said before answering, “Yes! Toofy hide many shiny’s. Toofy hide shiny’s under tree, hide from Grobguk!”

“Grobguk?” I asked, it sounded like gibberish but I had to be sure.

Toofy nodded with a dour expression on her face, “Grobguk big Orc, scare Toofy, steal Toofy’s shiny’s! So Toofy find tree, tree hide Shiny’s, hide Toofy from Grobguk!”

Ah, that made more sense. The larger monster was bullying her, so Toofy hid herself and her treasures in a tree. “Did those adventurers find the tree?” I asked, hoping Toofy knew who I was talking about.

Toofy vigorously shook her head, “Bad humans hide, attack Toofy foraging. Toofy scared, run far. Ground biters chase Toofy! Toofy fall, hurt, sad. Toofy no want die, Tim save Toofy! Toofy like Tim!” Toofy’s voice and expressions started angry and bitter, then became scared and then finally grateful.

I felt touched, “I like you too Toofy,” I ruffled Toofy’s hair. It was nice to have some company and in a more selfish sense, to have someone else besides me in the same situation. Although I had known Toofy less than a single day, her near guileless childlike personality made me feel like maybe I had a little sister. “Alright, we can talk more about it later. You should sleep until dinner time, okay? You still need to recover.”

“Okay,” Toofy yawned and curled up on the bed before promptly falling asleep.

The evening was a little chilly and since I didn't have a lantern or even candles, I needed to keep the window open for light. To ward off the chill, I doubled over the blanket and covered Toofy with it. I had never really minded the cold myself, probably because of my extra layer of insulating body fat I suppose.

Not too much later, I heard Clarice grumbling and groaning downstairs, “Ugh, I am sooo tired! I need a bath!”

“I need one too!” Emelia complained, “I’m so sweaty!”

“Share?!” Clarice demanded incredulously, most likely in response to Nadine. “Fine!” Clarice began stomping up the stairs grumbling loudly under her breath as she passed Tim’s door.

A couple of minutes later, there was a knock at the door and Nadine entered the room, “Good evening Tim,” she wearily waved in greeting before sitting down on the chair and letting out a tired sigh.

“Good evening,” I replied.

“How is Toofy doing?” Nadine asked with obvious concern. Understandable, considering she had taken a loan to keep Toofy after all.

“Better. The cut didn’t go deep enough to permanently injure her eye and I made sure to clean everything thoroughly before applying bandages.” That reminds me, “Is there an antiseptic, or salve I can put on the cuts to stop them getting infected?” I asked.

Nadine grimaced uncomfortably, “There is, but they are too expensive for us right now I am afraid.” She shook her head apologetically. “We need to save every copper until we get that loan paid off, or at least get a month ahead on the scheduled repayment.”

I nodded, it was pretty much what I expected, “How much does a needle and some thread cost?” I asked.

Nadine hadn’t expected that particular question and took a moment to reply, “I think you can buy a packet of needles and a cheap spool of thread from the tailor for a copper each, why?”

I shrugged, “The bandaging on Toofy’s face would fit better if I could sew some of the bandages together. I could also alter Toofy’s clothes to fit better. Just a couple of ideas,” I explained.

Nadine shook her head, “As I said Tim, we can't make any extra purchases right now.”

“Ah, I know. It’s okay, I understand,” I explained hurriedly, “I did some work for the innkeeper today and he paid me a couple of coins is all.”

“Oh?” Nadine looked curious, “What is it that he had you do?”

I shrugged, “Just scrubbing floors and helping his wife with the laundry. It really wasn’t that hard.”

“So that’s why the floors look so clean,” Nadine commented while nodding her head thoughtfully. “You really didn’t mind doing that kind of work?” She asked a little apprehensively.

I nodded, “It’s fine. I had to keep an eye on Toofy anyway, so I decided to spend my time productively.”

Nadine was a little surprised but nodded in understanding, “Would you mind doing some other jobs around the foothold?” She asked tentatively.

I shrugged, “It depends on the job. I really don't mind doing most things.” It was true, I worked a number of temp jobs and part-time jobs over the years to put myself through school and had done a little bit of everything.

“Tim, would it be alright if I arranged for you to do some jobs while we are hunting Vrabbits tomorrow?” Nadine asked.

I nodded, “So long as it is something I can do, then it should be fine,” I agreed amiably. Even though I probably wouldn’t see much benefit personally from working these jobs, the earnings will probably go towards paying off the loan sooner anyway. I was a little surprised that Nadine had not asked for the two copper coins.

“Euuuf,” Nadine exhaled with an unladylike grunt as she unsteadily got back to her feet, “I have already paid for three meals. The Innkeeper should deliver them soon. I will see you tomorrow morning Tim,” she wearily walked out the door and towards the room she shared with Clarice and Emelia.

Just as Nadine said, the innkeeper arrived a couple of minutes later with three bowls of stew on a new tray. “Here you go,” he announced hurriedly, placing it down on the bed and swapping it out for the tray with three empty bowls.

I had already moved the two remaining copper coins into the pocket of my leather apron, so there was nothing to worry about in that regard.

“Ah, would you mind helping with the baths again? Five baths need filling. I do not think my back is up for it and my wife is busy tending the fire. I can give you a copper coin for the trouble,” the Innkeeper offered.

“Alright,” I agreed happily, “But can I ask something first?”

“Go ahead,” the innkeeper agreed, now looking much less stressed than a few moments earlier.

“How much do you charge for a bath?” I asked. Bathing was important, so knowing the price would help me decide how regularly I would theoretically afford to do so going forward.

“We charge only a single copper during most seasons, but in winter we have to charge twice as much to cover the increased cost of firewood,” the innkeeper explained honestly.

“Okay, I will come down once Toofy and I have eaten the stew,” I smiled as I noticed Toofy’s nose wrinkling and her nostrils flaring as she smelled the nearby food.

“Thank you,” the innkeeper promptly left to see to his work.

“Toofy wake up,” I gave Toofy a gentle jostling, “The food is here.”

“Food!” Toofy was up and scrambling over the blanket in no time.

“Okay, these two are for you and this one is for me,” I explained quickly, taking my bowl of stew and drinking it down with gusto. I really wasn’t all that hungry, but since waking up in this strange place, whenever I start to eat, I suddenly feel famished. Without the willpower I had honed over years of strict dieting, there is no way I would be able to stop at one bowl of this delicious stew,

In no time flat, Toofy had eaten both her bowls of stew and licked clean all three of our bowls, rubbing her stomach with a look of contentment.

“Alright, I need to work again, so I need you to be on your best behaviour,” I explained quickly while putting on my leather apron.

“Okay!” Toofy agreed, snatching my belt from the bed and climbing into the apron pocket.

I was a little surprised that Toofy had guessed at my intention without needing to be asked. I had planned on stowing her in the pocket to keep her out of trouble, albeit without my belt, but this was fine too I guess.

With Toofy gnawing happily on the belt, I quickly made my way downstairs and the innkeeper directed me to the kitchen. They heated water for the baths by boiling water in a very large kettle over their large fireplace. While the innkeeper’s wife was busy, she gave me quick directions and a handful of keys. I didn’t need to know how to read for this job, which was a relief. I just had to bring a bath to each of the rooms with doors matching symbols to the wooden tag on each of the provided keys. Straightforward enough, I went out the back and made a stack of five bathtubs. Heading upstairs, I then delivered one to each room after knocking to make sure the room was unoccupied. I made sure to lock the doors behind myself before returning for the next step. Thankfully, the inn had a larger bucket than the one I had used earlier to rinse Toofy’s hair. Well, technically it was a barrel with handles, but whatever.

I could carry enough hot water in one trip that the innkeeper had to let the adventurer know their bath would be ready much sooner than expected. Not that either of them minded. Once I returned for the required cold water from the pump, I made sure to grab one of the buckets as well. After filling the bathtub most of the way, but making sure the water was still hot, I filled the bucket with cold water and left it by the bath. On my way out of the room, I nearly knocked down the adventurer who was returning for their bath. I apologised and left him standing there clutching a small bar of soap with a stunned expression on his face.

“That was fast!” The innkeeper congratulated me as I refilled the kettle with fresh water from the pump outside.

“Thank you,” I replied, a little embarrassed. I wasn’t used to receiving praise, it was nice.

The innkeeper's wife nodded in agreement, “He is very hardworking and diligent. If he was not a monster, I would have introduced him to our Millie!” She chuckled, adding dough dumplings to the large stew pot.

I just smiled vaguely at the intended compliment.

As a favour to the girls, I made their bath the next one I would prepare. Clarice, Emelia and Nadine were all surprised when I knocked on the door and entered their room. I had already seen their room earlier when scrubbing the floors and it was pretty much the same as mine, except it was a little bigger and had a much larger bed. It wasn’t just because they were trying to save money either, Apparently sharing a bed was common in this world.

“Eh, why is Tim here?” Emelia asked, apparently oblivious to the large barrel of steaming water I was using to fill the bath.

Clarice rolled her eyes and continued eating her dinner.

Nadine appeared to have already finished her dinner and was dosing face-down on the bed, still fully clothed in her adventuring outfit.

“I am preparing the bath,” I explained, pouring the last of the water into the tub, “I will be back in a couple of minutes with the cold water.”

“Huh?” Emelia looked expectantly at Clarice.

True to my word, I returned shortly afterwards with the cold water and bucket. “How hot do you want the water?” I asked politely.

Clarice shrugged, “Pretty hot, but not too much,” she replied unhelpfully.

I sighed and slowly began pouring in the cold water, “Is this about right?” I asked.

Clarice dipped her fingers in the water, “Colder,” she declared with dissatisfaction.

I poured in more cold water, “How about now?”

Clarice tested the water again, “Colder,” she repeated.

We continued this back and forth until the bathwater was barely lukewarm.

“This will do,” Clarice shrugged, waving me away dismissively.

I frowned. From what I overheard earlier, the three of them were going to share this bath and rather than taking a turn later when the water had cooled, Clarice was selfishly going first and pretty much guaranteed Emelia and Nadine would be left with cold bathwater.

I kept my complaints to myself and returned downstairs to prepare the water for the next person’s bath.

“Something the matter?” The innkeeper’s wife asked.

“Kind of?” I shrugged, not really sure what complaining would accomplish.

The innkeeper’s wife stopped what she was doing and looked at me with an expectant expression.

I released an uncomfortable sigh, “Clarice, one of my owners I guess, is taking the first bath and wanted the water cooled to the point that it will be well and truly cold by the time the other two have a chance to use it.” I explained, “I know, it’s petty and stupid, but the others are pretty worn out, you know?”

Far from being dismissive as I had expected her to be, the innkeeper’s wife was nodding with a conflicted expression, “I have heard many things of Clarice from other adventurers. She is certainly difficult, to say the least.” She agreed, “But the solution in this particular instance is simple. Just empty out the cold bathwater later and replace it with hot water again.”

“Ah, we don’t really have the funds for that right now, that is why they were meant to be sharing,” I hurriedly explained.

The innkeeper’s wife smirked, “I assumed as much, but you misunderstood me. I was not intending to charge you for the water.”

“Oh, uhm, is that alright though?” I asked nervously. They were running a business after all and needed to earn a profit.

“It’s fine,” the innkeeper’s wife reassured me, “Since you are already helping my husband and I, boiling water while the fireplace is still lit costs us nothing.”

“Thank you,” I smiled and bowed appreciatively.

The innkeeper's wife waved off my thanks with a smile and returned to her work.

While returning from filling the final bath, I heard Emelia’s muffled voice from down the hall.

“Clarice! The bath is ice cold! Why did you take so long!” She demanded, her voice filled with the pain of betrayal.

“Should have eaten your dinner faster,” Clarice retorted unsympathetically.

“Clarice!” Nadine growled menacingly, "That was meant to be for all of us!”

Knowing things were coming to a head, I knocked on the door.

There was the sound of a brief scuffle and then Emelia opened the door, “Hell-oh, hi Tim. Are you taking the bath back?”

I shook my head, “I am going to replace the water,” I explained, filling the barrel from the bathtub.

“Oh wow! Really?! Thanks, Tim!” Emelia pumped her fist in the air as if posing in triumph.

“Ah, Tim? Is that really allowed? You know you can't just do things without asking,” Nadine asked worriedly.

“It's okay, the innkeeper’s wife gave me permission,” I replied happily.

Nadine looked somewhat surprised, “Oh, Rose? That’s really sweet of her.”

“It will only be while the fireplace is still lit, so the next person shouldn’t take too long or the last person will miss out,” I clarified, just to make sure there aren’t any misunderstandings.

Nadine nodded, “Alright, thanks Tim,” she smiled appreciatively.

“You’re welcome,” I gave Nadine a nod and then left the room with the barrel of cold bathwater.

“Please, please, please, please let me go next Nadine?!” Emelia immediately began begging before I even managed to close the door.

Emptying the bathwater outside, I filled the barrel back up again with boiling water and took it upstairs. Emelia was already waiting expectantly wearing only a towel. Since I was now adding boiling water to the cold water left in the tub there was no real temperature control anymore. If it was too hot, Emelia would just have to wait for it to cool somewhat first. Thankfully, Clarice had only used half the bucket of water, so it should be fine for Emelia.

Leaving them to it, I went back downstairs to prepare the water for the final bath. Toofy had fallen asleep again, so I was taking my time and making sure not to wake her up.

The inn’s common room was pretty busy, more than half the tables were filled with adventurers noisily eating, drinking and chatting with one another. While I got some attention, it wasn’t nearly so much as I initially expected. I have to assume that given my current clothes and that I appeared to be working at the inn, people were not paying close enough attention to tell I was different.

Since I had nothing else to do for a while, I chatted idly with the innkeeper’s wife Rose. It was mostly just idle gossip of no real consequence, but it helped me get a better idea of the differences in this world. Most notably, it was a bit of a shock to find out that people were considered adults at the age of sixteen and were considered strange if they were not married by their early twenties. As a result, many adventurers are quite young. The allure of easy money in the Labyrinth ensured a constant stream of young people hoping to strike it rich. Unfortunately, the Labyrinths had a truly horrifying mortality rate.

According to Rose, Only one in ten adventurers would reach the fifth floor of the Labyrinth. Some would give up and seek a normal life, but many simply died because they were not strong enough to survive. The death toll tapered off at the higher floors, but it was not because of lower difficulty. The rate of fatalities decreased because the adventurers too weak or foolish to survive were already dead.

Rose had been curious about my obviously human level of intelligence, but didn’t press the issue when I mentioned that Nadine had called me a named monster. I don’t know if she believed that or not, but she stopped asking questions about it.

After about an hour of chatting with Rose, I filled a bucket from the pump outside and then took both the filled bucket and empty barrel upstairs. No one answered when I knocked on the door, so I used the key to get in. The girls had all fallen asleep and the small candle on a plate by the window had blown out.

Using the light from the lantern mounted in the hall, I placed the bucket by the bathtub, then filled the barrel from the tub and submerged the empty bucket in the barrel. Quietly moving over to Nadine, I gently shook her awake.

“Nng, huh? Wha? T-tim?” Nadine blearily blinked her eyes in confusion, her face plastered with her long auburn hair.

“I was about to refill the bath if you still wanted to use it,” I explained hastily before she had a chance to misunderstand the situation.

“Huh?... Oh, thanks Tim,” Nadine seemed quite tired and sore, barely managing to sit up as I left the room.

Returning a couple of minutes later, I found Nadine wearing a towel and sitting on the edge of the bed. She perked up a little upon seeing the steam rising from the barrel.

Emptying the barrel into the bathtub, I then turned to leave Nadine to enjoy her bath.

“W-wait” Nadine called out before I could close the door.

I stopped and turned back.

Nadine’s cheeks flushed, “Could you help me into the bath?” She asked quietly, “My muscles are too stiff.”

I didn’t trust my voice not to crack, so I just nodded. Going back into the room, I closed the door behind me and tried to ignore the intimate setting provided by the weak candlelight.

Letting Nadine pull herself up with my arm, I supported her over to the bathtub and realised that I would have to be more proactive. Gulping down my saliva, I lifted Nadine by the waist with both hands and sat her down on the rim of the tub.

“Ahhhh! Thanks, Tim, the hot water feels so good on my tired feet,” Nadine sighed in relief, “Uhm, could you stay? Ah! I mean, I am quite tired and I don’t want to drown in the tub! Since Emelia and Clarice are already asleep...Could you stay?”

Thankful that my flushed cheeks were not visible in this poor lighting, I nodded and carefully sat down near the bathtub but making sure to face towards the wall to give Nadine her privacy. I heard Nadine remove her towel and slowly lower herself into the water.

“Ahhhhhhhhh,” Nadine moaned in pleasure.

Is she doing this on purpose? Nadine has to know what she sounds like, right? I gulped and tried to keep my mind off of the scene behind me.

There was the sound of disturbed water and then a wet slapping sound that spattered me some stray droplets. Puzzling over what happened, it took me a moment before I realised that she must have just whipped her wet hair.

We didn't say anything to one another for the next half hour or so. Nadine just made suggestive moans and moved about in the water while I remained silent.

“Ah, Tim?” Nadine asked sleepily.

“Y-yeah?” I replied, clearing my throat to keep my voice even.

“I am ready to get out now. Could you bring me Emelia or Clarice’s towel?” Nadine asked.

“Alright,” I did my best to keep my eyes averted and picked up one of the damp towels. I then held out the towel so Nadine could take it.

“Thank you,” Nadine gratefully accepted the towel and then there were more sounds of moving water. “Ah, Tim, you can turn around now."

I slowly turned around and found that Nadine had wrapped herself in Emelia’s towel, thoroughly soaking it through, but at least covering herself. Of course, the wet towel was clinging to her body and left so little to the imagination that I reflexively glanced away again in embarrassment.

“Can you help me out of the bath?” Nadine asked tiredly, “I still need to dry off and I am struggling to stay awake.”

I nodded and let her take hold of my arm, then I pulled her up out of the water. Almost like my subconscious activated latent telekinetic abilities, or perhaps because of physics, the soaked towel fell off Nadine’s body and disappeared into the depths of the tub. Was heaven rewarding me at long last? Was this the reward for so righteously denying despicable temptation? Honestly, I think I might cry.

Nadine just stood there, still clinging to my arm and intensely staring down at the bathwater as if she were trying to determine where her towel had disappeared to, or maybe whether this was a bad dream.

After thoroughly getting an eyeful and etching the image onto my very soul, I managed to find a shred of remaining decency and reluctantly looked away. Nadine’s original and still dry towel was within arms reach on the bed, so I snatched it and almost knocked Nadine over trying to hand it to her.

Nadine made a sort of squeaking noise and snatched the towel with one hand, while furiously digging her nails into my arm with the other, or at least she tried to. She used my arm to keep her balance and shakily got out of the bath before letting go of my arm.

Certain that nothing good could come of lingering further, I picked up the barrel, left the room, locked the door and disappeared downstairs. I was so shaken up that I very nearly woke up Toofy when going down the stairs.

Kirk the innkeeper looked at me strangely, “Is something wrong?” He asked probingly.

I shook my head and blushed.

Kirk crossed his arms and smirked, “Alright, fess up. What happened?” He demanded jokingly.

“The towel slipped...” I muttered quietly, ducking into the kitchen before he could ask further questions.

After returning the barrel and bucket to where they belonged, I hastily made my way back to my room before Kirk or his wife Rose could ask any follow-up questions. Trying to remove Toofy from the apron pocket, I met with little success. Toofy even stopped sucking on the leather belt long enough to bite me on a particularly poor attempt. Like a cat that had found the perfect place to take a nap, there was no dislodging Toofy without risking hurting her in the attempt.

Left with little choice, I had to leave Toofy be. This was unfortunate because I just realised the door to my room was currently left unlocked. Since the only way to get a key to lock it would be to either go and ask Nadine or the innkeeper to lock the door, I resigned myself to sleep in front of the door instead. Relying on my bulk to keep the door securely shut through the night, or at least wake me up if someone tried entering, I slowly fell asleep.

I woke up to find Toofy jumping up and down on my stomach and had the impression that this may have been going on for a while judging by the mild level of discomfort. So relying on being shoved by a door may have been unrealistic.

“Toofy huuuungry!” Toofy declared listlessly as she continued jumping, apparently unaware that I had already woken up.

How could Toofy be hungry already after eating so much yesterday? I wondered. Wait a minute! Judging by the fact that I kind of felt like I needed to pee, which was briefly intensified each time Toofy landed on my stomach, I was forced to consider the very real possibility that Toofy was almost definitely not toilet trained.

Snatching up a surprised Toofy, I leapt to my feet and bolted down the stairs to one of the inn’s toilets. Thankfully Toofy was too surprised to react. Little more than well-ventilated drop toilets, I suddenly noticed a very real problem. The hole in the seat was too big...

“Tim?” Toofy asked in understandable confusion given the circumstances.

It only now occurred to me how lucky I am that Toofy didn’t soil herself in fright earlier. Given how much stew she ate yesterday, she must be positively bursting.

“Ah, Toofy. You probably need to relieve yourself right?” I asked.

Toofy stared back at me uncomprehendingly.

I was starting to get really worried that I would need to clean up Goblin piss or worse, “You know, pee? Poop?”

“Pee? Poop?” Toofy asked, obviously confused.

I tried not to panic, “You know, it comes out, down there,” I pointed at her groin.

Realisation dawned on Toofy’s face, “Oh!” her expression suddenly became troubled and she nodded, “Toofy poop!” Toofy began scrambling to get away.

"Gah Toofy! Poop goes in the hole,” I pointed to the hole in the board and left with no other options, pulled down her trousers and hiked up her tunic. I was barely in time.

Dangling precariously over the hole, Toofy released an unholy abomination that I am forever grateful to be unable to smell. From what I was hearing alone, her diet before being captured by Emelia must have been awful.

I didn’t dare lift Toofy away from the hole until I was absolutely certain she was finished. Thank god for what has to be the most amazing and miraculous existence in this crazy world, dawnmoss. Thoroughly absorbent, odour suppressing and rapid growing, dawnmoss was this world's substitute for toilet paper. I had my doubts initially, but after using it yesterday, I have to say that it is better in just about every conceivable way. Rose even claimed that adventurers sometimes forget emergency rations, but never forget to pack a few pounds of fresh dawnmoss. That’s how big a deal it is.

Taking a small clump of dawnmoss from the bucket nearby, I gingerly give Toofy’s behind a once over before dropping it down the toilet and handing her a piece, “You use this to clean yourself after a poop,” I explained.

Toofy rolled her good eye at me, ”Toofy know! Not idiot!” She sighed indignantly, snatching the dawnmoss and cleaning herself before glancing at me uncertainly and throwing it down the toilet as I had done.

Crisis averted. “Sorry Toofy, I don’t think you're an idiot,” I apologised.

Toofy pursed her lips and shrugged, “Okay, Toofy forgive Tim.”

The dawnmoss was amazing for another reason as well, the jelly-like sap inside the moss has antibacterial properties and was harvested for a secondary form of soap. Taking up a third clump of moss, I squeezed it hard in my fist until the clear sap came out. There is a small pot of it in the corner, but I knew from what Rose told me last night that fresh is best and while the sap is cheap to purchase from the apothecary, it is not free. “Okay, let's wash our hands, get you dressed again and see what we can do about breakfast.”

Toofy didn’t look overly enthusiastic as she took a blob of sap and expertly cleaned her hands with it.

“Uh, Toofy, breakfast is a human word for food you eat in the morning,” I explained patiently.

Toofy immediately perked up upon understanding what I had intended.

I figured that may have been the case. Dropping the squished dawnmoss down the toilet, I helped Toofy back into her trousers. Taking her back out into the common room, I could tell by the amused expression on Kirk’s face that he had seen my desperate dash to the toilet.

I gave him an embarrassed shrug and led Toofy back upstairs. It was still quite early, so besides ourselves, the innkeeper Kirk and presumably his wife Rose, no one else was awake yet. Toofy was not taking things particularly well once we got back to our room with no food to show for it.

“Toofy hungry!” Toofy insisted, her lower lip trembling and one good eye watering pitiably, “Toofy dying!” She declared dramatically, falling backwards on the bed as if struck down from starvation.

This really sucked, because even though I knew Toofy was being overly dramatic and may only be a little hungry, I still felt bad that I had only a few options to resolve it. I could spend one of my three remaining coppers on a meal to tide her over, but then I probably wouldn't have enough for the sewing supplies. I could spend Toofy’s single copper on a meal, but that didn’t feel great either. All the more so, since we were technically Emelia’s responsibility and she should be taking care of this.

In that train of thought was the final option, I could wake up the girls so they would begin organising breakfast. The problem with that was of course what had happened last night. I am not too proud to admit that at this moment I am pretty damned terrified of what Nadine might do to me. I still don’t know what her class is, and after hearing from Rose what some of them are capable of, this is not the way I want to find out!

“Just be patient a little while longer Toofy. Oh, here, you can chew on my belt until the food arrives okay?” I pulled my belt out of the apron pocket where Toofy had left it.

Quick as a flash, Toofy leapt off the bed and was now hanging off the belt in my hand with her teeth. Letting go of the belt, Toofy landed on her feet but immediately leapt back up onto the bed and began rolling around.

After a few minutes, there was a knock at the door and Nadine let herself into the room. Far from the blackened wrathful expression I had expected, Nadine seemed just as nervous as I was. “Ah, Tim, I really need to talk to you.”

Toofy sprang to her feet, the belt forgotten on the bed, “Food?!”

Nadine was taken aback for a moment, “Ah, what? Oh, I'll take care of that in a minute.”

Toofy lost interest immediately, dropping back down onto the bed and resumed chewing on the belt.

Nadine smiled in bemusement at Toofy for a moment before returning her attention to me, “I want to talk to you about what happened last night.”

My mouth became dry in an instant and my imagination kicked into overdrive considering exactly how Nadine was going to kill me. Unable to speak, I mutely nodded.

“I would really appreciate it if it was kept just between us. Please don't tell Clarice or Emelia!” Nadine pleaded earnestly.

Heaven has not abandoned me! I have been given a second chance to continue living a virtuous life! Considering how I had begun my morning, it seemed only fair that things balance out this way. I nodded to show Nadine that I agreed to keep our secret.

Nadine sighed in relief, “Thank you. I don’t think I would ever have been able to live it down otherwise.”

*****

Grobguk sighed contentedly as he licked the fresh blood off his knife. The human he had captured the day before had proven very entertaining and almost as delicious. Were it not for a particular problem, Grobguk would have agreed that his life was perfect.

Unfortunately, that problem was an Ogre and it was in Grobguk’s territory. For as long as Grobguk could remember, he had been the strongest monster in the territory. Anyone that dared to so much as look him in the eye would be hacked to pieces as an example, and Grobguk’s amusement. However, Grobguk knew on an instinctual level that the Ogre was stronger than him and Grobguk would die if he was stupid enough to fight it alone.

Fortunately, Grobguk had an entire tribe of expendable minions. Once the scouts located the Ogre’s lair, Grobguk would send waves of his minions at the Ogre until it was sufficiently weakened and Grobguk could kill it. After all, the Ogre was not necessarily a calamity. Far from it, Grobguk knew that if he could kill the Ogre and feast on the stone inside its head, Grobguk would grow even more powerful.

Cutting off another chunk of meat, Grobguk stuffed it in his mouth and savoured the rich flavours. “I wonder what Ogre tastes like?” He mused, blood dribbling down his chin as he smiled.