《The Long and Exciting Life of Kreet the Kobold (Life 2)》Reality

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“Damn it Jake, go get the fucking kobold and tell Edard and Sam to bring in the boys from the yard!”

“What about Grin? Is he dead?”

“Was. I had to use a fucking Raise Dead spell on him and he’s going to have one hell of a headache! Now go on. Get the kobold.”

Kreet looked at Sigmundurr and then both turned when the cleric walked in and sat in the large chair across from them.

“Yes, well you’ve certainly made a mess of things, haven’t you?”

“Raise Dead did you say? Are you a necromancer?” Kreet said, her eyes wide.

“Necromancer? Oh no, no. Just used a scroll. Damn expensive those things though. You’ll owe me for this!”

“Owe you ? You stole my husband! Your man would have killed my friend here if I hadn’t been able to heal him!”

“I didn’t. That was Jake’s idea. A bit of a loose canon is Jake. But he gets the jobs done,”

Kreet stood up, incredulous. “Are you telling me that a Cleric of Avandra is the leader of a bunch of lowlife scum who roust people for money in the slums of the Royal City?”

“Well, I wouldn’t call myself the leader exactly.”

Sigmundurr stood up beside her, “And you walled up the sewers to make your little guard-free zone for your bandits too I bet!”

“Now hold on, sit down. What are you talking about? Jake just got overzealous. Didn’t you tell him you had a hundred gold or so?”

Kreet sat back down and motioned for Sigmundurr to do the same. “Well, yes. He asked.”

“And you told him the truth? What kind of naive backwater cleric are you anyway?! I bet you haven’t got a copper more either. You really did tell him the truth, didn’t you?”

“Well, yes. Pelor…”

“Pelor. Yeah, that sounds like something a backwoods Cleric of Pelor would do. Let me tell you, little cleric, you’re not in the woods anymore. You’re in the city, and the sooner you learn what that means, the better off everybody will be! Now what’s this about walling up the sewer?”

Kreet was dumbfounded. Here she was, soaking in gore and blood and this man was somehow trying to make it all her fault?

“I hear you had a bunch of building supplies delivered. What do you expect my man to think? You’re practically screaming ‘Big Gold Hoard Here!’. You might as well put up a sign!”

Kreet couldn’t even form a proper response. She just sputtered, incredulous.

Sigmundurr spoke up for her. “Doesn’t matter. Your man gutted me and kidnapped Kreet’s husband! Are you saying that’s normal ?!”

“Well, no…”

Jake brought in Kallid then. His hands were bound together, as was his snout, but he didn’t look any the worse for wear. But his eyes were as red as they’d been the other night. But when he saw Kreet, they instantly began shifting towards blue again.

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“Unbind him,” Kreet demanded.

“Don’t recommend it boss,” said Jake. “Practically scratched Gar’s arm off last time.”

“He was seeing red. Instinct,” she explained. Look at his eyes. Do they look red to you?”

“Fuck me,” Jake said. “They’re almost blue!”

“Don’t know much about kobolds, do you?” Sigmundurr said.

“Go on, untie him,” said the leader of the Band.

Jake did as he was told, keeping Kallid at arm’s length as much as he could.

“Kreet!” Kallid croaked, his voice gone almost hoarse.

Jake finished the rope tying his hands together, and Kallid took advantage to cause a vicious scratch down his arm, to which Jake responded with a slap against Kallid’s head that sent him to the floor.

“Damn it, get the hell out Jake. Close the door behind you and get a bandage for that. As if we haven’t gotten enough blood on my rug already!”

“Fucking kobold!” he said before he left, missing a kick as Kallid scrambled up and over to Kreet and Sigmundurr.

The door closed with a thud.

“Now look,” the Cleric started. “We got off on the wrong foot, obviously. But it might be in our best interests to see what sort of accommodation we might be able to make. I’ve had some people in your neighborhood report to me. They like you, Kreet. I don’t have to be your enemy. Really I don’t.”

“First things first… wait. What’s your name anyway?”

“I am Avelyn Reed, and I should also let you know that in addition to being the nominal ‘leader’ of the Band, I am also a Royal Advisor to the throne. I can make things very difficult for you, if you make it necessary to do so. But I hope...”

“Shut up Avelyn Reed,” she said, and turned to her husband and hugged him fiercely. “Kally, are you all right? How did they treat you?”

“Don’t touch me, Kreet. I need a bath,” he croaked.

“What did they do?”

Kallid closed his eyes. “I don’t want to talk about it, Kreet. I’m okay.”

Kreet shot Avelyn a hard look, and Sig stood, ready for any command she might offer.

For his part, a ward went up around him instantly as he raised his hands. “Now hold on, Kreet. You have to understand, my men aren’t really under my control at all. Mostly I just keep the guards off of them. But listen to me before you make snap judgements.”

“Really Kally? You’re okay?”

He nodded, patting her hand. “I promise, I’m okay. Just… a little abused.”

“I swear, Avelyn, whether or not you have control over your men, I’m not going to let this go unpunished.”

“Perhaps. But let’s talk about the future. I understand you’re pregnant. And if you have plans to raise your children here, you’re going to have to come to terms with the Band one way or another. If it turns into a blood feud, you’re going to lose in the end. Someone’s going to be walking down the wrong street at the wrong time of day, and they’re going to come to an unfortunate end - with neither me nor you to revive them. Please, we can stop this now, or it can go on for years. It’s your choice. Ask your god, if you need to. The Band is big though. Jake is just the enforcer in your neighborhood. There are many more, and you won’t know them on sight. Think about it.”

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Kreet looked at Kallid and tried to kiss him, but he turned away. “Not now, Kreet. Sorry!” he croaked, and he turned away from her.

She turned back to Avelyn and sat back in her chair, bidding Sigmundurr to do the same.

“I do want to stay here,” she admitted. “But not under the Band’s thumb. Let’s make a deal - keep the band out of Block 104 and all the neighboring blocks around it. It’s no-mans land for the Band. Okay?”

The glowing ward went down.

“I can do that. In exchange?”

“Fuck exchange,” she spat.

“Kreet, let me explain how things are in the slums where you live. There are no guards there. They don’t go down there anymore. Haven’t for years. No sanitation crews either. As far as the rest of the city is concerned, it’s no-man’s land. Only the poorest of the poor live there. But have you seen any violence while you’ve been there? Okay, Jake being an exception. There isn’t. There are no robberies, no rapes, no murders. The area is relatively safe, in fact.”

“Jake is a pretty big exception,” she said, but let him continue on.

“Understood. But ask your neighbors about what life was there before the Band came to be. They will tell you. It’s bad, but it could be so much worse. It was worse - much worse.”

“But now you extort…”

“AND they don’t pay taxes to the city! Yes, we lean on them for money, to pay the Band for protection. Ask anyone up here in the guarded sections how much they pay in taxes! You’ll find the Band takes much less than they pay up here! Yes, it’s extortion. They wouldn’t pay anything if they could help it. I know that, they’re poor people. But it costs to keep them safe. It really does. They are better off with the Band than without us.”

“Prove it.”

Avelyn smiled. “Are you serious?”

“Yes. Prove it. Keep the band out of the slums.”

“You know, that’s not a bad idea. Not a bad idea at all.”

“For one month?” Kreet asked, not expecting such an easy capitulation.

“I’ll do you one better, Kreet the Cleric of Pelor. I’ll keep the Band out of the slums totally - until you ask me to bring them back! And you will. You don’t know what chaos is. You will find out, and find out quickly. Are you sure that’s what you want? Your neighbors might not be so enthralled with you when they’ve learned what you’ve caused.”

For the first time, Kreet wasn’t sure. She’d never really lived in a place like this. Could he be right? No guards, no Band? Some would call it freedom, but…

“Now, about the sewers. I’d heard rumors they’re working again. Is that true? Did you have something to do with that?”

Kreet was on firmer ground here. “Yes. We went down and found that the sewers had been walled up. I assume your people did that?”

“Now why the hell would we do that?”

“To create the slums that you rule, of course!”

“Kreet. Again, ask your neighbors. That area became what it is long before the Band formed to help police it. If you think we blocked up the sewers to cause that, you give us far more credit than we deserve. We’re not that clever. But it is something very interesting to know. Be careful with that though, Kreet. If what you say is true, it would take someone a lot more powerful than me to make that happen. You’re already starting to draw attention to yourself in the city. You might get more than you expect.”

“Alright. You keep the Band out of the slums. If we want you back, I’ll let you know.”

Avelyn nodded. “Deal. But you will, and sooner than you think. They’ll demand it, and you will too. Are we done here?”

“Not yet,” Sigmundurr said, standing up. “I have a date with Big Jake. If you’ve gotten your courtyard clear by now.”

“More bloodshed? I suspect your Cleric here doesn’t have enough to revive you a second time in as many days.”

“She won’t need to.”

Avelyn nodded. “So be it. Big boys can fight without my approval or disapproval. What’s your name again?”

“Sigmundurr. Not Big Sigmundurr. The name is big enough.”

“Alright Sigmundurr. I doubt you’ll believe me, but I wish you luck. Jake overstepped his bounds last night. However, I warn you that I don’t think you’ll win - and I won’t be healing you afterwards.”

“I get it. Fresh out of scrolls too?”

Avelyn held his hands out, “So sorry. They’re kind of in reserve. You can see yourselves out.”

They left the room, and found Jake right outside. Sigmundurr smiled.

“Would you like to dance outside, Big Jake?”

Jake laughed. “Again? How many times do I have to kill you, fat man?”

“Just once more,” Sigmundurr said, and held the door open.

Kreet held Kallid’s hand, but she noticed his eyes had turned red again - a smouldering red when he looked at Big Jake. She squeezed his hand and he turned back to her.

“Sorry,” he croaked again.

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