I just humbly ask for everyone who still is wondering about weapons, for all ideas to be posted under last chapter. Just to have everything in one place. Feel free to write multiple of them… and possibly not to duplicate them. The poll will be made… in a week… I guess

Edited by: KenChi死

So… after less than a minute of wonderful flight desperate act of not falling down (that… “act” couldn’t even been called gliding) I finally stopped was stopped by a tree… and I “flew” pretty far, you know… now ‘scuse me, as I am going to take this branch out of my ass…

… and now… how do I get off this…

~EVERYONE – BE CAUTIOUS NOW!

… what now?

~MY PUSSY COMPASS IS REACTING!

Your WHAT!?

~ARE YOU FUCKING DEAF!? WOMEN NEARBY!

You must be a fucking kid… no wait… someone is actually coming

~I FUCKING TOLD YOU! BUUUUT NOOOO! LUST IS WRONG!!! I AM NEVER FUCKING WRONG ABOUT WOMEN’S LOCATION! YOU HEAR THAT!?

Are those… adventurers? The vanguard… lionman? Whut? … LEAVE KHAJIT ALONE! Khajit is innocence of this crime!... jokes aside some hunter at the side of the formation… two little girls in the middle and some… harpy?... a bit farther back, and whole “formation” is closed by… an elf? With… a shitload of weapons… throwing daggers, combat daggers, short swords…

~JAKCPOT!

Lust… calm your tits…

~IT IS A FUCKING JACKPOT! JUST LOOK AT IT! There is everything a grown man needs! A loli! A beast loli! A beastwoman and elf! A damned, well tanned, elf! COMANDER TARGET IN RANGE OF OUR CANONS! ATTACK IMMEDIATELY! FOR THE MOTHERLAN…sdkjafmksdkjawd

~Shh… no screams… just dreams….

…thanks Greed…

~At your service…

At first I wanted to say something like “Hi, I just met you, and this is crazy, but I am stuck on a tree… so help me maybe?” but I changed my mind. For now… let see what are their intention… let’s follow them… fuck… wait… I am on the tree.

And I began to force my way down. And it was pretty successful… I was about 4 branches lower… as the team once again moved past “my tree”. The funny thing they came from the very same direction… how could they be so… no wait… someone casted a spell that caused everyone to lose their way… who could it be, hmm?

The team left once again… and I once again began to get closer and closer to the earth… in reasonable speed. As I was three or four meters above the ground and was considering simply jumping down… they came once again…

“I could swear, that we went past this tree once or twi…” “Three… it’s three times now” OH HOLY FUCKING SHIT! Why the hell did my mouth move?! DAMN! I used to live completely alone… and well, yes, I started talking to myself… I completely unintentionally speaking my mind. They start quarrelling each other, and I just sat there hoping that they would simply reach cthe onclusion that it was some kind hallucination “Who are you!? Show yourself!”

Here all my hopes and dreams lie broken.

“I am not hiding in a first place… a tip for you… Looking low under your feet and you may overlook something high in the skies.” And they looked at me “… what the hell are you doing up there?!” “I devoted my life to study the art of dendrology, you know ?” “Dendro… what?!... who the hell are you!?” “I….” what to say, what to say…. Haha! I have got something perfect! “ I am a man in the mask!... well bandana… let’s just say it’s a mask, ok?” “We can tell you are…” Now it starts!... I just hope I won’t lose myself… “Of course you can, I’m not questioning your powers of observation, I’m merely remarking upon the paradox of asking a masked man who he is…”

They looked angered and furious at same time…

“But on this most auspicious of nights, permit me then, in lieu of the more commonplace soubriquet, to suggest the character of this dramatic persona…”

I jumped from the tree, landing perfectly in front of them. This is where the true art shall have place

“Volia! In view humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the “vox populi” now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin, van guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition! “ I was gesticulating furiously why performing this completely stolen speech. I needed to take a breath or two before continuing. This time in a calm, almost judging tone. “The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous.” I moved few steps to the side “Verily this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it’s my very good honor to meet you and you may call me… Z” FUCK! the end has completely ruined it all!

(ED: Help me plz)

( I don’t believe that you don’t know it… but -> https://youtu.be/7fcjg458JPI?t=11s)

“Insane druid. Told you that” someone whispered. Insane? I will show you the definition of insanity you little…. “Mister Zariel” Loli… damned Lust., a girl clad in magician robes with marks (probably) of magic council asked. “If you really have to ruin someone’s fun… then yes. There are few that could call me with that name… and you are…?” “Messenger” not really talkative person, are we? Yet, from under her robe she picked two envelopes… one from “council of bla bla bla..” oh, the other one is from Hanna! Gonna read it as fast as… “Thank you for your contribution…” I told carefully “But… do you wish anything more from my humble persona?” “T… there is something we would like to ask… in the end… this is our only a trail…”

A trooobules…. Show them a way out! Shush em away…

“If you step this far… you may just come to my hut… for dinner… you don’t mind goulash of some predators living here?” that’s right…wait what?! No! how the fuck could I say something like that?!

Please, politely refuse…. Politely refuse and go where you came from…

They looked upon each another.

“We really appreciate your invitation… and we will humbly force our need upon you.” The Dark elf said “At least you are polite...” I said quietly, yet loud enough for everyone to hear “… not like certain someone who has just called me insane… this way!... not that you gonna remember it anyway…” “Could we ask you to do something about the…” I snapped my fingers “mist…” as she finished her sentence the mist had fallen. Was that cool enough?! Tremble you maggots!

As we were getting closer to the hut, the Kaito came to greet us… at least me.

“Wrrrr”  

“Kaito…” “Woof?” “These are…” Happily “woof” “Not food” “Aruuu..”

No, I don’t understand what Kaito said, BUT I WANT TO BELIVE that I read out his intention just right!

“is that… your pet?” yes he is, but as we are role playing an insane sage from the woods… “HOW DARE YOU MEASURE EVERYTHING IN YOUR OWN VALUES! Kaito is a friend!... this way please.”

Sebastian landed on my arm and. Nothing more he had to do. I invited them to the hut. In the “living room”… ok… in the room big enough to barely hold us all I set some plates and began to talk.

“What brings you here, the forest is still dangerous, even with me around” “Well… we are actually like…four different parties… and as one has already finished it task… the rest of us are looking for… a divine chimera.”

I looked at the magician that gave me the letter. She must already know. But as she kept looking me in the eyes without even budging… I found out that she never told them. Good for me. Now, let’s play… to show them I know something yet need something in return…

“What do you need from him? He is not… really sociable, you know?” “So you know something…” Why do I think that beastmen are about to jump at me and force me to speak? “let me just say… the answer may lay just in front of you… you just have to know where to look.” “ We have no time for those games of yours… you better.” “But I have time. Lots of it. And if you think you can take me down… you are more than welcome to try..” I whistled quietly, and Kaito showed his head thought the door. “let me ask once again… What. Do. You. Want?” “For us…” Harpy began “He is like a hero from fairy tales… a messiah that shall break the chains of our mind and instincts… show us the definition of what it means to be truly free.. as beasts…” “And what if he doesn’t want to show you anything?” ‘Wha…” “Show us… free us… make everything instead of us because we are lazy pieces of shits… am I right? Why the fuck do you want to drag him in your mess… next elven…” “It is… complicated… I have an offer… let’s just say I want him as a mercenary… all details would be presented to him right afte…” “And you, little miss?” I cut what she wanted to finish. Now I noticed that from under her traveling robe a tail… tails were sticking out… another beast men? “I came to kill him… but I start questioning what I knew… as I found his random acts of good… I actually still consider, what should I do with you… beastking…”

So our lovely multiple tailed girl is either smarter… or was able to break through the power of my bandana… probably the last… as I couldn’t identify her at all…

“It’s just as this little maiden said… “ I looked upon the gathered “Now I can greet you properly… Welcome at the place where the world has began, and where its doom lays… As you pilgrimage is over…” and I took the shape of Leshy… because why not? I only know one thing now… decisions shall be made.