“What the…” Charlie stared at the clock.

“Charlie! You in there man?” Josef’s voice hit him.

“Yeah… yeah I am.” Charlie replied with only half the normal strength of his voice.

“Hey… did I… did I come to your place for dinner last night?” Charlie asked through the door. He slowly stood up and kicked aside the trash that littered his floor.

“Did I… Did I say anything? Anything that sounded crazy?” Charlie asked further and reached for the knob and turned it, swinging the door open and looking up at the man who filled the frame. He stepped back and allowed Josef to duck his head under the frame and enter the room.

“Charlie man… what’s going on… are you… seriously, you’re freaking me out, and you know me, I can handle anything.” Josef’s voice was full of concern, his eyes shone with worry, his head bowed down so that he could see his smaller friend.

“No… nothing… never mind. Just a… it must have been a dream, just a really vivid dream…” Charlie replied and shook his head, afraid to ask more.

“Come in, sit down… I want to talk… I’m sorry about the smell, and the mess, and just… I’m sorry about everything I’ve put you through… I pushed everyone else away by ignoring them at every step, John, Sarah, Pete, Phil, Mary… everyone I ran with, everyone I worked with… you’re the last one, and I’ve been taking you for granted too.”

“Charlie…” Josef said as Charlie turned his back and walked over to the bed, Josef followed, making his way over to the small round table with its lone pair of chairs.

It hadn’t occurred to Josef before, but the very fact that there were ‘two’ chairs was a little significant. ‘That set can be bought with as many as six chairs, but… he chose to have only two… he never planned on there being more than that here, and so far, he’s right.’ Josef restrained a look of pity and took his seat on the smooth dark wooden surface.

“Can I… can I get you something to drink?” Charlie asked.

“Yeah… yeah sure.” Josef replied with a heavy, weary tone.

“Great… give me a second.” Charlie replied and glanced out the window, it was late, clearly. ‘I must have slept most of the day… damn.’

He kicked aside more of the garbage in his way to remake the path, sending bottles and boxes and bags bouncing or floating through the air or over the refuse until he reached the little kitchen.

“What have you got?” Josef raised his voice a little, “I’m not picky, even water is fine.”

Charlie glanced at the wine fridge, his eyes lingered, he glared at it with hatred as strong as the affectionate look he’d given to it the day it had been installed.

“Ah, one sec.” Charlie shouted and cracked open the refrigerator door. ‘Ok, largely empty… no surprise there.’

‘No.’ The thought came to his mind, but even while he denied the thought, he felt his limbs moving of their own accord, his legs carried him over to the corner and then there he was. He was standing in front of his wine fridge, he pulled the key from his pocket, stuck it into the slot, turned it, opened the fridge and pulled at the tan edge of the sliding drawer.

‘Nothing.’ He thought, almost pleased, almost ‘satisfied’. He felt the breath of his lungs release in one great exhale.

Then his left hand, almost as independent as his legs had felt a moment ago, reached out to another drawer and opened it as he had the last, and there it was.

“Castillo Ygay Gran Reserva Especial Tinto.” Charlie read the label and pulled out the bottle. “Might as well drink it…” He muttered and looked over his shoulder, “How about a bottle of wine! I got your favorite!”

“Great!” Josef shouted back, “I didn’t drive, so it’s fine.”

Charlie closed the fridge and went over to the counter where the cup and glass cabinet hung on the wall just about head height.

He opened it up and moved the few blue fragments of glass out of the way, then reached up to the white shelf in the cabinet and pulled out two glasses.

He set each one down, yanked open the drawer beneath the counter and began to rummage. “Just a second, I’m just looking for a corkscrew.”

He rattled around amidst an array of useless implements, a pizza cutter, a bottle opener for beer, an ice cream scooper, a peeler for carrots or potatoes, even a goddamn apple slice maker.

“Ah ha!” Charlie announced loud enough for Josef to hear and he yanked up a little red oval shape with a little white plus sign on it. “Swiss army knife!” he said and pulled it out.

“Useful things, aren’t they?” Josef said from the other room while Charlie pried the little corkscrew up.

“Yeah, yeah they are… but it’s weird if you think about it.” Charlie asserted.

“Weird?” Josef asked, Charlie didn’t need to be there to know that Josef was canting his head when he asked the question.

“Yeah, I get the different knives, the tiny scissors, even the nail file. All those have a practical field use. The knife can cut small things, the nail file is for hygiene in the field, the tiny tweezers can pluck splinters or even take out a bullet I guess, and even that tiny pair of scissors can cut bandages. But really? A corkscrew? I didn’t know that the Swiss Army was so full of alcoholics that they had to have that feature in the field.” Charlie cleared his throat and did his best impression of a ‘sort of’ Germanic accent.

“You may be called upon to drink wine under fire, when you are, you must open your wine with great swiftness, your country depends upon you!”

Josef’s laughter was heartening in spite of everything else, it was a corny joke, but it felt good anyway while he shoved the corkscrew in, twisted the oblong shape until the screw was buried within and then tugged it free with a satisfying ‘pop’.

He poured the deep red wine and savored the aroma when it hit his nose.

Charlie left the bottle on the counter and returned with both glasses, he held one out to Josef who took the glass with a grateful nod, and Charlie went past and sat on the bed.

“Thanks.” Josef said and raised his glass.

“For you, anything.” Charlie replied and did the same.

“To tomorrow?” Josef asked.

“To today. That’s the only thing I’m sure of.” Charlie replied, Josef shrugged.

“Compromise, both.” Josef replied.

“Fine, to today and hopefully tomorrow.” Charlie said, and their glasses went up another inch to signify their mutual acceptance of the compromise, and they drank the first sips out of their glasses.

“So… Charlie… ah, what you were saying-” Josef began.

“I meant every word.” Charlie said point blank and with iron finality and a sharp nod. “I wasn’t exaggerating, I wasn’t kidding, I wasn’t being facetious, I’ve been a shitty friend and a burden and I’m sure I haven’t added anything to your quality of life and you’ve stuck with me. I’ve just been… I’ve been caught in this fog…” He reached up and touched his head, as if it hurt.

“Everything feels heavy, everything is hard… I don’t have the energy or desire to move most of the time, like my brain is too big for my skull and it’s killing me…” Charlie shut his eyes tight.

“Have you seen a doctor? What if it’s a tumor?” Josef asked and took another sip.

“No… it’s not a medical issue, it’s because… it’s because of something else. Something, some people I’ve lost… it’s just…” Charlie drifted off and took another sip.

‘Everything is wrong, that clock was broken sometimes and others not, I ‘know’ that wine wasn’t there, the dinner happened yesterday, didn’t it… I need to start focusing… I need to think, I need to try to figure this out… could this be because of what I did?’ It seemed unlikely.

But he couldn't rule it out.

“Charlie man, what are friends for? You were there for me through everything, my grandfather, my father, you were the only one to support me when I wanted to drop out of college to take over the store. Everybody else was all, ‘But you can’t waste your brain! You could do this, that, or the other… you could be rich and famous, it’s a whole new field…’ and so on. It was bad, but you backed my decision. You even got the third year accounting students to help fix the books, a lawyer to settle things with the IRS and… man not a damn good thing I’ve got today… would be at all if you hadn’t watched out for me…” Josef’s eyes welled up and a tear ran away from his face.

“You saved my family legacy… there’s no thanks I can offer you that’s enough… you’re in a bad way now… I don’t know why, but it doesn’t matter, what matters is you need help. I’m not a doctor, not of anything, but by god what the fuck is the damn point if we don’t have each other’s backs?!” Josef exclaimed and drained his glass.

The words poured out of Charlie’s mouth before he could even stop himself. “Josef I’ve destroyed the world! The whole fucking world is doomed and it’s all my fault!” It was a shout, it was a roar, it was an exclamation of the utmost despair that had brewed in his gut for Charlie did not even know how long anymore.

And it was answered with a mute, silent stare, deeper than that of the very grave.