《Tales of Regventus Book Six: Aurumist》Chapter 20
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Ansel walked back from Delis House towards Keene Manor. He had gone to use Hector’s birds to deliver messages all over the kingdom. In less than five days they would be gathering outside Aurumist. They would finally try to take the city and the throne, and Ansel hoped they were ready. Griffa had said they couldn’t wait anymore so if they were ready or not, the time was upon them.
As Ansel approached the open gate to Keene Manor, he thought of Griffa. He had barely slept the night before. He had been up all night worrying about her. He thought of her out in the forest tired and cold. He wished he could be with her, holding her, keeping her warm and safe. Ansel knew Kedan, as her protector, would do everything to keep her safe and as comfortable as he could, but it didn’t stop Ansel from wishing he was by her side.
He thought of the battle looming before him, and he could admit he was afraid. He wasn’t scared for himself. He was scared for Griffa. The closer they got to taking Aurumist, the more Ansel feared for her. He knew she would do anything to save her kingdom, and he was afraid it would take everything for her to do it. Ansel didn’t know how he would bare it if she died. He didn’t know how he would live in Regventus without her. He didn’t think he could.
Ansel walked into the house as the sun was setting behind the manor. He entered the parlor to find Max sitting all alone by the fire. Ansel almost asked him where everyone was, but then he remembered it was only Talon and Addi who were missing.
“Where are Talon and Addi?” asked Ansel as he sat down in a chair next to Max.
“Addi is downstairs getting together some things I asked her to pack for our journey to Aurumist. Talon is still seeing to sending off messages. He went to the Quick House to use the birds there for the last few,” replied Max.
Ansel nodded. “What are you up to in here by yourself?”
Max shrugged. “I was just thinking of Griffa and the battle to come.”
“How are you feeling about our trip to Aurumist?”
“Unclear,” said Max. “I have seen many visions. I have seen many versions of what could happen, but I do not believe any of them show me the full picture. Our decisions and actions will decide the fate of the kingdom and each one of us.”
“Can you see anything that can help us save the kingdom or Griffa?” asked Ansel.
“I can only tell you to not lose hope. No matter what you see, or think is the truth, don’t lose hope. You will not help our queen with doubts or fear,” said Max.
“Do you think she is safe now out in the forest?” asked Ansel.
“Yes,” said Max. “The gods will see her through to Aurumist, so she can do what they need her to do. She has Kedan with her, and he will keep her safe. If you want Griffa to live through what is to come, you will need to put your trust in her protector.”
Ansel sighed. “It’s very difficult, Max. I want to think I did the right thing giving up the line of protectors, but I can’t help but think I should be the one by her side protecting her. What if I have doomed her by giving my duty away? What if I have brought on the wrath of the gods by upsetting what has been in place since the beginning of the kingdom?”
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“You can’t think that way. What is done, is done.”
“I can’t help but think that way. If I had put away my selfish desires and done my duty, Griffa would have moved on. She would have found a new way with Talon. I would be by her side protecting her as I was meant to. What if I was the only one who could have seen her through this as her protector?”
“I don’t believe that is true. I would not have let you have done it, if I thought it would have endangered Griffa. I think what you did was for the best, and besides there is no changing it now. I believe you will have another part to play in the battle to come, and it will be important you are free to do as you must,” said Max with certainty.
“What do you mean?” asked Ansel.
“I am not sure, only that you must be ready to do what is necessary to save Griffa and the kingdom, we all must be ready.”
The next few days passed in busy anticipation. They sent the last of the letters the next morning as their birds returned. They sorted through message after message, confirming all would come to Aurumist and do as they were asked. As they sorted through messages on the third day, Ansel looked around the room and saw that they all looked extremely tired. He wondered if any of them were sleeping at all.
Ansel knew he wasn’t sleeping much. He tossed and turned in the bed. He stared at Griffa’s empty space, longing to hold her. When he did sleep, he dreamed of Griffa. He couldn’t remember much of his dreams, but he knew Griffa was in all of them. Ansel wished he could talk to her. He wished he knew how she was feeling. Somehow, he knew letting her go on to Aurumist with just her protector was the right thing, but it didn’t make it any easier.
The night before they were to leave for Aurumist everyone was quiet at dinner. No one even tried to make conversation. Ansel watched as everyone attempted to eat. By the end of the meal, not much food had been eaten, and everyone went their separate ways. Addi went to go pack a change of clothes for Griffa. Max went down to the cellar to pack a few more things, and to be alone. Maybell said she would clean up dinner and go to bed early. Talon and Ansel went to the parlor together.
Ansel sat in a chair close to the fire, and Talon walked over to the side table. He grabbed two glasses of wine and the carafe of wine found there. He brought them over to a chair close to Ansel and sat them on a small table there. He sat down and poured two glasses, and he gave one to Ansel. For a long while, they both just sipped their wine and stared at the fire.
After Talon had poured their second glasses of wine, he looked at the fire and said. “I wonder how she is.”
“I wish I knew as well,” said Ansel. “I gave up the right to know her feelings when she is away from me. We can only trust that she is well.”
“Kedan will see to her safety,” said Talon. “I am more worried about how she is holding up. I worry what she thinks she will have to do to save the kingdom.”
“She will do whatever she thinks she has to do,” replied Ansel before taking a sip of wine. “Even if that is giving up her own life.”
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“I don’t know if I can let her do it,” said Talon.
“How will you stop her? You know you can’t. Whatever happens, we will have to accept it.”
“You can dismiss the idea of losing her that easily, Ansel?” asked Talon incredulously as he turned to look at Ansel. “How can you even imagine such a possibility?”
“Don’t think I can face losing the woman I love easily, Talon. To lose her, will cause the death in me in some way. I may still be able to function, but I am afraid everything of worth about me will be gone. Any goodness inside of me, I think, must come from her. Who will I be if she is gone?”
Talon sighed and took a drink of his wine. “She is the only person in this kingdom who ever made me truly realize how empty my life was. Before I realized I loved her, I lived a selfish life of lust and frivolity. I ashamed my parents with my carrying on, but I didn’t care. I pursued women to just throw them away when I was done. That was my plan with Griffa. How could I have been so cold?
“She was my friend, someone I knew almost all my life, and I planned to use her as I could and throw her away. I should have known better. I should have realized quickly that things would be different with her. I think I may have started loving her after our first kiss. I was just too blind and stupid to realize it. The only reason I have become who I am, is her. What happens to me if she is gone? Will I go back to being the selfish idiot I once was?”
They drank in silence for a while. Ansel contemplated his life until now. He was always a quiet child growing up. He was afraid of saying the wrong thing and suffering his father’s wrath. Ansel could barely remember laughing as a child. He wasn’t sure he knew what fun was back then. While the other children in Abscon where running around, playing, Ansel was being drilled on the history of the protectors. He was out in the fields behind his house with his father as Ansel was hit with spells thrown by his father.
It wasn’t until Ansel was placed at Keene Manor that he really knew what it meant to relax and have fun. Renweard would tease him until he would finally laugh. Griffa’s mother would remind him to not take things so seriously. After his failed relationship with Desmona and the other indiscretions of his youth, Ansel came back to Keene Manor to find himself bossed around by a young girl.
He was always fascinated with Griffa. Her sole purpose seem to be to have fun and adventure. She lived life to its fullest, finding merriment and wonder all around her. He watched Griffa grow into a strong young woman, and she somehow even weathered losing her father. She withstood the gossip in Abscon she faced as an independent and fiery young woman who wouldn’t cave into society’s pressures. She became a beautiful, kind, adventurous woman whom Ansel loved.
He remembered their first kiss. He could tell immediately how passionate she was. He thought over that kiss for months as he worked with his guards in the Valley before going to get Max. He wasn’t sure at the time he could ever be with Griffa, but he knew he would never be kissed like that again by any woman other than her. Ansel thought over all their times together. He remembered the passionate nights, the joyful days, the times of pain when he thought he would lose her. Every part of his life was intertwined with her. If she was gone, so much of him would be gone with her.
“What will you do, Ansel?” asked Talon quietly. “If Griffa does die for the kingdom, what will you do?”
Ansel took a breath, and turned to look at Talon. “I will help Max as he takes the throne. I will help him set up his Ring. I will make sure Kedan is settled as his protector, and then I will leave the kingdom. I can’t live in Regventus without Griffa. I couldn’t take living anywhere in this kingdom, knowing she was truly gone.”
“Where will you go?” asked Talon.
“I will go to the East Sealand and I will get on a boat and see where it takes me. I will find somewhere I can do some good. I will find somewhere to serve, and I will try to be the man who deserves the love of Griffa.”
Talon drained his glass and looked at Ansel. “If it comes to it, I think I would like to go with you if you will have my company.”
“You would leave the Valley? You will leave your responsibility of leading your village?”
“It has no attraction to me if Griffa is gone. I cannot be the leader the Valley needs if I lose her. I will transfer leadership permanently to the Vin’s. Clara is a capable leader, and Addi is kind and intelligent. They will see to the prosperity of the village. I will leave this kingdom with you, and I will find a way to serve with you. We will both try to be the men who deserve Griffa’s love.”
“If that is what you want, then if the worst comes, we will both see to setting up Max as king, and then leave together,” said Ansel as he refilled his own glass.
“I don’t want it to come to that, Ansel,” said Talon in a weak voice. “I want to live in this kingdom with Griffa as my queen. I want to watch her be happy with you and start a family. I want to see what this kingdom can be under her rule.”
“I know,” said Ansel. “But what can we do, but wait and see what happens?”
Ansel watched as Talon leaned forward and stared at the fire. He had his hand over his face and seemed to be thinking. Ansel drank his wine and watched him. After a few minutes, Talon took his hand from his face. He stared at the fire, and Ansel watched Talon’s eyes grow hard and cold.
“There is one thing I know I will do for sure,” said Talon fiercely.
“What is that?” asked Ansel quietly.
“When we are in Aurumist, I will find a way to kill Philo Quick. I will do it for all the pain and suffering he has caused Griffa. I will do it so he can never hurt our queen’s kingdom again.”
Ansel smiled slightly. “I would like to join you in that task if you will have me.”
Talon nodded as he refiled his glass. He then poured the last of the wine into Ansel’s glass before raising his own. “A toast to Philo Quick’s quick end, and our queen’s long life,”
Ansel raised his glass. “May his death be full of suffering, and may Griffa’ rule be long and prosperous.”
They both drained their glasses quickly.
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