Lord Joyde The Madman: Heylo, Everybody! How are you all doing?

Meh.

Such a downer, aren't I?

Sorry about my update speed all of you, but I can't help it! I just got myself an amazing setup computer and I just have to play through all the games I missed out on or missed playing... like The Witcher 3... I'm not even halfway done with Hearts Of Stone because my last computer fried itself.

Which is totally not my fault. Its not my problem that alcohol and yogurt don't go well with your cooler. (In my drunken state, I firmly believed that my yogurt, which I still don't know how I got, would increase the speed of my cooler because my computer was feeling hot. The resulting explosion made me feel even smarter as steam = released heat.)

... Now that I think about it, I may have stolen said yogurt from a nearby shop.

Hmm, oh well, no use crying about split milk, lets get on with the stor-Oh wait, nvm. There is something I need to say about my most recent review.

While it is true that my story has quite a few of grammatical mistakes in it, they are mostly there intentionally. Why? Well, as an Author, I prefer Drama over everything else. Correct tenses, words or even whole sentences may be cast aside if I feel that it makes for a better fit.

As for any real mistake like misspelled words or an "and" instead of "an"... I have no real excuse for them.

Don't mind me guys and girls! I'm just a line break...

Moments Afterwards - The Ancient Laboratory - Joyde's Point Of View...

True to Istvan's warning, as soon as I walked inside of the first room within this Laboratory, there was a mass of players gathered in the center of the wide room.

It was a dimly lit place, perfect for a stealth-oriented character, something of which they seemed to possess none of. Then again, which real adventurer is going to be a good rogue or thief, I mean come on.

"GROOOAR!" A massive, lumbering beast thundered forward alongside its two brothers and towards the group of players, quite easily throwing them aside as spells and curses erupted from behind, sowing chaos in the entirety of the group.

Focusing my gaze onto one of the beasts, I say."Show Target."

Target - Sewn Ogre (lvl 20 elite) Not to be mistaken for an actual ogre, this tall abomination was forged by Necromancers, most likely out of the corpses of their victims. Health: 2500/2500 Mana: 0/0 Stamina: UNDEAD

True to their system description, the beasts are like massive lumps of human flesh, skin and bone sewn together and animated by dark magic. I grit my teeth as I watch the group of around twelve people getting annihilated by the undead before finally deciding that enough was enough.

"You guys fucking suck!" I let out a rather childish remark at people who I don't even know and charge full on ahead. Using my Chaos Rush alongside my right hand scythe, I slice half of the ogre's leg and then grab its skin as I am about to pass by it, allowing me to quickly turn around my do the same to the other half of the leg as I charge in between its legs."RRRRRRRRRRHAAAAARH!" The Ogre gives out an unholy scream as it falls down onto the ground and I quickly approach in front of its fallen head. Activating my Raging Fist and feeling my skin be fully replaced by molten metal, I channel 150 health points worth of essence into my next punch as I unleash it onto the things skull, promptly shattering it and killing the Ogre.

"Wha?!?!? Who the fuck are you?!" One of the players behind me exclaims as I just shrug and climb onto the corpse of the fallen ogre, using it as a platform to jump onto the face of the next one as I just barely dodge an oncoming fist. Acting quickly, I slice both of the ogre's eyes and then re-position myself behind its head, only to receive a massive blow from the other surviving ogre.

You have sustained a massive blow! (958 damage)

"ARGH! SHIT!" Gathering my bearings as I manage to hold on to the the second ogre's backside, I shove my fist into its now empty-eye socket and tear out a piece of its rotting brain, claiming my second kill of the day.

Scanning the room as I jump off the thing, I turn my attention towards the necromancers. I can't risk going up against the ogre with half my health gone... I need something to devour.

Activating my Blood Healing and feeling my mana no longer regenerating, I slam my shoulder into a nearby necromancer, making her lose proper footing and interrupt whatever spell she was about to cast. Tearing through her abdomen with both of my scythes, I use Devour to heal myself to nearly full as I turn my attention to the next caster.

"Curse Of Speed!" He shouts just as I am about to use my Chaos Rush only to find it no longer castable for the duration of the curse. Blinking in surprise as I feel the earth shake behind my back, I side-step the following blow of the last Ogre, allowing me to see the group of players just watching me fight and not doing anything at all to help me.

"Horrify!" One of the Necromancers shouts as a blast of green energy enters me, clouding my vision and thus, allowing the ogre to land a second hit.

You have sustained a CRITICAL blow! (1423 damage) You are close to death! (77/1500 health)

"Holy shit!" Blood gathered in my mouth as I writhed under the sewn ogre's massive fists, but instead of panicking, I felt myself smile. Picking myself up from the blow, I charge the necromancer who horrified me and grabbed his head with my right hand, Raging Fist turned on."A-A-A-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" He screams out in pain as the molten metal begins to tear away at his own flesh. Letting out a maddening laugh, I slam his face into the black-slate stone wall.

Curse Of Speed is no longer in effect!

Grinning as the system message appears and disappears in front of me, I let out another laugh as I ready my legs and say while looking into the bleeding Necromancers eyes."Chaos Rush!" The burst of speed carries me across to the other side of the room with the bits of what was once his face following behind as I laugh again and spot the ogre charging at me."RRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARH!"

Thinking quickly, I grab a nearby vase and launch it into the ogre, promptly stunning him for a few seconds as he stumbles and smashes his head into a pole. Chuckling momentarily, I turn around just in time to see a bolt of black energy collide with my face.

You've been hit! (203 damage!)

You are dangerously close to death! (53/1500 health)

"Hehehe-ah, AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" I laugh again, this time with clear insanity as I find myself charging into the last surviving Necromancer with the full force of my Raging Fist and Chaos Rush combined, tearing through her mana shield and managing to stun her.

Watching her fall down onto her knees as I feel myself grin, I grab her by the neck and throw her into the air, catching her foot and slamming my hand downwards, promptly splitting her skull into many pieces as her head shatters onto the floor in one gory mess.

With its final link to reality gone, the Sewn Ogre is disassembled, the potentially dozens of souls echoing from within it as they are freed, cheering and rejoicing all the while."Thank... you...."

Smiling to myself as I watch the scene unfold, I turn my head around towards the group of players, but before I could say anything, another blue screen pops up before me.

A fiend of the deep sends its hails... Will you answer?

Blinking in surprise as I ninja-loot everything the mobs I just killed dropped, much to the players dismay, I turn back around towards the next room of the dungeon."Harold, who is it?"

"Sorry mate, not allowed to say a word." Aw crap. Then again, I suppose that it's only fair."Hello?"

I mutter out somewhat silently as I flip the bird to the players behind me, eliciting several curses and screams of frustration to erupt, much to my amusement."Ahhh... it is good that you have decided to answer my hail, Emperor."

"That voice... Yyl?" I say with some surprise as the Old God lets out a massive harrumph-like sound, complemented by the phantasmal image of a mass of writhing tentacles forming in my mind."Hah! Two hundred years and you've yet to gain any form of respect to your elders... though, I suppose that you are older than I soul-wise."

Yyl'rhiad, one of EUPHORIA's many *fiends of the deep*. An ancient monstrosity born out of the seeping darkness from the void surrounding this world. If the gods of EUPHORIA are counted as the *good guys* of the game then the fiends are most definitely the bad guys.

Yyl'rhiad takes the form of a swirling vortex of tormented souls with pure black tendrils weaving through the storm and innumerable eyes staring through anyone daring enough to look back... most likely to be crushed by one of his tentacles in the meantime. However, like I've said before, Chaos does not discriminate... not even against tentacle monsters.

Cracking my neck as I continue onward, making sure to hide in the shadows as to not alert any of the NPC enemies nearby whilst I converse with the old one."Well what can I say, respect hasn't ever really been my good side."

"Hah! True enough. Anyways, since this is you and not some other Destined One, can I just cut all the drama bullshit and cut to the chase?" The old voice echoes with surprising vitality as I quick my eyebrow at seemingly no one.

"But I love drama..." I pout somewhat uncharacteristically as I place my hand onto a necromancers mouth and tear his neck out with a molten hand."Hah! You really do not change, do you boy? Hmm... how do I put this in a few sentences..."

Blinking at him and remembering the role he played in my former empire, I whispered into the shadows."Let me guess, you're here to offer me help in order to secure your previous position once I eventually reclaim what is mine?"

A massive, guttural growl of approval echoes in my mind as the walls around me shake, an aftereffect of conversing with an old one."Yes... I would indeed like that. After all, I cannot say I do not miss the many Destined One's who saw my form as sexually attractive..."

You see, to the denizens of this world, Yyl is a monstrosity above all else, most commonly referred to as the Lord Of Carnage And Harvest for his appearances in several giant battles where he would just slaughter everything and everyone and then eat their souls, much to Harold's dismay might I add, to us players... Well, to men he is kind of this ancient grandpa who kinda wants to appear evil but is actually fun when you get to know him... as for women..

Well... let me just repeat that Chaos does not discriminate... not even against tentacle lovers or consensual-rape enthusiasts. Seriously, there are times when not even I can fully understand the needs of a woman, but hey who am I to judge. If you love having your holes penetrated by a mass of tendrils, then that's your thing, not mine.

"I have nothing against making you one of the main deities of my Empire again, Yyl. I was planning on doing it anyway for all the benefits you provide. However, I feel like you've got something for me that I'm going to like... a lot." I say, quite nonchalantly as I open up a treasure chest, loot it and then smash the mimic next to it with a sledgehammer I'd previously looted from one of the cultists.

Bloody things deserve no less."Hmmm... yes, indeed I do have something for you... you can sense it even from all this distance? How interesting."

A black book has been placed into your inventory.

Blinking and then quirking an eyebrow, I once more descend into the shadows as I take said book out of my inventory. Its outside is a black cover made out of human skin, covered with a golden outline but without any form of title."Come now... open it and claim my gift for your own!" The booming voice compels me and I shrug.

"Well, whatever happens, happens." And with that, I open the book, allowing a mass of tendrils to erupt from its pages and tear into my brain."AAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" I scream out loud, promptly attracting every single enemy within a good fifty yards.

You've gained a new ability! - Glory And Death Given to The Crimson Emperor by the fiend of the deep Yyl'rhiad as a welcome back gift, this horrible power is the result of the old one's own experimentation and understanding of Chaos. Glory And Death - Whenever you kill something in a messy way, the residual essence of the slain will infuse itself into your flesh temporarily, healing you for 20% of the killed being's overall health while also increasing strength and agility by 5. (Stackable - 20x)

"Oh my god..." I mutter out as my grin turns savage and I raise my head to see a small army of mobs charging right at me. My eyes grow wide as I scan and re-read the system message five times before shoving myself back into reality...

"Hhahaahaahah...hehehehehe...." My eyes begin to glow as several spells strike against me, reducing my health to near zero once more as I feel myself snapping."Glory...." I whisper, making all of the mobs stop their charge and stare at me in fear as I activate all of my abilities, including my Horrifying Aura, Blood Healing and seeing my two passives reach their full course..

"AND DEATH!" I scream out at the top of my lungs as I charge into the fray, tearing my enemies limb from limb, bone from bone, skin from skin.

"Hey, I think he likes it!" Harold's amused voice echoes in the background as the flayed skull of a death knight flies into the nearby wall.

"Hah! Of course he likes it! I've spent two centuries on that thing!" A set of broken bodies fall to the floor as the screams of my foes thunder throughout the dungeon.

Don't mind me guys and girls! I'm just a line break...

And that would be it for this chapter of EUPHORIA! I sincerely hope that you've enjoyed it.

Not much else to say here... I mean, I've already apologized and stuffs... hope you like Cthulhu myths cause I'm gonna throw a few of those in too! ... Oh wait, I just did. Meh.

Anyway, read and review! And Good Morning/Day/Night to you all! ADIOS FOR NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!