《Binary Progression》Volume 8 - Chapter 19: Fiddlethingie
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JohnWillStab lay on a bench Alex dragged into the garden with his hands crossed behind his head.
Some old, water-soaked poster calling for Zack's capture dirtied the otherwise filthy roads.
"..."
"Eh? Oh shit, we're in this chapter!" he suddenly realised.
John jumped off his bench and onto the grass outside their home.
"Guy! It's happening!" he cried.
The sound of footsteps could be heard sprinting up from the basement and out the front door.
A blood-soaked Bromy just flung it open with a mighty thud.
"Did my package arrive?!" he asked excitedly.
His wide slime slowly sank into a frown as John awkwardly shook his head.
"No... it's... eh... we're getting some screentime... you know... so I thought we could go on an adven-" John was cut off by the sound of the front door shutting.
"Imma be in my basement with the goat, call me if my package arrives..." Bromy called back glumly.
John looked around seeing the same familiar garden, the home they already got used to and the graffiti other guilds left on their walls.
"Damn... what happened to us? Where's everybody's sense of adventure? Where's the excitement?... We didn't have a dick joke in like... ten chapters..."
"Speaking of - I'd like to get mine back..." he moped.
He landed down, reminiscing about his lost friend.
"Is this the residency of a..." the large wolfman looked down to his notepad.
"Bromster?"
"Bromster?... Oh, it's probably Bromy-" he was cut off once again by the slamming of the door.
"Aha!"
Quickly, Bromy snatched the box and opened it right there, throwing the scraps of paper aside into their garden.
"What is that?" John asked, seeing how excited Bromy was to finally get his package.
Bromy shrugged.
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"It's called a Fiddlethingie," he replied.
"..."
"..."
After several seconds of waiting for Bromy to elaborate, John decided to ask again.
"But... what does it do?" he asked.
Bromy breathed a sigh.
"I have no clue."
Bromy picked the item up out of the feather-filled box.
"Let's see..."
"It should have some instructions somewhere..." he muttered, inspecting the device.
Unable to find anything of the sort, he just twisted the cap.
"Oh, it makes hot chocolate..."
"Good to know!"
He remarked, pouring some directly into his mouth before nodded to himself.
"Yep... not hot chocolate... no clue what that is..."
He gestured towards John and the delivery man.
"You guys want a drink?"
His eyes wandered to the back of the item before either could answer his question.
He pulled one of the many little levers attached to the side of the item.
"Oh, it's also a calculator..."
"And a notebook!"
"Ah- c- could just give me a description of what it looks like!?" John pleaded.
Bromy turned towards John questioningly.
"What do you mean? It's a Fiddlethingie..." he explained mockingly.
"It has a cap, gears, levers, button, input panel, sail, combination lock and a squeeze pipe beside the alternation catalyst." he continued.
Creeped out by the logic-defying object, John just kind of walked backwards away from Bromy and into the house.
Inside the guild base, he saw Bonifacius sitting at the table with Foxly.
"Oh, it's them!"
He casually approached the two.
"Hey, what are you guys talking about?" he asked, sitting beside them.
Bonifacius turned towards JohnWillStab.
"Nothing much, friend! We are merely discussing a new piece of equipment!" he exclaimed, pulling out the familiar, yet vague shape of the Fiddlethingie.
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John's grim glare reflected in the side-view mirror attachment of the Fiddlethingie as Bonifacius continued to praise it.
"Tis quite useful! The shield polish feature is great and it can even work as an alarm clock would!" he explained excitedly.
"These things sure are popular..." John remarked uncomfortably.
Foxly nodded.
"Yeah, they're pretty cool, I ate one earlier to see what happened, I just ordered my second one!" he explained.
"I'm sorry what?" John asked.
Foxly smiled smugly.
"It really moistened my insides, plus it gave me an internal massage! You should try it!" he suggested.
"Weren't your insides moistened already?!" John demanded.
Foxly shrugged.
"I dunno, I feel pretty good!"
"This Fiddlethingie business is kind of sketchy... I should investigate!"
John stood up abrupty.
"I must go! Investigate!"
Foxly shrugged.
"Whatever, man."
JohnWillStab shadow-stepped outside of the base.
"Alright, John - let's think about this... Who made these Fiddlethingies?"
John shadow-stepped onto one of the rooves of the many homes in glummington, hoping to get a better view of the city.
"Oh, hey John." Alex greeted, causing John to almost have a heart attack.
"Alex?!"
"What are you doing up here?"
Alex gave him a defeated smile.
"I... eh... wanted to look cool... like in the Felix fight... so I climbed up..."
He was starting to tear up.
"And now I can't get down..." he added.
John couldn't help but smile at Alex's silly antics.
"How long have you been stuck here anyway?" he asked with a muted laugh.
"A month... I think..." he explained.
"..."
"..."
"What?"
Alex nodded.
"I've tried to call you guys, but everybody is busy playing with their new Fiddlethingies..."
John narrowed his eyes.
"Uh-huh... another clue..."
He made a mental note of: "Fiddlethingies linked to abandoned roof people..."
He looked over to Alex.
"Why didn't you just jump off? If you were hurt, Bromy or Crown could have just healed you..."
"..."
Alex smacked his lips a few times.
"Fuck..." he sighed.
John looked away just in time for Alex to stand up and approach the edge of the roof.
"Alright, guess I'll just hop off-..."
"Alright, I need to investigate that whole Fiddlethingies thing..."
"I feel there is something more to this Fiddlethingie thing..."
They both spoke in unison, as John shadow-stepped away into the market square.
Alex now lay on the ground with several broken bones.
"..."
"John...?" Alex called out.
"Buddy... I think I'm going to need some help down here..."
"..."
"John...?"
"..."
He sighed.
Meanwhile, John sped through the city, shadow-stepping from rooftop to rooftop.
"Alright... I have one clue already... Roofs..."
"I need to question some roof owners!"
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