《Everyone's a Catgirl!》Side Quest: Ceres' School of Etiquette
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Ceres hid behind the sweet shop, knees deep in the mud, while she carefully shaped another ball in her hands. The girls were still there, just in front of Mindy’s Tailor Shop, pining over the newest fashions in Sorentina. Expensive silks and skirts from San Island, opulent hats from Nyarlothep. Who cared about that stuff? Not Ceres, that was for sure.
And it’s none of their business whether I care or not.
After a long day of schooling from Nyanny Leona, they’d been released to head straight home. And Ceres would. Just…right after she showed them that it didn’t matter if there was dirt on her knees or cheeks. Who cared if the hem of her skirt was coming loose? They giggled and poked fun without mercy. Ceres stayed silent the whole time, biting her tongue raw. When the sky had opened, and the rain poured during luncheon, she knew she’d get her chance.
While most of Sorentina was well-paved with bricks and stepping stones, a few of the shops hadn’t bothered to maintain their alleyways well. Which made for the perfect mud puddles after a downpour.
The drops had weakened to a gray mist from the dark clouds, but Ceres still had plenty to work with. She grinned at the final ball of mud in her coated hands, then collected all four in her apron. She stood, the brown muck clinging to her shins like a coat of muddy armor, and held tight to the edges of her white pinafore. Her shoes squished through the swamp she made until she reached the edge of the brick road.
“You would look so cute in that dress, Viola,” Winter crooned. “Stripes suit you.”
Viola cupped one dainty hand over her lips and blushed. “Oh! I couldn’t!”
Brianne twirled her umbrella in her hands and spun. “Can you just imagine those shoes with this parasol? Absolutely divine.”
“Too true! Too true!” Titania added.
They sound like tittering old bats. Ceres gritted her teeth and kept her back against the wall, creeping closer and closer on the balls of her feet.
When she’d reached the edge of the shop, she curled her fingers around the first mud ball. The scent of sweet fruit and sugar wafted from the open door to her right, perking her nose and ears. No! Focus! Narrowing her eyes, she wound her arm back…held her breath…then…
Smack!
The first mud ball struck Viola square in the back, exploding all over her blue velvet dress.
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“What in the world?” Viola squealed.
Before they could register what had happened, Ceres snatched another ball and hurled it at Brianne. It found home against the puffed red shoulder of her top, plastering the underside of her umbrella and her hair in brown. She sucked in air with her surprise, abruptly spitting out the mud that came with it.
Titania’s landed squarely against her chest, spreading mud to her face and arms. As for Winter, Ceres poured every prayer for aim into her arm. Winter was the instigator, the heckler, the one who always commented on the state of Ceres’ disarray. For Winter, her ball of mud slammed into her nose, erupting against her face.
Ceres’ adrenaline melted in laughter as she fell to her knees with her hands wrapped around her abdomen. Tears threatened the corners of her eyes while the four girls futilely wiped the mud away from their bodies.
“You should see yourselves!” Ceres cackled, pointing at each of them in turn. “You look ridiculous!”
Brianne shook her parasol, then slowly closed it and turned to face Ceres. “Classless, commoner Ceres,” she hissed. “You’ll never be a lady.”
“Not if I have to look like you,” Ceres retorted, falling into another fit of giggles.
Winter ran the back of her forearm over her eyes, clearing the mud enough so she could see. Flecks of dirt marred her sky-blue hair and ears, and her silver eyes turned to steel. “I will ruin you, Ceres,” she growled. “Come on, ladies!”
She led the charge with a scream. Ceres scrambled to her feet, the adrenaline returning to her veins with the thrill of the chase. She turned heel and fled, clearing the bricks in one wide leap and then landing in the mud. Puddled rain splashed on her skirts, and she laughed as she navigated the mud with ease.
Titania was the first to abandon the chase as soon as she noticed the muddy lake. “S-sorry. Mother would be displeased,” she stammered to her friends.
The other three sped toward Ceres full bore, ignoring the splashing sludge against their knee socks and expensive skirts. But it would take more than going through a little bit of mud to get to Ceres. No one knew the alleys and roads like she did. They’d never catch her. No one could catch her.
Ceres squeezed through narrow openings between shops, dodging across the road and weaving between ladies who offered her a curt word and sour expression. But she didn’t care. She was breathless with excitement, reveling in the shrieks of the three girls behind her. Viola was lost to the crowds, leaving only Winter and Brianne in pursuit.
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The rain was beginning to pick up again, heavy droplets splashing against Ceres’ cheeks and forehead. She welcomed it with open arms, hoping that it may clean at least some of the mud away from her dress and shins. As it was, Mother would be furious. But she could worry about that later. Right now, she needed to get away from Winter and Brianne.
Ceres whipped around the corner of the armor shop, jumping the fence, skidding across the anvil, then skipping through the forge. “Good luck, ladies,” she called over her shoulder.
Brianne stopped at the edge of the anvil and looked dejectedly at Winter. “I may tear my skirts. I’m sorry, Winter.”
“Ceres! You— You bitch!” Winter snarled and hurled herself over the anvil.
“That’s not very lady-like, Winter!” Ceres shouted over her shoulder. Her house wasn’t far now. Mother’s anger would be a lot easier to handle than Winter’s rage. “Better go back to Nyanny Leona!”
A loud growl and a scream erupted from Winter’s throat. “[Freeze]!”
The spell was immediate, binding Ceres’ shoes to the cobblestone. She pitched forward, feet sliding free from her strapped sandals, coming to a skidding stop on her hands and knees. Coarse granite ripped at the soft skin of her shins and calves, the sudden scrapes loud and painful. “You’re not allowed to cast magic, stupid Winter!”
“Don’t you lecture me on rules, you filthy degenerate!” Winter was quickly gaining ground.
Ceres was sure she wouldn’t be so lucky with Winter’s next cast. She scrambled to her feet, ignoring the searing pain in her hands and legs, and made a break for home. The dark green roof was just there in the distance. Just a little longer…
“[Freeze]!” Winter howled.
“[Myana Wall]!” a deep voice bellowed.
Ceres dug her heels into the ground just as her father appeared from behind the baker’s shop. An iridescent shell formed behind her, blocking Winter’s attack with ease.
“What is the meaning of this?” Father barked, looking between Ceres and Winter. “Casting offensive spells in town, Winter? At a civilian?”
“She started it!” Winter squealed, pointing at Ceres. Just as the words escaped her lips, her etiquette teachings struck her like lightning, and she straightened her back. “I-I mean, apologies, Master Janusz, sir. I meant no harm.”
Father looked Ceres over from head to toe, taking in the mud on her arms, legs, and apron. His identical blue eyes narrowed to slits, and his mouth drew into a long, thin line. “Go home, Winter,” he growled.
“Y-yes, sir. Thank you, sir.” Winter bowed over and over again as she vanished from sight.
“Get your shoes, Ceres,” he snapped.
Ceres hummed her reply, all feeling disappearing from her fingers and toes. She jogged to where her shoes had frozen in place, plucking them from an overgrown weed patch. The town’s [Alchemist] was really letting her property go, Ceres thought idly. Her feet were too covered in dirt and grime to slide them comfortably back into her shoes, so she padded across the road in her socks back to her father.
Janusz scowled. “Kurwa! Can you not put all of this…this energy into your studies?”
Ceres flinched. He saved that word for when he was especially angry. “I’m not learning anything. What does it matter how we hem our dresses or which fork goes where? I want to learn something real. Like how to fight!” She whined. “Like what you just did! Then stupid Winter would never think to cast at me again.”
“Enough!” he roared.
Ceres shrank, her ears drooping to the top of her head and her tail tucking between her legs.
“I thought Nyanny Leona would teach you some manners, and you’d behave better. Clearly, I was wrong.” His hands balled into fists, and he looked to the dark sky. “There’s a school of etiquette in Venicia. I hear their program works miracles.”
“Father!” Ceres squeaked. She didn’t want to go to Venicia. Everyone she’d ever met from that city was so…so stuck up! “Please! Let me stay here!”
“No. You’re seven now and grow wilder by the year. I cannot, in good faith, release you to the world like this. That’s final.”
Ceres’ chin dropped to her chest. She studied the stones beneath her stockings. It didn’t matter how much kicking or screaming she did. Father’s word was as good as law. She was sure he’d be taking her to Venicia within the week.
But I will never be like them, she thought defiantly. Never.

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