I gingerly stepped out of the carriage, sparing a glance at Aastor who was still fast asleep. Or unconscious, or meditating. Whatever the specifics of the magical stupor were, they clearly didn’t alert Aastor to Baldric and his merry men, and the man was softly snoring, his peace undisturbed. Baldric, meanwhile, had begun to direct his associates to surround the carriage, and four scrawny looking ruffians were encircling us.

They honestly needn’t have bothered. I had nothing on my person that could be considered valuable, and the only thing I owned that might be considered dangerous was Kel. And even then, she was fast asleep, and was more useful as a projectile or a distraction than anything else. Certainly, I had no idea how to actually use Kel to cast magic.

“Most gracious of you to exit the carriage. Now, if you wouldn’t mind…” Baldric pulled out a length of rope, and tapped his foot on a patch of dirt. “Kneel down here, and let me tie you up. It’ll be quick, and on my honor as a villain, I’ll let someone in the next village know you’re trapped here.”

“Bit of an oxymoron, isn’t it?” I half expected to choke before the words came out, but the System didn’t pop up with a reprimand. I guess the speech restriction only applies to my Employer? “Honor as a Villain, I mean. Do you get a lot of people taking you up on that offer?”

“More than you’d expect.” Baldric shrugged and smiled, his brilliant white teeth flashing in the dim light of the torches his gang was holding. “Come now, we don’t need to make this uncivilized, do we?”

Okay, time for some basic analysis. Five people was more than I could handle easily at this point. I didn’t really know how strong any one of them was, but five could just bum-rush me and overpower me before I could do anything about it. It would be far, far too chaotic. I also didn’t know any magic. If I did, I could have tried to cast Temporal Rewind as I fought, or could have buffed myself, or something like that. I did have a pretty significant buff from As You Command already but it would be silly to rely on a 20% buff to take on five people.

Fighting was out. Fleeing would almost certainly cause me to fail the Quest, and while failing Quests was in itself not a big deal, I really didn’t like the sound of having to pay a penalty for failure. As You Command was obviously a double-edged sword. Moreover, completely a Quest was a good way to get some more information on the new updates in the system. After all, the mention of rewards had been conspicuously absent from the Quest Dialog, which was a pretty big departure from how things had functioned in previous versions. I wanted to see what I’d get if I was successful.

So, Finesse then. As far as I could tell, Butlers were good at talking. At least, it seemed like the class had some kind of affinity for conversation and negotiation. The most I could do was try to distract the bandits, maybe buy some time so I could figure something else out.

Hey, cut me some slack! I’m not exactly a genius, and sometimes, buying time is the best plan I can come up with.

“No, of course not. No need to be uncivilized.” I raised my palms up in a conciliatory manner, and walked over towards the spot that Baldric had indicated at. “Leave my Employer and me alone, unhurt, and you can have the carriage.”

Clearly being a cutthroat, buccaneer or rapscallion did not give one any kind of buff to observational skills. Baldric puffed his chest out, and was halfway through tying me before one of his ruffians asked the obvious question.

“Hey, where are the horses?”

“What?” Baldric had been busy tying me up, and doing a pretty good job of it if the pain in my midriff was anything to go by. “In front of the…Oh.”

I mean, they'd stopped the carriage. From the front. How none of these dolts noticed that the carriage was horseless, I will never understand. Baldric’s face had a look of frustration on it, as though he was sure someone was playing a practical joke on him, and when he found the prankster, he’d wring their neck.

“Well, how does it run then?” He shouted out at the ruffian who had pointed out the lack of horses, as any bad boss will do when they’ve been caught unawares. Terrible party leadership skills.

“How should I know? Do I look like I rode in on this thing?” The man shouted back as he continued to examine the carriage. Looking for invisible horses, no doubt, but I was fairly sure that there weren’t any. “Ask the boy!”

“I was just about to, Chanak! Don't give me orders!” Baldric turned and looked at me, and I swear, I could see his mustache twitch a little bit. “Well sir, if you’ll kindly tell us how to use this here vehicle, we’ll be on our way.”

“Ah, of course. It’s Spark-operated.” I calmly fibbed.

There were a lot of ways for this plan to fail. First of all, it was completely possible that my made up story was true, and that the carriage really was Spark operated (whatever that meant). In which case, it was also possible that Baldric and his goons knew exactly how to make it work, and would kick Aastor out of the carriage and drive away in it. Or at least, they’d wake him up, he’d likely put some terrible curse on them, and I’d fail the sub-quest.

But I was really banking on Baldric not knowing enough about Sparks and their inner workings. He didn’t strike me as the genuinely intelligent type, more like a highwayman who had dreams of becoming a robber-baron. Hopefully, in his flustered state, he’d accept my explanation, especially with a little bit of flattery.

“It’s one of the new models, Mr. Baldric. I’m sure a man of your stature is well-versed in the advancements that the S.R.C. has been making?”

Up close, frustrated and annoyed, Baldric wasn’t really as handsome as he was at a distance. The warm air and the humidity of the torches was causing a thin sheen of sweat on his face, and he was clearly disgruntled by this entire affair.

“The…S.R.C.?” He repeated slowly, trying to put the pieces together so he wouldn't look incompetent in front of his team.

“The Spark Resear-”

“THE SPARK RESEARCH CENTER! Ah, yes of course! The S.R.C., as all civilized folk call it.” Baldric brusquely interrupted me as soon as the answer was obvious. I just inclined my head. “Yes, of course.”

Had I been tied up before? Yes. And when you’re tied up and outnumbered, the best course of action is to either co-operate, or look like you are. Baldric was either new to being a bandit, or he had a new team with him. Either way, there was some conflict there, and Baldric needed to cement his stature as a leader they could all follow. He wanted respect, and he wanted to play up the noble, Robin Hood-esque thief. I could use that to at least distract him.

I didn’t say anything, waiting for him to speak up. I want to say it was because I had some deep psychological reason, but I was just trying to come up with more plausible lies for the questions he was going to ask me soon.

“So….how does it work?”

“Ah, do pardon me, Mr. Baldric. I’m afraid I haven’t the faintest idea. The function of the carriage is the domain of my Employer, who is currently asleep.”

“The function of the-Well then, go wake him up! Pronto, boy, it’s already late.”

“Of course. Would one of you kind people help me up? Mr. Baldric has done an excellent job at physically restraining me, and as a consequence I can no longer get to my feet.”

“Chanak, stop looking under the carriage for God’s sake. You’re embarrassing me! It’s from an S.R.C. dammit, it’s not going to be that obvious.” Baldric shouted out for the same ruffian who’d kindly informed him of the missing horses. “Get the boy on his feet.”

Huh, guess the Spark Research Centers had a bit of a reputation. Were they like a Craftsmen’s Guild and a University rolled into one?

Chanak came over, and helped me up. He was a scrawny looking man, all lean muscle and bone. Unlike Baldric, he was dressed in old, well-worn leather gear, and didn’t seem particularly chatty. He hoisted me up, while Baldric continued to point his rapier at me. I couldn’t blame him. If I saw a strangely well spoken boy in a carriage I was going to rob, I’d be wary too.

“Go with him, make sure he doesn’t do something stupid.”

Chanak grunted at the order, and began to follow me to the carriage.

I slowly made my way to the carriage, and then, as if pondering a request, slowed down and turned around.

“Ah, but-No, nevermind.”

Turn back around, take another step. Gotta really act this one up, Baldric seems like a sucker for this kind of stuff. And pause…and turn.

“Excuse me, may I make a request?”

Chanak looked like he might hit me, but Baldric spoke out before he could.

“Of course. What can Baldric the Buccaneer do for you?”

“Well Ladies and Gentlemen, it’s late. As you’ve no doubt seen, my Employer is an old man. Practically ancient, some might say. Perhaps you would deign to let him sleep just until sunrise?”

Baldric looked over to one of the hitherto unnamed ruffians and directed a question at her. “Just an old man in there?”

She nodded, but the look on her face indicated that she didn’t exactly feel like acquiescing to the request.

“It would be most courteous of you, Mr. Baldric. And I’m sure a baron such as yourself wouldn’t extend a discourtesy to your guests.” I was laying it on thick, but it had been working well so far. Baldric wasn’t the sharpest tack, but he really was underestimating us wasn’t he?

“Well, let it never be said that Baldric, Suave Rapscallion, is discourteous! Very well, Sir, your request has been granted.” Baldric smiled, and it seemed like he was happy to be in control of the situation again. “Chanak, Ellem, get some boulders out in front of the carriage, make sure it doesn’t move. Balthazar, help me set up a fire. Ilyana, be a dear and start cooking will you? Ellem, you get first watch.”

He clapped his hands, and even though everyone was shooting disgruntled glances his way, they began to follow orders. Baldric was holding on to the mantle of leadership, even if only by a thread.

Ellem was the woman who had entered the carriage and seen Aastor sleeping inside. She had greenish skin, and was tall, over 7 feet at least. If she hadn’t been as thin as the other ruffians around her, I’d have described her as well-built, but as it was, she kind of looked like a beanpole. Still, between her and Chanak, they managed to haul a few large boulders that they had clearly already prepared and began to place them around the carriage, blockading it from moving in any direction. Okay, so a new problem to solve. I’d have to get around to it.

At least I’d bought some time.