《Leftover Apocalypse》065: A Lively Debate

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My head felt like it had been stuffed with sawdust. I was awake, actually awake, and for the first time could really feel the stiffness of my joints after being tied up and thrown around. I stretched, put on my boots and the strap for Mister Creepy, and then took a second to think about my mana. It was basically gone. The divination trick wasn't super expensive, but I'd had to keep it up the whole time Mister Creepy was cutting because up-close work with a knife was hard for a spider. On top of that I hadn't been at full charge anyway, since making mana pool in an enclosed vehicle was pretty much impossible.

Hugh had glanced in one other time, but thankfully he hadn't tugged on any of the ropes and apparently I looked pretty normal from over at the door. I'd thought about trying to wake up and warn him the Behemoth was coming, but I couldn't imagine he was likely to believe me. How would the Behemoth have found us? Wasn't it a bit too convenient that as soon as he tied me up I had a pressing reason to be set free? And I didn't actually know when or if it was happening anyway.

Since I hadn't developed any combat magic - yet, I did have some imminent plans - the only thing I could think to do with my last bit of mana was a little reconnaissance. First, to make sure I didn't waste time after turning the divination on, I pinged the fate threads so I knew which direction Errod and Katrin were in. It had gotten to the point that I could tell which threads were theirs instantly, though I couldn't say why. I took a deep breath and hopped back into my head, immediately using divination and then diving through the wall of the wagon. The clock was running.

Hugh was smoking a pipe between the wagons as the moskar rested, and he didn't show any sign of getting up and charging over to stop me. I hopped through the other wagon - the mana usage ticked upwards as I put another wall between my perception and my body - and I could see Errod and Katrin. Katrin was awake, but her hands were practically mummified and her mouth was gagged; Hugh was doing everything he could to make it harder for her to cast spells. Her eyes looked unfocused, so she was probably still feeling a little loopy. Either she'd had more of the mushrooms than I had, or it was just hitting her worse.

I thought that Errod was asleep at first, but then I saw that he was very subtly working on loosening the knots on his wrist by contorting his left hand around to pick at the ropes. It was awkward as hell, and I didn't think he was going to be able to pull it off. I didn't see my knives or Katrin's spellbook or any of the swords, so either Hugh had dumped them somewhere - which felt unlikely - or he had just stashed everything someplace inconvenient. And that was about all I had time to think about before I had to give up and step back out into the real world.

Katrin and Errod were still tied up, I had no proper weapons, Hugh was for sure way more of a badass than me, and it was unclear what my end goal was - get away? Tie up Hugh? Force him to have a conversation with us? Regardless, I didn't see any benefit to sitting around. He would be sure to check on me again before he got the wagons moving or went to sleep or whatever - if he was even planning on sleeping - and so it was vital to just seize the moment. I had just the smallest trickle of mana left, so the best thing to do seemed to be a delivery - I strapped the little knife onto Mister Creepy and went to the window, then threw him like a frisbee at the other wagon.

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He didn't hit it of course, since there had been no room for me to wind up properly or even really aim, but he landed fairly close which would limit how much mana I'd need to use. I waited a few minutes to make sure Hugh wasn't watching, then took control and carefully navigated my spider drone under the wagon, up the wheel, and to the window on the far side. I wasn't able to use divination obviously, so I just had Mister Creepy's extremely nearsighted vision to navigate by. I ran him down to Errod and got the handle of the knife to his fingers before closing the connection with the tiniest sliver of mana left. It would have to be good enough, there was no way I would be able to keep watching.

I grabbed a fork and a regular kitchen knife - not at all good for cutting ropes but better than my fists in a fight - and then stashed the control band for Mister Creepy in my bed in the hopes that I could use it again if I got caught. Fingers crossed Errod would think to hide the spider after cutting himself free. The last thing I really wanted before the inevitable confrontation was a way to coordinate with Katrin and Errod, but odds were once they got moving it would be very audible.

I had the thought, for a moment, that I could just slip away while they caused a distraction for me. Hugh would be kept busy, and I could sneak off in a random direction so that by the time he re-captured the others and got them secured it would be too late. For a good thirty seconds I mulled that plan over - even idly grabbing a water skin and some rations - before some little part of my brain cleared its throat.

"Do you think," it asked metaphorically, "that maybe abandoning your friends is a shitty thing to do?"

"Well," I replied to the imaginary conversation, "they'd be fine probably and anyway I'm the only one that Hugh is really after. And I could always meet back up with them later by following the fate lines."

"So then is it possible he'd hold on to them so he could capture you when you came to rescue them?"

"I could wait until he decided I wasn't coming."

"Ah, so you'd leave them as prisoners for... how long, exactly?"

I sighed at myself. Okay, yeah, it was maybe a low empathy day. I left the water and rations in my bag though, because even if I was going to do the right thing and stay with them we might all have to bolt depending on how things went. With that thought in mind, I also packed a few other items like a change of clothes and my money pouch, then I stood by the door to the wagon and felt nervous. I thought I heard something, but it was so quiet I wasn't sure if it was just my imagination. I carefully stepped over to the window and sure enough, Hugh was very slowly standing. Shit.

I decided I wanted him to come for me first, since I wasn't certain the others were free yet and I didn't want them to get stopped halfway out. But I didn't want to just throw myself out there or he'd kick my ass, so the only thing left was to make a little noise. I looked around and suddenly had a terrible, wonderful idea. I wasn't sure it would work, but once the thought was in my head I had to try. I got the fork into position and smacked it with a wooden mug a few times, the thudding itself surprisingly quiet but the squeak of metal pins shifting probably audible from outside. I hoped Hugh wouldn't realize what I was specifically doing.

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I heard his soft footsteps on the stair outside and felt the wagon shift just slightly, and braced myself. This trick relied on some rather loose construction standards, and would be a close one for sure even if I pulled it off. As nervous as I was, though, I was grinning in anticipation. Finally the doorknob turned, and braced in the tiny space between the door and cupboard I kicked with all my strength. The door only opened inwards, normally, but with both hinge pins removed the way it was designed the entire door could be knocked out into Hugh's stupid mustache.

I heard him grunt in surprise and fall backwards, and then I jumped out of the wagon and landed on the door - smushing Hugh under me before falling awkwardly off and failing to do a cool roll. The door, much to my surprise, launched into the air and out of sight as Hugh popped to his feet like a gymnast in their prime. There was a little blood trickling out of one nostril, but otherwise he looked totally uninjured. Great.

"Very good, Calliope Smith. But I? I need no door."

A wall of force slammed into me and threw me backwards, and as I landed my head bounced off the packed dirt. I cursed, and Hugh tsked at me.

"Do not complain of your pain in front of enemies unless you are lying," he said, "and also toughen up, I did that very gently."

It certainly hadn't felt gentle from my end, but having seen what Hugh could do I had to admit to myself he was probably using kid gloves; if he'd wanted to he could have hammered me into the ground like a nail. He walked towards me slowly, and stopped still out of range for me to kick him.

"If you fight this, I might injure you worse than needed. I would hate for that to happen, even if we could get it healed later. It was a good escape attempt, and you should feel proud of your effort. Now surrender."

The door to the other wagon swinging open was the sweetest sound I had ever heard.

"Shit," Hugh said, and jumped backwards just as the air where he'd been standing rippled. "You missed me, Katrin! You need to practice smaller targets, it's not just the huge jungle monsters you will be fighting, yes?" He was jumping around, not staying still long enough for her to aim properly. Errod circled around, trying to keep Hugh between the three of us, and I stood and retrieved the fork I'd dropped.

"Errod, your skills are improving but you're not ready to fight a retired royal guardsman. That, and you do not have a sword."

"I know. I was hoping we could talk this out."

"Certainly, if your sister stops casting spells at me."

Katrin raised her arms over her head and everyone just... stopped. It wasn't fake, or tense. All three of them clearly felt confident the fight was on pause. Of course that left me standing there like an idiot - crouching in a shitty fighting stance like the world's scrawniest linebacker. Wielding a fork. I straightened up, but I didn't put down the cutlery.

"I will listen to the terms for your surrender, yes?"

Errod smiled. "I appreciate that, but I was hoping you'd just apologize for drugging us and let us go."

"Ah. Those terms are unacceptable I am afraid. You have concerns about Lord Protector Hammersmith, but she does not have the luxury of telling entitled children military secrets or letting vital assets run wild. She has a war to win, and if I understand correctly you are the only way for her to get troops to where the last of Hallenvar's forces wait."

He still didn't know about the doomsday device. That was something.

"Hugh, that whole place is cursed. They can't live there forever. Just think of it as a siege, so long as Hammersmith holds the points of entry she wins eventually regardless. And we're going to go help the troops get in, there's just something we have to do first."

And I genuinely wasn't too worried about the doomsday thing. There were three chances to get in there before the end of the world - four if you counted the day of - and it actually seemed unlikely the device would work this time around anyway. They'd been cut off from their supply chain a whole year earlier, that Ulren guy that had helped him build it got blown up by Callie, and the Eldred Empire was in way better shape.

"And what is it, that is so important?"

Errod looked at me, I looked at Katrin, and Katrin nodded.

"Okay, so. The wild mage, that was helping Telen and the Behemoth follow us? She's on our side now, I talked to her about it. She's... kind of family? We have the same mother, it's complicated. She wanted me dead, but it was a misunderstanding and now we're going to help her end a spell that's on both of us and get her home."

Hugh shook his head, a little condescending for my tastes. "Had there been a harmful spell on you, Lord Protector Hammersmith would have -"

"Nope. No. Because you know what? She knew someone had messed with my memories and didn't tell me or try to fix it. And she knew that I was... different... and didn't tell me which has directly led to us getting attacked and my sister getting killed."

"Your - the wild mage?"

I sighed, still feeling the headache from the mushrooms. "Different sister. I mean... Neither one was my sister in the normal way, but... Hugh, there's a lot of crazy shit going on that I don't want to explain to more people than I need to. For now, if you won't believe Hammersmith is putting us in danger by keeping secrets trust me that she might also not know about this spell. It's powerful stuff, old stuff, and it's tied to fate which nobody can see."

"But you know it's there, yes?"

"Yes. There's a professor in Sentortzi that's an expert on fate magic, we talked to him before and that's why we wanted to go back there."

"And if she still wants you dead? You've now stepped out of the wagon. It is dark, still, and there are few landmarks, but if they are clever enough they might have enough to come after us."

"Okay so bad news on that, actually."

Katrin and Errod looked at me in confusion, while Hugh just looked annoyed. "It turns out that before we got on the boat the wild mage passed a message along to the Behemoth and so he's looking for us. He knows where we got off the boat, and where we were heading, but not where we're at right now. She says she'll send him a fake tip to get him off our trail now that I... apologized... but he was probably pretty close to us. Presumably he wasn't just relying on her intel, so he might have a diviner or someone that can fly or something. Actually now that I mention it, a flying dude for sure got away last time we dealt with them."

"All the more reason to get you safely to Lord Protector Hammersmith," Hugh said.

"But you can't keep us tied up and drugged. Either we'll keep escaping, or we'll be totally helpless in an attack."

"You are already helpless in an attack, Calliope Smith."

"Your nose would say otherwise."

"Hah! So show me - come at me with that fork and we can see what you would do against a more skilled and more powerful opponent."

"You're being kind of a dick, Hugh."

"And the Behemoth would be kind to you, yes? Much like your new friend and long lost relative that has tried to kill you at least twice?"

I walked towards Hugh, not bothering to get into a fighting stance. I dropped the fork, and pulled out the kitchen knife so I could drop that too.

"Oh, it is hand to hand now? You would wrestle me, Calliope Smith?"

I stuck my hands out, wrists together. "No, dumbass. Tie me up. Keep me prisoner. But let the others be prepared, since they're not... helpless. Okay? I'm serious, shit is coming. But we both know you can't trust me not to try something tomorrow once I get antsy, so tie me up and get it over with."

He stepped closer, eyebrow raised, clearly waiting for me to do something stupid - which was fair. In point of fact I needed him a little closer and even then it would be tricky, but I had some hope. He leaned in to grab me, I threw my head forward to headbutt him, and he launched me twenty feet back with an open palm shove. He must have felt the tug on his belt, because I heard him curse as I landed with his sword in my hand.

"I knew it was a trick," Hugh said with a smile, "but I made the wrong guess about your goal. You are armed now, Calliope Smith - is it time for us to fight?"

I laughed. "How stupid do you think I am? There's a reason I made sure Errod and Katrin were loose before I hit you with that door." And I tossed the sword to Errod, who caught it in his left hand and passed it to his right. "You're still stronger than us, but Errod has been getting pretty good and Katrin has some nasty spells. And you can't hurt me, which means you're at a disadvantage."

Hugh sighed, and looked at me with pity. "Oh, Calliope. You have forgotten something very important. You purchased a healing device, which is fully charged. That means I only need to prevent myself from killing you, not from harming you."

"Oh. Right. But you're actually a big softie, and would never injure your charming friend Calliope. Right?"

He shook his head sadly, and charged at me full speed. I knew very little about his actual abilities - he could send people twenty feet into the air with a punch, jump very high, slow down arrows. He'd hit me with that wall of force a moment ago. It did seem like his main use of magic was to enhance his natural motion rather than the other stuff so priority one was keeping him from laying a hand on me.

I ran a few steps and dove for the wagon, but he moved like lightning and grabbed my ankle. With a single swing he threw me twenty feet into the other wagon and I could tell immediately my leg was dislocated and my ribs were - at a minimum - badly fractured. Hugh wasn't playing around. Lightning struck at his feet as he jumped aside, and he chuckled.

"Katrin, are you missing on purpose? That is very sweet, yes?"

Errod darted in at the last second to stand between me and Hugh as he approached, and much to my surprise he actually swung the sword. Hugh, casually, smacked it aside with such force that Errod nearly dropped it.

"Remember the potato, Errod," he said, "your enemy is always armed. Katrin, would your aim improve if I broke your brother's arms?"

A beam of pure heat slammed into Hugh... and flickered out. "Ah, so the threat alone is enough. Good to know."

Katrin looked shocked, clearly unsure why her attack had fizzled after barely singeing Hugh's shirt. I scrambled to my feet as Errod took another swing, which was deflected with Hugh's bare hands just like the last one. I'd kept a barely measurable amount of mana, and I decided to spend it - for just a second the fate lines snapped into view before vanishing. It had been enough, though - Katrin had one leading from her to a spot at the front of the wagon I'd been in. That would be her spellbook, and presumably the rest of our hidden equipment.

As soon as I took a step there was an awful crunching pop that I felt through my whole body, but then my leg was thankfully back in its proper spot and I could hobble towards our gear. I heard an explosion behind me as Katrin kept up her attack, but I didn't have time to look. Thankfully Hugh was still commenting on everything.

"Yes, very smart. If your enemy cannot be hit directly, the ground at his feet is often a smart target."

I lifted the little seat at the front of the wagon and everything was there - Errod's sword, the lightning sword, the spellbook, my knives. I grabbed my bandolier and immediately flung a knife at Hugh, hitting him in the calf - I'd been aiming for the knee, but that was close enough. He screamed and then punched Errod, presumably to give himself a bit more space so he could deal with the knife. Errod landed awkwardly twenty feet back but didn't look particularly hurt. Hugh pulled the knife out and flung it towards me at what seemed to be the speed of light - it hit the wagon an inch from me like a bullet, burying itself all the way into the wood. Sweet Jesus.

A ribbon of energy began to tie Hugh up, but he launched himself directly into Katrin and it dissipated as she was crushed between him and the wagon. He didn't even pause, zipping over to Errod as he began to stand and yanking the sword away.

"This is mine, I believe. Are we nearly finished playing? None of that, Calliope."

That last comment seemed to be in reference to the other knife I'd just thrown, which had stopped mid-air before reaching Hugh. It fell to the ground, and he placed a foot on it so Errod couldn't grab it.

"I challenge you," Errod said, "to a duel. Just the two of us."

"Ah, a duel. With honor, yes? But Errod, you must learn that honor is not for combat. Honor is for your daily life among society. In combat, you win at any cost."

Hugh spun and knocked Katrin's arm aside with a gesture, causing her to shoot lightning harmlessly off into the sky.

"Is that why you won't do it? You know I could win one on one?"

"Hah! Goading your opponent, good. Poke at insecurities, make them do something foolish."

He turned and caught the sword I had thrown, then scowled as Errod caught the other one. "You threw him both, eh? That should not have worked."

Errod swung at Hugh's legs, forcing him back, and then hopped to his feet. Katrin looked annoyed, probably trying to think of what she could try that wouldn't fry her brother in such close quarters - she really needed to get her hands on a less destructive spellbook.

Hugh and Errod began sword fighting for real, and I circled around behind Hugh to look for the right moment to strike.

The attacks were speeding up, from both sides, and I could finally see just how far Errod had come in the past few months. Hugh was still better, there was no doubt - he hit harder too, with his force magic assisting - but Errod was genuinely making him pay attention. When he found an opening and stabbed at Errod's side the blade bounced away, blocked by Katrin's shield spell. At the same moment I threw another knife and scored a hit on the back of his shoulder, making him stumble.

"Much better, work as a team!"

The little teacher-y remarks were getting on my nerves. Was this a game? A test? Or did he just want us to think so, so that we would go easy on him? But then, didn't we want to go easy on him anyway? It was Hugh, not some monster. Surely neither side wanted to actually... I suddenly had a horrible idea. Still limping slightly, I ran towards Hugh as he danced in circles with Errod, easily parrying most attacks but looking like he was finally having to actually think about it. Katrin continued to shield Errod and even briefly went on the offensive, but Hugh dodged and swung at Errod simultaneously and since she was already casting a spell she couldn't put a shield up - Errod winced as he took a vicious hit in the upper arm.

I wasn't far from them but it was more than just getting close - I had to be right up in the fight to strike at Hugh, without getting in Errod's way or blocking Katrin's line of sight. But when I saw my opening, I knew it. Jumping in right as Hugh thrust, I forced him to stab me in the stomach. A little extreme, sure, but it worked exactly as I had planned. Hugh recoiled, shocked, and let his guard down long enough for Errod to swing - he switched to the flat of his blade at the last second, but the edge still sliced Hugh's cheek a little as it hit. For my part, I'd grabbed his leg as I fell and caused him to almost fall. Off balance, hit in the face with a nice heavy sword, a little injured from other hits, and trying to figure out how to not kill the idiot wrapped around his leg, Hugh was in no position to dodge the spell that came in and bound his torso in shimmering threads of energy. He went down in a heap.

"Calliope Smith, what do you think that you are doing!" he yelled.

"Winning, Hugh. You said it yourself, we have healing on hand."

He sputtered for a second, and then it slowly turned to chuckling. "Hah! Fine, yes. You win, now go heal yourself. I will behave, you made your point. Ridiculous children." he sighed, then looked up at Errod. "You still telegraph your attacks too much. And tell your sister I wasn't kidding about practicing her aim. Now, the next time you are fighting someone with force magic, you will need to..."

I missed the rest, as Katrin helped me to the healing bed. She didn't look amused, but she didn't scold me. I laid down in the bed and felt energy flowing through me, first an initial burst to seal up anything vital and then the slower waves of mana that would do the more detailed repairs. It would take a little while, and it would hurt the whole time - but damn it, I won. And it was worth losing a little blood.

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