《Blut und Eisen: Blood and Iron》S2 E03: Tree is a Crowd
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Sakura petals danced through the air as the two girls stood facing opposite one another, tiny hands clenched into fists in preparation for their apocalyptic battle to come. They gazed steadily at one another, all bonds of sisterhood and their unique connections as twins were severed, cast out as they raised their hands above their heads, each determined to strike down the other with all the murderous intent that comes from being raised in a Samurai family.
As the wind settled down, only a lone sakura petal drifted in between the two half-sized warriors, an unspoken signal to begin their duel.
"EEEEEII!", with a wild girlish shout, the twins began their attack sequence, tiny fists pumping down four times like the sword strokes of a skilled kendoka , to the words of an ancient Japanese battle cry.
"Saisho wa Guu !", They chanted together.
"Jan Ken PON", the twins both revealing their hands on the final syllable; Scissors.
However they continued with, "Aiko deSHO !", to restart the combat cycle, unveiling their hands with Masumi scoring the first critical strike; Paper conquered Rock.
"Acchi muite HOI !", Masumi commanded like a Daimyo , pointing in one direction, but nevertheless, Mayumi defied her by facing the opposite.
This initiated a new sequence, "Jan Ken PON! ", With Masumi thrusting forward; Scissors slashing Paper.
"Acchi muite HOI !" Masumi repeated, but once again, Mayumi proved to be sharp, her eyes registering the direction her sister was about to point to by the minute twitching of Masumi's finger. Again Mayumi refused to bow down, tilting her head upwards in contrast to her sister's commands.
"Jan Ken PON! ", This time both forced into a stalemate by their hammer blows; Rock futilely smashing against Rock.
"Aiko deSHO !", But nevertheless Masumi once again had the upper hand; Rock breaking Scissors.
"Acchi muite HOI !", Mayumi continuing to show resistance… But it was all part of her plan.
"Jan Ken PON!", Realising now was the time to strike, Mayumi began her counterattack with a brilliant repeat of Masumi's first victory; Paper conquering Rock.
"Acchi muite HOI !", It was Mayumi's turn to cry out her command and pointing to Masumi's right…her twin did as was told, caught in the fatal rhythm that she herself had fallen into by repeatedly facing in the direction her finger bided Mayumi to.
"YATTA!" Mayumi cried out in victory.
"Ehhhhh", her sister complained, "You always do that to me!"
"Hohoho!" Mayumi placed her hands on the side of her hips, "then you should learn from your mistakes by now"
"Buuuu, nee-san hidoi !"
"Maa maa", trying to placate her twin, "I will let you have a wish since you will become a nii-chan from now on"
"…honto ?"
"Un", Mayumi replied in confirmation.
"…Then I will be a boy… But you must always be by my side, nee-san …"
"…MOOOU…!", Mayumi squealed, "You are sooooo cuuute. Masumi, Daisuki !", hugging her twin tightly.
"Ya-yameteeee !", Masumi cried as they both tumbled into the grass, the two girls laughing as they looked up into the branches of the family tree, sakura petals floating down to land upon their disheveled kimonos.
When they had quietened down, Mayumi continued to gaze silently at the drifting petals before she sat up suddenly and turned to look down at her sister. Untying one of the red ribbons from her hair, Mayumi signalled to Masumi and they slowly stood up together, solemnly tying the ribbon around their pinkies. Looking into each other's eyes as they understood what was required of each of them, the twins began reciting a ritual hundreds of years old, in a singsong voice.
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"Yubi kiri genman
Uso tsuitara
Hari sen bon nomasu
Yubi kitta !"
The girls smiled to one another happily.
"I will always be by your side, Masumi"
"Un… I know, nee-san "
Only the rustling of the branches, the sakura tree beared witness to this sacred oath.
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INTRO SONG: Trust Me
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Mayumi’s party of unwilling retainers… *cough* ‘friends’, were on the other side of the marketplace, wandering from stall to stall as the girls looked out for bargains or anything that catches their eye. Whether this will translate into an actual purchase… Max just shrugged as he thought to himself, ‘This is almost like shopping with mum’, while giving an internal sigh. ‘Actually, this is EXACTLY like shopping with mum’, correcting himself.
“Max”, Lorelei asked in curiosity, “What are they doing?”
Eyeing the girls with boredom and DEFINITELY standing out of earshot, he replied, “What the women species have been doing for centuries, Lori”, stretching his arms over his head and yawning widely, “window shopping”
“… But, I don’t see any windows…?”
“It’s metaphorically speaking, Lori”
“Ohhh”, Lorelei said as though in understanding, for some reason Max was able to imagine her nodding her cute head, “….what’s metaphorically…?”
“… I think I need to take a course in university to teach…”, He felt a drop of sweat slid down the side of his head, “Lori… do you want to go to school?”
“School?”
“Yup”, Max thought quickly, “It’s what all normal people do to learn about the ‘world’ before they are thrown out to fend for themselves”
“…uuuu… I don’t want to get thrown out!”
“Nonono”, Max tried to calm Lorelei down, “You can join my ‘Max’s School for Lori Association’ or MSLA for short. I will never throw you out”, he assured her.
“Max, who are you talking to?”, Mayumi asked from the front… while squatting down and gazing up mischievously at him.
“…Y-you… How long have you been there?”, Danger bells instantly waking, going into full alert and ringing in his head. The battleship, Max Unsinkable, began doing evasive manoeuvres with Helmsman Max struggling with the wheel.
Mayumi smiled sweetly, “Since”, batting her eyelids prettily, “’Lori… do you want to go to school?’”
“…”
“…”
Helmsman Max shouted out to Ship Captain Max, “She can’t make it captain! The ship is labouring in the water!”. “Try damn it!”, Ship Captain Max roared, “We got to evade or we are sunk!”
Max gave a little cough as he said, “Eh-Ehhh? I was merely rehearsing for a play my drama club is performing soon for university orientation”. The Max Unsinkable did a full 90 degree turn, and the crew watched the torpedoes painted with Mayumi’s terrifyingly happy face come perilously close…
“Ooooh. Now that makes sense”, Mayumi nodded.
The crew of the Max Unsinkable did a wild cheer as the torpedoes missed their mark, sailing harmlessly past them. “Good work, Helmsman”, Ship Captain Max patted the back of Helmsman Max, “You have saved us all”.
“Y-yeah!”, Max laughed unnaturally, “See, I am being a normal human being”
“Ahh”, Mayumi smiled, “Then is the play called, ‘Max’s School for Lori Association’ or MSLA for short?”
“Guuuh!”, Max clutched his heart from the critical strike. Unnoticed to the crew of the Max Unsinkable… the torpedoes were homing underwater missiles! The ship rocked as multiple impacts were felt along the hull, water flooding in along the compartments and violently drowning the ship’s despairing crew.
“And I thought you told me you were in the Historical Blacksmithing Club?”, Mayumi continuing her merciless assault.
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“Captain!”, Helmsman Max cried, “We have got to abandon ship!”.
“Nay”, Ship Captain Max sadly shook his head, “A captain always goes down with his ship”.
“... then I will remain with you captain”.
“N-no! Save yourself!”.
“I can’t leave without you sir… It has been a pleasure serving with you”.
“… And I you, Helmsman”.
“Sir… I have always lo-..”. The ship exploded, shearing into two halves right in the middle as the ammunition magazine finally ignited, before the craft disappeared beneath the waves. The Max Unsinkable… had sunk with all hands.
“… uuuuu…”, Max wept, “I am sorry for not being normal”, realising it was futile to pretend that what he was doing wasn’t strange.
“Maa maa”, Mayumi stood gracefully back up before rising on her tiptoes to peck him on the cheek, “Normal is overrated”, she stuck her tongue out cutely at him.
“… I don’t know whether to be cheered up or depressed…”, Max said as he lightly touched the spot where her lips were. ‘They felt nice and warm’, he thought dreamily.
“Anyway”, Mayumi grabbed his hand and dragged him forcefully behind her, “since Masumi is not here, you can help me pick my clothes”
“Clothes?”, Max eyed the stalls incredulously, “But all they sell are furs”
“Fufu”, Mayumi chuckled evilly, “That’s where you are wrong, oh virgin-kun”
“WHO ARE YOU CALLING A VIRGIN!”, before he slammed his mouth shut… but it was too late… all the onlookers were staring at him, the expressions on their faces were one of acute pity. One of the Elves even walked up to him and gave Max two pieces of fruit, “To share”, the Elf man said, and another came to give him a piece of jewellery saying, “Hope this brings you luck tonight”, patting Max on the back.
“See”, Mayumi smiled, “There is nothing wrong with being a virgin, VIRGIN-kun”
“… Can I be downgraded back to gopher?” Max asked tearfully.
“Only if I like what you help me to choose”, she promised.
“O-ok!”, Max patted his chest, “My heart is ready!”, as Mayumi disappeared into a booth with a waiting Lydia, closing the curtains behind them.
A minute later, after excessive giggling from within the curtains by the two girls, the long dark pieces of clothe parted to reveal first Lydia… and Max’s jaw dropped.
“Y-y-y-you!”, Max yelled, “What are you wearing?!”
Lydia came out in a two piece fur bikini, the white fur bra struggling against her ample chest, which was emphasized as she tucked her arms under them.
“Hmm, this seems kind of tight”, Lydia complained, picking at the edges of her bra, to which a few Elven women eyed her in envy.
“… Thank god I was born… I-I mean”, Max recovered his floating soul rising over his head to plump it back firmly within himself, “Why are you wearing something like that?!”
“Oh this”, Lydia shrugged, “I don’t have any Royal Road underwear items”.
“…TOO MUCH INFO!!”
“Wow… I cannot imagine you as being Gerhard’s grandchild. Too easily ruffled”.
“Wait…”, Max had a weird premonition, “Does this mean that…”
Before he could finish his sentence, Mayumi strode out… and struck Max speechless. Contrary to what he was imagining, she was wearing a white fur sarong wrapped around her petite chest that reached just above her knees, her white shoulders bared which contrasted the red flower patterns that were stained unto the cloth. There was a notable increase in his heart rate.
“Well what do you think?”, Mayumi spun around, “Does it suit me?”
“…”
“Heeellooo”, she flicked his nose with a fingertip in annoyance, “Virgin-kuuuun?”
“…Beautiful”, he uttered subconsciously, “Really beautiful…”
“…H-hmph!!”, Mayumi turned away from him, “That doesn’t make me happy to hear it from a gopher. Baaaaka !”.
“Well you asked for my-..”, he was replying when Max noticed something strange. The market had gone quiet.
The party became alert instantly, however, it was too late. Two scores of Elven archers appeared from the rooftops, with bows drawn and ready to fire, while on the ground level a large warband of Elves with hands resting on slung ornate hand axes and the pommels of sheathed long knives, skilfully surrounded them in total silence, like a pack of wolves. Mayumi's weapons were left in the booth… Which was now behind the wall of warriors ,however, Lydia had already meekly raised her hands in surrender. Nevertheless, Mayumi didn't looked like she was going anywhere without a fight, raising her hands instinctively in the fighting forms of unarmed combat, similar to Aikido. But to her surprise, Max stood in front of her, pickaxe in hand, although his body visibly shook in fright at the odds arrayed against them.
But his hands were steady… Like those of a warrior.
Mayumi smiled behind his back, for a moment touched… Before she grabbed the back of his shirt and flung him carelessly into the fruit stand behind her, his yelp of surprise changing into a groan of pain on impact.
"No… You shouldn't worry, anata ~", Mayumi smiled sweetly, "I will protect you instead".
"Errr", Lydia scratched the side of her temple, "I think you kind of almost instant killed him…"
One of the tall Elven warriors broke ranks to stand before them, dressed in rich wolf furs and an intricate gold torc around his neck, clearly a war leader of some sort, Lydia analysed… Due to all the potential loot that could be gained, if he was to be slain… This girl really should have chosen a character class that suited her personality… Like 'Mugger,' for example.
"I trust you have enjoyed your tour of our village?" He spoke politely.
"L-look", Lydia spoke hurriedly, "We were really intending to pay for these clothes, you know. I wasn't EVEN contemplating sneaking a few bits and pieces here in my bag…"
"I… Er… What?", the Elf replied confused.
Mayumi and Max, who managed to shift himself in an upright position from under a pile of crushed fruit, a pulped orange leaking juice down his face from atop his head, both looked at Lydia, like she was some sort of criminal.
"Eh?" Lydia asked in astonishment, "We are not being arrested for theft?"
"Well… No", The Elf looked baffled, "I was just told to escort you to the Elven Council"
"Ohhhh…", Lydia laughed in relief, "Hahaha, you should say so in the first place"
"But, about those items you mentioned…"
"Hmm?" She looked innocently back at him, "I have no idea what you are talking about"
"… Just come with us", he sighed.
When Mayumi and Lydia came out of the booths after changing back to their normal attire, the short samurai went up to Max, who was gingerly picking off bits of fruits from his clothing, standing in front of him… And looked silently at him.
Max, noticing the oddness of her behaviour, said, "W-what is it?"
"…" Not saying a word, she removed the pulped orange from his head, coming so close that Max could smell her flowery scent flooding and overpowering his overexcited senses, before she whispered in his ear, "You… Are really hopeless".
"Eh?" Was all he said, before he felt a kiss on his cheek. Somehow, it felt different from all the other times she had done it… Nah, must be his imagination, as she spun away to skip along beside Lydia, acting totally indifferent.
'Yeah', Max rubbing his cheek faintly, 'Definitely my imagination'.
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The party was reunited again, Gerhard, Masumi and William, all escorted by a large amount of warriors, Masumi disgruntled and annoyed that their 'date' was interrupted by pointless politics but who, upon seeing her twin, smiled and joining hand in hand, began telling each other their day. Even under such inauspicious circumstances, the mood was generally light hearted, if one was to ignore the fact that they were surrounded by over a hundred armed warriors that brought them to a squat unassuming white building. And to everyone’s astonishment as they entered, it turned out that this barely one storey tall modest structure was the center of government for the Shadow Clan, where the Elders stood gathered to greet them.
"So", Gerhard initiated politely, noting the tension in the air, "to what do we owe the pleasure of being escorted by armed guards on such a lovely day?”
"I…", Mist looked to her feet guiltily before raising her head to face him, "I am sorry, Sainür , it is my fault that-…"
"Silence, daughter", one of the Elder's spoke up, "I am Taisei, which in your tongue would mean ‘Great Sage’. However, it would be unwise of me to not inform you right now, that you shouldn’t be here”
“… meaning?”, Max asked before his grandfather could.
“That unless my daughter is proven right”, Taisei continued gravely, “we may need to slay all of you. My apologies for that”
“… none takEN! YOU THINK WE WOULD SAY THAT?!”, Max voice rose, before Gerhard swatted him in the back of the head.
“Please, forgive my grandson”, Gerhard apologized, “the young tend to get over excited over minor matters”.
“Y-you… look a bit young to have a grandson”, Taisei rubbed the bridge of his nose in confusion, “Well then again, all you humans look the same to me”.
“Haha”, Gerhard laughed it off, “I married quite young”.
There was a collective, “Oi, oi, I think that is beside the point here”, Mayumi and Lydia exclaimed out loud, startling each other at their exact response… While Masumi was playing with William all this time, not even paying attention to the seriousness of the atmosphere.
“I see…”, Taisei nodded in understanding, “I will need to revise my knowledge of human physiology then…”
“N-no”, Max tried to correct him, “I really think your knowledge is fine”
“Human”, Tasei tsked, “We Elves are also a scientific race, and right now before my eyes I have discovered that an Amin can be aged 20-30 and have grandchildren. Clearly, your intellect can’t possibly compare to our centuries of wisdom and applied science”
“…Yup”, Max grinned evilly, “This is my GRANDfather all right”, placing an arm across the shoulders of Gerhard, “ONLY 20 years old. We humans mature quite fast, yeah Opi ?”
“Well, of course”, Gerhard innocently answered, using the knowledge he had gained from Tolkien’s books, “In comparison to the Elves, we are a very prolific species and that is due to our ability to mature rapidly into adulthood”.
“Ah, I see…”, Taisei noting this down in a tome that he had taken out from under his robe.
“Ahem”, interrupted one of the Elders, “I think we have gotten off track”.
“Oh? Oooooh”, Taisei finally remembered what he was supposed to do, “Well, my daughter here has made some… claims regarding what she saw you doing in one of our sacred sites"
"… And I am assuming that somehow this has been brought into discontent by your council?" Gerhard intuited.
"… my daughter was right. You are sharp for an Amin ".
Gerhard just shrugged, "Former detective with the Vienna Police Force. If I can't join the few clues before me, then how would I catch criminals?"
"Excellent, well", Taisei coughed into his hand, "this will speed things right along", eyeing his daughter in particular, "It has been a long time since anyone was able to commune with our Lady. And when I mean long, we are talking about a few centuries, give or take a decade or two"
"What does this have to do with-..", Max interrupted, however, Gerhard lifted a hand to silence him.
"It means…" Gerhard looking at Taisei steadily, "That for a human to speak to an ELF goddess before any of her own creation… Has ruffled some religious feathers", raising an eyebrow in question, "hasn't it, Taisei?"
"… If you weren't human, I would offer you an apprenticeship as one of the scholars amongst the Clan", which caused a squawk of protest from the other elders, "I said IF", Taisei continued in annoyance, "By the World Tree, you would think with superior Elven hearing, there would be less misunderstandings!"
"I take it there is some way to prevent us all from being executed", Gerhard gently nudged Taisei back on topic.
"Oh? Ah yes", Taisei nodded, "There is one way"
"And that is…?"
Taisei announced solemnly, "To unveil and prove that your powers are from Selvaria herself… In the Shadow Clan's rite of initiation into adulthood", the Elf smiled grimly, "where you must not only survived, but be judged by my entire Clan".
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"This", Max grumbled, "is unfair".
Their party bar Gerhard, was sitting high up in the canopies of the trees, vast platforms hanging from the branches and connected to one another by elegant bridges, allowing a bird's eye view of the entire field below them. There was a constant influx of Elves unto these structures, as word had gone around the village of what was transpiring, those patrols that are close by returning early while those further out will no doubt be unable to attend. However, there was no hiding the undercurrent of excitement as all gathered at the crystal wooded railings, leaning down to look at the lone human standing near the entryway of the Clan's proving grounds.
"Well", Lydia shrugged, "Gerhard always loves walking into trouble. A simple, 'No, I am sorry, I don’t like following random strangers who appear out of the woods', would have saved us a lot of headaches", she smacked her forehead tiredly.
Max and the twins both gazed steadily at Lydia until she finally uttered, "W-what?"
"Weren't you the one who was forced to 'return' all those goods that had mysteriously fallen in your bag?" Max pointed out.
"B-but it was an accident!", Lydia cried, "Honestly!"
"And the Elven necklace around your neck. Was that an accident too?", Mayumi rubbed the side of her forehead with her fingers, head in hand.
"T-that!", Lydia explained hurriedly, "I already told the shop owner that it was his fault for not charging me with all the other goods I bought!"
"… You only bought a cheap two copper trinket from him", Masumi stated in a monotone voice, "and almost made off with a necklace valued at five hundred gold…"
To this, Lydia just looked to the ceiling, gazing in fake wonderment at the leaves as she whistled tunelessly. The essence of innocence… She was not.
"… I am never shopping with you again", Mayumi declared in embarrassment.
"But nonetheless", Masumi bringing them back to the topic at hand, "I too agree. They are forcing Ange-… Gerhard-sama", blushing as she mentioned his name, "to fight on a battlefield without any knowledge of its peculiarities or of his own choosing".
"And anyway", Mayumi piped in, "why do we really need to prove that he is a Sainür anyway? Can't he just perform the Tree Song?"
Max shrugged his shoulders, "The test is probably to see how he utilizes the power and to determine whether he is worthy of it. Well that is my guess".
"Hmph", Mayumi complained, "Can't we just annihilate the village?", uttering genocide easily in a bored tone of voice... Can someone please complain to her parents about their poor teaching in ethics...
Max, his elbow on the railing and resting chin on the palm of his hand, gazed out and rested his eyes on the form of his grandfather who was performing some stretches, thinking for a long moment before replying, "It's because, if there is a way to avoid violence… My grandfather would set upon that path without regret of the hardship"
"Ehhh?", Mayumi exclaimed in surprise, "He sounds almost like a pacifist… But we all know that he is a ferocious fighter"
"That's, well… But when he must act… I guess, the warrior in him will always return to the fore", Max thought with a mixture of pride and uneasiness, "and now I know where he has gotten this… 'Instinct'… On a real battlefield… I feel that he has become someone different to me".
Masumi moved to stand next to Max, speaking after collecting her thoughts, "Your grandfather has not changed, Max. He has always been who he is. It's just that your view of him has changed", turning her head to the side to face him, "Your eyes have been opened, Max, because you now know more about your grandfather than you did before. Does knowing this make you love him less?"
"… No… Whatever he was or did… He is still my Opi ".
"See", Masumi showed a rare brilliant smile, so unlike her usual deadpan expressions… Well, in front of Max anyway, "You have always known the answer"
"… Thanks, Masumi. I think this is the first time you spoke this much to me", he grinned, "I feel much better now."
"It's no problem, Max", Masumi replied, "It's my duty to know and comfort my future grandson after all"
"… I take back what I said… I think it will be torture to have a fourteen year old grandmother…"
"Oh? But I am seventeen though. Me and Mayumi just choose a younger avatar"
"THAT DOESN’T MAKE IT ANY BETTER YOU KNOW?!" Max yelled in exasperation.
"Ooooh!", William called out excitedly, "Angel is waving at us!"
"Gosh, you are so uncute", Mayumi tutted at Max while standing behind William, "you should act more like William here"
"Like twelve?" He retorted.
"Didn't someone say that he was that age a few hours ago?" She prodded his chest painfully.
"I, errrr… Oh look! He is waving at us!" trying to forcefully change the subject.
And so Gerhard was, after having been told that he will need to begin within the next five minutes, had already prepared himself as much as possible… Which is not considerable due to the lack of information he was given. However, Gerhard just grinned to himself, reminded of all the times he was ordered to do insane things in the army with even less information at hand, and with no other choice but to succeed… As failure would have ended in death.
At a nod from one of his ‘caretakers’, Gerhard made sure his sword was secured in his sheathe before looking up to gaze determinedly ahead… And began walking into the maze.
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Ending Song: Kore wa Koi
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