Getting all comfy, I sat on my bed. Back against the wall, pillow behind my head - even while being deprived of actual body sensations I could have nearly let out a sigh of relief. The sun slowly setting outside behind a horizon, the cold wind blowing stronger and stronger, hitting the window’s shutters. It all wrapped around me, comforting in its own way.

Blanket, book… Only a warm drink was lacking to make this moment magical, though, taking into consideration that I was unable to ingest any foods and liquids, made me ‘forgive’ this little imperfection.

The little kid in me - the one that loved hero stories - was jumping in anticipation, as I opened the ‘Iron Maiden Breaker’ and my eyes fell on the first sentence. My “heart” nearly skipped a beat, my “lungs” stopped drawing breath, the adrenaline nearly drove me insane in anticipation of reading a new, highly rated novel…

…

…….

…………

The world turned grey.

“How is my favourite undead doing!?” The Beast in Black materialized next to me “... I told you I would be back in four to five days, no!? A deal is a deal after all, and here I am to…”

He noticed the book I was holding.

“Ooooh! Wonderful novel, if you asked me - fun fact for today, will give you this piece of information for free, but the writer is actually one of my followers! She asked for a tiny bit of inspiration and so I recounted some old tales of… that’s irrelevant. But, I encourage you to read it! The ending is really mind BLOWING… ay get it? The-he-h… Sorry for that, lame joke.”

Without paying any attention to the courtesy that the guest should have shown to his host, he casually grabbed one of the chairs in the room, and sat on it, putting his legs on the desk.

“...” he looked at me, gaze full of anticipation “...Soooo?” “What?” “Questions. Told you. I give you three questions to ask me. Come on, you have a chance to look behind the curtain of this play at the theatres. You can learn some of the rules. Come on, you can ask me anything! Well, nearly anything. Some plot relevant details are naturally kept tight-lipped even amongst us gods.”

All of his actions were so… so disrespectful, they nearly made my “blood” boil. Coming in, whenever he pleases, giving rewards in any form and way he pleases, as if implying I am his servant, and he is a good and generous master, maybe even expecting gratitude from me!

And I, I am not a servant… not anymore.

“Including asking you to leave?”

I wanted to annoy him, to make him show his true colors, to assure me, that despite his sweet words and deals, he is no different to other gods, turning mortals into scapegoats to proceed with their plans. And yet, much to my surprise, he burst into laughter. Not an evil one though, a genuinely happy teary eyed one.

“Good one. Now, don’t be such a bitch when someone tries to help you, or else…” he raised his fingers, as if threatening me. “Or else?” I decided to continue, to see his worst. In the end, he said it himself - he had plans about me, knowing this, I had an upper hand in our little negotiations. “... I will spoil the ending of this book!”

I… was left speechless.

“Pardon me?” and dumbfounded as well. “Not only this one! EACH AND EVERY ONE! I'll be watching you, waiting for the time you pick up ANY book, and once you open the cover, flip to the very first page, I will be there! TO RUIN IT FOR YOU!... Don’t try me, bitch, I can be reaaally mean. One of my followers called my spoiler bluff once, so I ruined this pirate tale he had been reading for decades muahahaha!”

…

…….

…………….

He might be a god. But, apparently, he was still an idiot as well.

I decided to close the book and put it away, twisting on the bed and facing him directly.

“Three questions?” I asked, with a bit more of an obedient tone, earning myself a nod from him. “Three questions, though, to some I will not answer. For example, if you would ask me about the plans of other gods - I don’t know them, well, not fully, can only guess...” “The Game. What is it?” I decided to disturb him in the middle of his speech. “And here I hoped you would ask less predictable questions. Yes, you mortals love asking about this, whenever you hear that you are a part of that. It's a terrible thing, Aster. Answers to this question will provide you nothing. You cannot change it, you are unable to. It only shows your fear - your panic from being in place or situation that you know nothing about. Don’t let the fear guide you, Asterouse. It always ends poorly.”

He took a deep breath, stretched, and leaned back on the chair… a bit too far, making the chair lose its balance and fall behind.

And then I was witness to one of the gods banging his head on the floor, cursing nastly.

“Well, anyway… What is the world to you?” he asked me. “What kind of question is that? The world is the world. It’s everything. The place we live in, and everything that is in it, for us to use. The countries, the rivers, the mountain and forests, the oceans… As one of the philosophers said - sky's the limit.”

He smiled in a really nasty way.

“The thing is, it is not, Aster.” he snapped finger, and several toys and games appeared in the room “... This is you…” he said picking out a teddy bear “... and this is a god.”

He said, and a small ‘child’ materialized, semi transparent, like a ghost, in no time, he gave teddy to the kid, which started to play with it. Roughly, pulling, throwing and tearing it all over the place.

“You see, to you, the world is this room. You never left this place, this is where the god plays with you. He is big, you are small. He can pluck your eyes out…” in this moment a kid ripped buttons sewed to the teddy’s head “.. or tear your leg…” the kid also did that. “You see, this whole room belongs to the kid. And it is his property. He can do WHATEVER he wants to you, for he has power, and you do not.” “So that’s what we are? Just toys? No, pawns?”

He got up and pointed at me

“PRECISELY!... But, only thanks to me. You are pawns out of my idea. And, you don’t even have idea how grateful you should be to me for this.”

Is he… crazy?

“You see, I MADE THE GAME. I designed it! This world is not unique, Aster! It is like this room. There are many rooms in the house, and there are many houses in the city, in the country and the “world”! There are just as many gods, and millions, if not billions more toys! To abuse! To use! To fight boredom! Because, gods want to achieve something. And they are experimenting with their toys! In a cruel, and inhuman way! You were NOTHING… instead, I made this.”

He snapped his fingers, both toys and kid vanished, instead, a chess board appeared in the middle of the room.

“Tell me - what can humans do to the pawn?”

The god asked, raising up a small wooden piece.

“Is he unable to destroy it?” he asked, snapping the figure in his hand “... is he unable to burn it? To take the board and break it on his knee? Then, why isn’t he doing that? Aster, why? BECAUSE THIS IS NOT THE PURPOSE OF THE GAME! I gave the gods a sense of rivalry! I turned mortals, from teddies that they could break and tear and burn and massacre, into sacred pieces! I ELEVATED you, from nothing, to important pieces meant to be used against one another! This is The Game, Aster! I put a bunch of gods into the same room and told them that they have to win against one another! Together we made a set of rules! Like - you cannot lie. You cannot directly interfere, unless certain conditions are met. You can’t send angels, devils, leviathan nor plagues! You can’t freely move mountains! When you make a decision, perform an action, you cannot undo it! Thanks to me, you, everyone here, became… Important. As much as one could be at least.”

He sat down, again, with a smirk of superiority and pride.

“... you have no idea how life of some mortals looked in certain worlds, under certain gods. Some, literally eradicated nations on a whim, some, completely gave up on them, saying that mortals would be fine on their own, and not interfering at all, letting mortals to drive themself to self-extinction. Some rueful ones designed entire worlds to torture a single person, just because. Instead, here I came, making those gods who abandoned their purpose to start ‘working’ again. I made the gods who were breaking their worlds apart to halt, and act via measured means and actions!” “... which led to my death?” I asked, full of bitterness.

This killed his excitement. The light of passion in his eyes died, as he became serious again.

“Partly? Yes. The Game is not perfect. Not by any means. It is not measurably better from what was before it, but…” he sighed “... All of you are still lab rats, experimenting, based on your lives, the ‘patches’ to the game are meant to appear with time, but, a bit before the current game ends. Which means you will not live to see the improvements.”

He said getting up again, and starting to walk over the room.

“Do you know why I picked you? HOW - I pick my followers?” he asked, not even looking in my direction. “How would I know. According to the goddesses, they baited you into picking me, granting me a holy name so you would try to convert me, instead of a real champion that they hid from your eyes.” “Yes and no, that is indeed one way - to ‘corrupt’, let call it that - their favourites. But, when it turned out you were not the exact “champion” I expected, I could have just thrown you out, and focused my gaze on someone else. But instead, I invested in your growth.” he stopped for a moment, gathering his own thoughts “... You see, I like outcasts. Irregularities. Or even - bullied people. Those who didn’t break. Those who are cursing their fate. Those who say - ‘If I was only strong enough, I would show them!’, or ‘If I only had a second chance, I would do it!’. Those are my people. Not geniuses. Not artists. Not perfect kids pumped with steroids of divine blessings. Because they are faulty. When everything that you were doing in your life was a pure success, and you encountered your first failure, first difficulty… you have no idea how often they break, how often they are left helpless. Unprepared that things didn’t work out just because they tried to resolve it.”

He would look at me one more time.

“No. What I seek is no skill, but determination. Skills can be learned, but mentality, passion, pure boldness! That’s something that you can’t be taught. You, twice slain, thrice reborn - this is motivation I seek, and that’s what I wish to see! The man that even when left broken and dying, would not give up, the man, that even then would spit on their enemies!... You have this quality, Aster. You can lie to yourself that you are doing it for someone else. Deep inside, I know, that you were envious. Of status. Of power, that you were cursing yourself for not being strong, smart or wealthy enough. It is a beauty, Aster. This is wonderful. To never be sated, it means always improving, yearning for more.” “I don’t think I agree… It makes me sound like a villain.” “Villany never knows itself. You think that inquisitors burning heathens think they are evil? You think that the father of starving kids, stealing to put food on the table, thinks he is doing wrong? What is a crime? What is a virtue?! NOTHING! Point of view depends on where you’re sitting! Heroes of one nation are villains of the other! Stop thinking about nonsense, Aster! There is no good or bad in this world! Only what benefits or harms you!”

Even, if I can understand some of your motives… If every desperate person could get his guidance, the whole world’s order would fall! He… was a madman. Focused, dedicated. A lunatic, not caring about any community or order. Zariel - you are not a God of Change! You are a God of Anarchy and Chaos! Whatever plans you have, I hope they will fail!

“That should conclude my answers to the first question. You still have two. Please, make them interesting or useful!” he ran up to me, sliding on his knees, he clasped his hands together, as if begging me. “... Liz’. Where and how is she?” “Me damn it!...” he cursed, jumping back up to his feet “... What did I just ask you?! What will asking that change?!” he whined like a little kid “...Okay,I will allow you to ask your second question again!” “I already did.”

Groaning, he massaged his face, stretching it multiple times more than anyone should ever be able to do before letting it go. The skin springing back into place with a strange slapping sound.

“You are an utter moron, unable to truly seize opportunity given to you on a silver platter! Fine! You are the one wasting divine attention! Your little birdie is in Western Londern, in a small mountain mansion of the Diederik family, surrounded by an army of maids, access to a small library and being served with every delicacy of the world… which she doesn’t eat. She barely eats at all actually. She is pale, exhausted, and wastes days either crying, or just doing nothing, like a phantom of a human being. She is still not over your ‘death’. Unlike for you, the empty Oath partly remained in her body, hollow, empty, draining. She will get better, with time, but for now, for over a month, she hasn't been in a private library even once. She doesn’t ever leave her room. There, your precious information. You have one more to ask.”

This… squeezed my “heart”. Painfully. With sorrow. Poor, poor Liz’. My love. My life! Why did they seperate us! Why did they make us suffer?! For the sake of their own, selfish desires! This is not how nobles should act! They were meant to be our protectors! Guide us to prosperity! Not murders! Not thieves! These nobles, these gods, this GAME!

Gritting my teeth, I swallowed insults.

There was no reason to yell, not here, when no one was listening. No one, but a god who would try to use it against me, to motivate me into carrying on his evil deeds.

“Third question I am waiting! Just because I froze time, doesn’t mean I have time to spare. Game rules, I can only spend a fixed amount of time between tik and tok. That’s why I gave you five days to come up with questions before this, so we wouldn't waste time here, on pointless chatter.Chatter like your last two questions have been!” he said with a scolding tone.

And yet, my head was empty. Having nothing else to ask, I started to quickly look for anything that raised my attention last time.

“Say - about this whole system…” Zariel perked up, his eyes shining “... It says my strength is ninety one, I started with thirty or so, but I don’t feel like being… thrice as strong?” “Oh, that's because the improvement is not linear. It’s more like…” he was looking for words “...Hmm. Oh, I see. Let’s say that you improved your strength by ten points. Raising them from ten to twenty is far more impactful than ninety to hundred. Yes, obviously, the man with a hundred is unmeasurably stronger than the one with ten, but, the curve keeps on flattening! Ten is a basic minimum that a human adult should have, anything less than that is either a person that is chronically sick, wounded, and so on. While hundred or so is a ‘normal peak’ - the strongmen that you can see occasionally in travelling circuses that bend iron bars with their bare hands. Of course, even normal humans can raise their attributes above one hundred, especially adventurers, that unconsciously ‘inhale’ magical essence from the dungeons… But the idea of the system is letting humans keep on reaching new and new peaks, without actually reaching it. Ot - call it a safety measure, we don’t want some error to appear in the system, that would let a human to punch a hole in the mountain lets say. Look at your class system! Each time you are allowed to pick from three core specializations, each time increasing the number of points that you receive. If you keep on choosing warrior class, you will be consistently given a huge boost to your strength and endurance, mediocre dexterity stats, and small, if any, to your intelligence. If you would add, for example, mage to your next class, your physical strength would remain on the same level, but your intelligence and wisdom would start being passively increased. If you would ask me - you made some mistakes early on, you should have created one basic secondary side specialization, to ensure you would have at least mediocre progression of another set of stats, specialization on one domain should be something you could choose later. Because of this, you became so specialized on one branch, that someone more diverse could easily find a hole in your defense and use it against you. For example, if you fought against someone specializing in both magic and dexterity, you will have one hell of a fight… Phew. This!”

… that was way more than I asked about. He really wanted to tell this to me, right? Was he nagging so much, because I didn’t let him ‘scold me’ for the mistake in my progression?

“So… You want me to choose another specialization soon?” “Eh!? What!? No! Me? Wanting things from players? Never! You play like you want to! It’s meant to be fun for you, not me! What Game Master would I be if I tried influencing people how to play!?” His face contorted into a dozen different shapes before returning to “normal”.

He did. He really, really, did want me to choose something else. Like a kid seeing someone playing a game they had mastered, like a master smith wanting to guide his apprentice’s hand themself. An extremely infantile smith, wanting to brag about his technique.

A god. A lunatic. An anarchist. A spoiled brat desperately wanting to be heard out and admired. What a dangerous combination!

“Aaaaanywayy! I said what I wanted! And our time is almost up! So, I will show myself out. Enjoy your lecture!...” a hole in reality appeared behind him, and he put his leg on the other side, halfway in the rift, he just turned his head to me one last time, pointing on the book “... Also, Eleonora is a cunt!” he said, vanishing.

Slowly, the world recovered its colors.

…

……

………

That was awkward.

But, indeed it left me with lots of things to think about.

The worlds. The gods.

.

…

And the book which I could finally read. It was just as he said. I can do nothing about The Game between gods, I can’t do anything with Liz’ on the other side of the kingdom. Not right now.

All I could focus on was my training with Natasha tomorrow. But, that was tomorrow. I had an evening and night. Just for myself and my book.

Once again, I sat on the bed. Rested my back on the wall, put a pillow behind my head, grabbed the blanket and covered myself, slowly “breathing” in and out, trying to calm down, clean my mind, and hype myself back into a mood to read.

Five or so minutes later, it happened. It hit me like a cart. I opened the book, flipped to the first page. And my sight landed on the...

First sentence.

First word.

I was about to start reading…

… When someone knocked on my door.

OH FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE!!!

“ALABASTEEEER! WE ARE GOING TO THE INN TO DRINK! AND YOU ARE COMING WITH US!” I heard the cheerful yell of Agnes.

No. Aster. Stay quiet. Pretend you are not in the room. They will leave eventually.

“Aaa-laaa-baaa-steeer!” some more knocking “...I am both respecting your privacy by knocking, but asserting my authority as a senior in rank by coming in anyway!”

BOOM.

She rammed something heavy on the door, which shook the doorframe.

“M-maybe he is not here?” someone else shyly added. “THEN WE WILL ENTER AND WAIT FOR HIM THERE!”

BOOM!

No, she is just joking, there is no way that…

BOOM!!!

The door actually got bent in the middle, where whatever she was using hit the door.

Groaning and moaning in irritation, I yelled.

“ONE MOMENT! Let me dress!”

I put the book on the nightstand, gently caressed the cover, whispering to it:

“... Wait for me, I will be back, I promise.”

Before I started dressing up, annoyed that my little date with three hundred pages of a renowned story was once again delayed. But, the book is not going anywhere. And unlike the living, I had all the time in the world.