Ridiculous. It would be comedic, if it wasn’t so tragic. I really wanted to laugh through the tears. I was so close! I had him in my very hands! I was so close! My plan was perfect, and even though I executed it correctly…

… If Eric would only sit back! Why did he have to act now?! When other kids were beating him, when people would complain of how stupid and naive he was or when he failed the simplest task, why wouldn’t he act then!? Why did he raise his hand against the only person that ever cared about him!? WHY!?

Fuck! FUCK! What kind of unfunny joke is that?

I was lying in a shallow ditch that they dug in a few moments as a makeshift grave. They didn’t do that to respect my body - no. That was part of ritual - giving back dead to the earth so they wouldn’t rise again.

And now, with melted skin and body, with bones visible in dozen places I was lying, without the ability to move.

They got me. I was given a chance, and I lost. I have failed everyone. I have failed villagers - I didn’t protect them from this noble beast. I failed Liz. Even Zariel who gave me this second chance…

And now, all I could do was to wait for a Mistwalker to come for me again.

Where would I go this time? Halls of light were forever shut before me. And the Wanderer said that the afterlife is a feature “he didn’t spend much time working on”. Is nothingness everything that awaits me?

Maybe… that’s the best solution.

I spent the entire night like this. As the darkness shrouded the forest some nocturnal scavengers came out from their dens to feast on my remains. A fitting fate for such a failure as myself.

The dawn came, yet I still remained, a consciousness in an immovable object. I did scan my status a few times, for the sole purpose of passing time. My vitality had hit 0 a long time ago.

Maybe… Maybe I should just pray? Not for the sake of asking for anything, but just to let the Fate Breaker know that I won’t be able to carry on our deal… He at least deserves to know.

… But, how do you pray to him? He didn’t teach me any of his prayers, actually, he even mentioned that he barely cares about people praying to him… so, maybe he won’t get mad by some random form.

Mentally, I cleared my throat before starting.

I pray to you, Forger of Stars, confessing my sins against you.

I failed to meet my end of bargain, wasting the chance you gave me.

I was naive and foolish. And… I only wish you to know that I regret not meeting your expectations…

A prayer to [Zariel, The Fate Breaker] detected.

Starting a voice call

In my mind, a weird, calm, repetitive song started playing. After about thirty seconds of it, another text message appeared.

We are sorry, all our priests are currently busy, please stay put or try again later. You are now … fourteenth… in queue.

That was… something new, that’s for sure. Would that mean that up until now all of us prayed wrongly, or… no, it’s more likely Zariel’s improvement to whatever that was supposed to be.

The annoying music resumed, without the ability to move and thus nothing else to do - being just fated to suffer this melody which was driving me into madness and beyond I did my best trying to focused. With strong resolve to not give up, I mentally clenched my teeth and carried on.

Over three hours of this agony later, and several notification informing how far in queue I was, the final announcement appeared:

Thank you for staying with us, you are now … first… in queue, our priest will contact with you sho…

The text vanished, being replaced by a huge panel in which someone’s picture appeared. It was a woman, some kind of beastmen of faeryfolk which I have never seen before. She was somewhat close to the lizard-folk living on the swamps, but she was far less feral, human-ish even. Partly covered in scales and scars with talness and muscles that could rival with most of the knights. She opened her mouth and yelled:

“THE FUCK DO YOU WANT?”

Her eyes were sparkling with anger at the edge of madness.

“I- Am sorry to bother you…” somehow my voice could be heard, though my lips (or pieces of burned flesh, into which my lips turned to) remained sealed “YOU BETTER FUCKING BE! I have better things to do than to hear out all of your yappers all the time! Bring me this, grant me this, make a pact, send a hot girl my direction… I didn’t sign for this… I mean, I did, but not knowing what I get myself into…” she raised her gaze “...not that you care. All of you are interested only in getting your desires granted.” “Actually, I already was granted one pact, but I happened to recently die, so I called to inform Zariel that I won’t be able to fulfill my side of a deal…” “Oh, don’t worry about it, in case of death of the pacted, one’s deal is losing its powers… well, most of them..” “Y-yeah, I called just to apologise and… um… pass some time till the netherworld would take me… so I don’t mind listening to your story.”

She gave me a puzzled look.

“Are you sure?” “I have all the time in the world. Heck, at least this way I can be useful to his priestess.” “... I was meant to be something more than just a priestess, you know? Zariel wasn’t always like that...” “A madman obsessed with pacts?” I asked. “A god. He was a mortal, like you and me…” SAY WHAAAT?! “...but, he stopped the end of the world. People started worshiping him as a hero that died for the sake of the entire world and… one thing led to another… by consuming the power of a creature that was supposed to swallow the Sun and becoming a worshiped idol, he ascended to godhood. He was my mate, you know? I kinda murmured his death, so when he came down from the heavens saying that he became divine and needed someone to be a head priest, I didn’t think much and just hopped in.” “He… used his love?” “Nnnnot exactly used, no… Thanks to me taking this role we can still spend much time together… I am just not fit to be some kind of secretary, y’know? I am more the warrior type…” yeah, I could say this much “... actually, you are the first person that ever listened to my rants… tell you what, I will try talking with Zari and get you some nice bonus to your deal…” “I am dead…” I allowed myself to remind her. “Oh, yes, haha, sorry, forgot about that already…”

Something clicked on her side, probably a door, as someone entered the room in which the weird priestess resided.

“Oh, honey, we were just talking about you!” she said in a much and tone. “I bet you did. You just can’t stop admiring me, can’t you?” that was definitely Zariel’s voice. “Pffth! You wish! How was your day?” “Crazy. I visited the goddesses of the other universe, these mad whores barged into my pact, kinda ruining my new champion… welp, whatever. I will make a man out of him yet, you will see! After that I killed some angels, hit a few more deals, collected payments from a bastard that refused to pay… idiot, should have better read the terms on his deal… I nailed him to a rock… but that only got me into a good mood… now, all I wish to nail is you…” “We are still on vision! You moron!” “Good. They can watch!” “THEY OBVIOUSLY CAN’T!” She grabbed a heavy mug and threw it in the god’s direction, guessing by the sound, she landed a perfect headshot “... perverted idiot…” she added at the end. “Whatever, the fuck did that person want? Let’s end him quickly so I can start doing you!”

Another projectile has been launched at the god, and once again, the sound betrayed that it landed.

“Oh, he just wanted to report that he died and won’t be able to carry on with his bargain.” “And another one gone, and another one gone, and another one bites the dust… just my fucking luck. Well, whatever, thank him for his services. As long as it’s not that one fucked up kid I don’t really mind… what’s his name?” “Oh, I didn’t yet ask, kid, what’s your name.” “Aster…” I responded obediently “He says his name is Aster.” “Oh, I see, Aster…” there was a short pause on the other side “...WACHAMEANHESNAMEISASTER!?”

Zariel’s face appeared on the screen… quite literally. He completely plastered his cheek to the vizier covering the priestess behind him.

“Um, yes, that’s me… Hi?” “I LEFT YOU FOR ONE FUCKING DAY! ONE DAY! THAT MUST BE THE NEW RECORD! A CHAMPION DYING AFTER ONE FUCKING DAY! I won’t be able to face Heira or mama Aiele… Oh, the shame. The dishonor!... by the stars! What even happened to you!? You look as if a behemoth ate you, shat you out, ate you again, chewed you, and spat out! Gis, my love - look at this! Look how they massacred my boy!”

For a moment he went off the vizier to make some space and once again show the red headed priest my condition… which was quite embarrassing.

“My love, forgive me, our date will need to wait an hour more… Don’t move from there, Aster I will come to you in a jiffy!”

And he ran out toward the direction of the door he came previously through.

“Zari, love, that’s the portal leading to our world…” The Woman called Gis noticed. “So… the other one?” A question could be heard. “Yeah, the other one.”

I could once again see as the Star Forger ran behind his priest towards a different side of the room, before the sound of a door being opened and later closed could be heard.

“So, um, Aster, I'm hanging up. Zari will be there in a few minutes, he needs to squeeze between universes, be patient… Well, I am going, have a nice day.” “Have a nice day too, I am sorry for putting your date on hold.” “Worry not, I will make Zari reward me this inconvenience!”

She ended the conversation by waving her hand.

In the end, she wasn’t as bad as the beginning of our conversation implied that she would be. Probably just had just a long day… Nice lass indeed…

Reality close to me shifted as dark mist started taking the form of a human, soon, the Fate Breaker was sitting on the fallen tree next to my broken body.

He stood like that in silence for few moments, before eventually inhaling loudly and saying only one word:

“Boy.” That one word was filled with so much disappointment and tiredness, that it hurt more than the entire tyrade. “Yeah, I am… sorry… I guess?” “How the fuck did you manage to get yourself killed so quickly, wait, don’t say anything, I can check that for myself…”

For a moment, his eyes became completely black and the expression that was painted on his face implied that his mind isn’t exactly here, with me, at that very moment. After less than a minute, his eyes went back to normal.

“O-ho! Good ol’ backstabbing. Classic. Well, not quite stab in the back, but saying that you were head-rocked just doesn’t have this charm… Which doesn’t change the fact that you fucked up.” “I just… don’t understand why Eric did this to me…” “Friend or not, you were an undead. How would you react seeing the animated body of your friend attacking some stranger?... But, it's a bit different when you learn that spoken stranger killed your friend… yeah, he actually helped him to kill you for the second time. That was a cold, mate.” “I think… I understand his motives… but I can’t forgive him. I just can’t. It hurts more than being just stabbed.” “Betrayal never comes from your enemies…” Zariel sounded as a person that knew that from personal experience. So… what now? Do I wait for Mistwalker, or…” “Nah, she won’t come, she doesn’t have anywhere to put you…” “What?” “What-what? I told you that I don’t have an afterlife quite yet! Unless you don’t want to spend gods-only-know how long in pitch black darkness, shut the fuck up, will you?” “So… I will lie like this?” “Only for a decade or two, depends how quickly I will get that matter organized.”

He said that with a smile on his face.

“Oh, twenty years. Over six thousands days, I won’t even notice when the time would pass. Maybe I will become a friend with a rat that bite my finger off…” “See? That’s the right attitude! Or… I could try using a bit of a different solution… say, don’t you want to try again?”

If I had a heart, it would have just skipped a beat.

“Can you really do that?” “I have no idea, well, not without breaking the Game’s rules… Or with a little help from someone that owes me.”

The hope that just sparked in my soul died right away. No matter with who he made a deal with, there was no way he was powerful enough to interfere into conflict between gods. Unless it was another goddess, that is.

“Even if you would succeed, what would you demand from me in return? There isn’t much I can give you taking into consideration you already own my soul…” “If you don’t have anything else to lose, do you really care?” “... I don’t.” I answered after a moment or two. “Exactly.”

And then, he snapped his fingers.

The sun exploded, sending down a ray of powerful light which hit the clearing. If I still had my eyes, I would surely be blinded.

On the burned by the ray of light ground a beautiful woman clothed in elegant white robe made of silk, with thin golden diadem on her head appeared. Behind her, two angels in golden armors were standing proudly.

“I am not a dog to be summoned like that, Wanderer…” She said in a calm, soothing tone. She didn’t have to introduce herself. Her very presence was yelling her name loud enough.

I will be damned. He actually made a deal with goddess.

“When you owe something to someone, you just do what you are told to. And don’t pretend that you or your sister wouldn’t do the same if the roles were reversed.” She didn’t respond to that, instead, she just raised her brow. “To be honest, I thought that you would wait with those , stop me from acting, making me wonder when you would decide to attack and sabotage my work… Instead, how much time has passed since we struck that deal of yours? Three hours? Four? What could be so important to force you into playing your cards so quickly.”

Zariel didn’t respond, instead, he just pointed on me with his finger.

“Oh…. Oh. My… condolences. That was supposed to be only a small prank on our side, but apparently, it caused much more harm that we intended…”

Was she speaking about me? Was I, in her eyes, nothing but a prank? Wrath boiled in my very soul, yet, the feeling of helplessness quickly put me back in my place. What could I do? As a corpse? To the goddess?

“And I wish to assure you, that it was hilarious, look how much fun my little Aster had with it! He has been just killed, everything he loved was taken away, then he was given just a little hope only to be betrayed by a person he treated like his younger brother. Hilarious, isn’t it?! Laugh with me, Lucy!” “Your fate saddens me greatly, believe me, but, if you could only see a bigger picture you would know, that your pain will bring much prosperity to this world. Michael is a wise man, with support of Elize they will make the entire region flourish, impacting thousands of lives…” “... So you were used like a sacrifice, your body has been used as another step, you served as an object to be climbed upon... aren’t you happy?” Zariel disturbed her speech. “You have a magnificent skill to spark the fire of darkest emotions in mortals' hearts, Zariel. If you would use your gifts for more noble purposes…” “Just like you? If what you are doing is just, then I will gladly become a villain.” “You yourself were leading thousands of soldiers to battle! You gave orders which sacrificed their lives to secure another castle, another valley, another trading route…” “I lied to none! They followed me because they chose so. Because of ideology? Family? Country? Money? They died fighting for something they believed in, not being manipulated and backstabbed… twice.” “Your actions will only force this world in chaos!” She yelled losing her composure. “AND WHEN THE DUST WOULD SETTLE, FROM RUIN A NEW ORDER SHALL EMERGE! Hopefully, a pure one. Without shackles of the divines bonding their ability to grow. With no more priests. No more temples. No more sacrifices!”

He turned back, facing me.

“You wanted to know what I wanted to achieve, Aster. I wanted you to light the spark of madness, of chaos, of revolution! I wanted you to hunt those who were protected by the gods, so their crime could never be left unpunished. If those, marked by the gods, were to fall, were to be seen bleeding, then, the faith into those gods would crumble. People would start working for their own salvation, instead of just praying for it! That’s the world I wish to see!” “How much evil would happen! How much suffering and pain?” “To be honest? I have no idea! Maybe we should ask Aster how much misery can a single mortal bear?”

His words were venom. They were all addressed to me. I knew that he formed these words this way on purpose. And I didn’t mind it. Quite the opposite, greedily I sucked on these words, feasting my anger, adding more fuel to the firestorm already raging in my rotten heart.

“Can we stop this charade already? You summoned me to grant you your wishes. Two of them. I am willing to comply. What about this - I will help you organize your afterlife, so Aster would have a place to rest, waiting for…” she stopped, noticing that she said too much in presence of a mortal.

What was I supposed to wait for? What is the real purpose of the afterlife? We were told that it’s the place in which we meet with our loved one, but, apparently, there is more to this.

“I can help you with your afterlife-world as well as let you choose another champion. With no time-penalty. Two wishes. Two deeds. How about that?” “Oh, but I wish to use only one of the wishes. I told you before, that I will not give up on him. Raise him up. It’s your domain, isn’t it?” “He is dead!” she hissed “... even more! Twice killed! My domain are those who are living and...” “Death, and life, are two sides of the same state. The Pale Lady is the one with whom you have a very strong connection. Ask her, and my wish will be granted…” Zariel made a short pause “... wait, you were the one that struck the deal with me because you thought that your principle would be useless to me? Didn’t you? Well, it would be a shame if I would tell you to give an order to some of the lesser goddesses in your domain, don’t you agree?” “You are truly as vicious and serpent-tongues as we thought you were…” “You just lost playing your own little game. At least accept your loss with dignity.”

The Lady of the Light approached my body, raising her hands over me.

“Don’t you find it poetic?...” The white-haired divine smiled “... You are raising up a man who at heart promised to destroy everything you ever built… Your own little Nemesis… Ah, Aster, Twice killed, Thrice raised. Stand up. Your bargain is far from being fulfilled.”