The audience was in hysterics. Coach looked like he was going to start yanking out his feathers any second.

“You… used magnets to cheat?” the king gasped.

“Yeaaah?” All of McGee’s eyes drifted to the ground.

Lyili tilted her head, her face filled with contempt for the golden haired blob. “What a disgrace.”

This was shocking and all, but I felt the need to point out something to everyone. “I’m assuming cheating isn’t allowed?”

“Of course it isn’t.” Lyili said. “Rules are essential for a fair competition, Sir Allard.”

“So… Let me get this straight…” I put my hands out in front of me like I was desperately trying to hold a ball of melting ice cream together. “You understand the value of rules in a game… but you’ve never thought to create rules outside of one?”

It was silent, but I hoped it was just the sound of all their minds being blown in unison.

“But Ryley…” Yaika said, no excitement in her voice whatsoever. “Games aren’t fun without rules.”

Okay, that was probably a negative on the mind blowing.

The king smiled, adjusting the collar of his cult robe. “A very good point, sweetie!” Was it? “There’s no need to make rules if it’s not a game!”

They… did realize that rules and laws were basically the same thing, right? As in, they went through the trouble to design rules for what you could and couldn’t do in a game that involved throwing balls around, but never considered applying that same concept to anything else. Fucking brilliant.

I opened my mouth to speak, but then stopped myself. As much as I wanted to blow them away with my logic, I would explain this later. There were more important things to worry about right now.

I glanced over at Violetta. She was shaken to her core, her eyes glassy with tears. Minzfel was standing close by. He almost put his hand on her shoulder, but then pulled it away at the last second. An advanced case of the hover hand. I wasn’t sure why, but I felt really pissed. Really pissed at McGee.

I turned back to the cheating asshole. “Magnets, huh? How do they work?” I asked.

McGee shrugged a tentacle on each side of his body. “Dude… I’m not, like, a magnet expert or something…”

I sighed. “I’m asking how you used them to cheat.”

“Oh, why didn’t you, like, say sooo?” I did. “The balls we use are totally made of metaaal, so if you throw the baaall the right way, they’ll stop where you want them tooo?” I guess that made sense.

“And so you’re saying that because you were burying these magnets, you couldn’t have killed Prowteg?”

“That’s right, man.”

I waited a second to see if he would elaborate. Apparently he wasn’t going to. “You… do realize that makes no sense, right? Just because you were doing something else illegal doesn’t mean you couldn’t have killed him too.”

“B-But I had no reason to kill him, bro!”

“No reason? Maybe Prowteg caught you burying your little magnets,” I said. “So you killed him to keep him from telling anyone.”

“Prowteg totally knew what I was doing! He’s seen me do it before!” McGee yelled. “Just, like, ask coach Coach. He’ll vouch for meee?”

Uhh… what?

“What the hell are you bringin’ me into this for?” Coach jumped out of his seat. “Can’t you ever keep your mouth shut?” To be fair, I had yet to see a Grand Slime’s mouth.

“Mr. Coach!” the king’s voice rumbled like thunder. “You knew about this?”

The crow man scratched his head with one of his claws. “Y-Yes, your majesty. I knew what McGee was doin’.”

“Did Prowteg?” I asked.

“He knew.” Coach glared at me. “He… was cheatin’ too.” The audience gasped. Violetta started to whimper.

“What nonsense is this?” Lyili slammed her fists down. “Do you mean to tell us that the Janitors are nothing but cheats?”

“I’m not sayin’ that,” Coach snapped back. “It was just the two of ‘em.”

“I… can’t accept this, coach!” It was Sidkik jumping up from his seat this time. “Prowteg was no cheater.”

“Y-You saw how he plays lately!” Coach seemed flustered. “He’s… lost his touch. Cheatin’ was the only way he was gonna make it to the World Series!” A rain of boos came from the crowd.

“You’re the worst!” someone yelled.

“Fuck the Janitors!”

“Prowteg? More like Cheateg, am I right? …Am I right fellas?”

Something was off. Judging by this reaction, cheating seemed like a career ender. Why were Coach and McGee so willing to admit to it? I had a theory, but it was meaningless unless I had something to back it up. I needed evidence.

“Hey Lyili,” I yelled to her over the crowd. “Did your team collect some bocce balls from the crime scene?”

“Of course they did, Sir Allard.” She flipped her long black hair over her shoulder. “Who do you take me for?”

“Perfect. I’m gonna need them.”

Lyili raised an eyebrow. “For what?”

“Hey!” I banged on my table a few times to quiet everyone down. “McGee, I have an offer for you.”

“Offeeer?”

“That’s right.” I smiled. “Play me in bocce ball.”

“Sir Allard! It’s hardly the time for games!”

“If I win, you have to tell me the truth about last night. If you win, then I’ll stop saying you killed Prowteg.” I pointed at him. “This is a pretty sweet deal, don’t you think?”

“Sir McGee, you have no obligation to agree to Sir Allard’s ridiculous proposal,” Lyili said. “He’s desperate…”

McGee cut her off. “I’ll do iiit?”

Lyili practically fell over. “W-What?”

“I, like, acceeept?”

Suddenly, Violetta jolted back to her feet. “Destroy him, Ryley!”

Holy shit, that practically gave me a heart attack. “Are you… alright?”

“I’m fine!” She grabbed both of my hands in hers. “You have to win! For the Janitor’s honor!” I didn’t really get it, but I was glad she was talking again. Ugh, never thought I’d feel like that.

“Very well,” the king said. “We will hold a bocce ball game immediately.”

“Your majesty, if I can offer my services,” a voice made for TV said. A moment later, anchor pig scuttled out of the audience on all fours. “I’d like to commentate the match.”

“Ooo! Me too!” Violetta yelled. “I’m doing that too!”

The king put his hand into the air. “Guards, clear the floor.”

Awesome, McGee had taken the bait.

Not that I knew how to play this dumb game.