I didn’t fall asleep. Too many questions, too many thoughts. So I practiced Violet’s way of not-sleep.

How had the Dark God’s lackey found me? What had happened in that alley?

My 【Project Fear】 had not worked on that guy. And he had been stronger and faster than me… Had I not received training from Vallachio, my guts would have spilled all over the place.

Maybe I should have thrown fewer insults against his shitty god. My lack of fear could be a disadvantage sometimes.

I had expected Violet to put someone to watch over me. It was the obvious thing to do. I would have done the same had I found some dude from another world with game-changing knowledge like me.

Then someone else had run past me. I guess another secret bodyguard? I didn’t see him well. I had been kinda distracted at that moment staring at the two engaging in parkour combat.

Whatever, I thought. I was not going to remain there in case those two jobbed against the evil god’s cultist. I believed in letting professionals do their jobs. Better than staying underfoot like a misguided scrub with hero delusions.

Thinking about it, if the evil god had known my exact location, he would’ve sent the cultist straight to my room. Which left the question, how was ExFeras intruding on my dreams without direct contact? Had he been sending a spiritual tendril toward me, I would have seen it during my out-of-body experiments. Also, my obsidian-lacquered blanket was supposed to protect me from direct contact.

How was I intercepted en route? Did the cultist follow ExFeras scent or something?

I spent an hour or two with my amateurish attempt at losing a tail. I hoped I had done it right, and no one had followed me back to the inn.

I decided to wait until tomorrow before telling my friends, who had already retired into their rooms. I didn’t want to interrupt their sleep.

Just in case, I spelled door and windows so I’d get a warning if anyone approached.

Also, I put a sack under the sheets, with a static illusion for my face. Meanwhile, I rested hidden while keeping my aura closed off, wrapped in the antimagic blanket. My favorite mace close by, recently enhanced with kinetic enchantments for extra power.

I smiled.

And let’s not forget about the motherload of magic flashbangs I had packed under the sheets. They were a rush job and not as good as those made with Bart and Vezlaz, but I counted on the numbers to make up for it.

It was the equivalent of twenty flashbangs. Whoever approached that bed was gonna end crippled long enough to meet my mace, no matter how strong.

Good luck ambushing me, demon cultists motherfuckers.

The ruckus would also wake up the kids, attract patrols in the proximity, and other possible allies. It was a great plan. Also, I wouldn’t waste people’s time if nothing happened.

Well, maybe I did want the cultists to come and see how effective my trap was. And to let Mace-chan drink some blood. I haven’t killed anything in so long!

So I waited.

I am machine

I never sleep

I keep my eyes wide open

I mentally played thematically appropriate music while I not-slept.

It was only when sunlight pierced the darkness that I came to the grim realization that all my planning had been for naught.

Sorry, Mace-chan. Looks like we’ll have to postpone your blood-drinking. I gave an affectionate pat to the mace beside me.

If I ever have a son, I’ll give him a mace plushie instead of a lame teddy bear. I’m sure a mace is more comforting against darkness and nightmares, right?

I stood up from my hiding spot and stretched out lazily.

And I had a dawning realization.

「Allen: Oh shit!」

I muttered.

With all the excitement, I had completely forgotten… This morning I had to attend the Alchemy exam!

I had planned to prepare yesterday evening. Instead, I had spent the whole time losing imaginary tails and coming up with deathtraps… I had to get ready!

「Allen: Fuck.」

I carefully disarmed all the traps and set to work.

Thankfully the not-sleep had replenished some of my energies, and the clarity of staying at the First Step would do the rest.

I mentally played out the steps to brew the damn potion and reread the notes. I prepared the alchemical equipment I needed to bring with me and got moving.

The trio was still asleep, and breakfast wasn’t ready yet, but I hadn’t time to wait.

Reporting this to Violet was my first priority.

Unfortunately, Violet wasn’t in her office. The clerks said she’d be available after noon.

I doubted I’d get attacked again during the daytime, so I chose to wait and focus on the exam.

Maybe she’s busy or this isn’t urgent? With nothing better to do, I focused on my studies.

The second Alchemy exam was much harder than the previous one. Even the theory had been full of tricky questions and obscure references. Thankfully, I had a searchable database inside my magic ring. It was surprising that they didn’t ask us to remove our enchanted paraphernalia. What if someone used a communication ring to cheat the theory?

Or maybe they had some countermeasures in place, but I wasn’t aware of it. Which was more likely. Well, they’d rethink their policies if they knew how much information I could store in a simple ring.

Now came the tricky part, getting the 【Night Sight Potion】 right. I knew I could do it. I just had to stick to the exact quantities and procedures refined in my previous attempts. Only thinking about all the money Id wasted on reagents made my face turn pale.

I needed to join the Alchemist’s Guild. I had to find new recipes, sell potions for money, and stockpile my party members with absurd amounts of potions in order to save them from themselves.

I thought back at the hellhounds trek around the mountains. I knew how it was gonna end. Thank god I was a cynical pessimist, or we’d have ended up as roast.

Lopu’s ancient-looking figure walked in front of me.

「Lopu: Allow me…」

I let him make sure I hadn’t any hidden vial of premade potions on me or on with the equipment. There was no cheating on the potion-making.

Everyone was at their own desk with self or Academy provided equipment. I had my own, obviously. It was impossible to get this potion done with unfamiliar tools. It was all about precision dosages. Those using unfamiliar equipment were at a big disadvantage.

Lopu turned the usual hourglass upside down and watched us closely as we started brewing our potions.

I did it like practiced, finishing with just enough time to take a breather. Honestly, I thought the stringent time limit was overkill. It’s like they wanted us to fail.

No, they definitely wanted us to fail. More failures meant more money flowing in.

There was a murmur of muttered curses from those who didn’t make it in time. Not as many as the previous exam.

After sending off the disqualified applicants and letting our brews cool off, Lopu called us by name. I was first.

He led me inside a dimly lit adjacent room. In the middle, there was a device, shaped like binoculars but bulkier and without objective lenses, a long pole keeping it in place and providing height adjustability.

「Lopu: Very well, drink your potion and put the device over your eyes.」

I didn’t drink it all because it was morning and a full vial lasted approximately half an hour.

I saw Lopu nodding. Shit, was drinking the right amount also part of the test? I was starting to get paranoid about this exam. In seconds, the previously dimly lit room became as bright as direct sunlight.

I moved the device against my eyes and looked inside. I noticed a flutter of multicolored antimagic energy. I assumed to dissuade those attempting to cheat by other means.

「Lopu: Good… now tell me everything you see.」

He started operating the device. Images and words at differing amounts of brightness began flashing before my eyes, and I relayed what I saw.

I froze over when I encountered the first too-bright picture. I felt the cold sweat forming on my forehead as I shut my eyes from the excessive brightness.

Fuck! Was my potion too strong? No, I had tuned it for comfortable use at night. The only use case of practical use.

Was this another pitfall to trick me into failing the test? What to do…

The image was just too strong. I wouldn’t be able to see whatever it was. Worse, the attempt may even blind me for the rest of the test.

「Allen: Too bright…」

I admitted, expecting the test to end.

But it didn’t. Another word to read came up, and then another, and another, until the test was over.

「Lopu: You can move away from the device.」

I did so and looked at Lopu, awaiting judgment. He stared me back with his drooping eyelids.

COME ON, JUST SAY IT, OLD MAN! The suspense was killing me.

I realized what the test was all about, gauging if my potion delivered the correct range of vision. Not too strong. Not too weak.

「Lopu: Let’s return to the main room.」

Did I miscalculate?

I shielded my eyes to avoid the brightness and followed the teacher. Once we crossed the threshold, he cleared his throat and announced…

「Lopu: Allen Smith has passed the exam.」

Whew. I breathed a sigh of relief.

「Allen: Thank you, sir.」

He nodded and gestured to the benches against the wall.

「Lopu: You can wait out the effects before collecting your certification.」

Then he called the next name, and so on.

In the end, only three people passed the exam.

I did not advertise the new line of glassware on this occasion. The wannabe alchemists could suffer a little longer.

I was finally qualified to join the Alchemist’s Guild, and I did not want fresh competition underfoot.

I checked again in case Violet had left a message for me. No such luck. I told the clerks I’d be at the Alchemist’s Guild if she needed to get in contact before lunchtime.

That done, I didn’t waste time. I headed to the Alchemist’s Guild, paid the fees, and signed the papers.

Only then did they reveal that I still had to complete an apprenticeship before actually being allowed to sell potions.

Annoying, but I only knew how to brew three potions. The recipes weren’t so conveniently available, not even in the Academy’s library.

「Clerk: Do you already have a senior alchemist sponsoring you?」

「Allen: No.」

I admitted. Was that a fuck up?

「Clerk: We’ll assign someone to you, then. Please take a seat in the waiting room for the interview.」

I did so.

No one was there but me. I thought about the other two students who had passed the exam. The early bird gets the worm.

And the seeds, and the fruits, and all that is edible.

「Clerk: The Guild Master is ready to see you.」

Announced the clerk. I stood up and let him escort me to the Guild Master’s office.

The Guild Master turned out to be a woman, looking in her late fifties. But considering how much mana could increase a lifespan, she was probably older.

She waved at the empty chair, inviting me to take a seat before her.

「Guild Master: So… Allen Smith. I see you acquired your certification for intermediate alchemy just today. You don’t waste time, do you?」

「Allen: No, ma’am.」

「Guild Master: Are you of noble descent?」

「Allen: No, ma’am.」

「Guild Master: I hear from your accent that you are a foreigner. Why did you decide to join the local guild?」

「Allen: Because…」

Because it’s here. I hated these stupid questions.

「Allen: I have business dealings here in Valarest and expect to be around for a long time.」

「Guild Master: I see.」

She crossed her arms. Scanning me with an appraising stare.

「Guild Master: Any particular goal for joining the Alchemist’s Guild?」

I need money.

「Allen: Money, recipes, business opportunities, keeping my party members alive.」

She raised an eyebrow.

That was more than I was trying to say. I narrowed my eyes. Spiritual interference? I had to pay more attention…

「Guild Master: You are also an adventurer? Oh my, how intriguing…」

I didn’t like her tone. A malicious smile spread on her lips. I hoped she wasn’t planning on asking me sexual favors… Suddenly I was feeling uncomfortable.

「Allen: …」

I remained silent, hoping she would stop digging into my personal affairs.

「Guild Master: I see you are well-toned under those clothes.」

I shifted uncomfortably, still keeping my smiling poker face. What do normal people do in these situations?

「Allen: I don’t want to die.」

That was what came out of my mouth. I’ll admit, not exactly one of my best thought lines.

The GM scoffed.

「Guild Master: Oh-ho? I almost get the impression that you’re not feeling safe in here.」

I kept my mouth shut. I knew that my lips were going to say something insulting about her being too old for me.

Never had I imagined I was going to deal with a mana-powered cougar. I needed protection from spiritual interference.

Working out had turned out to be a mistake, after all.

「Guild Master: Ah well, enough of that. You’re looking for an alchemist under which to carry out your apprenticeship…」

She sighed.

「Guild Master: I’m afraid that most of our Master Alchemists are already occupied or with prearranged engagements. But… ah, right. We have old Zavir, always in need of new apprentices!」

The way she said it… Why do I feel there’s a catch? Of course, there was a catch. That’s just my luck.

「Guild Master: He was acclaimed as the most renowned alchemist in the kingdom. I’m sure you’ll learn many important lessons under his tutelage.」

She smiled again, maliciously. Probabilities of a catch exceeding 100%.

「Allen: Thank you, ma’am.」

I tried to sound grateful.

「Guild Master: Were you to find the accommodation… lacking. Be sure to come back here for… an alternative arrangement.」

Another suggestive jab. The discomfort was reaching critical levels.

「Allen: That won’t be necessary.」

I said, hastily rising from the chair and bowing.

「Allen: Thank you for your time, ma’am.」

「Guild Master: Be sure to check in with the clerk in the evening for finalizing the terms of your apprenticeship.」

「Allen: I will.」

I said, bowing again before escaping from her predatory gaze.

She didn’t even offer her name. Maybe it was customary of her position? I only knew the best course of action was avoiding her as much as possible.

Why was it always so easy to get unwanted attention?

I walked out to the fresh air.

And smelled burnt.

Several people were amassing in the streets, murmuring about something. I was getting a vibe of “happening” and decided to inquire.

「Allen: Excuse me, what happened?」

「Did you not hear?」

「The food storages! Someone set fire to the food storages!」

I fucking knew it! My sense for bad management decisions had been right after all. Even my grandma cautioned against putting all eggs into one basket.

「First the Madness… and now this…」

Unrest was growing to a degree even I could notice. This didn’t look good.

It was also time to put some food in my belly and tell the guys about my unfortunate encounter.

And then pay Violet a visit.

The lack of communication was giving me bad vibes. I didn’t even feel in the mood to brag about passing the exam.

One task at a time… So, the food storages burned down, eh? I had prepared for this. I rushed toward Corgas’ place.

My MMO clanmates had taught me the correct approach for situations of scarcity.

Raise the prices.