《A Snail's Wisdom》Chapter 103: How Else Do You Wear a Belt?
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An enormous, fiery explosion engulfed the dome of vines they were trapped within.
Kenja and most of the onlookers had just recovered from the blinding light of the Fourth Elder's clap, only to be startled by the thunderous roar and fierce heat erupting in front of them.
The few Core Crystallization experts who had recovered much earlier struggled to keep up with the sudden changes on the battlefield as the three battling elders no longer restrained their pace for their benefit. All they could piece together was that all three elders were in dire straits with respect to their clothing and the intensity of this explosion could very well have annihilated full-blown sheep coats, let alone what was left of their trousers.
A feeling of déjà vu washed over everyone as three separate trails of smoke escaped the aftermath. Last time this occurred, none of the elders had lost, but this was unlikely to happen a second time, especially after that terrifying blast.
"Che, che, che."
With each snicker, a cloud of smoke and dust was pushed away from one of the figures to reveal Sixth Elder Gao Diao's pale, yet valiant figure. His body was shaky from the combined side-effects of the numerous pills he had taken and the energy he overdrafted in a short period of time.
His skin-tight, white leggings was scorched with black marks and tears, its length ending at his knees in a burnt fashion.
Although his pants were technically the closest to the explosion, they were evidently reinforced with enchantments beforehand. Still, they did not escape unharmed.
[Wind Whispers] flooded the background.
"What are those?"
"Those aren't the same pants he was wearing before, were they?"
"What happened, senior brother? We didn't see."
Most of the disciples had not witnessed the reveal of Gao Diao's third set of pants. They could only rely on the older and more powerful disciples to clarify what had happened.
"That's his third one?"
"Is it true? Did the second one really blow up in Fourth Elder's hands?"
"Sixth Elder dared to line his pants with so many explosive talismans…truly fearsome! I should do that as well!"
Kenja was also incapable of watching the past few seconds and had to make do with Snail's awful commentary to understand.
"The fat one and the skinny one attacked the tiny one together. Boom, pow, kachow. Some swooshing and slashing. Oh yeah, they ate some pills. The tiny one was losing, so he clapped his hands and things went flashy-flashy! Then, he swiped the skinny one's pants, which means I won the bet! I won! All those stones are mine now!" Kenja's earlobe jiggled excitedly as Snail danced in pleasure.
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"And what happened after that, Snail?"
"Oh, uh, that's right…then, they reached this point.
Kenja's eye twitched at Snail's explanation.
With such a slipshod summary, Kenja could tell that Snail obviously stopped paying attention once he realized he had won the wager, leaving out some major details like the dome of vines that appeared on the battlefield and the humongous explosion that shortly followed the "flashy-flashy".
"Che, how long do you two plan to hide in the smoke? Accept your defeat."
"Hmph." Kondo's snort dissipated the smoke hiding him. "What defeat? Mine aren't much worse than yours, Sixth Brother."
His bright yellow fundoshi had turned a darker shade from all the black smoke as the twisted straps along his waist had been severed in several spots. Third Elder Kondo was pinching the underwear at several points with both of his hands to keep it from falling down.
Gao Diao stifled his laughter. "Do you plan to fight like that, Third Brother, che, che, che?"
Kondo's face reddened in shame, but he did not yield. "The fight isn't over, so I don't see why not. I can beat you without my hands."
Kondo had been situated the furthest from the explosion's point of origin with Sixth Elder Gao Diao standing in between, so his underwear had endured the least amount of blast force from the shock wave. If that were not the case, his yellow undergarment would have probably disintegrated in its entirety.
Gao Diao rolled his eyes in silence, not bothering with him any further.
If Kondo had to fight without using his arms, he would definitely lose. As long as Ariyoshi Miji was eliminated, Gao Diao was assured of his victory.
They turned to look at the third shorter figure cloaked in smoke and dust.
"This was a good match, Fourth Brother. I was lucky to have won this time, but I might not be so lucky next time." Gao Diao gave him a platform to concede gracefully, allowing him to leave before revealing his nude figure to the entire sect.
Even before the explosion enveloped the three of them, Ariyoshi Miji's pants had reached such a dismal state that they covered less than Kondo's fundoshi.
There was no response.
Whispers abound again.
"Did Fourth Elder lose, too?"
"Third and Sixth Elder teamed up against him, so that isn't too surprising."
"But look at Third and Sixth Elder. The fight was still so close!"
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"So amazing!"
"We don't have all day, Fourth Brother…"
The previous time, it was Gao Diao who had emerged last from the dust to astound everyone with his trick. Now, Ariyoshi Miji was building suspense by not directly dissipating the cloud hiding him.
No longer having the confidence to win in this state, Kondo hoped that his shorter brother was not eliminated so that they could cooperate. Otherwise, he would have conceded earlier and left instead of stubbornly holding up his fundoshi in denial.
Once Ariyoshi Miji lost, Gao Diao's victory was a sure thing.
Everyone wondered the same thing.
Did the Fourth Elder have a trick up his sleeve as well?
"If you're just going to hide," he turned his face upward and spoke, "Vice Elder, please announce the results."
"Why the rush, Sixth Brother? Aren't you the one always expounding on the importance of patience?"
The cocky-sounding elder waved away the smoke to reveal his head and upper torso, yet for some reason, the smoke around his lower body was condensed, hiding it from view.
Gao Diao blinked at him indifferently as if he were looking at a complete idiot.
"Vice Elder, announce the results."
Vice Elder Bai trembled at the unusual solemnity Sixth Elder Gao Diao expressed. He cleared his throat to announce the end of the match.
"Whoa, whoa! What results? I still haven't lost my pants!" Ariyoshi Miji's long, black beard was pointed up at Vice Elder Bai, daring him to say otherwise.
"You shameless monkey! You're not fooling anyone with your little dustcloud. Not only can we see through it, even the youngsters who have established their foundation can peer through it if they squint hard enough. Now, cover up your shameful, miniscule thing before you traumatize my disciple!"
Gao Diao had noticed that Shimizu Mizutani's gaze was on the floor, so he assumed she turned her sights away from the nude, old man out of shyness. His heart was warmed when he thought of how innocent and naive his Little Mizu still was and how happy she must be to have witnessed his valiant victory over two other elders of the sect.
Little did he know that she was looking away, not because of the nude Fourth Elder, but because she could no longer focus on the match results.
'He was actually wearing more than one pants this whole time! Why, Master?! Why couldn't you win with just one? If you need more to win, then just lose! Now I have to come up with thirty middle-tier spirit stones! I don't have such wealth!' Shimizu Mizutani focused on the grass below her as she quietly calculated her options.
'All the pills I have stored should be enough for two spirit stones. My plants and ingredients should net me another stone. If I sell both of my furnaces, I could get another twelve, maybe thirteen. Everything else I own should amount to five, I think. Combined with the two spirit stones Master gave me for cultivation, that's at least twenty-three stones…'
Bah! Even if she sold everything to the point of becoming destitute, it would take her several more years of hard and dedicated work to pay off the difference.
As a Core Crystallization expert, the myriad of missions she could undertake would yield a much greater return than the odd jobs offered to the servants and Qi Flourishing disciples while her occupation as a spiritual pill refiner was also lucrative if she focused on synthesizing high-demand pills with simpler recipes.
Taking into account her direct discipleship to a sect elder, she was doted on by the whole sect as a whole with a significant allowance compared to the other disciples.
Yet none of these things could pull her out of the hole she dug herself.
"Miniscule your whiskers! Look at this, you blind, old coot!"
The Fourth Elder pulled up a white belt from the dust cloud covering his lower body, showing it off by rotating it around his body several times.
"Your belt…?"
Everyone stared dumbly at him.
This man acted as if one's waist belt could also count as pants. Surely, he could not be serious.
The Sixth Elder shot a warning glance at Vice Elder Bai that caused him to shiver in fear.
He did not require any urging from Gao Diao to agree that a belt could not substitute for pants.
"Your belt does not count, elder."
Ariyoshi Miji gave Gao Diao and Vice Elder Bai a cold look.
"Who said anything about a belt?"
With these words, his fingers pulled at a string wrapped around the belt outwards in a suggestive manner.
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