《Heather the Necromancer》2-15 For Pizza

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Heather tapped her fingers on the table as Frank paced the room of the tower. Quinny leaned against the wall, impassively watching the display.

“He said it was two days northeast,” Heather stated.

“That’s a little more than twice the distance to Moon’s town,” Frank pointed out.

“This town has pizza,” Heather pointed out. “The risk is obviously worth it.”

Quinny laughed from her place on the wall and nodded her agreement. “I think we should go.”

Heather watched Frank pace like a caged animal as the worry about trying to blend with players again tormented him.

“Was it really that bad?” Quinny asked.

“I was once bound and dragged out of the graveyard. They dragged me about a mile away while they mocked me and then reset me.”

Quinny folded her arms. “I would be upset about that too.”

“You're not going alone this time,” Heather said. “Besides, you won't be in the graveyard to be dragged away. The binding stone will protect you if anything happens.”

She jumped when Frank turned on her and narrowed his eyes.

“And what if they try to kill you?” he asked.

Heather leaned back in her chair as she grappled with the thought. She was playing a human and could blend in easily, but that was no guarantee. She was once attacked by a paladin who assumed she was a necromancer for being next to Frank. No matter how she rationalized it, she was in danger if she traveled with him.

“I will bring my bone knight,” she said, assuming that would soothe his worries.

“Only a necromancer can summon that,” Frank pointed out. “He will tell everyone who you are.”

“And the skeletons don’t?” Heather asked.

“Several other classes can summon skeletons and even zombies. Only a necromancer can summon the more powerful undead, or summon them in great numbers.”

“Then we leave him behind and bring the three skeletons. Those come from the recluse class anyway. I can be honest and tell people I am a recluse.”

“And how will you explain Quinny and I?” he asked.

Heather glanced at Quinny and looked her up and down. Her hair was wildly thrown about her shoulders but could easily be tied back. With a good brushing and a decent dress, nothing would give away what she was but her face and eyes.

Heather tapped a finger on the table as she thought. Quinny could wear the sunbonnet to hide her face from passing glances, but somebody would get a good look sooner or later. She needed a way to hide the scars and brighten the color of the woman's skin. She thought of what she looted from Moon and smiled as the answer came to her.

“We can disguise Quinny,” Heather said. “I have Moon's makeups and powders. A little work and she will be a pale-skinned woman.

“Nothing is going to hide my eyes,” Quinny said.

“You can wear my hat,” Heather said. “Keep the brim low, and nobody will notice.”

“And how will you hide me?” Frank asked as he held his arms out. “I don’t even have a normal human shape.”

Heather chewed on a lip as she tried to think of a solution. He was right, his legs and arms were long and gangly. He walked on his toes, but hunched over, nearly dragging his long claws in the dirt. Despite this posture, he stood head and shoulders above her and was close to seven feet tall when he stood straight. His skin was gray and rubbery with darker patches, and his head had tufts of jagged hair. His most distinguishing features were on his face, however. He had no nose to speak of, just two little slits, and his mouth was wrapped by thin lips that didn't even begin to cover his jagged teeth. However, it was his eyes that drew attention even from a distance. His lidless eyes were twice the size of a normal human. They were a dull yellow that seemed to glow from within. She knew there was no amount of makeup that was going to hide him.

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“Alright, I admit we are taking a risk,” she said. “I am terrified of dying, no matter how many times you tell me I will come back. I also know you were treated terribly by players and that it will happen again. But we can't sit here for the next hundred years hiding from people,” Heather said. “We all need things that can only be gotten in a town, and this town has pizza. I say we try it one time and run if there is any trouble.”

“I could always use another level in running,” Quinny joked.

Frank stood in place and scratched at his head with a long nail. “You are sure you want to do this?”

“Think of pizza,” Heather pressed. “He said they used too much cheese. Have you ever heard of something so wonderful?”

“I like sausage,” he said.

“I am sure they have sausage,” Heather said. “No self-respecting restaurant would dare to claim to have pizza but not have sausage.”

“I once had a pizza that used breakfast sausage,” Quinny said.

Heather looked at her with a raised brow. “Where did you get that?”

Quinny shrugged. “It was hotel room service. I was too tired to go looking for someplace to eat.”

Heather nodded in appreciation. She ordered room service before and been horrified at the outcome. She turned back to Frank and decided to make it easier for him.

“If you really don't want to go, we won't go. I just thought we could get out and do something once in a while.”

“You two aren’t dating, you’re married,” Quinny laughed.

Heather shot her an angry glare, and Quinny only laughed harder.

“I wonder if they have cheese sticks?” Frank asked.

“See, now your thinking the right way,” Heather said with a pleased smile. “I bet they have all sorts of things from the real world. Burgers, fries, beer, maybe even gyros.”

“Stop,” Frank said, holding up a hand. “I would kill for a good gyro.”

“Pfft, that has to be super easy to make,” Quinny said. “It's basically all sheep, and they have plenty of those here. I know they grow grain for bread, as well. I read a whole article on farming in New Eden.”

Heather looked at her with a slight smile. “I can’t imagine you ever considering farming.”

Quinny tsked and tilted her head. “I considered a lot of things. But I wanted to try something completely different. I might still try it if I reset.”

“Will you flip a coin?” Heather teased.

Quinny shrugged. “Probably.”

Heather wanted to hand her a coin, but Frank spoke.

“I am willing to try if you want,” he said. “If I can’t get in, maybe you could get something and bring it out.”

Heather saw the desire for some comfort food in his dead eyes, or at least she imagined she did. It was hard to tell anything with Frank by looking in his eyes, and when he somehow blinked, it made her skin crawl.

“So, we are going then?” she asked hopefully.

“You don’t need my permission to go,” he said. “You could always go yourself, or with Quinny.”

“I know, but I want you to come with. You're my friend, and Quinny will probably embarrass me.”

“I absolutely will embarrass you,” Quinny said.

“See!” Heather pleaded with a wave of her hand at Quinny. “You have to come with.” She gave him the big eyes and chewed on her lip to drive the point home.

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“I already said ok,” he grumbled. “I just want you to know you don’t have to take me everywhere you go.”

Heather shook her head. “I know, but you have been there since the I got here. I feel safer knowing you’re nearby.”

“Married for at least ten years,” Quinny said.

“Will you stop it!” Heather snapped.

Quinny folded her arms and smiled in returned.

Heather wanted to throw something at her but decided to get the group moving instead.

“Let's get you a dress, and we can go,” Heather said.

“Wait, you were serious? You want to try and hide my zombieness?”

“If you want to walk into town and not draw attention,” she said.

“But, I like my zombie dress.”

“Even if they don't see you as a zombie, they will think your some kind of beggar instead. You can't go into a restaurant wearing a dress that looks like you just crawled out of a grave in.

“Fine, let’s get it over with,” Quinny relented.

“Not here,” Heather said. “We can pick a nice dress from my collection and pack it in a basket. I will get the other things we need and bring it all with. We can disguise you when we are much closer to town.

“Why not now?” Quinny asked.

“The makeup won't last two days,” Heather pointed out. “By the time we get there, you will look like a punk rocker who got caught in the rain.”

They all agreed, and Heather took Quinny into her room to pick out a dress.

“You need a bigger bed,” Quinny said as she looked through the dresses.

“Why do I need a bigger bed?” Heather asked.

“That’s too small for both you and Frank,” she teased.

Heather huffed and folded her arms. “You need to stop insinuating that we are anything but friends because that's all we are, friends.”

“Sure you are,” Quinny said as she took out a black dress.

Heather was growing annoyed with the snide remarks but decided to keep them in as Quinny held the dress out.

“That will only make your pale skin stand out,” Heather pointed out. “Pick something with a lighter color.”

“How many dresses did you take from Moon?” Quinny asked as she looked through the wardrobe.”

“Moon had a seamstress in her town, and she looted the poor woman's shop after a raid. She had two dozen dresses piled up in that locked room.”

“I saw the pile,” Quinny said. “I just had no idea you took so many.”

Quinny pulled out one with a cream top and a pleated green skirt. She looked it up and down as Heather fumed over her comments. Maybe she needed to say something to make sure Quinny understood.

“I meant what I said,” Heather continued. “Frank and I are just friends.”

Quinny glanced back and shrugged. “You two fight like an old married couple. You even play at each other like you have known one another for twenty years. It makes the jokes easy.”

“Frank is a ghoul,” Heather said.

“So?” Quinny asked. “He is a human from the same world we come from.”

“But he is a ghoul now,” Heather insisted. “He is a great guy, but I have some requirements for appearance.”

“Don’t we all,” Quinny laughed. “But have you ever considered that he could be anything he wanted?”

Heather twisted uncomfortably at the comment and wondered where it was going.

“He could be reset and choose to come back as something else. He could walk back here looking like that hammer guy.”

“He wasn’t that cute,” Heather insisted. “Besides, Frank loves playing the ghoul.”

“And what if he picked a muscled barbarian warrior, and stood at your side protecting you?”

Heather paused a moment to think about it and shook her head.

“He wouldn’t,” she said flatly.

“You thought about it,” Quinny laughed. “You like him, but you can’t see past the avatar.”

“Can you?” Heater asked in annoyance.

“Nope,” Quinny said. “He is radiation mutant levels of ugly.”

Heather struggled not to laugh at the colorful comment. She watched as Quinny held the dress over her form and looked at the outcome.

“I don't mean to upset you,” Quinny went on. “I just have trouble walking past a joke. If I see something that I think is funny, I blurt it out. I think Frank is a good guy, too, and I wouldn't be beyond considering him, but he is so hard to look at.”

“But he could change?” Heather asked more to herself as she pondered it.

Quinny looked back at her and smiled. “If he comes back here all tall, tan-skinned, and muscled, you and I are going to fight for him.”

Heather laughed and shook her head. “You have Harkinor.”

Quinny shrugged and flattened the dress over her body.

“Is this one any better?” she asked.

“I think it suits you,” Heather said.

“I haven’t worn a skirt this long in my life,” Quinny said as she flared it out.

“I like the long dresses,” Heather said. “They feel natural.”

Quinny smirked. “Nothing about this place is natural.”

They settled on the dress and packed it along with face powders and creams in a basket. She added a small bag of gold and silver she collected from previous adventurers before heading out. They went to the lower floor and collected her three skeletons from the yard. These she charged with holding her basket and her scythe. She ordered the bone knight to guard the tower, and it made a strange nod of its head in reply.

“Did he just nod?” Heather asked.

Quinny turned to look back at the skeleton. “I dunno.”

Heather pondered it a moment but moved on when Frank called from the graveyard.

“I was thinking,” he said. “We might save some time by going across the grasslands instead of following the road.”

“But how will we know where to turn?” Heather asked.

“We know we turn right at the crossroads. So if we walk roughly northeast, we should walk into the road we need,” he said.

Heather looked in the direction she believed was northeast but could only see Quinny’s trees. “If you think it will be safe.”

“The road won’t be any safer,” he pointed out. “And we will run into fewer players.”

“Then let’s go. I have a date with extra cheese and pepperoni,” Heather insisted.

Frank took the lead and led them out with the skeletons walking behind. They crossed through the forest and made their way to the road with dreams of food. Just as they arrived at the road, they startled a very shocked Grettah.

“Stay away!” she cried, holding up her spear.

“Grettah!” Heather said with hands over her mouth. “I am so sorry. I didn't mean to kill you.”

“You sent that skeleton after me?” Grettah asked.

Heather nodded in shame. “Something was in the forest howling and killing other players. We were looking for it and stumbled on you. I didn’t know it was you when I sent the skeleton in.”

Grettah's ears twitched nervously, and she stepped back on her cloven feet.

“I don’t believe you,” she said.

Heather felt guilty and tried to think of some way to make it up to her. She finally thought of something and smiled broadly.

“Hey, do you want to come with us for pizza?”

Grettah's long ears twitched again, and she took another step back. She looked as if she wanted to run, but a moment later, she looked around nervously.

“You’re going for pizza?”

“We sure are,” Heather said. “Come with us.”

Grettah’s mouth twisted in an odd sort of pucker as she thought about it. Heather wondered just how many people here missed food from the real world. She watched as Grettah struggled to make a decision to trust them or not.

“I don’t know if it’s safe,” she finally said.

“You’re still level one, you have nothing to lose,” Quinny said.

“And potentially pizza to gain,” Heather insisted.

“Are you going to bribe everyone with Pizza?” Frank asked.

“I’m not bribing her. I am trying to make it up to her.”

“Or you’re trying to lure me out to eat me,” Grettah said.

“You are part goat,” Quinny laughed. “You’re practically pepperoni.”

“I’m not a goat! It’s more of an alpaca,” Grettah replied.

“Come with us,” Heather insisted. “We just learned about a town two days from here. They are supposed to have dwarven pizza.”

Grettah lowered her spear just a little and fluttered her ears.

“What makes it dwarven?”

Heather shrugged. “I don’t know, but we’re going to find out.”

“Two days is a long walk,” Grettah said. “I want to get a couple of levels before I wander too far from spawn.”

“Then go with Heather,” Frank said dryly. “She practically summons trouble. You will be level five by the time we reach the town.”

“Oh, ha, ha,” Heather quipped. “I didn’t hear you complaining when you leveled.”

Quinny snorted as Frank laughed at Heather.

Heather gave them both a firm glare before turning back to Grettah. “Listen, I know you have no reason to trust us, but Quinny is right. You literally have nothing to lose.”

“I could use another spear,” Quinny said.

Heather closed her eyes as she shook her head in frustration. “Please, will you come with us? I will pay for the pizza.”

Grettah lowered the spear and sighed. “Sure, I guess. I mean, I could set my home there, and stop resetting when I die.”

“Then it’s perfect,” Heather said with a smile.

“Perfect for you,” Frank suggested.

“Are you going to be a grump?” she asked.

“Only if you get us killed,” he replied.

“I am prepared to take that risk for pizza, lead on,” she added, pointing across the grasslands.

He walked off with Heather at his side, heading into the grasslands.

Grettah leaned over to Quinny as she walked past.

“Are they married?”

Quinny’s laughter could be heard across the open plains.

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