After fully consuming the cobra, Khrx exhaled and lay down, spreading his arms and legs out to the side. The cold cavern floor felt nice on his back. Maybe he’d import some ice into his cavern in the future. His head lolled to the side, and he made eye contact with Mr. Johnson. The men had finally cured their bodies of the poison and finished taking a short rest to recover their mana and vitality.

“Are you ready, Kay?” Mr. Johnson asked.

“You can go without me,” Khrx said with a yawn. Why did he enter this dungeon in the first place? Obviously, it was to eat the meat noodles. And now that he was full, there was no longer a reason for him to stay. He had a tracking skill to learn after all. But for now, he needed a quick nap. He curled up into a ball next to the fire and closed his eyes. Within seconds, his soft snores permeated the tunnel.

“Uh….” The three men exchanged glances.

“Why is he sleeping in game?” Vinny asked.

“Should I rob him?” Randy whispered.

Mr. Johnson smacked the back of Randy’s head, causing him to fall over. “Did you not see him kill that snake?”

“But he’s sleeping now,” Randy muttered and stood up, rubbing his scalp. “Alright, forget it. I don’t rob children.”

“You shouldn’t be robbing anyone,” Vinny said with a snort. “Let’s—”

“Hold on,” Mr. Johnson said. “George just sent me a message. A forum link?”

A hologram took shape in front of Mr. Johnson, and the roaring of wind rang throughout the passage. Khrx’s ears twitched as he sat up with a scowl on his face. In the projection, a feminine figure dressed in a white woolen robe was standing in a wasteland of ice. “This is your favorite reporter, Julia Wonderful, coming to you live from Tanarctica, land of the penguins and the queen of the apocalypse, the blue-skinned empress!”

“The queen of the what now?” Randy asked, furrowing his brow. “What the hell did George send you this for?”

“Shush,” Vinny said, placing his finger on his lips.

“The United Countries have tried to send multiple drones to establish contact with the blue-skinned empress, but as many of you know, the empress destroyed them all while saying she had no respect for people who wouldn’t come in person,” Julia said, speaking directly at Mr. Johnson. “That’s why I, Julia Wonderful, have volunteered to make first contact with her! She’s destroyed dozens of cities, and you’ve seen videos of her rampages on the web, but I don’t believe we’re incapable of communicating with her. Why is she bringing about such rampant destruction? Is she an agent of the apocalypse? Let’s find out in an exclusive interview!”

“This woman has a loose screw in her head,” Randy said with his mouth hanging open. “She’s going to get killed.”

“Agreed,” Vinny said with a nod.

Mr. Johnson furrowed her brow as Julia raised one fist into the air and marched on, the projection following her from her back. “You know, this blue-skinned empress is probably the reason why we’re out here,” he said. “Remember how our special forces all logged out to take care of business and never logged back in? Something tells me it’s related to her.”

A small house gradually came into view as Julia trudged onwards, leaving watery footsteps in the ice behind her. Evidently, she was using a heating spell of some sort to keep warm. “We’re here folks! Home of the blue-skinned empress. Or Saint Nicholas’ estranged cousin’s.” Julia turned around to face Mr. Johnson again. “Now, before I enter, I have a few words I’d like to say. Be sure to comment on, subscribe, and like my video! Thanks for all the wonderful support!” She cleared her throat. “Alright, here we go, folks. The moment of truth.”

Vinny, Randy, and Mr. Johnson swallowed as Julia approached the tiny house and knocked on the door. It swung open, and a massive eyeball with a red iris and a black slit pupil greeted her, filling the entire doorway.

“Ah,” Khrx said. Wasn’t that the right head of Trifelus? What was its name? Rhea? What was the guardian of the underworld doing in reality? Then who was guarding the underworld?

Julia shrieked and fell over backwards, scrambling away with her arms and legs. The massive eye blinked once before disappearing from view, revealing a relatively normal-looking room with Theda sitting on a couch, sipping on a mug. She stood up and walked outside, still holding her cup, and loomed over Julia, filling up the projection. “You are?”

“J-Julia Wonderful, ma’am!” Julia said, her back stiffening. She saluted with one arm, her body unnaturally stiff. “I’m a reporter!”

“A reporter,” Theda said. She paused as she brought her cup to her lips and took a sip. “Oh.”

“Y-yes! Excuse me, Ms. Empress,” Julia said as she raised the microphone in her hand, pointing it at Theda. “What’s your purpose? Why are you destroying cities?”

Theda tilted her head. “Isn’t that obvious? To conquer.”

“To conquer? Can you elaborate on that?” Julia asked.

Theda sighed and raised her head, staring up at the black moon hanging in the sky. “Imagine yourself living in a world without color. Nothing ever happens. One day, a strange, but cute, little thing introduces you to a new world. A vibrant world. One full of color and cheer. And you realize how much you’ve truly missed out on. What would you do?” Theda smiled as she lowered her head and faced Julia. She pointed a finger at Mr. Johnson. “You’d take it for yourself.” A shadowy claw shot out of her finger, causing Mr. Johnson to yelp and dive to the side. The claw grew in size until it filled the whole projection and destroyed it, leaving behind a blue box in the air.

“I was right,” Randy said. “The reporter’s screwed.”

Khrx wrinkled his nose. Theda was stealing his job as the bringer of the end of times. Wait, no. He wasn’t responsible for any apocalypses, what was he saying? Besides, he was the one that brought Theda into reality. Khrx nodded to himself and dusted himself off before waving at the three stunned men. “I’m going now,” he said. “Bye.” He had to hurry up and save Fufu before the upcoming apocalypse affected her.

***

Awakening Cycle 1,072,362: Day 25.

Dear Diary,

This awakening cycle has been the weirdest one yet. I’m glad it’s coming to an end soon. I just hope it lasts long enough for me to get the skills I want out of [Resolution]! Can you believe it though? I’m actually able to improve myself after all these years of stagnation. I can actually acquire new abilities through playing a game. How strange. I hope I save Fufu in time so she can experience some benefits too. My gut is telling me there’s not much longer left before the world ends. Once Fufu is safely back with me, we’ll rob the world of its riches before they’re lost in the upcoming apocalypse.

Love,

Khrx