《Lazy Dragon Queen: Gaming in an Illogical World》[Vol. 6 pt. 21]
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“What—what happened to Master?!” Delphi shouted as she ran up to me. It was… kinda easy to understand why she was freaking out considering that I was carrying Drake on my back and all that. Carrying a passed-out Drake wasn’t something that I think any of them saw me do before.
“He’s fine,” I said and poked his cheek, causing him to grumble and shake his head a little. “See? He’s still alive… somehow.”
“Umm… Master, what do you mean by somehow?”
I looked directly into Delphi’s eyes while I tried to figure out how much detail I should go into.
A… a lot happened after the last chapter ended.
But while I was thinking about how much detail I should go into… my eyes naturally drifted downward like always whenever I was talking to Delphi.
Her boobs were seriously OP looking. So big… so soft… I wanted to knead them like a kitten all day. Seeing them also really made me consider turning myself into a guy every now and then just so that I could… enjoy them in ways that using a girl’s body couldn’t.
Would turning myself into a guy for a chapter or two make readers upset? Hmm. You never know. There have been lots of times on the internet where I’d look at the comments or reviews for something. It’s always totally okay if a guy has a harem of like a hundred waifus who are all expected to love and share him, but if you add even one guy, or potentially even just one person with a penis into that group, then suddenly it’s cuckolding and netorare and blah blah blah. One man can have sex with a hundred girls and it’s okay, but it’s totally cheating and bad if a girl has sex with two guys, even if they’re all part of the same relationship.
Hmm.
Trigger a bunch of kids on the internet who can’t handle a dragon girl temporarily turning into a guy to do lewd things with the protagonist’s waifus, or stick to only ever being a waifu and not getting bad reviews and losing money…
I’ll talk to Drake about it. His opinion is the only one I really care about anyways. If it’d make him feel insecure for me to turn into a guy for a day, I won’t. But if he doesn’t mind, then I am totally doing it.
I wonder if he’d be up for trying some stuff with me while I’m a guy…
Hmm.
Actually, the thought of yaoi fanservice where he pins me against the wall, without actually doing anything lewd to me, is even hotter than the idea of actually doing anything lewd as two guys. I just want him to tease me, and I want to get to tease him, without actually getting lewd.
Since I’ve never done it before… doing anything lewd as a guy with Drake… would probably be too embarrassing. It would be like a noobie tennis player going up against a lifelong tennis player for a match. At least with the other girls, it’d be like being a noobie tennis player, AKA me, versus people who have no interest or experience in playing tennis at all, AKA the other girls.
I wonder how hot I would be as a guy.
Hot dragon husband Vala.
Wait, should I change names temporarily if I turn into a guy?
What would a masculine Vala be?
Uh…
Valk? Valan? Valar? I think I like Valan. Valan, the hot dragon husband who is a super seductive tease whenever he’s not being lazy sleeping and playing vidya games.
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The more I think about Valan, the more I want to turn Drake into Valan instead of turning myself into Valan.
I wonder if Drake would let me turn him into a dragon guy.
Then again, after what he just pulled off in the forest and lived through… he—he’s already on the same level as a dragon even if he isn’t one… somehow…
Seriously, what’s with him?
Both him and Vivi… they’re way too amazing to be just normal humans. Besides, as far as I know, nobody else has ever been like them and had the ability to communicate with the souls of inanimate objects. Not even me, a dragon, could talk to Lake or Valkyria in their true forms. But Drake and Vivi…
Are they really just human?
And that’s without even considering that what we just did in the forest should have absolutely 100000000000% killed him. Sure, he passed out at the end of it… but he survived.
But if him and Vivi aren’t humans… what are they? They would have to be something that even dragons don’t know about… and it shouldn’t be possible for anything to exist that we don’t know about.
Gah! It makes even less sense than water in fire!
Heh.
I wonder how many people will get that reference.
Oh, and while I’m on the topic of confused doggo girls, Delphi has been trying to get my attention this entire time while I’ve just been blatantly staring down into her boobs.
What can I say? Delphi’s boobs are the type of boobs that can make a dragon think about life and things and stuff. Because the more you get lost in thought, the longer you can stare at her boobs for and then use the excuse, “Sorry, I got distracted thinking about something,” which is exactly what I just said to her.
“Master… if you want to stare… at my chest… you can do it without coming up with excuses,” Delphi replied.
“But it’s true. I usually do get lost in thought looking at your boobs. On purpose, but it still counts.”
Delphi let out a worried sigh and then poked Master’s—I mean, Drake’s cheek herself.
…
I wonder how he’d react if I called him “Master” like the doggo sisters do.
I… I kinda want to. But wait, it wouldn’t be the same if I just call him that out of nowhere. I want him to push me down against the bed and order me to call him that! Ah… that’d be the best. I wonder if I should start dropping hints about wanting him to completely dominate me…
Well, he basically just did dominate me, but only my soul. I—I want him to dominate my body, too! It doesn’t count if all he dominates is my soul!
But it was really hot, too. I had no idea that having my soul overwhelmed and put in its place like that could feel so good…
I—I have to stop thinking about it. Even the thought of it is almost enough to make me—
Stop it, Vala!
Think of the rating!
Bad dragon!
Heh.
Bad dragon.
I bet a lot of people will get that reference.
You filthy degenerates.
Huehehehehe.
But seriously I need to somehow get Drake to put a collar around my neck and dominate me while forcing me to call him Master. Sure, just being a responsible adult and talking to him about my interests and asking him to do that for me would be the most obvious thing to do, but that’s not the same! I want him to feel the need to do it to me all on his own!
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Maybe I should start acting bratty around him so he wants to put me in my place?
Ooh. That might work.
Wait!
Clawdia!
I’ll have Clawdia teach me! He carries her away and puts her in her place all the time! And we always hear her meowling and stuff the entire time!
Heh. It’s hot getting to listen to all of the, “Nyaaahn, Master!~” noises that come out from the house whenever he goes to “punish” her.
But I want that to be me sometimes, too!
Alright. Once Drake is back to being the narrator, I’ll begin my plan.
Operation: Tsundere Dragon Brat.
I’m going to be a bratty tsundere until he puts me in his place and—
“Vala…” Drake grumbled. “I… love you…”
HTERHTER AHHH MY HEART.
“Dr-Drake?” I asked. “Are you awake? Should—should we switch back to you narrating?”
He snored in response.
So… he just mumbled that… in his sleep.
Even in his dreams… he’s talking about loving me?
HBGTTWSEDHGB5TREWSHBNTRESDHBNTRESDFHBTRESDHBTREGSDHBTRESDFHBTRSEHTREDHTBREDHSBTERWDHBTREDHTBREH5BTREWHG543EWHBT54E3WHGBT5E4HBGT4EHB4EH4TEHG5RTW34EGHB5RT34WEHG5BWR4EHG45Q3YG44R3QWO9IEYGH45R3QWEYGO5R3IULWQEUHTYG4OLQ3WTGQ
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
HE’S TOO PERFECT.
I WANT TO DIE.
I WANT TO SPOIL AND PAMPER THE HECK OUT OF HIM.
HOW IS IT POSSIBLE FOR ONE MAN TO BE SO PERFECT? ISN’T THIS ILLEGAL? ISN’T HE TOO UNREALISTIC? HOW CAN ANYBODY TAKE OUR SERIES THIS SERIOUSLY WHEN THE MAIN HUSBANDO IS SO STUPIDLY UNREALISTICALLY PERFECT THAT NO MAN AS GOOD AS HIM COULD EVER EXIST? DOESN’T THAT BREAK IMMERSION?
CALM DOWN, VALA.
YOUR HEART ISN’T GOING TO BE ABLE TO HANDLE IT. IF IT BEATS ANY FASTER IT MIGHT SERIOUSLY BEAT OUT FROM YOUR CHEST.
BUT STILL.
HE LOVES ME.
HGBTRSWEDHGTRDHGRTSEDHSD
EVEN IN HIS DREAMS, HE STILL LOVES ME.
GHTRSEDHTRESDHTREWSDHTREWDSHTSEWDHTERSWDWHSD
AHHHHH IT’S NOT FAIR I WANT TO CALL HIM A GOOD BOY AND GIVE HIM A LAP PILLOW AND TELL HIM THAT HE’S THE BEST AND SPOIL HIM ROTTEN AND LET HIM ENJOY MY THIGHS MORE AND JUST—
I DON’T DESERVE HIM. HE’S TOO PRECIOUS FOR ME.
HECKING HECK IT’S NOT RIGHT JUST HOW PERFECT OF A MAN HE IS. IT’S NOT EVEN POSSIBLE FOR ME TO ENJOY ROMANCE MANGA AND ANIME ANYMORE BECAUSE I JUST WISH THAT EVERY PROTAGONIST WAS HIM INSTEAD.
AND THAT’S NOT EVEN GOING INTO HOW HOT HE IS.
DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HECKING HOT HE IS?
HOLY MOLY IT’S NOT RIGHT IT’S JUST NOT FAIR, I’M TELLING YOU. THIS MAN—HE LITERALLY HAS IT ALL. PERSONALITY, LOOKS, SOUL—
…
Drake is so getting an infinite amount of kisses later when he wakes up. I… I really need to do a better job of letting him know just how much I love and appreciate him. Especially after what we just did.
I guess that even I should start being a little more responsible now. After what just happened… it wouldn’t be right for me to keep up the stubborn act of a lazy girl who wants to do nothing but play video games all the time. The chain of events that are about to happen won’t let me act lazy.
But he did fall in love with the lazy me, so I still have to act lazy every now and then just for old time’s sake.
Not even Vivi had a solution to all of my problems back then, but Drake… he just took my problems and threw them in the trash bin.
I still don’t know how it’s possible, but man… I love him so much. So many years… so many years of guilt… so many years of feeling like garbage for running away from what everybody expects of me… and he makes me feel like it’s alright. No, he didn’t just make me feel like it’s alright, but he made it so that it’s actually alright.
For the first time in my entire life… I feel free.
I can really do anything I want now, and nobody can stop me.
Nobody can force me to go back to a life that I hated.
Even if they find me here, who cares?! They won’t be able to take me back anymore!
Take that, you stupid, narcissistic, arrogant, jerk parents!
We just told the oldest rules of reality to heck off!
And there’s nothing you can do about it!
“Master… you’re still staring at my boobs,” Delphi said.
“Oh, sorry, I got lost in thought again,” I replied. “Also, uhh, random question.”
“Is it soup related?”
“Nope.”
“Aww…”
“It’s uh… so, Drake is already perfect. He’s already the perfect boyfriend for all of us.”
Delphi’s tails twitched and her tail wagged. Ugh, she’s too cute. “Yep! He is!”
“So… I wanna be the same. I wanna be perfect for everybody, too. Is—is there anything I can do to be a better girlfriend for you? No matter what it is, tell me what it is and I’ll do my best!”
“Woah… Master is full of determination! I’ve never seen this look in your eyes before!”
“Heheh… well, I guess you could say a lot has happened, and it’s not fair to leave all the ‘being perfect’ duty up to Drake. I’ve got to carry my weight around here!”
Delphi looked really, really shocked that I was saying anything like that. I wasn’t sure if I should feel insulted or not, but it was alright since her shocked face was seriously cute.
“But Master is already perfect,” Delphi said. “Both Masters are perfect!”
“Nahhh, I’m not perfect. But I will be! I’m going to get up to perfect waifu level.”
“But there’s nothing I would change about you. Master is already perfect exactly as she is! I love Master! Both Masters! And everybody else, too!”
Hmm. Asking Delphi might have been a bad idea since she’s too blinded by her own perfection to realize that I wasn’t perfect.
But I had an idea.
“What if I start learning how to make super good soup?” I asked. “Or even… what if I learned to make souper soup?”
Delphi looked even more shocked, taking a step back as her ears and tail stood straight up. “The—the legendary souper soup?! But—but that’s only a legend! Nobody believes the rumors about it are true!”
“Then I’ll grab onto your hopes and dreams and make them reality! I’ll prove that souper soup is true and serve it personally to you!” I think Drake would say something that cool, anyways. Well, maybe not in that exact way, but he would totally declare that he would do something like that for any of us. Ugh… I just want to spend an entire volume fangirling about how perfect he is.
But back to Delphi, she looked like she was about to cry. “Are—are you really going to make me souper soup?!”
Oh, I guess we’re not italicizing the pun part of the name anymore. “Yep! I promise. With my own two hands, I’m going to make the legendary souper soup, and you’ll be the first one to taste it!”
“Ma-Master!” Delphi cried out, pouncing onto me which caused me to fell backward. She knocked me over, landed on top of me, and then Drake fell on top of her, creating a Delphi sandwich with our bodies.
Her chest was right against my crotch.
I really, really wished I was a guy for that.
“What’s… this soft thing under my face?” Drake asked.
Wait.
Drake?
Drake asked?
He woke up!
And when I looked at where his face was… it was planted against Delphi’s butt.
Nice.
Okay. Now that Drake is conscious, he can go back to being narrator, and then we can finally return to Valkyria and the old ladies while completely ignoring everything that happened in the forest for now.
As for Operation: Bratty Dragon Tsundere… or was it the other way around? Well, whatever it was, that can be put on hold indefinitely. Drake… deserves me to be honest with my feelings and wants instead of playing games with him to get him to act in a way that I want him to.
All this time spent together with me playing games… and not video games, but relationship games, when I could have just been more honest the entire time about my wants and could have been enjoying it all this time… I’m so stupid.
It’s time to grow up, Vala.
You acted like a lazy little kid for long enough.
You’re still allowed to sleep in and play video games, but you have to start being responsible from now on!
And… as Drake just proved in the forest… it’s time to follow my heart and do what I believe is for the best no matter just how impossible it might seem.
“My hips hurt,” Drake grumbled.
Heh. I bet they do after how rough he was.
AND EVEN JUST HIS VOICE—HGTBSRDHGD GHTRWESDHGTREWSDH TSEH
HOW?
HOW IS JUST HEARING HIS VOICE ENOUGH TO MAKE MY HEART FEEL THIS WAY?
I’M SERIOUSLY GOING TO EXPLODE IF I DON’T END THE CHAPTER RIGHT NOW.
BEST. HECKING. HUSBANDO. EVER.
BHHE
THAT’S THE NEW ACRONYM FOR DRAKE.
BHHE
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