《Lazy Dragon Queen: Gaming in an Illogical World》[Vol. 4 pt. 8]
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“I know the plan was originally to take you to a different place, but I thought that would be even better,” I said as both Windows and I walked out of the aquarium.
They shook their heads together and said, “That was way better! But… I do still want to go see the world’s biggest zoo sometime.”
“That just means we’re going to have to go on another date, right?”
Window blushed a little and nodded.
Originally, our date plan was to take her to the world’s largest zoo and aquarium. She thought that the world’s largest aquarium was attached to the world’s largest zoo. In all of her time on the internet, she managed to miss that the world’s largest aquarium was actually a standalone structure and the one that we just got finished exploring.
With how long we spent in the aquarium, we were already about halfway through the day and the city was even busier than it was before. That led us to exploring some small, local places we found along the busy streets. We grabbed some more food even though we already had some at the aquarium’s restaurant, we visited some little souvenir shops to buy various reminders of our date, and we took an elevator up to the top of one of the city’s tallest buildings so that we could enjoy the sights as the sun finally went down in the distance.
And I even remembered to actually pay for everything, too.
Also, I had to admit that it was pretty nice to watch the sunset together with two girls clinging to my arms with their chests pushing up against them. There were a few other guys on date with their girlfriends at the top of the building, but the guys all seemed too busy staring at me out of jealousy to notice the annoyed glares of their girlfriends.
Once it was night, there was still no portal from Vala to bring us home, and that made me remember something else.
She was going to ban me from hugging for five seconds if I didn’t make it to second base with Window.
She wouldn’t wait until I do that to give us our return portal, would she? I thought to myself. The more I thought about it, the more it sounded like something Vala would do. She might have been a lazy dragon who just wanted to play video games all day, but she was also a pervert with the dirty mind of an old man.
That just went to show her true age.
“Window, I think that uh, she’s not going to let us go home until we do that one thing she told us to do,” I said.
Window blushed and looked away with both heads. “I – I already figured that out. It’s like those fan comics people make of their favorite ships where two characters are locked in a room and they’re not allowed out until they… d-do lewd things.”
“If you don’t… want to do anything like that, we can probably just rent a room and wait until tomorrow morning. I doubt that she’d actually force us to do anything to—”
“I-it’s not like I’m being forced! That… tha-that makes it sound like I don’t want to…”
“So… you do want to do things?”
“Read the mood! I gave myself this top tier waifu body and have been pushing my chest against you all day!”
“Can’t you just tell me a simple yes or no?!”
“If you can’t read the mood with me then you’re doomed against Clawdia since she’s way more tsun!”
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“At least I can drug her with catnip to get the truth out of her!”
“You can’t rely on drugging people to find out if they want to do lewd things or not!”
Once again, we ended up having a pretty outrageous conversation while in an area full of other people staring at us wondering whether they should call the police or not.
I lowered my voice and said, “Fine, we’re going to order a room and do exactly what Vala expects us to do.”
“Hmph, fine,” Window replied.
“That’s not a no.”
“It obviously isn’t!”
And so, we went and rented a hotel room.
“Di-didn’t the scene transition way too fast?” Window asked as we stood before our rented bed.
“I was so distracted thinking about this that I don’t even remember the walk over here or paying for the room,” I answered.
“Sa-same. The power of distractions is scary… it’s powerful enough to wipe memories.”
“I think it’s less that distractions are powerful and more that we’re just stupid.”
“Hey, don’t lump me in with you. You’re stupid, yes, but I’m an informational status waifu! It’s in my job description that I’m the exact opposite of stupid!”
“Your job description must be using a custom dictionary then.”
“Keep it up and I’ll change my mind about letting you touch me.”
“Don’t act like you’re the only one being touched here. It’s not fair unless you touch me, too.”
“Tha-that was never part of the deal! I’m an informational status waifu! Not a lewd touching waifu!”
It was time to test out my latest trick. “Fine. You don’t have to touch me if you don’t want to.”
“I didn’t say I don’t want to!”
My trick worked. Window might have been too nervous to outright admit wanting to do anything, but she was still able to deny not wanting to do things. With a bit of refining the technique, it might even prove effective against Clawdia. “Neither of us have to do anything to each other if you don’t want to.”
“Tha-that’s the opposite of what I want! Wait… you’re totally tricking me into being honest with my feelings right now, aren’t you?”
“What? I’d never do that.”
“Just like you’d never cheat using a tank in the final battle against the cats?”
“Exactly.”
“I should hit you.”
“That’s Clawdia’s thing.”
“We’re not even in the same universe right now, so it’s okay if I steal her character traits.”
“Or we could both just be honest about what we want to do since we’re consenting adults who clearly want to do things together.”
“Wh-where did that confidence come from all of a sudden?”
“You should know by now that I try not to let gags run on for too long.”
Both copies of Window sat down on the edge of the bed and looked up at me. “Fine. I… I’ll stop being dumb about this. But my heart isn’t ready for anything more than touching! So… do-don’t get your hopes up that we’re going to do anything else.”
“I won’t. First, which of you is the original Window?”
The Window sitting on the right side held up her hand. “Why?”
“Because it’s only fair that I do this with the original first.”
Having already done things with Vala and Cami made adult things easier, but I still felt a bit nervous around Window. Maybe it was because, in a way, she was more like a friend to me than they were. Vala and Cami were very clearly in girlfriend territory whereas Window was more like in best friend territory. Or rather, Vala and Cami were girlfriends first and friends second. Window was my friend first and girlfriend second. Of course, I liked them all equally. It wasn’t like I was any less romantically interested in Window. It was just that, in a way, I was afraid of messing things up with her in the way that somebody would normally be when trying to take things to the next step with their best friend.
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But even so, I held onto the original Window and kissed her. It was our first real kiss and, once our lips were actually connected, all of my stupid worries were washed away. Her act of playing hard to get vanished in an instant as she leaned into the kiss, wrapping her arms around my neck in return to keep me in place so that the connection of our lips wouldn’t break any time soon.
The kissing only ended so that Window could pull her head back with burning cheeks to look into my eyes and say, “I… I love you, Drake. A-and I’m sorry for being so stubborn. It’s still… really hard to be honest, even now.” She sounded completely different to how she sounded just minutes prior. That was the power of kissing.
I pushed the hair away from her forehead and placed a kiss against the new clearing. “You wouldn’t be Window if you weren’t being stubborn and complicating things.”
“You – you’re supposed to say you love me back! At least tell me that much if you’re going to call me out!”
“I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t tease you first, right?”
“I – I guess that’s true… now… ca-can you say it, please?”
Her eyes were full of eager anticipation as she struggled to look at me. “I love you too, Window,” I said before returning my lips to her own that were curled into a wide smile.
We might not have gotten to any touching yet, but that was perfectly fine. Simply kissing on the bed was more than enough for us. Even if that was all we did for the night, it would have been enough to satisfy both of us. Neither of us wanted anything more in the moment than to enjoy each other’s embrace as we allowed our true feelings for each other to come out without calling me the worst and without me threatening to throw her.
But the night was young and we underestimated ourselves. We really, really underestimated ourselves.
We never stopped at second base.
The night started pretty slowly with what felt like an hour of kissing and cuddling on the bed. However, as soon as we finally decided to go to the next base – well, the gas pedal broke got stuck while pressed down and we were quick to make up for all the time spent bullying each other instead of doing lewder things to each other. And since there were two of her and only one of me, I ended up doing twice the usual amount of work even if was unnecessary since both of her bodies shared… sensations.
Needless to say, I felt like I was drained by a succubus as far as my energy and body went. That was the kind of night I could only manage to do maybe once a year.
And when I remembered that I had multiple girlfriends and that I was almost definitely going to end up in similar situations with all of them, I realized that I was going to need to start exercising more to get into even better shape. Otherwise, I would never be able to keep up with all of them.
To make matters even worse for my body, the next morning, Window must have felt pretty energetic since I woke up to the sensation of her bouncing on top of my abdomen while her hands shook my shoulders. I didn’t know how she could be so full of energy despite the… activities that lasted deep into the night with both of her bodies.
“—a!”
I was seriously exhausted still. I couldn’t even bring myself to open my eyes or to listen to whatever she was saying properly.
“Pa—…—ke up!”
“Relax,” I grumbled. “Give me five more minutes at least.”
“—iiiine.”
Thankfully, despite how much energy Window had, she was willing to let me get five more minutes of sleep.
But only five more minutes.
Obviously, anybody who asks for five more minutes really means that they want about five more hours. That’s one of the rules of the universe. Whatever number of minutes somebody asks to keep sleeping for, you’re supposed to multiply that by sixty.
But Window came back exactly five minutes later.
“Ti—…—et up! Pa—”
I somehow felt even more tired after those extra five minutes, but I also felt annoyed enough to finally open my eyes to see what she wanted.
My head was still on its side when I opened my eyes. The first sight I saw was… a snoring Window with drool hanging from the corner of her lips as she snored right into my face.
That confused me. Was I still half asleep? Was I imagining things? Window’s other body disappeared before we went to sleep because she ran out of energy to keep it going thanks to everything we did during the night.
Did she create another double in her sleep?
No, wait, I thought.
The voice that came from over me sounded… younger than Window. Younger and way more girly.
I felt far more awake all of a sudden.
I fully opened my eyes and turned my head to look at whoever was on top of me.
That was when I saw her and finally understood what she was calling me the entire time.
“Papa!” said the small girl with pink hair that featured black streaks running through it. “Ehehe!” She looked like a little girl probably around the age of ten or so. She also had on a plain, white dress that looked pretty… rectangular. I never saw a dress that looked as blocky as hers did. I then got a closer look at her face as she leaned down against me, placing her chin right against the top of my chest as she stared into my eyes. Her eyes were wide and full of both innocence and joy.
“He-hey, Window,” I said, grabbing onto the first part of Window I could find and shaking her.
That may or may not have been her chest.
“H-huuh?” Window asked, grumbling as she slowly opened her eyes. “Wh-where do you think you’re touching this early? Just because I let you… touch them last night doesn’t mean you’re still allow—” She went silent once she saw who was on top of me.
The girl noticed Window looking at her and smiled wide before jumping bodies from mine to Window’s. “Mama!” she shouted, wrapping her arms around Window’s neck and nuzzling the side of her face against Window’s.
I started to get out of bed only to remember that we’d need to send whoever this small girl was out of the room while me and Window put some clothes on. For the moment, I kept myself covered up with the blanket while sitting up in bed. “Window… what’s this thing?” Calling the girl a thing probably wasn’t the right thing to say, but I never was good with kids.
And the girl didn’t approve either as she looked at me to say, “I’m not a thing! I’m an informational status… umm… daughter? Yeah! An informational status daughter!”
“Dr-Drake,” Window said, looking straight at me. “What did you do to me in my sleep?”
I wanted to shout, “I didn’t do anything!” but I didn’t want to raise my voice around the girl. I might not have known how to react around kids despite always wanting a bunch of them, but I did know better than to shout in front of them. So, instead, I tried to keep a calm voice as I said, “I didn’t do anything, so don’t blame this on me.”
As for the girl, she giggled at our confusion and said, “It was both of you!”
“What do you mean?”
“Mama really, really, really wanted a kid with Papa, so she made me! But she wouldn’t have been able to without Papa!”
Window’s eyes widened a bit more as she came to a realization. “Drake… I – I think… when umm… you… had your… y-you know… D-DNA in me… while I was asleep… I… um… dr-dreamed of… u-us having a kid… a-and… my body must have… com-combined our uh… y-you know, and uh… ma-made her in my sleep… it’s the only… the only e-explanation I can think of.”
“You mean this little girl isn’t just delusional and in the wrong room?” I asked.
“Hmph! I’m not de-loo-shin-al!” the girl said with a pout. “Don’t make me throw you, Papa!”
And now it was time for my realization. For this girl to threaten to throw me… she really did have my blood in her. I also already felt like a proud father which was something I really didn’t expect to start my morning with.
“Window,” I said, looking straight at her.
“Dr-Drake,” Window said, looking straight at me.
We nodded in unison before looking at the girl still on top of her.
There was no denying it.
This girl was our daughter.
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