《Core .001》Volume 03: The price that is my heart and soul (2)

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When I woke up the next morning, I had a killer headache and emptiness still swallowed up my heart... As much as I wanted to deny the reality that had transpired, I was completely helpless as the images of Jennifer's final moments kept flashing in my head... I tried to brush them aside but to no avail... before I knew it, tears were already plastered all over my face...

"Jennifer...*sniff*" I muttered in grief...

Taking a short glance forward... I found myself in an unfamiliar place... and yet, I had no motivation to get up from my bed nor the slightest care to even look where the hell I was... there was only one thing on my mind...

"Are you alright?" came Harold's voice from the side.

"Do I look alright?" I grouchily replied.

"*sigh*, I'm sorry about what happened back there... I know Ariel can go a little overboard sometimes..." Harold apologized.

"A little?!" I criticized.

"... Well uhm... Anyways, I have something important to ask of you... In our last mission, you didn't know how to use [Enforce Weapon] right?... Could it also be that you don't know how to sealing off your heart while smithing?" Harold inquired.

Sealing off my heart?

"How the hell could I know?! *sniff* Nobody ever wants to tell me anything! You all just call me a retard and say it's all common sense and don't freaking tell me anything at all! *sniff* I HATE YOU ALL! GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME ALONE!" I exploded due to my sore spot being provoked.

Whether he actually deserves my outburst or not, I don't even know, neither do I even care... I just want to be left alone...*sniff*

"*sigh*... I understand... let me just quickly fill you in on the situation and then I'll leave..." Harold calmly replied, seeing I wasn't responding back to him, he continued on "I'm not exactly a smith so I can't provide you all the details, but to give you a basic summary: When you start learning a profession, the first thing you learn about is how to seal off your heart. This is important because your will is tied down to your class of choice. The more heart you put into something, the more experience you will gain from it, but in retrospect, if something goes wrong you will also feel more recoil from it as well. So the most important thing you should know about is how to seal off your heart. When doing so, the experience you gain will decrease, and the quality of items you produce will most likely drop as well... but at the very least you won't suffer the recoil. Only when you find someone you consider trustworthy should you even consider putting your heart into it. Because if you are not careful, it can have devastating consequences...

So anyways here is the plan going forward... We are currently in located in Garton Village... And after consulting with the party, we have decided to stay at the house of the local blacksmith. Right now, he stepped out with Saron and Brian to go to the local copper mine for some supplies. But when he gets back, we hired him to teach you about [Enforce Weapon] and about how to seal off your heart while smithing. Unfortunately we are short on time, but if we speed up our schedule, we can probably stay here for about a day..." Harold informed.

"Are you done?!" I complained, as I simply wasn't in a mood for anything at the moment...

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"... I guess that's all for now... If you end up feeling better, you can go to the smithing workshop via that door in the back. Feel free to practice sealing off your heart over there and don't worry, we'll cover all expenses... If there is nothing else, I'll be off now..." Harold said as he bid his farewell and left the room.

Seeing him go, I didn't say a thing as I lay their motionless...

After grieving for who knows how long, I finally decided to get off the bed... *sigh*... as much as it pains me, I need to learn how to seal off my heart ASAP... that monster doesn't deserve even a fraction of it!...

I walked into the back of the room and opened the door... behind it was a small workshop. After taking a moment to familiarize myself with it, I took out the sword I didn't finish from my [Item Box] and prepared to work...

Taking a swing of my hammer, I was stunned as the new class skill I recently got from reaching level 10 activated... I originally thought it would be a skill similar to [Blacksmithing: Enhanced Smithing], but this odd skill was nothing of the sort...

[CP][Creationist: Creation Correction] Level N/A

You are now able to partly peak into the path of creation.

When using production skills, you have a 10% + 1% for every level in your non-combat class + 0.5% for every point of [PER] chance to see your error and correct it

Weird right? And even more weird is that this skill activated on my first swing! Is this skill saying even my first swing is somehow wrong?! How rude!

Well... let's not jump to any conclusions and see... and after watching the skill in action... I was even more dumbfounded and confused... because the illusion shown to me before rewinding me back in time was utterly ridiculous...

I mean seriously... Is this skill some kind of joke? Cause I'm in no mood for jokes! Ignoring the nonsensical error I was shown, I swung my hammer down onto the sword!

*ding*

"Ha? How could this be possible?" I muttered in confusion...

No, no, this simply can't be... I must have gotten dizzy from the skill totally confusing me! Right! I swing my hammer yet again!

*ding* *ding* *ding*

"Why can't I freaking hit the sword!" I screamed out in frustration!

No matter how hard I tried, no matter what angle I swung it, I kept on missing! Feeling completely at a loss, I activated [All-Observing-Eyes] and swung down the hammer!

Paying close attention to my swing, I made sure it stayed on course... but a centimeter before my hammer landed on the sword, my hand suddenly stopped and began to tremble... I tried to push it forward with all my strength, but it simply wouldn't budge... and with it, a huge pain filled my heart as tears began to trickle down my face yet again...

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!" I yelled as I dropped the hammer and grasped my head!

Dropping to my knees, I began to mess up my hair as I felt my entire being in total disarray!

"What happened?!?!" Harold inquired as he ran in worried.

"I-I can't smith! I don't know why, but I can't! Every time I try to... t-the images of Jennifer being destroyed keeps on replaying in my head... and no matter how hard I try to push that memory away, it just won't stop!" I wept in total loss...

"Wait... don't tell me... When you say 'Jennifer', is that a pet name or an actual named weapon?" Harold inquired.

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"*sniff* Named weapon... and a beautiful one at that...*sniff*... why?" I muttered in tears.

"Shit!" Harold yelled out as he slapped his face.

"W-What does that mean? What's wrong with me?" I desperately begged for an answer while pulling on the hem of his clothes.

It felt as though my whole meaning was slipping away from me...

"I can't be sure just yet... but what is it that you tried to smith just now?" Harold queried.

"A sword?*sniff*" I responded in confusion.

"Have you tried to smith something else?" Harold questioned.

"N-Not yet..." I replied.

"Alright then, try to make a few other things and see how it goes... based on that, we'll be able to judge better" Harold suggested.

Prompted by that slim ray of hope, I decided to try smithing things other than swords... since I was smithing anyways, I decided to start with a better belt to help improve my stats. Since I had 28 [Coal Ores] left, I should be able to make a bunch of things, albeit not holy-steel.

And after spending a few hours smithing... I was able to make the following...

Adjustable Steel Belt of Agile Strength

An average belt made out of steel that can be adjusted to fit most waists

+10 STR +10 AGI +100 DEF

Bonus: +1 STR

Restrictions:

Minimum Level:

Level 20 – Benefit: +1 STR +1 AGI | Penalty: 90% reduction in stats

[Made by Shiro]

Durability: 500/500

Quality 5.8021/10.00

Steel Shield of Greater Vitality

An average shield made out of steel

+20 VIT +200 DEF

Restrictions:

Minimum Level:

Level 20 – Benefit: +2 VIT | Penalty: 90% reduction in stats

[Made by Shiro]

Durability: 1000/1000

Quality 5.0010/10.00

Steel Mace of Vital Strength

A below average mace made out of steel

+9 STR +9 VIT +94 ATK

Restrictions:

Minimum Level:

Level 20 – Benefit: +1 STR +1 VIT | Penalty: 90% reduction in stats

[Made by Shiro]

Durability: 944/944

Quality 4.7182/10.00

Steel Spear of Agile Strength

A below average spear made out of steel

+8 STR +8 AGI +80 ATK

Restrictions:

Minimum Level:

Level 20 – Benefit: +1 STR +1 AGI | Penalty: 90% reduction in stats

[Made by Shiro]

Durability: 800/800

Quality 4.0013/10.00

The results were just horrible!... even with the new skill that helped assist me, my ability to smith has pretty much gone down the drain... I also attempted to make a dagger, but it turned out into a complete flop just like the sword...

But worst of all... MY JOY WAS GONE! I felt nothing... no warmth... no happiness... if anything, I felt sadness... for the first time... smithing hurt...*sniff*

Feeling my hopes and dreams crushed... I again burst out in tears of misery...

...

After I finally calmed down to some extent, the party sans Saron and Brian met in the living room...

"The situation is really bad, apparently what Ariel destroyed was a named weapon. So as it stands, Shiro is not able to produce any more swords... For the time being, it's probably better to confiscate the swords Ariel has just in case" Harold announced.

"Eh? I don't want to!" Ariel dejectedly complained.

"Look here Ariel, this is serious. If worse comes to worse, Shiro may never be able to smith again!" Harold cautioned.

"But I like Mayo's swords, they explode extremely well!" Ariel adamantly protested.

Grrrr... This is why I hate those darn heroes! All they freaking care about is themselves and no one else! They use their comrades as merely convenient stepping stones for their own agenda while only pretending to care!

"Give them back!" I declared, not willing to hold it in any longer!

"But Mayo... didn't you say that my unique skill was cool?" Ariel defended.

"It isn't cool at all! It's the worst skill ever! THE WORST!" I venomously objected!

"Mayo... I know that's not how you feel..." Ariel appealed.

That's it... enough of this bullshit!

"You want to know how I really feel?!?! Fine! I think you'd do this whole world a HUGE favor if you go die in a dungeon somewhere and leave us in peace! You heroes are a plague to this world! THAT'S HOW I FEEL! DIE! DIE! DIE!" I screamed in hatred and disgust.

Not willing to tolerate her presence any longer, I ran back to the smithing workshop and slammed the door shut! Then leaning back on the door, I slid down to the floor and hugged my knees... DAMN YOU WRETCHED HERO! First you take away my freedom, and now you take away my only joy in this whole wide world!... How much more will you take away from me until you are finally fully satisfied?!? *sniff*

DAMN IT! DAMN IT! DAMN IT! I tried really hard... I really did... but no matter where I go, no matter what I do... things just keep on being taken away from me and I'm completely powerless to stop it... I freaking hate this darn world!...*sniff*... mommy... daddy... I want to go back home... I really miss you...*sniff*

And just like that... I cried myself back to sleep...

...

* knock * * knock *

"Mmmmm..." I mumbled as I slowly opened my eyes.

"You there?" Harold asked from the other side of the door.

"No..." I responded due to my bad mood.

"I'm coming in for a second" Harold announced.

"Eh?!" I freaked out in surprise as the door behind me opened, forcing me to tumble down backwards due to loss of support.

"Don't do that so suddenly!" I complained.

"Sorry about that... I just came to deliver the [Copper Ore] that Saron and Brian brought back... While I am at it, might as well relay a few things..." Harold spoke as he placed a large bundle of [Copper Ore] in the workshop from his [Item Box].

Your skill [NA][Item Box] has become Level 5

"...First of all, since the Blacksmith is back, he is ready to teach you whenever you are ready... just remember, you only have until tomorrow, so I suggest starting as soon as possible. I also had a discussion with the rest of the party and we decided that after we are done with the capital, we'll head over to Shargon Kingdom aka the homeland of the Dwarves. If there is anyone that can help with your condition, that would be the place to look. Either way, we need to stock up on swords anyways considering Ariel isn't exactly well like by blacksmiths around these parts..." Harold informed.

Geee... I wonder why?

"Can't I just go back to Hallion? Maybe Grandmaster Clauson knows what to do..." I suggested.

"*sigh* I wish we could do that... but unfortunately we are already behind schedule... plus, there are some other factors at play..." Harold hesitated.

"Such as...?" I pressed on, somewhat not convinced.

"Well... it's kind of hard to explain..." Harold averted.

"If you want I can tell you~" Tina interrupted as she made her way into the workshop.

Harold gave Tina a reprimanding glare but she completely ignored it and walked up to me.... Bending down, she then whispered into my ear...

"You see... let us just say hypothetically that after begging, you finally got on a rare new toy from someone who you haven't been on good terms with lately..." Tina suggested.

"Aha..." I responded, not sure where this was going...

"Tina!" Harold called out in annoyance.

"...Then after you broke said toy, you show back up the next day, demanding to get it fixed" Tina explained while completely ignoring Harold.

My eyes went wide with realization... Instantly, I shot a hostile glare at Harold! Grrrrr! Why are all the adults around me always so freaking irresponsible!?!?!

"What did you tell her Tina?!" Harold ordered in a serious tone.

"Nothing, only the truth~" Tina playfully shrugged and walked out of the workshop while waving her fingers with a satisfied smile.

"Tina! Damn that bitch... Shiro, what did she tell you?" Harold inquired.

"She told me you are an irresponsible jerk! Hmph!" I pouted.

"Look... I don't know what she told you, but you can't take that witch seriously. She-" Harold tried to explain.

At that moment, a tall man in his mid 50s walked in... by the looks of his appearance and by the reading show by my [Identify] skill, he was most definitely the local blacksmith.

"Uhm... Seems like I came in at a bad time... if you are busy now... I can come back later..." announced the blacksmith.

"No, perfect time! This irresponsible jerk here was just leaving!" I replied and gave Harold a harsh side glare!

"Now wait a minute here..." Harold protested.

"You are the one who said I had limited time here to learn... or are you going to take this away from me too?!" I retorted while doubling down on my glare.

"That is..." Harold hesitated.

"Well are you?!" I pressed.

Feeling cornered, Harold let out a deep sigh...

"Alright, have it your way... We'll talk about this tomorrow..." Harold relented and walked out.

After glaring at Harold all the way out the door, I then turned to the smith.

"Lets get this over with..." I declared.

"Right... okay then... so lets first start with [Enforce Weapon] and [Enforce Armor]... These skills are what we call hidden skills. Though despite that name, they are actually pretty easy to get. All you really need to do is have [Blacksmithing] to at least level 1 and repair 100 weapons and 100 armors..." the man explained.

"Show me the skills" I abruptly replied.

"As I said, it isn't a skill you can just learn normally..." the blacksmith rebuked.

"Show me" I insisted.

"Alright, alright, If that is what it takes for us to continue..." the blacksmith replied, somewhat unsure of my reasoning...

You have acquired a new sub-skill [NA][Enforce Weapon] N/A

[NA][Enforce Weapon] Level N/A

Temporarily reduce durability loss of weapons by 25% + 5% for every [Blacksmithing] level and improve ATK by 10% + 2% for every [Blacksmithing] level for 4 hours

I would normally be thrilled about that awesome skill... but somehow... I'm just not in the mood for anything... worst of all, I now have to put on an act for the next 5 minutes to get that other skill as well... *sigh*

"Was that good enough? If so let us proceed..." the blacksmith responded and took out a few broken blades for us to work on.

I took the first blade and began repairing it... and after 5 minutes passed, I stopped and looked back at the man.

"Done, now show me [Enforce Armor]" I declared.

"But you only repaired one weapon..." the blacksmith replied with a perplexed expression on his face.

"What do you know? I guess I repaired 99 weapons prior... If you don't believe me here let me show you..." I replied, then demonstrated the skill in question.

"Well I guess that makes sense... then let us proceed to armors..." the blacksmith accepted, and took out a damaged armor.

"Show me" I repeated.

"Again?... *sigh* Alright...." the blacksmith relented.

You have acquired a new sub-skill [NA][Enforce Armor] N/A

[NA][Enforce Armor] Level N/A

Temporarily reduce durability loss of armor and shields by 25% + 5% for every [Blacksmithing] level and improve DEF by 10% + 2% for every [Blacksmithing] level for 4 hours

"Hmmm... I guess I already had that one" I announced, not wanting to continue this farce any longer.

To make sure there is no doubt, I showed of the skill in question.

"..."

I know I was being a bit obvious to some extent... but at this point I just didn't care... not to mention these skills are low level skills anyways and this is only a local village blacksmith... while I don't exactly want to set of any flags, it should be fine... it's not like what I showed was impossible by any means... odd sure, impossible? Hardly...

"Right then... If that's all out of the way, the last thing is to learn to isolate your heart. When you smith an item, I know it's easy to get excited about it and want to give it your all to make it as good as possible. But in doing so, you create a deep connection between yourself and the item you are making. The more the item means to you, the deeper the connection. It is through this connection though that you gain experience. The larger the connection, the more experience you will gain, but in return, if something goes wrong, you will feel a larger feedback as well.

In some cases, it can even cause trauma or worse, you may forever lose your ability to smith. Which is why it is imperative that you separate your heart from the making process. Only when you are absolutely positive the person you plan to give said item is worthy to wield it should you place your heart in it. One can say it's like entrusting your future as a blacksmith to that person.

Now then... to separate your heart from the item, you need to look at the item as nothing more than just another tool, nothing more, nothing less. So when smithing, remove all attachment from the item, in this way, your item will have only the bare minimum connection to your existence" the blacksmith explained.

I took a side glance at the steel items I recently made and then looked back...

"My stuff don't have any heart... at least not anymore..." I replied while dropping down my ears in sadness...

"... Is that so... well I guess that would be all, if you need anything, feel free to call me... Oh right! You can use the [Copper Ore] over there to practice with, it belongs to your party anyways so no need to hesitate" the blacksmith informed with an awkward expression and prepared to leave.

Thinking about it for a short bit... something I wanted to ask came to mind...

"There is something... are there anymore hidden skills out there?" I queried.

If there are more, it's best to get them all out of the way now rather than finding out I'm missing something else later on.

"There are... plenty for that matter... But I'm not exactly privy to all of them since many of them have nothing to do with [Blacksmithing]. In all honesty, I wouldn't even be surprised if there were some for [Blacksmithing] as well that I don't know about since well... I'm just a local smith after all" the blacksmith informed.

"Then are there any other hidden [Blacksmithing] skills that you do know?" I curiously inquired.

"Hmm... well as far as [Blacksmithing] goes, there is [Smithing Adhesion] which allows you to merge multiple production skills into one item. Such as say... making an iron armor with tier 3 leather padding while only having level 1 [Leatherworking]. That is of course assuming you have high enough [PER]. As for the conditions for that skill... you need to get your [Blacksmith] class to atleast level 20, learn one other production skill and combine 50 items" the blacksmith answered.

Looking at the blacksmith's level, it was 29 so he should already have that skill right?

"Can you show me the skill?" I questioned.

"Uhm... I guess... but I would have to first procure some leather... though... that would require an additional fee..." the blacksmith hesitantly informed while rubbing the back of his head.

"The party will pay for it, and if you can, grab as much leather as possible..." I requested.

At least they better pay for it!... after what they've done to me, something like this should be a given, no?

"Alright... I'll be right back then..." the blacksmith awkwardly smiled and walked out of the shop.

As I saw him leave, I began pondering on what I should do next... because from yesterday's incident, I finally realized how naive I have been... I thought that if I just sit there and let the hero and her party members give me EXP, I'd be golden, but now I realize that's not enough! I hate being so weak and powerless! It's really darn frustrating!.... I have to be proactive in doing whatever it takes to get stronger... at the very least, I need to get my combat class and raise my base combat stats above 100. That power I felt when my AGI went over 100 was out of this world!... it was as though I was completely reborn... If I could get my combat stats to level 100, I'm sure I could beat that [Wraith] with ease! Maybe even face off a Lycanthrope...

Anyways... the question comes down to this... what do I need to do right now to accomplish my goal as quickly as possible?... thinking about it, that would probably be the [Armor Creation] class quest. Initially, I wasn't too concerned about it since I was lacking in INT and WIS anyways, so I couldn't really take full advantage of having such high PER. There were the small improvements I got from class skills, but a few points in PER wouldn't have been enough to break through to making quality 7 Holy steel anyways, so I was effectively in no hurry... I just figured if I'm going to be doing [Tailoring] and [Leatherworking] anyways, why waste time on it? But now, everything has changed, and I can't afford to be so laid back anymore... I need to at the very least restore my ability to make Holy-Steel with a quality score of 5... For that, every point counts!

I have a few other ideas as well, but first things first...

With that in mind, I took out the [Copper Ore] from its wooden crate and began smelting it...

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