Emily walked into the armory and up to the desk. The armory sergeant was sitting behind the desk typing on the computer. “Hey Never!” He said when he looked up. He sounded cheerful.

“Hey, Sarge,” Emily said trying to sound cheerful. It fell flat even to her ears.

“Please tell me you didn’t lose another rifle.” He asked her frowning.

“Sorry, Sarge its somewhere under a few tons of rock,” Emily said sadly.

“Dammit Never someone is going to put you on report if you keep losing rifles like this.” The armory sergeant said looking concerned.

“They already have Sarge,” Emily said sadly.

“For the rifle? If it’s as you say it is then there is no way anyone would put you up on report for that.” The Sergeant said concerned.

“No. It's for not sleeping while on patrol and insubordination.” Emily said.

“Ok, you're going to have to explain this one to me. I am not quite understanding what you're saying.” The Sergeant said standing up and sitting on the side of the desk.

Emily explained everything that happened while she was deployed. She ended her story with her shaking the Captain's hand.

“What. A. Dick.” The Sergeant said shaking his head. “Ok, you know the drill let me fill out the requisition forms and I’ll get you a new rifle.”

Emily sat down on one of the chairs near the desk and waited. According to the Sergeant M9’s were closely controlled so there was extra paperwork involved. Emily sighed and leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes. She absently scratched the back of her head. For some reason whenever she came here, whether to clean her rifle or to requisition a new one, her head always itched. Must be the something in the air. She looked over at the Sergeant and smiled. Some things never changed. He was the worst typer in the world. He sucked at typing. He was a one finger typer and then stares at the screen glassy-eyed like he was always lost.. She got a mental pitcher of him trying to send a text message and smiled. She always felt better when she came here even if he always grumpy every time she lost her rifles.

“Hey Never. Never, I am done.” The Armory Sergeant said waking her up.

“Oh crap sorry Sarge,” Emily said jerking awake.

“It’s ok I’ve ordered you a new rifle. Should be in tomorrow. I just need you to fill out some paperwork before you head out.”

“Of course Sarge,” Emily said standing up and trying to brush out the wrinkles in her uniform.

“How about you head back to the barracks and get some sleep and later tonight fill it out online. Sound fair?”

Emily blinked surprised. “Sounds fair sarge.” She said nodding. “Thanks.” He normally had her fill out her report on paper. It was the first time he ever let her fill it out online.

Once outside the armory, her depression came crashing down again. Her smile disappeared. Tiredly she headed to the barracks. She felt so tired. She embarrassed herself when they headed home from K-G pass last night. She had fallen asleep in the back of the truck and she woke up screaming in front of everyone. “Stupid nightmares.”

Arriving back at the base hit her emotionally. For a few seconds when she arrived back on base she had forgotten Wonder was dead and rotting in a coffin back home. She had looked around for her smiling face before it all came crashing down. What kind of friend forgets their best friend had died. Jan wasn’t there either but then who could blame her. Her best friend had died.

Arriving at the barracks a corporal stopped her. “Never what are you doing. Don’t you know you are confined to the barracks until you meet with the Old Man.”

“Oh no sorry. I was just coming back from the armory. Lost my rifle under a mountain.” Emily said embarrassed.

“Ok that’s fine but if you do go out you need to get permission and your only allowed to go out if your job requires it.” The corporal said.

Emily cursed. “Sorry I didn’t know.”

“It’s ok I’ll put it in the log that you check out with me and that I accompanied you to the armory. Just … you know, don’t do it again.”

Emily cursed again. “I am really sorry and it won’t happen again. I owe you big for this.”

“Nah I owe you. You pulled me to safety when I got shot six months ago. If it wasn’t for you my mother would have had someone come knock on her door.” The corporal said looking really serious.

“I don’t even remember him.” Emily thought to herself.

“You don’t owe me for that. We are Rangers. It's what we do. If I was down and out you would have been the one dragging my sorry butt to safety.” Emily said smiling.

“Like I am strong enough to drag your heavy ass to safety.” The corporal said laughing.

“Dick!” Emily said trying to act shocked.

She went up to her room and tried to lay down to get some sleep but she was wired. She felt bad about leaving when she was not supposed to. Since she was too wired to sleep she went down to the office and filled out the paperwork that the armory Sergeant asked her to do. The paperwork that she had to fill out was to tell the quartermaster who issues her rifle how stupid was she for losing expensive government property and it won't happen again. Just how did she lose it in the first place and that she may have to repay the government for it if it was found that she lost it because she was stupid. It was the same paperwork she had filled out three times before just online this time.

She thought about restarting her language program but didn’t feel like studying so she ended up going to the lounge and watched TV. For some reason, all the reality TV shows playing on Armed Forces TV annoyed her so she ended up watching some Afghani music channel.

She laying on the sofa and bobbing her foot to some song in Urdu about lost love when someone called her name. Looking up over the sofa Emily found Jan standing by the door. “Never is that you?”

“Hey, Jan,” Emily said suddenly really happy.

Jan raced across the room and threw herself over the sofa and on top of Emily laughing. “Welcome back my delinquent convect.”

“Not a convect until after I see the Old Man,” Emily said pretending that Jan weight a lot.

“What are you watching?” Jan said getting off Emily before sitting on Emily’s hip.

“Afghanistan got talent?” Emily said smiling.

“Seriously they got that crap here too,” Jan said disgustedly.

“They got it everywhere,” Emily said with a laugh.

“So what did you do to get to see the Old Man,” Jan asked bobbing her head to the music.

“It’s a long story,” Emily said suddenly depressed again.

“We got time. Well, you do, now. Ha, I am awesome. You see what I did there” Jan said throwing her hand in the air. “So give, what did you do to make you bad girl number one.”

“Not sleeping while on patrol and insubordination,” Emily said with a tired sigh.

Jan was quiet for a bit then started laughing really loud. “That’s what you get in trouble for?”

“Jan, am I going to jail?” Emily asked.

“No. That’s not what happens for NJP. They take away your freedom for forty-five days and then take half your paycheck for forty-five days. It's like work release. You stay in the barracks unless you are going to work. If you're going to get something to eat you have to be escorted by an E4 or higher. Guess who’s at least an E4? Me! I’ll escort your criminal ass everywhere you want to go as long as I am not on duty. I got you Never! Jan said tilting her head to the side.

“Oh, and you also have to muster every day after six for a work party. You work until ten at night. Don’t worry I’ll request you at medical when I work so we can hang out and clean medical. Then after forty-five days your good. They might take a stripe from you but who cares you're an E3 not much difference from E2 pay. It's a lot easier to get E3 back than it is for E4.” Jan said smiling.

“At this rate, I’ll never make E4,” Emily said throwing her arm over her eyes.

“Come on let's head to my room. I have some Mac and cheese we can eat for lunch.” Jan said pulling on Emily’s arm. “I have some Velveeta cheese we can put on it and make really unhealthy.”

That night when Emily went down to the front desk to find out where she was supposed to muster she was told that she was not on restriction yet. She was only confined to the barracks. She was technicality not in trouble until the Colonel set her NJP hearing. She shrugged and went back up to Jan’s room to watch some movies she had gotten off the base computer's cloud drive. That night Emily was woken up twice by nightmares. Giving up on sleeping she headed down to the lounge where she spent the rest of the night watching the Afghani TV.

It was late in the afternoon the next day that the First Sergeant of First Platoon told her that her date for her NJP was going to be on Friday. He told her that she should break out her dress uniform and have it immaculate. Jan helped Emily with her uniform that night and made sure there was nothing out of place and everything was where it was supposed to be.

On Friday Emily made her way to the Ranger building and the Colonel’s office. The Sergeant Major was waiting on her and had her stand at attention while he inspected her uniform. Emily was really glad Jan help her with uniform as she nervously stood for inspection. She also was acutely aware that for the first time in over a year she was without Righteous. Both righteous and her little black knife were sitting on her nightstand back at the barracks.

There was a whole ceremony for when you go in front of the commanding officer of the company. Emily stood at attention then was told to stand at ease then attention again. She wasn’t in so much trouble she would have found it funny. She finally found herself in front of the Colonel. Standing beside the Colonel was the platoon leader of Special Ops. Captain Raskie.

On the Colonel's desk were two folders and a single piece of paper. One of the folders was a military looking Vanilla folder. The second folder was face down and blue next to the first. The Colonel put on his glasses on and picked up the single piece of paper. “Private First Class Emerson you are brought here today because you disobeyed a direct order. You are also here because you were insubordinate to your platoon leader. No one comes before me without first screwing up. You’re here because you screwed up. There is no gray area here. You screwed up and what is worse you screw up in a combat situation that left many of your fellow Rangers in harm's way.”

“I... put my friends in danger?” Emily thought with a flash of anger.

“Captain Hood reports that he directed you to get at least three hours sleep every day. He reports that you went without sleep for many days causing you to lose focus while you were on patrol. Captain Hood also reports that he confronted you many times about this issue and you continued to ignore his order. He reports that you steadily lost respect for his rank as an officer in the army. Including one instance of walking out on him while he was discussing your performance.” The Colonel said up from the single piece of paper to look at her.

“Now a lot of this could be because you were unable to follow his orders and not get the required amount of sleep. The lack of respect for his rank could also be from severe lack of sleep. It could be those things but we don’t know because you did not inform your commanding officer that you were unable to follow his orders.” The Colonel said looking at Emily intently.

A flash of rage roared through Emily. “I informed his incompetent ass several times. He didn’t believe me.” Emily thought to herself.

“Stand down Private.” The Colonel said quietly.

“I am here because he couldn’t believe he was wrong. Screw him.” Emily thought to herself. She opened her mouth but the Colonel stopped her.

“You are here to listen not to speak. This is not a court of law. This is me passing judgment on you to avoid the possibility of a court-martial and the likelihood of you going to prison. You signed up for this when you enlisted in the army. You will listen to what I have to say and you will do your punishment we will all forget this happened.” The Colonel said quietly.

“For failing to follow a direct order you are reduced one rank from Private First Class E3 to Private E2. You will be eligible for promotion one year from today. For insubordination to a higher ranking officer, you are to forfeit one half your pay for forty-five days. You will be on restriction starting today for forty-five days. You will report to base security for your assignment while on restriction. Dismissed.” The Colonel said each word falling like a hammer on Emily’s shoulders.

The Sergeant Major called her to attention. Told her to salute the Colonel then marched her out of his office. Two MP’s were waiting for her in the outer office. They took her their headquarters where they had her fill out a bunch of paperwork that basically said she understood her punishment and that failure to complete her punishment would mean a court-martial and jail time. They then took her picture and made her a white ID card that had Restriction written on it with big red letters.

“You are signing that you understand what your punishment is. You not signing that you agree with it.” One of the Military Police officers said in a bored tone. He gave her a list of dos and don’ts and times when she had to muster. Being late without a proper excuse would mean the possibility of another NJP or court marshal. The First Sergeant of Special Ops platoon was waiting on her when she left. He signed her out of security. That was a new thing now. She had to check in and out of everywhere.

Emily went back to work for the rest of the day. That night she reported to the security office and met her fellow criminals. To Emily’s surprise, they were from mixed services. There were two Navy guys who got into a fight in the chow tent. Neither of them were in the Navy Seals but they were in the Special warfare command. There was one Marine who had made alcohol in her tent and was caught with it. Then there was Emily. They had all lost one rank. The Marine lost two.

“So what are you here for?” Asked the Marine who used to be an E5.

“Failure to follow orders to sleep while on patrol and insubordination,” Emily said as the group left the security office. They were headed to a golf cart. They were ordered to pick up trash all over the base and bring it to the trash heap to be burned.

“Seriously?” Asked one of the Navy guys.

“Usually you get in trouble for falling asleep on patrol.” The other Navy guys said laughing.

“Oh my god, you're her.” The Marine said stopping just before the golf cart.

“Oh is the Army girl special?” One of the Navy guys said nastily.

“Hell yea she is. She’s Never. Right, your Never.” The Marine lady said.

“When I am not in trouble yea. Right now I am just Private Emerson.” Emily said tiredly.

“Well lookie here we have a celebrity with us tonight.” The nasty Navy guys said pretending to be a hillbilly.

“Hey, do you know the Valkyrie?” The Marine asked sliding over on her seat to give Emily room beside her.

“I'll walk. Sorry, I weight a lot more than it seems. And Yea I know Val.” Emily said standing beside the golf cart.

“Oh, Val is it?” Nasty said waving his arms. “Big bad super knows another big bad super. What a surprise.”

The Marine gave Nasty a look as he sat beside her. Normal Navy guy climbed in on the driver seat. “You sure you want to walk? It's a lot further around the base then it seems.” He asked patting the seat beside him.

“Will you get in already. We will be here all night if we have to go at walking speed.” Nasty said giving Emily a look.

Emily nodded at Normal navy guy and started to jog. He quickly hit the gas pedal to keep up. The crew clearly had a system down because as soon as Normal navy guy stopped they all scattered to the closest barrel to pick up the trash. They got done a few minutes before ten and after checking out from security they all headed back their separate ways.

Jan was waiting for Emily back at the barracks. After asking how the security muster had gone then she wanted to know if Emily wanted to watch a movie in her room. Emily declined politely then left to take a shower. She laid down on her bed for a few minutes then got up and went down to the lounge to watch TV. She fell asleep for a couple of hours on the sofa but jerked awake from a nightmare. Giving up on sleep and she watched TV for the rest of the night.

The next morning, Saturday, the security muster was behind the security building. Everyone was dressed out in Physical Fitness (PT) gear and standing in a group next to a man wearing way too short shorts. It took Emily a few seconds to figure out that they were just tight swimming trunks. The Man in the too short bathing suit and a Navy Seals ball cap looked up as Emily made it to the group. “Great we are all here. Let's go for a little run boys and girls.”

The Seal led the group in a fast pace around the airbase. They circled the base several times when he stopped them for some push-ups and then immediately switched to sit-ups. Emily wasn't even exerting herself in the exercise while the other were going all out and sweating. The two Navy guys were really going out trying to impress the Navy Seal. Emily just did as she was told.

The Navy Seal led them for four hours before calling quits. He looked refreshed while everyone else looked exhausted. Emily looked like she did when she showed up for muster. After PT they were sent out to walk the flight line looking for Foreign Objects and debris (FOD). They were there to pick up anything that didn't belong on the flight line from little rocks and pieces of rubber to plastic wrappers. When they were finished security sent them to paint a building gray. When it got too dark they were sent to a hanger to clean all the oil spots off the floor. At the end of the night, they were sent back to their barracks.

Sunday they were given the morning off for church and uniform check. They were to report to security with their dress uniform for an inspection. After completing their inspection they were sent back to the barracks to get into their work uniforms. Once they mustered again they were sent off to finish painting the building that they started the day before.

During the weekdays' security had them muster an hour before their units mustered in the morning. After mustering at security and being inspected they were sent back to their units to work for the rest of the day. After the day ended they had to muster at six in the evening and work to ten at night. The only relief was if they had duty. Emily really looked forward to duty. It was a day where she could just sit and do nothing.

She was still not sleeping well. She found if she got only three hours of sleep she didn't have any nightmares. She set her alarm to go off three hours after she laid down at night. The best time she found to sleep was around three in the morning. That way she got up to muster for her security muster in the morning. To avoid people asking why she was still up she restarted her language lessons.

On the third week, Mandy the female Marine completed her forty-five and forty-five and was released from the security center. Emily found out why she was cooking alcohol in her barracks. She was dating a guy who said it was impossible. So she took that as a challenge and started to make what she called bathroom punch. She broke up the with the guy and in retaliation he reported her. Her girlfriends in the unit were going around the base making sure everyone knew what he did. Mandy was not really upset about getting reduced in rank twice. She had just been promoted so she lost her promotion and a rank at the same time. She was getting out after her tour was up. Since she was not retiring she would get nothing except the GI bill when she left and that was not affected by her rank. Her job was in high in demand in the civilian sector. So as long as she got an honorable discharge nothing else mattered.

The normal navy guy whose name was Stephen was really nice but he was way too focused on being a Seal. He spent a lot of time working out and brown nosing the real Seals. Nasty whose real name was Michael was a jerk. He kept on hitting on her whenever he got a chance. He only stopped when Emily threatened to report him for sexual harassment. Then he started to talk about all the woman he had slept with. Emily turned him out whenever he opened his mouth

Time seemed to stall while Emily was on restriction. The money really didn't matter much since she had very little to spend it on. Even the reduction of rank didn't matter she was already the lowest ranking member in her company before her reduction in rank. Restriction was really annoying. Spending so much time doing menial labor and having to report all the time was getting to Emily.

She was spending less and less time with Jan and more and more time alone. She knew that was a bad thing but she couldn't stop. She also stopped eating lunch altogether because she was getting embarrassed asking someone to walk her to the chow tent. She could eat breakfast and dinner by stopping by the tent on the way to muster at the security center. Lunch was an altogether different beast. She had to find someone who was willing to go with her to lunch and who won't look down on her for having to ask. No one ever said anything about taking her to the chow tent but she could see the looks they gave her when she asked. It was just easier to stop going to lunch. Emily felt herself going to that dark place again. The one where she was when she was at K-G pass. The problem was she didn't know how to stop it.