Who would have thought that the Outsider-Trait would have a positive effect. One useful enough that it had moved from my discard-list to my keep-list, when looking at optimising my character in the live-version of the game. Sure, it was annoying to get treated like dirt in most societies, but that treatment extended to acting like a social bug-repellant during periods of exuberance.

After we had made our way back to Carinthia, we had realised that yes, the gates of the town were closed during the night, forcing us to spend a relaxing night, sitting on the shores of Lake Thia. The lake, lightly lit by the moon and stars above, had a unique ambience of peace, which Sigmir and I had enjoyed a great deal. Simply sitting there quietly, on a couple of rocks, dangling our feet into the water without thoughts or concerns. It allowed both of us to let go of our vigilance, of caution and paranoia, to simply be. Together.

Come morning, we had moved into Carinthia and, with our return, rumours had instantly spread, making me wonder if they surpassed the speed of light. Certainly, no bushfire could move with such alacrity, not without galeforce-winds to drive it ahead.

By the time we had made our report at the guild and collected the promised reward, a small festival seemed to have broken out, a joyous mood that surpassed everything we had seen on the day before. It made me wonder if these people were habitual drunks or if there was some drug in the air, something undetectable and slow-acting that made them that way. It seemed to be more plausible than a town of happy people.

The brunch, that was akin to dinner for us, the innkeeper put up at a speed that made me wonder whether magic was involved in its creation, despite my nose assuring me that the food was free of magical residue, morphed into a close approximation to hell when the various locals started to voice their appreciation. Luckily, Sigmir quickly realised that I disliked the attention and while she wasn’t able to keep them from noticing and gawking at me, with her looming above and behind me, glaring at everyone who approached while I added my own glare while thinking vicious thoughts, seemed to dissuade them from bothering us too much. It helped that the food was excellent and while I wasn’t certain that beer for breakfast was healthy, it was tasty.

On the other hand, Oliiva, Adra and Rai seemed to be enjoying both the hustle and bustle and the attention we all were getting. I was slightly flabbergasted when a couple of younger towns-people of various species started to flirt with Adra and Rai, who seemed to enjoy it. Just the idea of anyone flirting that aggressively with Sigmir made me consider murder, and the thought that it might happen to me made me incredibly uncomfortable. But maybe they had a different view. It didn’t really need to concern me, as long as both were aware of the other’s actions, they were relatively adult. When I realised that Olivia was flirting even more outrageously than the townspeople, hitting on locals that could easily be her grand-children, I decided that I needed more beer if I wanted to get through the day.

The beer helped to get Sigmir and me tipsy enough to simply focus on the other, not bothering with anyone or anything around us. It didn’t take long for a slightly drunk Sigmir to decide that she wanted to do things to me that weren’t suitable for polite society, or a full common-room, and we retired for the rest of the day, and the subsequent night.

By the time I left Road to Purgatory, I was quite appreciative that there was a bit of a disconnect between the Avatar and my mind, filtering and somewhat lessening the negative sensations while letting the positive parts flow through. Maybe it had been the beer but for some reason, Sigmir had been rather assertive, pushing my body in ways I had never quite been pushed before. It had been uniquely enjoyable, leaving me buzzing all over, but also sore and slightly aching.

The nice thing was, once I had left the capsule, the buzzing was still somewhat there, allowing me to float on the memory of endorphins, almost as if I just had a very, very pleasurable dream, while the physical aches had been left behind in Mundus. Truly, the best of both worlds.

After a quick shower and some shopping, I was right on time for my training with Mrs. Wu, more lessons on human anatomy and how to dismantle another human with the least amount of force. It was quite fascinating, just how breakable the human body was, while her lessons on human behaviour were curiously similar to the lessons my mother had taught me, about behaving in polite society, only that Mrs. Wu’s lessons often had to do with concealing something, while my mother’s lessons had been on recognising what the others were communicating non-verbally in an effort to let me fit in.

Why was it that functioning as an adult in polite society and hiding that you were an operative about to do something nefarious had so much in common? It made me wonder why humans couldn’t be more honest, even if I understood the reasons. Human society was mostly built on lies, on deception and the presentation of a mask, with make-up, clothing, styling and decorum to conform. When I mentioned my observation to Mrs. Wu, she was quite amused, explaining that fitting into society was supposedly an innate ability but that the various forms of decorum that had been established over the centuries were created to identify the outsiders. It was a different form of tribalism and just as silly.

After we were done with our direct and personal training, done out of sight in a private room at the back of the gym, she set me a set of difficult, if not particularly punishing, forms and left, to prepare dinner for her husband. I was still somewhat amused by the fact that outwardly, she was the perfectly integrated wife and grandmother, supporting her equally elderly husband in his pursuits, while I was very much aware that she had the ability to kill without question and I was as certain as I could be that she had done so. It made me wonder who the “real” Mrs. Wu was, the kindly, grandmother or the ruthless, at times even sadistic, instructor who was training me in the art of murder. Or maybe neither was, and there was another facet of her being beneath both masks, hidden from everyone, maybe even herself.

Flowing from one form into the next, carefully controlling and contorting my body as instructed, a part of my mind started to wander. The recent meeting with Chris made me wonder, and consider. Back at school, there had been persistent rumors that the two of us were a couple, a notion I thought utterly silly. But the same went for the idea of a romantic relationship of any kind, the idea that you needed someone to “complete” you, someone you wanted to be close to for no reason other than they were who they were, it had all sounded idiotic. Until I had started to play Road to Purgatory and met Sigmir in that snowy forest.

Somehow, I had changed, but had it been that moment, seeing her stand deviantly before the wolves, until her body gave out? Or had the change within me happened before that time and I had simply failed to encounter the right conditions to experience it?

My wandering mind meandered back to the meeting with Chris, and more specifically, to his introduction to his wife. The way she glared at me, as soon as she heard my name. Thinking back to earlier, to my own behaviour in Mundus, in that common-room, and the people coming towards either Sigmir or me. Both of us had glared at them, keeping them away, to keep our privacy. I almost lost my inner rhythm when I realised that the glare she had given me was nigh identical to the glare I had given the people that had wandered close.

Focusing a little, trying to remember what had been going through my head at the time, I realised that I had mostly glared at the young women, especially those with better… ass-ets than me, that I had tried to keep them away to keep Sigmir to myself. Jealousy. In retrospect, it felt a little weird, especially without the frame of mind I normally had as Morgana. Did I really think Sigmir would pick some farmer’s girl over me? Just because she had udders to rival a cow, or more ass than a mule?

Amused, mostly at my own realised behaviour, I tried to think back how Sigmir had acted, at which people she had glared predominantly. When her soft growls had become loud enough to be actually audible and at which people those had been directed. Time and my own lack of focus at the time made it hard to judge, but I thought she had mostly growled at the approaching young men of the town.

It took me a moment to recover after stumbling from the realisation and forced myself to focus on what I was doing, instead of letting my mind wander. But I was rather amused, at least until Mrs. Wu saw me with a grin on my face and decided that I needed more and harder exercises, if I was able to smile.