Narlom stretched out his staff, and I watched as my ring flew out from Malthan’s grasp, back into the mess he had retrieved it from. Next, the gory mess itself seemed to come back together, gradually forming into a hand. I saw as time began to rewind, the ruined elemental titan coming back together as if it had never been blown apart.

I felt something tugging at my mind, yet a stronger force holding me in place. Nope, can’t have you going and reverting like that. Would take so much longer to explain things. I heard Malthan’s voice yet again in my thoughts. What ever happened to the blue screens of annoyance?

Anyways, soon I saw the titan standing ready for battle, frozen in mid stride as it charged towards the giant Celeste. Nodding his head, Narlom seemed satisfied with this result. “Alright, it’s done. Once everyone heads back, space will repair and time will resume.” He spoke lazily, as if he didn’t care to say any more beyond that. With a slight wave, he turned and walked through the shattered space he had appeared from. Like he had said, as soon as he stepped through the hole in the world appeared to mend itself.

“You all go ahead.” Malthan called out to them with a smile. “My champion’s got some explanations to hear, and a mountain of questions to ask.” Hiren flinched at his words, as if about to retort, until he spoke out again. “You know he’s already earned the qualifications. Explaining things to him now is entirely within the rules.”

She hesitated, but nodded a moment later. “You are correct. But, take care of who may overhear. I would not wish to have to judge you, Malthan.” Her voice seemed to turn soft after she said that, like she was an old friend of his.

“I know, I know. I’ll take all the usual precautions.” He assured her, after which she reluctantly left with the others. Only Aria stayed behind longer, clasping hands with Malthan and passing him something. When he felt it, he blinked in mild surprise, a grin growing on his face. “Shoulda known. You head on back, kid. We’ll be there to join you soon.”

Aria nodded her head slightly, turning and running into one of the last two regions of shattered space, as if she couldn’t wait to get back. Seeing that only his own little door to the beyond remained, Malthan spared it a brief glance. “Close.” The single word shook my mind even more than the previous battle, as if something about it was… wrong. Space warped around the shattered region, covering it up as if it had never existed in the first place.

With that, I suddenly found myself back in my body, inside the titan. Unable to adjust for the sudden momentum, I tripped and fell face first, sliding several meters before coming to a stop. “John…” I heard Celeste’s confused voice. “Where did Abzul go?” Okay, so clearly she wasn’t privy to what had happened. “And why is there a Qu’lopti sitting on your head?”

“Ah, this…” I tried to figure out how to explain, sensing that Malthan had found a new perch when I had fallen down. However, before I could, Malthan himself spoke up.

“Hey, toots! Nice to meetcha face to face! I’m Malthan, lord of chaos, bringer of madness, and often purveyor of cheese. I’ve got a few words for Johnny here, so would you mind sending the real you down here for a minute first? Before things go too far.” His words seemed to have a hidden meaning to them, and Celeste flinched as she heard it. Nonetheless, she nodded.

A few moments later, there was a white light that appeared in front of me, and the normal Celeste appeared. Well… not really. Her human-like appearance was completely gone, replaced by the vague, expressionless robotic body she had long ago. A quick scan told me what had happened… Celeste didn’t have her soul anymore. “What..” I started to ask, before she turned to look at me.

Thankfully, her voice seemed unchanged. “Deus Ex Machina. It’s the final form of my personal skill. In order to use it, I have to sacrifice my entire soul to temporarily imbue it into the construct formed from all of my spare bodies.” She glanced back towards the slowly standing Celeste. “It will degrade over time, likely within a few hours.”

“But… why?” I couldn’t help but ask, looking between Celeste and… well, Celeste. Malthan didn’t seem to have a problem staying rooted on my head as it turned.

“What do you mean why, silly?” She asked, and even without expressions I could tell that her voice sounded happy. “If you died, the rest of us wouldn’t last much longer. But, if you lived, isn’t there still the chance for me to get my soul back? This isn’t some noble sacrifice or anything like that. I’m totally expecting a new soul.”

I nodded my head slightly as she said that. “Then, what did he mean about things going too far?”

“Uhm… not sure.” She answered, her voice uncertain. “Maybe she thought you’d panic if you saw the big me start breaking down?” Malthan nodded his head, as if to confirm that guess.

“Alright. Now that that’s taken care of, back to the ship with you. There are still some stragglers up there, and I’ll be borrowing the big girl.” He said, snapping his finger. Not only the original Celeste, even the big one suddenly vanished from my view, replaced by the massive, towering form of Sharon merged with the lunar titan.

Malthan let out a sigh as he saw her looking around in confusion. “Revert.” His word echoed through the world again, and I watched Sharon suddenly shrinking down into her normal appearance. “Speaking of which. Shouldn’t you be turning back to normal now too, John?”

Not so eager to experience whatever power he was using to fuck with reality, I hurriedly ordered the elemental soldiers to return to the ring. Thankfully, when they did so, Malthan did not continue sitting on my head… instead, as the rush of mana pushed him away, he gently landed on the ground. “That’s better… Now, we’re still missing someone.”

This time, when he snapped his fingers, it was Yin that appeared. She looked around in confusion, much as Sharon was, until the two of them saw each other, and then me. “John… what is happening?” Sharon was the first to ask.

“I’m… not sure?” I answered, looking towards Malthan.

“Before all of that. Yin.” He called out to her, walking over to the confused Yin. “Do you want to be with Sharon and John, no matter what happens or where they go?”

“Yes.” She instantly replied, as if the question did not even require any thought.

“Even if it means leaving Yang?”

“...” This time, she seemed to hesitate, before nodding her head again. “Yes. She is not alone anymore.” The words seemed more difficult for her to say, but she was still determined.

“Good. I like you.” Grinning, he reached out his hand, grabbing hers before she could react and placing something in it. When he pulled his hand back, I saw a small cloth badge, in the form of a curved black teardrop with a white dot near one end. The old Earth symbol for Yin. “Hold onto that, and you’ll be able to listen to what I’m about to tell these two, kay? Kay.”

Saying that, he turned and walked a short distance away, before facing us. “Congratulations! The three of you now qualify to become lords of the lower realms, wielders of unimaginable power, and eternally bored out of your mind!” He said, lifting his thin arms up into the air as he grinned broadly.

“Uhm… pardon me? What?” I questioned as I looked to the god who seemed to have taken a dose of his own insanity.

“Now, John, that’s just rude. I’m being totally serious. You all passed the requirements!” He raised his arms up once again, before lowering them with a sigh. “Okay… more explanation needed. Where did I put my expositional presentation? Screw it, we’re doing this the old fashioned way. By the way, John, Celeste can’t hear any of this, I blocked her off for now. Rules and all that.”

I faintly nodded my head, remembering the words Hiren had left Malthan with before going ‘home’. “Okay… so… about that explanation?”

“Right, right. Anyways, there are a lot of ways to ascend to godliness. Most of them just require time before someone naturally finds the way. Like old Zuuly. We kept waiting on someone to appear when it was his turn, and he managed to stumble upon a half dead divine dragon. Being the hungry, starving monster he was, he ate the beast and became the God of War. Other methods include reaching the Godly tier in any skill, or growing a universe of your own to rule in as practice. That’s where you two come in.” He said, pointing to Sharon and myself.

Okay, so that’s what he meant when he said that it’d be a good thing for her to be there when it evolved… not just shared ownership, then. “Right, John.” He nodded towards me, obviously eavesdropping on my thoughts. “As for you, Yin. Through matters that would take too much time to explain, but I’ll be demanded to do so anyways, that badge of yours holds the divinity of Abzul.”

“When a god has their divinity stripped due to breaking the rules and offending another god, that god gains their divinity and has the right to hand it out to whoever sees fit. I saw fit to give it to you, enough said about that. So, moving on.” He clapped his hands, no doubt not wanting any of us to question his words yet.

“Why am I becoming a god? What does it mean for those I care about? What kind of food do gods get to eat? I’m glad you didn’t ask that, because I’ll answer anyways! You see, it’s a tale as old as time, a song as old as--whoops, almost went off track there.” He said, looking towards Sharon and Yin accusingly. Well, one of them is technically an evolved animal, and the other is quite the beauty….

“Way back in the future, trillions of years from now, there existed a powerful being. His race had long since evolved pass mortal bodies, becoming one with the universe itself to gain eternity. But, eternity only lasts so long. He saw death on the horizon, the heat death of the entire universe. The stars were going out, darkness fell, questions were asked, and I’m making too many references.” Malthan briefly slapped himself, getting himself back on the topic. Why do I get the feeling that he doesn’t talk to new people often.

“In order to save the universe itself, as well as his own immortal soul, this being tapped into the hidden powers of his race, separating himself from the universe. After that, he existed above the universe, to the left of the universe, beyond it, however you want to put it. He was in a realm all his own, but he was not without power. He used his power to initiate a grand ‘reset’ of everything. The big red button for all of creation.”

“Hidden inside his own little world, he was unaffected by the universe being born anew. He created a plan to save everyone. To create more people like him, and use their powers to prevent the end of time itself. So he chose someone from the myriad of galaxies, someone he found worthy. And then they did it all again.”

“After the first couple gods appeared, they noticed that with each reset, the universe itself forgot about everyone that lived in the realm of gods. They would not be born again, their children would never appear, etcetera. So, they began devising a system by which to choose gods, preparing them for this grand mission. That was when the First released a portion of his power into the universe. The ability to alter reality itself intertwined within all of creation, forming what is now known as magic.”

I glanced around to Sharon and Yin, and found Sharon desperately opening her mouth, trying to speak. Yet, her words would not come out. Okay, so no interruptions after all, then. “With the creation of magic came monsters, powerful beasts formed of this new energy. This created an even greater danger to the people of the universe, so they had to… revise things.”

“In order to properly raise the beings of the world to fight the monsters, while also giving birth to the gods that the First sought, they systemized everything. They assigned levels and classes, various restrictions in order to keep everything in check. This is the game-like system that you know now.”

“Time passed, yada yada, more gods came in. But soon, many gods began to focus on the journey more than the destination. After the first thousand or two, they stopped worrying about the end of time. After all, they can reset time whenever they wished, so why is it a problem for them?”

“More time passed, and more gods came in. Soon, people forgot all about the original goal. Right now, there are maybe a handful of gods that even know about it.” And you’re one of them… “And I’m one of them. So, eventually the First simply faded away, either leaving for some higher world, or simply returning to his own place in time. We’re not really sure, since no timeline has ever made it that far before getting the big red button treatment.”

At this point, I had to speak up, and was surprised to find my voice even worked. “Wait wait wait, you’re saying that each timeline gets deleted whenever the new gods or whatever come in?” I looked back towards Yin, who suddenly had a panicked look on her face.

“What? No, ah, sorry. Maybe I should call this one the big blue button? We only take one god, or one batch of gods in cases like this, from each timeline before their purpose is fulfilled. From now on, even if someone meets the requirements in this timeline, they can’t ascend. And once you three do, this timeline will go into the archives.”

I looked back to Yin again, and saw her raising her hand. “You can speak.” Malthan told her with a nod. “You can’t, yet.” He then said, looking to Sharon, who returned the glance with a glare.

“Can… can we visit the archived timelines… like you are doing now?” Yin asked, her voice shaking.

“Of course you can!” Malthan answered with a wide smile. “You can come back and visit Yang and the others from time to time. And, since this is the timeline in which you came to power, you won’t be as restricted as we are.”

Yin nodded her head with a relieved sigh. “Now, to answer Boobs McGee. Yes, I’ve still been hearing all those noisy comments, I’ve just been ignoring them so that these two could hear the explanation. No, John did not kill Abzul. He totally could have, if Zuuly didn’t break the rules. The Primal Titan is damned near invincible against a warrior type like him.”

“As for why he did all of this? Yes, you can stop asking now. After the First went away, some of us noticed his absence. Zuuly was one of them, and he began coming up with a plan to bring down the system. If its creator had given up hope, why bother, right? He took all of the most advanced technology and tactics from various timelines in order to create massively overpowered ships, all for the purpose of making an unstoppable fleet that would essentially neuter a timeline before it could produce a god. You see, we have to borrow the burst of energy that comes with the ascension of a new god in order to hit that big blue button. No new god, no button.”

“This was his thirteenth attempt to basically destroy everything. In the other twelve, he failed for various reasons. Either a champion appeared strong enough to kill him before his plan was complete, or someone in a completely different galaxy managed to meet the conditions to ascend before he got to them. But, he had always been a good sport about it before, taking a few dozen cycles to adjust his plan before trying again. I guess he got fed up with it after thinking that John here cheated.” Malthan said with a shrug. Sharon finally stopped trying to talk, nodding as if she had gotten her answers.

“So.. the reason why the Qu’lopti were in danger of being destroyed before…” I glanced at Malthan curiously. If I followed his logic, then there was naturally a time when that didn’t happen.

“Right. The guys that were able to pull everyone together already went up. We have a really high compatibility with this system, so my race produces gods pretty easy.” Malthan explained with a smug grin. “But… that means that once everyone who can has gone up, the rest are just a bunch of retarded children. Still, they almost always manage to discover the different systems all on their own. They just get killed when they meet other races…”

I nodded my head slightly as I heard that. “Okay… So what happens now?”

“Well, first of all, there’s this little trick we always pull on the new gods to help them get acquainted with all of these concepts.” Malthan explained. “Consider it a hazing ritual. Pardon the headaches. Talk more soon!” With that, he snapped his fingers. The next thing I knew, my vision had gone black.