《The Misplaced Dungeon》Chapter 135
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* * * SIN TCHAI THE MESSENGER * * *
A shaken Sin Tchai crept back to the Gardens of Paradise. He found himself staring at the palace, Meek’aym’ooz’s palace far sooner than he wanted. He was well aware that he was screwed. The only thing left to do was to minimise the damage. And that meant avoiding Meek’aym’ooz. It shouldn’t be difficult, after all he had never met Meek’aym’ooz before.
The trouble was, as soon as any functionary heard what had happened on Ambuila, He would be kowtowing in front of Meek’aym’ooz. Everyone would be scrambling to keep their heads on their shoulders.
Reluctantly he crept towards the servant’s entrance. Normally he avoided it, but he did sort of qualify as a servant. He stepped into the palace. He found himself in a depressing grey passageway. He was lucky. He didn’t meet anyone. Actually given the dusty state of the floor he suspected that this entrance didn’t get much use.
Once he was in the more travelled public corridors Sin Tchai clutched an envelope and walked briskly. As he looked as if he was expected, he avoided being stopped. Finally he found himself in front of the elaborate double doors to Foozharn Longlegs suite of offices. He smiled at the two honour guards and waved his envelope. “Would one of you be so kind as to deliver this to the honourable secretary?” he asked hopefully.
Sin Tchai breathed a sigh of relief when the guards ignored him and opened one of the doors. They showed no emotion, but Sin Tchai spotted the sadistic glint in their eyes.
Calling up all his guile and acting ability he edged his way into the opulent receiving room. He edged his way towards the desk behind which Foozharn’s principal secretary reigned. He noted with well concealed relief that his humble – and excessive – bowing and nervous looks had gained that worthy’s attention.
“What do you want messenger?”
Sin Tchai licked his lips, “Erm – I have a reply written by a goddess. A goddess lord Foozharn Longlegs and the great Meek’aym’ooz ordered to present herself. Erm – you will see the great lord gets it, won’t you noble lady.”
Sassa-arrissa looked down at the cringing messenger. She could clearly see he did not wish to be present. She found that suspicious, as messengers were notorious attention seekers. “Let’s see that message,” she demanded.
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She snatched the – open – envelope from the messenger’s hand and barked, “Wait!”
She slipped the message out of the envelope, and her eyes flew open in shock when she read the brief missive. No wonder that miserable individual wanted someone else to deliver this message. Just to be certain, she passed the letter over a detector, confirming it had been written by one of the lesser gods. The ones exiled from the Gardens.
She returned the brief letter to the envelope with a shudder. “You’re the messenger. It’s your job to deliver this.” She turned to one of her flunkies, “Show him into Lord Foozharn.”
Maintaining his act, Sin Tchai followed the grinning flunkey with visible reluctance. He cursed to himself when the flunkey, throwing open the door to Foozharn’s office, announced him.
“Great Lord Foozharn Longlegs, a messenger has arrived bearing a missive from the lower realms.”
Sin Tchai stiffened his spine and walked steadily into the presence of one he considered to be – at least, marginally sensible.
Foozharn cocked his head and fixed Sin Tchai with one shining yellow eye. “Oh I say boy. You failed me boy. Why did you not fetch your previous messages to me as ordered. Boys these centuries, they just don’t listen.”
Sin Tchai held himself stiff. “My lord, I was intercepted. The delegation led by Orinaar Trin’arbour arrived at the start of the Mother of Monsters attempt to seize primacy in Ambuila.
“Orinaar Trin’arbour made an unfortunate comment and included his delegation amongst her enemies.
“The Mother of Monsters and her allies triumphed without loss. Orinaar Trin’arbour and two of lord Meek’aym’ooz’s guard were slain. Lord Villius of the Eyes was watching from the future. I observed a trio of eyes surrounded by a reddish haze."
Foozharn Longlegs froze for an instant, then he snapped claw tipped fingers and held out a down covered hand. “Oh I say boy – hand me that letter boy. I’m not deaf. I heard Sassa-arrissa's flunkey.”
Hesitantly, Sin Tchai withdrew his precious letter and placed it gently in the outstretched hand.
Foozharn ran his eyes over the letter and managed to jerk his head up, so that the plume of fire that erupted from his beak scorched the ceiling, and not his hand and the letter he was holding.
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Still staring at the ceiling Foozharn broke into laughter. “Oh I say boy, she is a fiery, a fiery little thing.”
Sin Tchai blinked. He was feeling stupefied, laughter was the last thing he had expected. And, then too, he would never have described that terrifying goddess as small.
Then he froze as Foozharn examined him. “Villius? You will go to Villius, boy. You will tell him I want to see him. What are you doing here boy?”
Sin Tchai recovered his wits and fled, grateful to be still alive.
* * * PARTHIA – MARKOWITZ * * *
Markowitz has used his exile in this primitive backwater to make notes. He was now reluctantly certain that he was no longer on Earth. He was going to recommend that the US take over the Moon Base. He was certain it would be easy. There were several shops with gates in the US. It would be easy.
Then they could take over the country the stupid girl believed she ruled. It would even be for her own good. The poor girl was a minor, and she was obviously deluded, and needed help. There was no other reason for a US citizen to consider herself a goddess.
They would have to locate the people behind her. They would seem to be responsible for many deaths. Possibly for that massacre in Somalia too. They had to be made to pay.
He watched as Helli flirted with Tomcat under the semi-hostile eyes of the cat man’s concubine. The damn bigamist obviously couldn’t be legally married. Not when he lived in a country that would soon be taken over.
The agent had been reluctant, but he had managed to persuade her that it was for the greater good.
He watched as they left the bizarre iron structure in the middle of the ocean, they had dropped off a party of so called adventurers there.
When they finally arrived at their destination, Markowitz was eager to get back to Washington so as to be able to file his report, and to lobby for the logical takeover. He headed for the US embassy the moment he disembarked. Half of his escort had to scramble in order to keep up with him. The other half remained behind with the independent contractors.
Markowitz had already made clear his thoughts as to the total waste of time and treasure they represented. His report was also, rather uncomplimentary, regarding the army presence. They were uncouth, and – unappreciative of his knowledge and opinions.
* * * PARTHIA – MARY * * *
Mary noted when Tomcat entered her domain, bored, she scanned the Alessandrina’s Glory and her passengers and crew. She grinned as she noted the seeds many of the crew had. She noted that two crew members had used the gift to acquire gills on the line of her sea humans.
She was unable to avoid laughing. She looked at her voice. “Tomcat’s wives are going to kill him,” she grinned.
Drinna’s eyes widened, “Another one?”
“Yes,” grinned Mary. “I suppose he was indulging just before, or just after, the fight. The divine mana seed must have negated the contraceptive enchantment, and drug, and boosted both of their fertilities.”
Drinna giggled and looked downright mischievous. “Can I tell the wives?”
“By all means. I’m going to break the good news to Tomcat.”
« Tomcat, congrats on the new baby to be. »
« What baby Mother? »
« Why, the one you planted in Helli on the night of my takeover of Ambuila. »
« Oh shit! The ladies are going... »
« Has that rockhead Markowitz learned anythin’, or is he as objectionable as ever. »
« He is worse Mother, and will you be the child’s godmother? »
Mary laughed again.
« If she agrees, and if she doesn’t have an abortion. And I guess you want Drina to baptise the kid. »
« Yes. »
* * *
Mary linked to Trisha and Drina. The three watched with glee as Tomcat went to tell Clarrina the news. Clarrina threw her hands up in the air and glared at the contraception amulet hanging around her husband’s neck. After a few heated words they went to find Helli.
The three snoops lost interest at that point and each went her way with wide smiles.
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