* * * FRAGATTA – MARY * * *

Mary watched her guests emerge from her spaceships after their trip to Kanaloa. Markowitz still seemed to be fuming and his minders and even Helly seemed on edge. Jerry and Damien seemed resigned to the situation. They seemed to be trying to avoid and ignore their superior.

‘Now where are those four going? The only things down that corridor are either stores of salted fish or empty storerooms.’ She grinned to herself, ‘and of course that portal behind the locked door marked “authorised personnel only” that’s just ’round the corner. Let me create it now. Lock, check. Sign, check. Ooo, easier than shootin’ fish in a barrel. Now why would anyone want to shoot fish in a barrel? Portal... check.’

« Lewis, do you mind helping me out here. Check out the new one-way portal. Do you mind setting up another to some backwater location on Parthia. And see that the FBI idiots stumble over a pack of emergency supplies that contains a sat phone. And, much as I dislike the idea – a skill crystal with tradetalk. »

« What are you up to now Mary? But fine, no problem. »

« Take a look. Mycroft, be a dear and squirt a compressed data-dump of Markowitz and his stooges to Lewis. »

Mary watched with glee as Durrell picked the lock on the door. They entered the empty room and examined the portal. Helly poked her head through and looked around. She withdrew her head as Mary juggled things to allow it.

“It’s an empty room with a table and five chairs. There is one door. There are two ring binders on the table and two backpacks leaning against the wall.”

Markowitz impetuously stepped through the portal followed by his minders. Helly remained behind, standing nervously by the door. Mary waited for several minutes savouring Markowitz’s rage when he realized the portal wouldn’t let him return.

She reached out for her other self on Earth and they shared a laugh. Then while her other me was postponing their plot on Earth, Mary urged a squad of guards to march down the corridor telling them to chat amongst themselves.

‘And that’s a full house,’ chortled Mary to herself as she watched Helly dart through the portal, intent on warning Markowitz.

* * * PARTHIA – MARKOWITZ * * *

Markowitz glared at the table. He was cursing himself for being impulsive. He knew he should have sent Durrell or Smyth to check the room out. But now they were all here. The ring binders made it clear that they had crashed a training and familiarization exercise.

It would seem that they were on Parthia. On a small continent about the same size as Australia called Fraldator by the natives. The nearest settlements were both about twenty kilometres distant. The backpacks contained emergency supplies for five people including two sat phones and five so called skill crystals with the local trade language.

“What do you think Durrell? Should we use those crystals? Not sure I trust them.”

“Well boss, I personally don’t like the disclosure. What idiots would sign on for this kind of training? And how can we phone our sponsor and trainer for pickup? How can we trust those crystal things?”

Markowitz swung round when Helly popped into existence. He listened with resignation when she warned him that a patrol was on the way and it was time to leave.

“We’d love to Castro, but that was a one way portal for the next training group.”

“Here Helly, take this and press it to your forehead and think ‘evoke’ at it,” said Durrell as he passed Helly one of the skill crystals.

Markowitz snapped his mouth shut and watched with narrowed eyes as Helly did so. She frowned and rubbed her head. “I could do with an aspirin, you could have warned me about the headache Durrell. My head feels stuffed.”

Markowitz turned his head. “As I have no interest in meeting the monsters that are due shortly let’s go. Durrell, Smyth grab one of the backpacks and lets go.” Markowitz picked up one of the ring binders and headed for the door behind Durrell. “Castro, come along and fetch the other binder. You’ll need to read it.”

Ten minutes later they were standing in front of a small rectangular stone building adorned with some statues of creatures found in the writings of Lewis Carroll. They were on a small muddy island in the middle of a swamp. To their front lay a thin corduroy road or path. The drone of insects was the only sound. Smyth fished out one of the sat phones and switched it on.

“We have a signal,” he said sounding surprised.

* * * EARTH – IN THE NEWS * * *

“Yesterday at several locations in the US, the military established cordons around shops belonging to Portals plc. We have been able to confirm that several countries have reacted in a similar fashion.

“The travel industry has reacted with disbelief to the news that some people were able to travel to other countries for fifteen dollars before the military closed the shops down.

“We were able to speak with the company’s spokesperson, Ms Lane Loisdottir. We apologise for the sound quality and the delays as Ms Loisdottir is in the company headquarters on the Moon.

“Ms Loisdottir what can you tell us about these outrageous rumours?”

“First let me ask the various governments to free our staff. The individuals in question are all students looking to earn some cash, and all they know is how to operate a computerised teller and what buttons to press to open the doors to the portals. They are not to blame for the fact that the portals have ceased to work.”

“I put it to you that they never did work.”

“If so, why have so many governments reacted as they have? And how is it that I am on the Moon?”

“But how can you get by charging fifteen dollars?”

“That was a loss leader, an introductory offer on our first day. We will be charging a minimum of one hundred and twenty dollars in future. As we are doing so in the three countries where we are operating freely.”

“Minimum? Are you planning to offer different fares depending on where you operate?”

“Naturally. We have to cover all local taxes imposed on our service.”

* * *

The cameras showed a noisy demonstration outside the headquarters of NASA. The barely restrained mob was waving banners and placards denouncing the ecological defilement of Mars.

“Well David, what do you think of the protestors arguments.”

“Well George, I believe they are demonstrating in the wrong place. NASA has nothing to do with what is happening on Mars.”

“Certainly David, but NASA represents humanity in the solar system.”

“But George, The ones on Mars are the Lobsters.”

“Are you sure David? According to NASA their spaceship is heading towards Jupiter at the moment.”

“Come on George, if that’s the case, who is setting up those mirrors over their settlement on Mars? The Martians?”

“Well David, maybe there really are Martians, and they’re working with the aliens.”

* * *

“This is Jaime Teixeira here in Port-Au-Prince. I can confirm that one of the local dolphins has taken to using magic to create some mind-bending illusions.

“Then too she can talk. As to be expected Darting-merrily-through-the-waves doesn’t speak French, English or Spanish. But my colleagues and I were able to gain the ability to speak her language thanks to the donation of something MagiTech inc. calls a ‘skill crystal’.

“We spoke with a company spokesperson. Ms Loisdottir assured us that these ‘skill crystals’ would be joining their standard offerings. A simple single use basic language skill crystal would retail for six thousand dollars. An advanced skill crystal retails for twenty thousand and contains a larger vocabulary including specialised terms along with cultural references.

“And the language suitable to speak with dolphins is, ‘common trade (Parthia)’.

“Rather bizarrely, my friend Ruth finds it a language that helps her understand her spells. She claims it is very well structured in regards to understanding magical concepts.”

* * * PARTHIA – DUNGEON EXCHANGE * * *

Blue Lagoon: In regards to the recent feeding frenzy. To clarify, yes I do have access and control of the tech needed to access the Earth’s Internet. And yes, I am open to providing satelite coverage and access. Now let us talk rent. Computers with appropriate software and satellite uplinks will cost you a once off gold or silver payment to cover production costs. Service will cost two units of energy per month or eighteen per annum if payed by the year. This will include a firewall maintained by my AIs.

Blue Lagoon: And no, there will be no censorship. You will have access to whatever you can find. I will not aid the CIA or any other alphabet agency to get in touch with you. But then I will not hinder them either.

Skylark Meadows: Is this offer restricted to Azurea’s current crop or is it open to all of us?

Blue Lagoon: Everyone is welcome Kai Lung. The more the merrier.

Unamed (Chee Jong-Su): Wait! Does that mean you have satelites in orbit.

Blue Lagoon: *snicker* Yes. Complete coverage. Spy and com sats. And other things...