《Ultra A.I.》V2.34 - Last of The Tiger Gang
Advertisement
We make a philosophy to explain our life. Then our life changes.
Vali
1 Day Later (Lighthome Time) - Captain Buzz - The Honey Trap Mead Bar
I take a big swig of sour mead. Watch a young male gyrate on stage. Roll another joint. Goddamn this is a terrible bar. Guess it suits me well enough.
My contact is late. I’m tempted to give up. Drink with authority. Have at that young fella. Be a queen for the night. I don’t. My contact will be along. Eventually. And my body count is high enough.
I spark up, to the annoyance of the killer bees at the next table. One sneers at me. “They use smoke to keep us docile.”
I blow smoke in her face. Her wings thrum in anger, but I have nary a fuck to give. I may be a hiveless, broken down old honey bee, but I’m also Captain Buzz. Last of the Tiger Gang. Try me, cunt. I’ll show you docile.
Miss Killer gets up, but her friends pull her away. Smart. I return to regrets and ruminations. How the fuck did it come to this?
After the Winter Invasion, the gangs of Helhome were virtually wiped clean. It would have been an amazing opportunity if anybody had two brain cells working together.
I had two brain cells, but no plan. A spy with no one to spy for. Should I have kept looking for Tiger? Then what? The Tiger Gang was always a little hazy on step two. Finding Tiger had been a dream. A theme. A code. A lie. Finding Tiger may have been Cy’s goal, but the Tiger Gang’s goal was to follow Cy. Come Hel or Highgarden.
It took me a while to realize that. The lies we tell ourselves are the most carefully crafted. I stopped looking for Tiger. I stopped looking for the Tiger Gang. I started looking for Cy. I did not find him.
But I’m not totally useless. And Helhome was in shambles. With some wit, and will, and murder, I found Cy’s old sacred text. The one taken from him when he first reached Helhome. A short, but illuminating read. Mostly about a gnome and an orc and a reminder to steal his real text back from Wrecker. Really put the Winter Invasion in a new perspective.
So here I am, looking for Cy in Lighthome. Because he’s not in Helhome, and he’s not in Lowgarden, and I’ve run out of good ideas.
A business-like bee bustles into the bar. I figure she’s my contact, so I wave her over. She slides into my booth and I slide her a mead and a joint. She accepts both with a happy nod. Guess she’s not all business.
Advertisement
“Pleased to meet you, Captain Buzz. I am Agent 52. Unfortunately, The Hive does not have great news. None of the people you are looking for are on Lighthome.”
I frown. This is not news. I know they’re not here. If they were here, I’d have found them. I want to know where they went. “Cool. Do you know why they left?”
She regales me with a micro history of the burnt branch. Gnomes and thunderbolts and battle magi used against each other. It’s interesting, but not particularly useful. I’d already pieced most of this together from what I learned in Lowgarden. I find more interest in what she doesn’t say.
“What happened to the harpy?”
She shrugs. “We don’t know. She survived the battle. Was on the scene until she disappeared a week ago.”
I nod. “Where was she last seen?”
“At her nest. About five hours straight up. Smells of chrome and condor. Can’t miss it.”
Five hours straight up? Fuck I hate Lighthome.
Bee-52 invites me to her hive for more detail, but I demure. Five hours later, I boozily buzz into Saga’s nest. It’s a cutesy little treehouse. It’s also a wreck. Burnt to shit and torn to fuck. There’s ash. And chrome and condor. But it also smells of elf and ozone. What fucking elf lights a fire in the great tree?
I find the remains of her sacred text. Crystals sewn in cloth. There’s just fragments left. A life reduced to non-sequiturs. One scrap says Tell Cy. I’d love to, lass.
I squat in the remains of Saga’s life. Roll another. What now?
I’ve run every lead in Cy’s short text and got nothing. Every lead I can check. Can’t get to Wreckworld. Could probably get a symbol blessed by Wrecker, but I’ve nothing left to sacrifice. Nothing but hope.
I smoke, read, and ruminate. I can’t get to Wreckworld, but do I need to? Fucking place blew up. Must have thrown a few bodies clear. I could look for some of these people in other realms. Like Vali. He’s probably in Gianthome. I can get there.
A few hours later I’m back at the Honey Trap. I give up. Hurl a few killer bees around. Destroy a young man in the bathroom. Smoke, and smoke, and do my best to drink the bar dry. It’s good.
I wake to pain. Loud pain. Why so loud, pain? Need water. Quiet water.
“Hello sister.” says a humongous bumblebee. “I’m Bee-12. Welcome to Gianthome. Did you get here the hard way?”
Advertisement
“... water…”
“Yes, you did. Let me take you to the water.”
I’m gently refreshed by being dumped in a raging river of alcohol. I barely survive, but my hangover doesn’t. It’s traumatically effective. I come out feeling great.
“So! To business. I’m looking for a giant named Vali.”
Bee-12 bobs cheerfully. “We can find him. Let’s go ask the hive.”
“Negative.” Helhome doesn’t have a hive. The other realms do, but I’ve never been to one. I plan to someday. Not today. “I’m too busy. You go ask and come tell me.”
Bee-12 bobs, takes my busyness at face value. Bees don’t lie, so I must be busy. She thunders off, as I look for something to do.
A few hours later, Bee-12 thrums back. Vali lives in a glacier a few days North. She offers me a ride. I’ll be deaf by the time we get there, but I gratefully accept. The fuck I’m flying to a glacier.
We drone North for days, either drunk or hungover. It’s peaceful. I mean, we get in a few fights, but I don’t do a lot of thinking. It’s a nice break.
Vali’s glacier is stark and beautiful. Huge, rough hewn columns of crystal clear ice support a prismatic cavern of spectral beauty. Or, they did, before the whole thing collapsed.
“Well dang.” says Bee-12. “What happened here?”
I smell ice and alcohol, elf and ozone. Grind my teeth. I’m beginning to detect a theme.
Bee-12 offers to get help to excavate the ruin. I thank her, but I’m very small. Think I’ll just fly in through the cracks.
“That can’t be safe. What if it shifts?”
“Don’t worry. I’m more shifty than a pile of ice.”
I penetrate the ruins. Buzzing deeper and deeper. Let’s see what they were trying to hide. I reach the inner sanctum. It’s blasted to shit, but it doesn’t hide the huge spiral of runes carved on the floor. Some of it’s still legible. Vali was etching his sacred text into the ice. Casting a spell with his everything.
Fuck.
I roll one. Think. I’m out of leads to Cy. Someone’s blasting them all with lightning. That’s annoying, but is also another lead. Whoever is burning Cy’s life down knows a lot about his life. If I could catch up to them, maybe I could beat some answers loose. If I can get to Godhome. Because that’s where Vali was trying to go.
You can hack a hole to Godhome using your sacred text. I’ve never seen it, but this is what it looks like. It’s a nasty shortcut. Sure to scramble your brain. From what I’ve read of Vali, he may see that as a feature. Does me no fucking good.
Getting to Godhome with no memory would be the same as giving up. Why bother? I can just give up here in Gianthome. I’ve already got a new friend.
If I want to search Godhome, I have to go the hard way. Find my purpose. Commit. But what’s my purpose? What can I commit to?
Finding Cy? That seems desperate. Finding Tiger seems delusional. Rebuilding the Tiger Gang? That seems desperate and delusional, but close. Close to what actually drives me.
Could I be the god of hopeless causes? No. The cause may be hopeless, but I’m not. Hope’s all I’m running on. Hope and alcohol. I’m the scout that never gives up. The spy that never dies. The relentless seeker. The relentless avenger. Relentless grim death. No, that’s too far. The relentless seeker, that’s who I am.
My focused devotion burns away the haze of Gianthome. I feel properly myself - maybe for the first time. I also realize that Godhome may be a dead end. Vali was going there, his killer may have gone somewhere else. It doesn’t matter. My only lead is to Gohome, so I will search Godhome.
Reality folds sideways and I slip through. I cast my senses through a void of nothingness and catch a whiff of elf and ozone. There you are mother fucker.
I decide to go there and there I am. I find a dark elf wielding shadows and lightning. His skin is metallic and covered in runic tattoos. He’s staring down an ancient lynx-kin. Holy fuck, is that Bubbles?
“Do you know why I’m here?”
“More so than you do.”
“Then you’ll surrender?”
“Never.”
The elf smiles maniacally. “Excellent.”
They clash in an explosion of cosmic force. Dang! I bob and weave, look for an opening. Get blindsided when a naiad grabs me. She pulls me close. Whispers.
“Fly sister. Tell Cy.” She opens a portal to Darkhome.
“Tell him what?”
“Tell him you found Tiger.”
I’m hurled through the portal.
Advertisement
- In Serial8 Chapters
The Strongest Armor
(Warning: xuanhuan with gaming elements. No harem. Warnings just in case) (Warning: author is extremely lazy) Li Zimu????? lived a life like a joke, born with a joke of a name, died a joke of a death. Unbeknownst to his unfortunate existence, the god above was giggling so hard snot was coming out of his nose! Feeling this entertainme- cough poor unfortunate existence should be given a second chance, his soul was brought up and given one wish before he was to be sent off to his next life. “I don’t want to die so meaninglessly again, I want to live a proper life. I wish for the strongest armor!” Ding! Wish granted! [Schedule: 2+ Chapters a week]
8 183 - In Serial9 Chapters
Aristocratic Avenue
Andrew had a pretty simple life plan: write LitRPG fiction, make a boatload of cash, and... well, he'd figure out what he actually wanted to do with the cash once he'd gotten it. But things haven't worked out quite as he'd hoped. After dozens of failed LitRPG serial attempts and countless thousands of words written, he's found himself pushing forty and broke, living alone in a crappy apartment.But when the platform upon which he publishes his work, Aristocratic Avenue, gains sentience, he and his fellow writers suddenly finds themselves transported to a playground of its own making, a place where there are no rules except the ones the authors have imposed upon themselves through their own writing. Spawned in pods of three, they will need to work together to figure out just what the darned heck they're supposed to be doing and how to get the goodness gracious out of there.In Andrew's pod are the bossy and enigmatic Margeaux Sinclair, crossover erotica/LitRPG author who immediately demands increasingly kinky sex from the hapless Andrew in order to level up. There's also teenager Zachary, who is rather regretting his choice to write about a world populated only by the undead. Turns out, it's kinda hard to talk when your lips are rotting off.Armed only with his skills of Deduction and Investigation and an inspirational mug he managed to bring along with him from home, Andrew is determined to answer one question:What the ever-loving blessed little heart?!---This is a blow-off-steam hobby project, and I can't tell you how often it'll update as it's dependent on my regular work. But I hope you enjoy it regardless!
8 115 - In Serial19 Chapters
I'm a Bat?
Charlie Freider was an upstanding citizen.I've done literally everything a good person could ave done so why THE BLOODY HELL AM I A BAT.Charlie was born into the life of politicians, With his dad being a dirt bag member of parliament Charlie was forced into politics.Charlies is soon killed by a man who disliked his father as a member of parliament and is murdered When he opened his eyes his vision was Bat shit crazy, That is to say it was actually pretty good, and his hearing was top-notch.When he looked around Charlie found himself in a dark cave ensnared by glowing yellow eyes"Back off the lot of you, wait the hell why am i covered in fur?" (Imported from scribble hub) just to let you know the MC is not a good person and depicts insane acts
8 193 - In Serial12 Chapters
Sinner's Resolve: An Agent's Wish
A demon that had never batted an eye while mercilessly reaping the lives of many. A prodigy who accomplished the impossible. A hero that dutifully followed his orders. A messiah of the people. Many titles were given to him, whether it be in praise or in fear, but only one thing could be agreed upon by the people...All who he had ever crossed paths with had met an untimely death. He slowly rose to the top and earned himself the name of Black Death. A nameless person who was eventually awarded a cursed and bloodied name... Must this continue?...... He stared at his hands before turning his gaze towards his next three targets. Their photographs were neatly aligned along his makeshift table, accompanying him inside of a dimly lit room. Each one of them had earned their seat as the best special agents within their respective organizations. There must be a way...There has to be a way... Shaking away his thoughts, he quietly pocketed away the photos before exiting the room. A chance meeting that would forever change his cruel fate, and a wish that would transcend worlds. This is the story of a man who had nothing yet lost everything but a single wish, a silver lining that would completely change his life. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Author's Notes - Hello everyone! This is my first work and I will hopefully stay around for a while. I will try to finish or at least expand on this piece of work for quite some time, expect a few hiatuses in between though, still have a bit of schooling to do. Expected release dates will probably be once a week(not sure yet) after I stabilized the novel a bit as I'm still debating on how I should handle this. I prefer fleshed-out works compared to quick releases, but it also depends on how I'm feeling. I don't have a lot of confidence in my writing skills and I believe that my writing style is a bit weird, but I do want to try my best to tell a story that's worth telling. I will gladly accept criticism but please try to pull the punches back a bit! I'm still only human after all. Very excited to work on this, please take good care of me as I proceed on this journey with all of you! P.S. If you're going into my series, expect to see cliches sprinkled here and there. I personally love cliches and a few tropes! But, that goes without saying, I want to put my own spin on them. Be ready to feel the edge!!! Heh.
8 190 - In Serial51 Chapters
Kissing Her Scars (+18)
"𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢'𝐦 𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐫"✯✯✯"I want to kiss you so bad" he whispered huskily running his thumb over my bottom lip."What's stopping you?" I asked slowly leaning into his touch."I'm afraid once I start I won't be able to stop" he replied in a hoarse voice kissing my neck."Then don't" I mumbled gulping down the nerves.Isabella Rosa UsoroA ordinary 21 year old , but her life not so ordinaryshe is the heiress to the italy's second most richest company in Italy Roso Industriesshe lives a happy life with her parents and brother but what happens when it all goes south.Leonardo Matteo GiovanniA not so ordinary Italian Mafia bossOwns the richest company in Italy as coverup for his real buisnessKnown as the Hottest yet coldest billionaireis known to show no type of affection and has been like that since his parents murder.join the rollercoaster ride to the life of Isabella Usoro and Leonardo Giovanni full of love, betrayal,pain, anger and bloodA/N Hey guys hresha here this is my first Wattpad story so bare with me. do comment how you like my story but gonna go on a limb and say it do not fucking post any hate comments or start a fight (No offense love you guys) i guess that's it oh wait i forgot do vote and commentuntil next time Adios bitches
8 67 - In Serial18 Chapters
Bennys girl. (Benny X reader)
Y/n smalls has just moved to a new town and immediately catches the eye of Benny Rodriguez. But some things get in the way like an old friend and especially benny's ex. Will y/n and Benny get there happy ending?This is the first book I wrote, I'm very sorry that it's bad I cba to make it better
8 206

