Finally, after an eternity of sitting in the darkness and eating gross berries, something else happened.

Into the room came the man who always brings me food.

However, instead of carrying a bag of berries, he used the strange technique to put me to sleep again.

After waking up, I found myself surrounded by a group of people.

Among them was the short fat man with his gross grin.

His face seems to have been patched up.

The rest of them were humans I have never seen before.

|I didn't know what they were planning, but I knew it couldn't be anything good for me.|

One of those humans stepped forward and drew a dagger.

"Agh..."

With a light cut, my shoulder started to bleed.

It hurt, but it was nothing compared to what I had to endure before.

The human collected some of the blood into a small container before backing off.

He, along with the rest of them, then started to paint something on the floor out of my blood.

My knowledge about blood magic was minimal at the time, so I could only be baffled as strange symbols were painted around me.

"It's ready, sir."

"Good."

After his quick reply, the short man squatted down and touched the symbols.

Following that, the others squatted as well and the floor started shining.

A moment later, I began to feel something happening to me.

I couldn't quite tell what it was, but it was really uncomfortable.

It took quite some time to finish.

But when the floor finally stopped shining and the humans stood up again, something unexpected happened.

One of the humans came forward and unchained me.

At first, it confused me, but right after that, I jumped up and clawed at the man's face again.

... or at least that's what I wanted to do.

Even though there were no chains holding me down anymore, I still couldn't move.

"Looks like it was a success, sir."

After hearing that, the man's grin got even more disgusting.

He then approached me and grabbed my chin with his stinky hand.

"I made you wait a bit.

But now I can finally have some fun with you."

Every part of my body wanted to kill that man.

And the inability to do so made me want it even more.

The man then stood up and looked down on me before speaking.

"Stand up."

Finally, I was able to move.

But it was against my will.

Even though I hated the idea of listening to his commands, my body seemed to have moved on its own.

"Hehe, good..."

...

|From that day, my rage only built up without any way to release it.|

Walking, sitting and even talking.

I couldn't do anything unless the man commanded me to.

It was extremely frustrating.

Even though I was trying my hardest to resist, it just didn't work.

The man acted high and mighty at all times as well.

He treated me like a pet.

He didn't even want me to fight anything.

Every time he threw a bag of food at me and told me to eat, my desire to kill him would rise.

But I couldn't do anything.

Every time he put a collar on me, my rage skyrocketed.

But I still couldn't do anything.

I wanted to kill him.

Kill him.

KILL HIM.

I JUST WANTED TO KILL HIM.

KILL HIM.

For the longest time, that was the only thought on my mind.

But I was still powerless to resist.

Time went on.

Days, weeks, months...

I don't even know how long it took.

But Then...

Finally...

One day...

|One day, it happened.|

Almost a routine by then, the gross piece of shit picked me up from my cage.

He then nonchalantly reached into one of his drawers and pulled out a collar before throwing it down in front of me.

"Put that on your neck.

Then stand on all fours and bark like a dog."

He always told me to put the collar on myself and do something humiliating.

And I always did as he said.

But not this time.

This time I just stood and stared at the collar with bloodshot eyes.

"Hmm?

Hey what are you doing?

Put the-"

He stopped mid sentence as I felt something inside me breaking.

It was really painful, but at the same time, really liberating.

"Gh- w-wha-?!"

The target of my hatred was curling on the floor in pain.

And even though I was also in pain, I was now free.

My body moved as I wished again.

And bracelets to restrict my magic were long gone.

...

|Now, let me be clear here...|

Even MY memories are a little blurry right here.

I'm not exactly sure what happened.

All I know is that I exploded and probably tried to kill him right then and there.

But I have no idea if I succeeded.

I have no idea if I killed him or if someone came to save him.

Even if I try really hard, I just can't remember that point in time.

The next memory I can clearly remember, is me lying near a flowing river at the bottom of some canyon.

I had injuries all over my body and could barely move.

Even if I tried to squeeze out the last bits of my mana to heal myself, I knew it wouldn't be enough.

I was going to die there.

But then...

Should I call it good luck?

Or maybe it was more of a misfortune?

Either way, I heard his voice for the first time.

|And that marked the beginning of everything.|

"Hello there...

You seem like you could use some help..."

I couldn't see anyone around me.

But my vision was blurry and I couldn't move my head, so I didn't find it strange.

"How about we help each other?

What do you say?"

I didn't know whether it was another enemy or someone, who actually wanted to help me.

But either way, I couldn't move.

"If you help me with testing something, I will patch you up!

And you will also gain more power to fight whatever put you in this state!

Sounds good, right?"

Getting healed up and gaining more power?

It was a tempting offer...

"Come on now... can't you reply at least?

Oh... maybe you can't talk?

Well, how about this...

If you agree to my proposal, clench your fist!

...or something like that."

At that time, I didn't even hesitate and put the remaining strength I had into my fingers to form a fist.

Was it a mistake?

I still don't know.

"Oh!

Brilliant!

I didn't think I would find someone so soon!

Now then..."

After saying that, the owner of the voice started humming.

He seemed to be doing something, but I didn't know what it was.

"Aaand there we go."

And when he said that, my strength returned.

Even though I still had all my injuries, I no longer felt I was going to die.

And my mana was restored as well.

With that, I slowly got up and looked for the person who just helped me.

But there was nobody around.

"Alright, here's the deal!"

I heard the voice again.

But I still couldn't figure out where its owner was.

It was almost like he was speaking directly into my head.

"You will try to beat a dungeon I made from start to finish!

And don't worry about dying!

I'll make it so that if you die, you will be sent back to the start!

That way, you can have as much fun as you want with this!"

As I listened to the mysterious voice, I healed my wounds.

But the contents of his words only made me confused.

I really didnt understand what he was talking about.

"Of course, once you beat my dungeon, you will be free.

So how does that sound?"

It took a while for me to process what he said.

If I die I will be sent back to the start?

What does that even mean?

Does that mean I won't actually die?

I wasn't sure about it.

But he said I would get more powerful.

And power was what I needed.

As I was, I couldn't take on the humans all alone.

And so...

I made the biggest decision of my life.

"Deal."

...

I didn't know who I was even making the deal with...

But I would have never imagined that I actually made a deal with the god back then...

After agreeing to his conditions, something made me lose consciousness again...

...

.....

.......

I opened my eyes.

I was lying down on rocky ground staring at the ceiling.

There was a peculiar odour of mold around me.

I lifted myself up and looked around to find myself in a dome shaped rocky room with only one exit.

The room was filled with these glowing green mushrooms and there was an empty table in the corner.

I was a little hungry, but these mushrooms didn't seem safe to eat, so I headed straight for the hole leading outside of the room.

And when I got out and looked around, I was stunned.

I was in a massive cave filled with all kinds of monsters and beasts.

Little did I know it was something I would get to see over... and over... and over again.

The first creature I encountered directly was a small mouse.

It looked harmless, so I didn't pay it much attention.

But I soon learned how big of a mistake that was.

That little thing opened its mouth and out spurt some liquid.

As soon as that liquid touched me, I felt a painful burning sensation all over my body.

I realized I needed to get away from that mouse.

Even with my injuries, I ran at full speed in hopes of getting away from that monster.

But that only made me run into another monster.

This time, it was a big lizard.

I couldn't even see its movements as I lost feeling in parts of my body lower than my waist.

What happened?

Where did the lizard go?

After my body landed on the ground and I looked down, I figured out the answer.

The lizard tore me in half.

I was dying.

In a state of panic, I tried to crawl away.

But something hit my head and I blacked out...

...

.....

Only to wake up back at the dome-shaped room.

Without any injuries whatsoever.

My heart was beating at an increased rate and I was hyperventilating as I touched my waist.

It was as if nothing ever happened.

As if... I was sent back in time before that something happened.

I looked around to confirm that it was, indeed, the room I woke up in last time as well.

And I realized what the mysterious voice meant by 'you will be sent back'.

|That was the beginning of everything.|

At the start, I died a bunch of times before getting out of the big open cave into one of the smaller caves.

But those weren't any safer.

There were still a ton of dangerous monsters and strange plants.

I kept dying and trying to enter other caves.

But I never felt like I made any progress on leaving this place.

I thought I would never be able to beat this dungeon...

At some point, I found a dome-shaped rocky building similar to the one I always get sent back to.

And I found out that even the insides looked similar after I entered it.

The only difference was that the table there actually had something on it.

It was a book.

I opened it and glanced inside...

But I couldn't read any of it.

I finally found something...

And it was a useless stack of papers.

It was really disheartening...

Later, in the same 'life' I found another one of these rocky domes.

Naturally, I entered it to look what's inside.

And it was exactly the same again.

Except...

There was something on the table.

And it wasn't a useless book this time.

It was a small but sturdy dagger, that seemed to be made of iron.

A weapon.

I finally obtained a weapon.

Even something as simple as a small dagger would be useful in this place.

...

But as soon as I got out of that room, some hairy caterpillar monster snuck up on me and easily crushed me to death by coiling around my body.

...

When I woke up back at the beginning, I felt devastated that my weapon was lost.

But then... I glanced at the table in the corner.

And the dagger was there.

Along with the book.

Of course, I was confused at first, but grateful I didn't lose my weapon after all.

After another death though, I found out that the dagger would always come back with me for some reason.

Finally, things started to look up.

Finally... there was some meaning to my actions.

...

I kept trying to figure out where to go and I got a lot better and better at combat.

Which meant that I was able to survive longer and longer in the big starting cave and thus get further down into it.

I thought that was a good thing... but that was not all there was to it.

At some point, as I walked through the big cave, I heard an unsettling noise.

Something akin to an earthquake or falling rocks.

I thought the cave was collapsing.

But it was something much worse...

As the noise started getting closer, I faced the direction from which it was coming and braced myself.

But there was no way I could have been prepared for what came next.

An avalanche of rocks, was what it looked like.

But a second later, I saw these rocks had faces, limbs and wings.

Those weren't just falling rocks.

It was a horde of rocky monsters.

At that point, that was the most powerless I ever felt.

There was no way I could beat all of those on my own.

It was just over.

|I was swept up by the horde and died in mere moments.|

I opened my eyes.

I was lying down on the ground staring at the rocky ceiling.

The cold breeze brought the smell of mold to my nose.

And like that, I lied down for a while with the image of the monster horde stuck in my head.

"Impossible..."

There was some hope of beating this, but after seeing that, there was just no way.

I can't beat that.

Absolutely ridiculous, unreasonable... impossible.

This is just...

Impossible.

I kept lying down without knowing what to do.

Why did I ever agree to that deal?

This can't be done.

I can't beat that horde.

...

"Ha..haha...hahaha..HAHAHAHAHAH!"

I let out a loud laughter...

Which slowly turned into cries.

There was no hope left.

Only despair and regret.

I lied there for quite some time without moving while letting out pointless tears.

It was actually so long, that I probably starved to death and woke up in the same position.

Even after my tears dried out, I just lied there staring at the ceiling, starving to death several times.

What happened to me at that time?

I'm not certain...

|But I think I went insane.|

And I stayed like that for quite some time.

Even after finally getting up, I did some really stupid things.

I grabbed the dagger and charged at the nearest monsters, knowing I stood no chance.

I discharged all of my mana at a single mouse, knowing I would faint afterwards.

I ate raw carcasses of the monsters, knowing it would upset my stomach and make me vomit.

Why did I do these things?

I still don't know...

But it might have just helped me get tougher.

|Going through this phase might have just saved me.|

After one particular death though, things finally changed.

It was one where I was slowly eaten alive by those mice while being unable to move.

When I woke up from that, I felt calm again.

Even though my head was in disarray, I no longer had the desire to do any of these crazy things.

Instead...

I got up and looked around.

After spotting the table, I slowly headed for it.

My hand picked up the dagger held it in the palm while I looked at it.

'I had...

Enough...

Can I just...

End it myself...?'

Those were my thoughts.

My hand then gripped the dagger and jammed it into my neck.

Due to the shock, my grip on the dagger loosened for a second.

But I raised my other hand and grabbed the dagger with both of them.

Following that, a quick swipe of the dagger sideways cut my head off.

...

.....

Only to wake up lying on the ground again.

I finally realized it.

There was no escaping this.

This was something I had to do.

I had to use the fact that I go back when I die and get stronger.

Learn from my previous death and get further each life.

Once again, I got up and headed for the table and tightly gripped the dagger.

I was determined to escape now.

Nothing would stop me.

I wouldn't let anything stop me.

I glanced over at the book I found a while back.

No hope?

Nonsense.

I just have to learn how to read and this book is sure to be useful.

I just have to learn every possible movement of my enemies and think of a way to counter them.

I just have to do the impossible.

And I won't let anything stop me.

Bonus:

And the rest is history.

The forgotten memories mini-arc is over.