《How I Met Your Monster》19. Gwen, Illithid, 29

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How I Met Your Monster #19

Gwen

Profile:

Gwen, 29

Illithid

Likes: Reading, researching, music

Dislikes: Not too much. Laziness, I guess

Bio:

My name is Gwen. Don't let your preconceived notions fool you. As much as my kind enjoy focusing on collecting vast intellect and all the knowledge of the universe, I personally also enjoy seeing bands live, and cooking. Most of my free time is spent reading fiction. Let's hang out!

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Forgive the formatting differences in this next interview. I wanted to emphasize how different it was from a typical one.

Gwen met me at a concert. I was a little off put by this, but it soon made sense. The band was some local indie punk group called Kids With Beards, and the bassist was doing their best to drown out absolutely everything else. She nodded along to the music, her tendril like hair (or hair like tendrils) bouncing with her. She had a grayish purple hue to her, and was sporting a hoodie that she picked up from the merch table on the way in.

I didn't know what to do so I tried to enjoy the music. Then:

I thought you were suppose to ask me questions?"

I looked around in shock, and Gwen laughed next to me. I yelled, "Was that you?" and could hardly hear myself.

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She nodded. Yes. I can speak in your mind. Feel free to respond. As long as you don't fight it, we can communicate like this.

I tried. LIKE THIS?

She winced. Yes, but you don't have to yell.

Why did you want to meet at this concert?

I love this band. Today was the only day they were in town, and I realized I had already made this interview with you. I figured tons of dates happen at concerts, so it fits the narrative.

I had to admit, she had me there. Fair enough. You like this though? I figured someone who is so focused on the mental wouldn't enjoy such loud sounds.

I enjoy the vibration. My kind don't tend to talk aloud a great deal, but noise itself is not a problem. We just prefer conversing mentally.

Alright, well. Why are you on Unhinged?

It's a thrilling thing. When I speak to people, I can gaze on their surface thoughts. I know how they're going to respond or how they want to respond. It takes all the fun and mystery out of dating. Sure, it helps me get rid of some sleazy guys, but for the most part, talking over an app makes me feel like everyone else.

That's an interesting take on it, Gwen. Do you think other Illithids feel that way?

She started dancing to the new song being played. Absolutely. As much as we are creatures of intellect, the feeling of not knowing something is strangely exciting. We can find new ways to experience things as well as find ways to actually do the learning. We don't get that that often.

I can understand that. Knowledge is great and , but the journey to learning that knowledge can be just as exciting.

Exactly! Now you're getting it!

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We enjoyed the music for a bit. My head was starting to hurt. She explained to me that this was typical if you aren't used to conversing psychically. We walked over to the food area and I got some water and had a seat. The bass was thumping behind us, but the water was helping my brain clear up.

I think I'm better now.

Sorry about that. I looked up after Toll of the Bread and thought you were about to pass out. I'm so used to talking to my fellow Illithid that I forgot it can affect you guys differently.

It's alright. Things happen. Do you not get out to meet people too often?

She shook her head. Not only are people kind of weirded out by our looks, but very few creatures enjoy talking to someone who can skim around in their thoughts. So, I usually stick to the colony. Which is fine. We spend all day learning and then share what we learned with everyone.

Won't you eventually run out of stuff to learn?

That's the goal. To learn everything there is and to take over the universes with our superior knowledge.

That's . . . quite some goal.

Not only that, but it is incredibly obtainable. Until then though, I would love to just get out more and have some fun. I want to see the world. Visit museums. Try new food. Go to concerts. And if I had my choice, I wouldn't do it alone. You can understand that, right?

Absolutely. It's why I decided to do field work journalism. I love experiencing new things and meeting new people.

She smiled at that and we went back to the concert to enjoy the rest of the show. Gwen danced and spun, the tentacles on the bottom of her face nearly hitting people who got too close in the mosh pit. She was a force to be reckoned with when her favorite band played their hearts out on stage.

I'm going to head out. I need to write this up. Anything else you want to throw out there?

Sure! Even though you may have a responsibility, whether big or small, don't be afraid to cut loose and have some fun occasionally. What's the point of life if you're not truly living it?

I must echo that sentiment, dear readers. I am trying my best day in and day out to be more open to experiences. Since I have started this project, I have broken the routine of applying for jobs, searching for stories, and coming home to binge watch streaming services until I fall asleep. As much as I enjoy the few moments off I give myself for relaxation, it's amazing to be able to finally say that I have something to look forward to each day. To try new things. To meet new people. It's a rare thing that many take for granted, but it is the life blood that is keeping me going. Until next time.

-Silas D.

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