Chapter 4

"You do know the girls aren't going to want to leave you alone after so long apart, right?" Lena casually said whilst preparing her bag for the journey.

"What they want is, unfortunately for them, not what I'm concerned about at the moment." I somberly replied. We were approximately twenty miles from the town of Sheehan, and this would be the last town for a thousand miles where we could resupply. The girls had their own equipment to see to, and I’d be damned if I would be the reason they were using subpar equipment.

Lena finished pulling her bag strap tight, then looked up at him. "Whatever, but they’re not going to like this.”

I gave her a dry chuckle and my approximation of a shrug. “They’ll get over it. Besides, I’ll have my hands full dealing with Uriel.”

"Alright, I understand your point."

"I figured you would—"

"Yeah? Well, maybe you can explain it to me because I sure don’t understand." Ayla came out of nowhere and said in an annoyed tone. "Why is it that every time we get together, you always send us away?"

I turned my attention to her. “You know that isn't what's happening, Ayla."

"Do I? Wouldn’t be the first time you sent me away without caring about what I wanted.”

I narrowed my eye at her "Is that so?" I turned my attention to the others. "And do the rest of you think the same?" I looked at each of them individually and, to my surprise, most of them nodded in the affirmative with only Fenris replying negatively.

"You do what you do because it's what you believe to be best." He shrugged, "While most here has faith that you could protect them from just about anything, I know otherwise."

"You’re not helping, dad." Hali muttered.

Fenris rolled his eyes and looked at his daughter. "Despite your opinion of the Fatass, Hali. The fact remains true that he isn't invincible. The fact is never truer than when he's around us... Isn't that right?" Fenris asked while meeting my eyes.

"Surprisingly, Mutt. In this instance, you are correct." I admitted.

Hali and Ayla spun their heads to stare at me. "Are... Are you saying we're a burden to you?" Ayla whispered.

"No, that’s not what I’m saying."

"Sure, sounds like it. Fine, if you want us to leave, then we'll go with Lena."

"But Ayla-"

"No." Ayla interrupted her, "Father has made his decision. Let's not argue with him about it."

"Ayla is right. Arguing with Master is not the way to change his mind." Findral said quietly.

Hali looked between the two for a couple of seconds, “Fine.” She sighed. Hali and Ayla then split off from the group to prepare themselves for the journey.

"That could’ve gone better." Fenris muttered.

“Yeah,” I sighed. “What ever happened to the days when they would do as I said without throwing a fit about it?”

"Those ended the day they grew up and got engaged." Fenris snorted.

I shot Fenris a blank look and stared him down.

“What? I’m just saying you still see them as little girls, that’s all.”

"Are you trying to say you don't?" I asked.

Fenris smirked and turned his head in the direction the girls had left in. "Of course, I do. I probably always will see them as the little girls that used to beg me to race them around on my back." He admitted.

"When will the two of you get it through your heads that they aren't those little girls anymore?" Lena asked in an exasperated tone.

Me and Fenris looked at each other, then back at her. "Never." "Not in this lifetime." Was our simultaneous response.

Lena groaned and cupped her head between her hands. “I truly pity those poor girls. with you two guard dogs around, they’ll never get married." she quietly muttered, though said guard 'dogs' heard her all the same.

"Hey, I resemble that remark." I chuckled.

"Eh, you've called me worse." Fenris mumbled, then he and Lena walked off to finish their preparations, leaving me alone with my thoughts...

I am sorry for my words, girls... But... I don't know what I would do if something happened to either of you. I internally sighed. I laid my head down and closed my eyes while I waited for Uriel to arrive so we could get started. Unbidden memories of the past rapidly appeared and disappeared until I eventually dozed off.

The sound of sobbing echoed throughout a darkened inn. I followed the sound to a door across the hall from where I’d been sleeping. Lifting my hand, I tentatively knocked. “Ayla?”

The sobbing quieted down, though I could still hear the occasional sniffle through the door.

“Ayla, are you okay?” I asked quietly.

“Go away…” Her voice sounded raw, like she’d screamed it hoarse. “I’m fine, sorry for waking you.”

I pressed the button on the handle and pushed the door open. Ayla was laying on her side with her arms wrapped around her body and her knees pulled close. Her damp eyes reflected the light from the candle sitting on her end table as she stared at me… I found myself staring back. How could someone make something this pure, this innocent cry? What kind of monster did it take to cause this much grief in a little girl?

Not for the first time since coming to this world, I felt completely and utterly powerless.

I walked over and sat down beside her on the bed. “It’s okay to cry, Ayla.” I said quietly. “Everyone does.”

“You don’t.” She sucked in a breath, causing her snot filled nose to rattle.

“Of course, I do.” I told her quietly. “And for the same reasons you do.”

She was quiet for a while, but I didn’t mind. I just sat with her in the darkness. At some point, my hand had begun rubbing her back, much in the same way I’d done for my own daughters all those years ago.

“I miss her…” She cried. I didn’t need to hear the name to know who she was referring to.

My eyes snapped open and I looked around to see if anyone was nearby. Once I was satisfied, I laid my head back down. Your safety will always come first, Ayla... So long as you and Sarah live, I'll do anything to protect you... even from the monster inside of me." I looked around at the dead plants surrounding me, and the darkness that was spreading out from me as I unconsciously sucked in ambient magic. And if that means I have to keep sending you away until I learn to control this? Then that's a sacrifice I'll gladly make time and time again