《A fine octet of legs》Chapter 64 - Wheeling and Dealing
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Ixxy was getting desperate.
Since her little contractual mishap, she’d ended up only getting two potential clients and rejected both. It was not due to her one fucked up contract, though, she was totally over that. They’d just both given her a bad feeling.
The first had been a horrendously filthy man with a big, dirty, unkempt beard that had been crawling with… something. A little dirtiness could be kinky, and it wasn’t like she could catch any diseases, but she drew the line at visible lice. She told him to go get cleaned up first and, unsurprisingly, he never came back.
The second had been an ordinary labourer, likely a miner of some kind. Big, brawny, a bit rough around the edges and a face like a squashed cauliflower. Of course, his looks didn’t particularly bother her, it was just…
“… he just looked a little like him, you know? The guy who offed himself? I mean, sure, his hair was blonde and he was maybe a little taller, but you know…” she tried to explain.
Leez, for her part, appeared to be doing her best to be understanding. But it was hard. Mushy heart-to-hearts and supportive words weren’t really demons’… style.
“You can’t afford to keep turning down contracts, Ixxy,” she said.
Ixxy had run into Leez, the demoness from the bank, a few times in or around Triorbus Square during the following week. She’d shown Ixxy the places where mortals were willing to buy the concentrated Sanguine Essence that she got as summoning fees.
In exchange, Ixxy was treating her to a fruity alcoholic drink from a small brewery near the Square that did good business catering to demonic customers.
Unfortunately, while she’d managed to score a couple of the weird coppery, silvery coins this place used for money, Sanguine Essence really was dirt cheap. And souls were… not. When she’d asked Leez how much of the stuff she’d need to exchange for one soul, she’d just laughed.
“How much have you earned this week?” she asked.
Ixxy sighed. “Total? About point-seven. Would have been one-and-a-bit, enough to cover my fine at least but… you know…”
Leez frowned, making her button nose scrunch up adorably.
“How to put this gently…” she said. “Ixilis, you’re not going to be able to make rent.”
“No, it’s fine!” Ixxy protested. “I just need to hustle a bit, that’s all! I’ll make it work…”
Leez shook her head. “No, Ixilis, I mean, you only have a day left and you haven’t even paid off your fine. The average contracts are less than a quarter of a soul. You’re going to need six of them just to meet all your obligations. And getting six contracts in a single day is highly unlikely. I mean, it can probably be done, but I think you’re going to struggle just to pay off your fine, never mind your rent.”
Ixxy bit her lip. “There are bigger contracts, though, right? Better paying?”
“Sure,” Leez replied, taking a sip of her drink, “but, obviously, those are out of reach of your usual clients. You can’t pay more than a third without a Soul Account at the bank and only richer folks can really afford those.”
“And those people standing in the queue when I was there…?” Ixxy asked.
Leez shook her head. “Direct payments. We don’t do collections unless an account holder arranges it beforehand. Trust me, if they had a penny to their name they wouldn’t be there.”
“Any where would I find these ‘richer folk’?”
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“Diabolist District, mostly,” Leez replied. “It becomes less popular the further out you go in the city. Just too far to walk to the bank, I suppose.
“But, Ixxy, all the mortals who trade in souls have their regulars who they work with. They don’t just go pick out brand new devils to shower with cash. Their contracts are usually also longer term things, like complex tasks.”
“Well… I’ll figure something out,” Ixxy said dismissively, sipping on her drink.
Leez just shrugged. “Well, the worst that can happen is you end up having to go back to the Abyss. Then you can try again in a decade or two once you’ve worked off your fees.”
That was what Ixxy was afraid of. Debt.
Debt - favours owed - was the only currency of the Abyss. Who you owed and who owed you defined your entire social position. Owing someone a favour gave them a kind of power over you, just like someone owing you a favour gave you a kind of power over them. A favour could be called in at any time and you had to drop what you were doing and respond.
But these favours could linger in the Abyss for a very long time, hoarded like golden trinkets over untold eons. The problem was, demons, or their selves back in the Abyss at least, didn’t actually need anything to survive. They didn’t need to eat, drink or sleep and there certainly wasn’t any air to breathe in the Abyss.
Everything was a luxury good.
In such a place, favours could hang around for centuries. Opportunities for repayment were few and far between, and often required asking lesser favours from others in the process. Entire social hierachies were structured based purely on who owed whom and the potential of favours being called in.
Right now, Ixxy owed InferTec for the time that she’d already spent in her body. That was the rental fee. And if she went back to the Abyss now (or got recalled) that debt wouldn’t disappear.
Normally, she’d be stuck paying back the equivalent of one week’s worth of body rental - not an outrageous amount, but enough - through the odd task or request here and there. And yes, it could take as much as a decade or two to fully pay back such a debt, depending on how many opportunities that required her services came up.
In her specific case, however, it was almost guaranteed that her father would swoop in and trade a few favours to clear her debts before she’d even fully manifested. He could certainly afford it. Then she’d owe him instead. And that was not acceptable.
Not again.
“Anyway, speaking of work, I need to get back to the bank,” Leez said, sliding her empty glass across the table. Ixxy realized that she’d been so stuck in her own head, she’d completely zoned out. “Thanks for the company. If you’re still here tomorrow, I’ll see you around.”
Ixxy just gave her a half-hearted wave as Leez sashayed out the door, cheekily pinching the proprietor’s rear on her way past. He merely grunted in annoyance, clearly used to being around pleasure devils. They did make up more than half of his clientèle.
As soon as Leez was out of sight, Ixxy’s horns clinked as she dropped her forehead onto the table and groaned.
What was she going to do?
Leez was right. If she wanted to make her rent payment, she was going to to have to get lucky and get a client that was willing to pay her enough to settle both her weekly rental payment and her stupid fine, all in one go. There just wasn’t time to get enough clients at regular rates.
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“Excuze me…”
Ixxy jerked her head up, surprised to be addressed.
“I couldn’t help but hear that you have a… problem?”
Towering over her was another pleasure devil, tall and willowy with brown hair and… wait a second. She looked familiar. Where had she seen her before?
“May I have a zeat?” she asked, gesturing towards the open seat that Leez had just vacated.
Ixxy sat upright and narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “Do I know you?”
“Doez ziz ring ze bell?” the newcomer asked, grinning widely.
It clicked. The tall pleasure devil she’d run into on her first day, the one with the funny accent that had given her directions to Ruul. It was her.
“I zink I might be able to help,” she said and sat down in the open seat. “My name iz Vruzhk.”
Even when she wasn’t trying, there was still a faint accent in her voice. Ixxy guessed she really did have one after all, though not nearly as pronounced as she had pretended in the street. Maybe she’d been faking one for so long that it had stuck?
“I’m Ixxy. What kind of ‘help’ are we talking about here?” Ixxy asked carefully. It wasn’t that demons didn’t help each other. They did. All the time. But that help was never free. That was how favours were born.
Vruzhk held up a hand. “Calm down, you do not owe me for zis. I offer nothing myself. Merely an introduction with zomeone who helped me.”
Ixxy eyed her carefully. “Look, thanks, but I’m not looking to owe anyone any favours, okay? I’d rather just deal with InferTec.”
“Oh! No, no, no. No favours,” Vruzhk said, shaking her head. “Buziness! With mortals!”
Ixxy raised an inquisitive eyebrow. “Business? What kind of business?”
“What other kind of business iz there when mortals are concerned?” Vruzhk asked, shrugging. “Contracts, of course.”
“Contracts,” Ixxy repeated dubiously. “And you’d just share with me at no cost to yourself? I’m sorry, this sounds shady.”
“No, not like that,” Vruzhk replied, shaking her head. “I work for some mortals who also do contracts. With each ozer. Then they use us to execute the contracts, taking a small fee off ze top.”
“Okay…” Ixxy said slowly, “and how can this help me?”
Vruzhk grinned. “Ze business is quite cut-throat, yes? They offer very good perks, including payment up-front. Why don’t you come with me? I am on my way there now for a job. You can see for yourself,” she said getting up from the chair.
If Ixxy had been a mortal, she would have told Vruzhk to go to the Abyss. That this little ‘opportunity’ was just a bit too convenient. That this stank of an ambush.
“Sure, lead the way.”
But she wasn’t a mortal. She was a demon. After all, what was the worst that could happen?
Vruzhk led Ixxy to a fairly simple office inside a three-story magestone building deep in the Diabolist District of the city.
If she’d had anything to fear from the tight, shadowy alleys, the quiet nature of the area would have raised Ixxy’s hackles. But, honestly, she almost hoped that it was a trap. That someone was going to try and attack her.
At worst, she’d end up back at the Obsidian Gate. At best, she’d find some playmates she could extract some souls from.
Any intentional harm by a mortal to a demon outside the stipulations of a contract automatically generated a kind of ‘debtors account’ in the Grand Contract that the demon in question was then allowed to collect on. That debt never expired. All Ixxy would need was a single touch somewhere she could feel a pulse, any time in the future, and she could yoink every spare scrap of soul her attackers had up to the limit of their debt. No contract required. And this was the one deal you couldn’t bail out of.
It did not apply to demons, obviously, but Ixxy wasn’t worried about Vruzhk. She was fairly sure she could take her in a fight, and if she couldn’t… well… so what? Then she died. And popped back out the Obsidian Gate, none the worse for wear, and roaring for revenge.
That was why demons treated each other honestly, generally speaking. You don’t lie, cheat or steal from the people who were going to be around a thousand years from now, still carrying a grudge for what you’d done to them.
But mostly, you just didn’t do it out of common decency. It just wasn’t done. That was why she’d been so shocked when that bastard, Ruul, had so casually tossed her into a wall.
“Do not let the small office space fool you, the business is booming,” Vrazhk told her as they climbed the stairs to the top floor. “This is just an administrative office to handle the paperwork. Most of the work is fieldwork, canvassing for contracts and such.”
Ixxy just nodded. Truthfully, she still wasn’t quite sure what these mortals were doing exactly, nor how it was going to help her situation. Hopefully she wasn’t wasting her time.
That hope seemed to be a bit dashed as they stepped into what had to be the reception area. The place was… bare. A small plaque on the door indicated that this was the offices of ‘Mulder & Heath, Incorporated’, but inside, there was just a single counter, staffed by a harried, middle-agedm human woman looking over several thick stacks of paper. The only other furniture was a few uncomfortable-looking chairs pushed into the corners of the room.
The walls were completely barren of any decoration or any other attempt to make the place more homely. Just plain, black magestone. Compared to Sazka’s office, this place was downright spartan.
The woman looked up as they entered. “Oh, hello Vruzhk,” she greeted, smiling. “I see you’ve brought in another stray.”
“Do not for one minute pretend you do not ztart counting the money the moment I do, Marget,” Vruzhk responded, smiling back at her. “Zis is Ixxy. She is curious about what it is you do here.”
Ixxy gave Vruzhk a brief, curious look. By telling her that the company was going to make money off of her, Vruzhk had revealed that she was negotiating from a position of value. At the same time, she’d not revealed any of Ixxy’s problems. It would have put Ixxy in a much weaker position if the woman knew in just what dire straights she were.
Was Vruzhk doing this intentionally? If so, that would mean Ixxy might owe her for it. But Vruzhk did not meet her gaze or give any other indication of it. She’d expected a knowing look or smirk or something, at the very least. She would have to ask her later.
“Well, sure,” the woman replied, smiling as she dug through a storage rack under her desk. “I’ll give her the same pitch we give all the new girls and she can see if she’s interested. Ixxy, is that right?”
“Yes, that’s right. Hello, er…” Ixxy greeted awkwardly. She still wasn’t exactly sure what was going on or who the mortal lady was.
“Marget Mulder. But you can just call me Marget, dear,” the woman instructed. “We don’t really stand on ceremony here. Please, grab a seat, both of you. I just need to find the intro package somewhere in this mess. Just give me a moment.”
“Right here? In the reception?” Ixxy asked curiously. Presumably there were actual offices through the door on the left wall. It seemed a little strange to just sit down in front of the reception desk.
“Hmm? Oh! Yes, my regular girl quit. Couldn’t handle all the demons traipsing through, I’m afraid. Poor, superstitious, little thing,” Marget explained. “And now it’s just easier to do my work here, where I can handle the people that arrive myself. We don’t get that many, honestly.”
As she and Vruzhk dragged the chairs closer, Ixxy took the time to study the woman. She was a little homely, the typical indicator of an inactive lifestyle in mortals and her face had several lines betraying her age, despite her best attempts with make-up. While she was dressed professionally, her outfit seemed a little worn, as if it were a tad old.
She also seemed very unphased at dealing with not one but two devils at the same time, though Vruzhk seemed content to sit in her chair and inspect her nails. Most mortals became visibly antsy and nervous when dealing with her, in Ixxy’s experience.
“You seem pretty comfortable with us here,” Ixxy remarked, settling into her chair. It was as uncomfortable as it’d looked.
“Twenty years at the Diabolist Institute, Dear,” Marget replied. “In my time, I’ve had to negotiate with things that would make a zombie’s skin crawl. Two pretty faces like yours are actually a nice change.” She looked up, giving Ixxy another beaming smile.
“Why’d you leave?” Ixxy asked. “I assume this operation is independent from the Institute, or we would be having this discussion in the big building up the road, right?”
“Yes, you’re quite right. We have nothing to do with the Institute,” Marget replied without looking up. “It’s not really important why I left, though. Just a difference of opinion. Ah! Here it is!”
She straightened up in her seat and placed a big, leather file on the counter between them, before flipping it open.
“So what we do here at Mulder & Heath,” she started her spiel, handing Ixxy a thick pack of papers, “is we connect mortals desiring certain services with suitable, compatible ladies such as yourself and Vruzhk.”
“You mean pleasure devils,” Ixxy stated, paging through what turned out to mostly be a contract.
“Yes, exactly,” Marget replied. “Not because we are incapable of handling others, we have simply chosen to specialize, right? As it is, we can barely keep up with demand.”
Ixxy raised an inquisitive eyebrow. “Demand?” Not in her experience. Demand wasn’t that high. Too many pleasure devils sucking at the city’s teat and not enough horny males willing to part with a bit of soul in exchange for a bit of fun.
Marget gave her another big smile. She had good teeth, which seemed to indicate a wealthier upbringing.
“Indeed, Dear. You would be surprised by how much more amenable people are to such arrangements when their point of contact is another of their own kind. Plus, we do a bit of advertising as well, which helps convince the ones who hesitate.”
“It is not impossible that businesses like zis are the reason we struggle so much to find our own contracts these days,” Vruzhka added. “They’re scooping up all our clients.”
“I’m still not quite sure I follow,” Ixxy said, frowning. “How does this differ from what Sazka does? She also matches us up with prospective clients…”
“Pff. Sazka only deals with requests through the summoning network,” Vruzhka interjected dismissively. “You have any idea how zlow and expensive those are to mortals? Every time they must wait until Sazka finds one of us to pass their contract to. And mortals these days have no patience.”
“Indeed,” Marget added. “Our market research has shown that over seventy-three percent of respondents who said that they had considered contracting with a pleasure devil had not done so because they were put off by the complexity and cost of obtaining and using a summoning plate, despite the so-called ‘convenience’.”
As Marget quickly explained the offering to Ixxy, she followed in the contract and the deal started to become clear. The company would sign her as a kind of ‘sub-contractor’. They would then pass contracts to her as they received requests that fit her ‘profile’, which would be a combination of her own expressed preferences as well as her experience history. Clients would then be able to rate her according to a rating system that would further inform her’s profile and help the company match her to clients. And so on and so forth.
All of the work obtaining clients, screening clients, advertising and setting up the contracts would be taken care of by Mulder & Heath, Inc. All Ixxy had to do, was payment and… ahem… execution. Sure, the company took a cut, but since she could just pick what she charged the mortals, she could just add that cut to the costs on the mortal’s side. It would have zero impact on Ixxy’s earnings. She could also choose not accept a contract - Ixxy checked - if she did not feel comfortable with them or felt that a fair price was not possible.
Of course, none of that really helped Ixxy in any way. Her problem was still that she needed a full soul by the next day or InferTec was going to yank her body, open contracts be damned.
But, right at the end of the contract, a particularly interesting clause came up.
“Finally, due to how we partition out clients, it can happen that one of our girls just happen not to get any work in a week,” Marget explained. “And at Mulder & Heath, we understand that that can be a problem since you have expenses of your own.”
Ixxy caught Vruzhk giving her a meaningful wink.
“Now, many of our clients get quite upset if their favourite girl just disappears suddenly, so we’ve started piloting an ‘upkeep’ program in the last few months,” Margot explained. “That means, if, for whatever reason, you don’t make enough from our during a week to pay your fees, Mulder & Heath will provide you with a forwarded payment of one soul to cover your expenses.”
Ixxy’s eyes widened, and she had to focus to keep her face calm and expressionless as she read the wording of the clause.
“I feel I need to stress, however, that this is just a forwarded payment. Almost like a loan. We will be subtracting it from all of your future earnings until it’s paid back,” Marget cautioned.
This was what Vruzhk had been trying to tell her. They had made a mistake. They hadn’t realized how exploitable this was.
If Ixxy just refused all of their contracts, they would still be on the hook for one soul a week. Forever. Or at least until they terminated the contract, in which case she would be no worse off than if she had never signed it.
“So that’s it,” Margor finished, smiling. “You can go look over the contract at home or… wherever and come back tomorrow if you’re interested.”
Tomorrow? Ixxy didn’t have time to wait until tomorrow.
“Could I come by later, instead?” she asked.
“Later?” Marget shook her head. “I’m afraid not, dear. I was already getting ready to pack up when you arrived. I’m running late as it is. Why don’t you come by tomorrow instead? I’m sure you will want to have a nice, thorough look through that contract.”
“Can I just ask one question, then, before you go?” Ixxy asked, trying to buy herself some time.
“Of course, dear. What can I help you with?” Marget answered, already starting to gather her things.
“This clause over here. The non-compete one. What is that about?” Ixxy asked. It was the one clause Marget hadn’t made a mention of as they’d gone through the contract.
‘During the term of the Agreement, the Contractee shall not, directly or indirectly, in any manner whatsoever, engage in any capacity with any other contracting or contract management entity for the Contractee’s own benefit or for the benefit of any person or entity other than the Company, as defined…’
“Oh, you don’t have to worry about that one too much, dear,” Marget replied dismissively. “It’s just to stop you signing contracts with other companies like ours. You know, protecting our business. Competition is cut-throat, right?” she laughed.
“Haha, right!” Ixxy replied, smiling. That made sense. Sorta.
Marget finished gathering her things, packing them away in a leather sling-bag. Shit. Ixxy was out of time. It was now or never. She’d had gone through the contract as Marget had been speaking, and it looked fine, but she hadn’t really had time to properly study it. Her instincts rebelled against the idea of signing anything that she hadn’t looked at in-depth, but she literally did not have time.
She glanced over towards Vruzhk, who gave her an almost imperceptible nod.
Right. That settled it. Vruzhk had to have studied her own contract in proper depth, right? She could trust her, at least not to screw her over in favour of a mortal. So what if she absolutely owed her for this now? It’s not like she had another choice anyway, right?
“Wait, I’ll take it,” Ixxy spoke up just as Marget was about to get to her feet.
“I’m sorry, dear?” she asked.
“The contract. I’ll sign it,” Ixxy said.
“Oh!” Marget exclaimed, setting her bag back down and reaching for a pen. “I’m so glad you feel that way! But are you certain? One day won’t make much of a difference on our side. I mean, we probably won’t have your paperwork done to send you contracts before tomorrow anyway…”
“Nevertheless, I want to sign it. Right now,” Ixxy insisted, taking the pen. “It’s immediately in effect, right?”
“In theory, yes…”
“Good!” Ixxy quickly signed her name at the bottom of her contract and handed it back. “And done.”
“Wonderful!” Marget exclaimed, signing her own section. “It has been a pleasure doing business with you, Ixxy.”
“Just one last thing,” Ixxy said as Marget made to leave again. “How do I collect on the upkeep clause?”
“Hmm? Oh, we don’t have a system in place for that yet, dear. You can just tell me when if you’re reaching the end of your week and I’ll give you a note for the bank.”
“Well,” Ixxy said, grinning, “I’ve reached the end of my week. Could you give me that note?”
Marget blinked. “Already? But…”
“I’m sorry,” Ixxy replied, grinning, “but you did sign the contract.”
Once they finally got back downstairs and out of the building, Ixxy turned to Vrazhk.
“So, what do I owe you?” she asked, fingering the letter of credit Marget had given her.
Vrazhk shook her head. “Nothing. Zometimes, us demons just need to stick together.”
“I don’t buy it,” Ixxy replied, pursing her lips. “You sent me hints on the negotiation, you pointed out the market position of these guys and you saved me the time of reading the damned contract. I owe you. The only question is, ‘how much?’ And don’t say ‘nothing’. It’s insulting.”
Vrazhk sighed. “Very well. But it is zo very hard to judge the real value of these things before they have had a chance to pan out, yes? Perhaps let us wait a month and see how they go?”
Ixxy scowled. She didn’t like that idea. It meant the better things went, the more she was going to owe Vrazhk. But it wasn’t an unfair request, so…
“Fine. We will determine the value a month from now,” she conceded.
Hopefully Vrazhk would accept souls in payment.
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