“I am...”

-Last words

***Outer Rim***

***Veronica***

“Don’t worry, Dad. There will surely be a chance to assassinate Ouluk. No need to blow up Potemkin.”

I freeze up upon hearing a name I almost had forgotten. Ouluk is on Potemkin? That’s why Dad freaked out? But he should be safe at our homeworld after surviving the space station’s destruction. Why did he join the crusade, that idiot!

With my mind still in turmoil, I watch my mothers tying up Antioch with his own belt.

I ask, “What did Ouluk do? For Dad to freak out like that, it must be serious.”

Silith looks up and smiles. “Oh, don’t worry, Honey. He is just throwing a tantrum. Ouluk was the researcher who was in charge of Antioch and his brothers. Dad is giving Ouluk the fault for killing those who Antioch regarded as his true family. I am sure that he will thank us for reigning him in when he regains control over his impulses.”

Fiona looks up from where she is still straddling Antioch’s leg. The busty cat-demoness notices my wide-eyed expression and tries to comfort me. “Silith isn’t lying. Antioch’s impulse control is a little loose when it comes to Ouluk. From what I understand, he regarded him as a father figure up until Ouluk tried to kill your dad.”

I smile, but only with my mouth. Everyone can see that I am doing it for their sake. To reassure them, because right now I am more afraid than ever of Lisandra’s, Mom’s, reaction to learning about my origin.

How am I ever going to tell her? Will she react in a similar manner as Antioch? I basically did the same thing to her!

That’s when Antioch manages to push Silith off his face. “Stop! Just Stop! I give up!”

“You won’t blow up Potemkin?” Silith asks. “You have to swear!”

“I won’t blow up Potemkin. I swear! Just stop this sexual harassment!”

“Oh, you are one to complain!” Silith slaps Antioch lightly on his cheek. “Going nuts like that. It won’t be easy to make up for that.”

I look away from their friendly banter, especially since Lisandra and Fiona are now joining in on the game. Even though I watched their strange relationship for my entire life, I don’t know how they do it. I’ve never understood how Lisandra and Fiona can be lovers, while joining in on Antioch’s and Silith’s relationship. Maybe it’s better if I just don’t think about it.

Clearing my throat, I try to gain their attention. “Is there anything else? Or can I go now?”

“I think we can go,” Jill touches my shoulder and gently guides me towards the door while the adults are busy with... adult stuff.

“Yes,” I reply and knead my hands in front of my belly, trying to untie the knot of contradictory feelings within me. After spending years with the humans, as a human, I almost feel like one of them. Yet, there is also this old memory of another time firmly lodged in the back of my mind. Of a time when the purpose of my very existence was finding ways to exploit those who I regard as my family now.

Seeing it from a strictly logical point of view, there shouldn't be any reason to feel like a traitor, a spy who is deceiving those who trust her. I didn't place myself in this position. I didn't actively seek to infiltrate the leadership of a human faction. Neither have I done anything to harm them since I began my new existence. So there shouldn't be any reason to feel bad about it.

But that's exactly how I feel about the situation. It feels like I am betraying those who should have my complete loyalty.

Trying hard to smile, I turn to face my sister. “Jill, do you want to watch the progress of the war with the Myriad? I want to know what's going on and the adults don't tell me much.”

Jill hums and scratches her chin while she studies me. It takes a few seemingly endless moments for her to make a decision. “Why not?”

We make our way to her room with Jill leading the way. At our destination, she waves me in, where I sit down on the empty floor with my knees pulled up to my chest. Jill gets right to work with activating her creation. At first, I ask myself what's taking so long, but then I realize that she is probably setting the Myriad up to display the information in a manner which makes sense to me.

She already explained that the Myriad is her way of busying her inhuman side. It's likely that she never intended to use the Myriad just as a simple spying tool on our dear Uncle Martin.

“That's it.” Jill makes a final adjustment, touching a seemingly random spot on the wall. Like when she used it to spy on Martin, the wall changes, but this time the effect spreads and takes over the entire room.

After spending a lot of time in virtual realities, I got used to strange, unexplainable things, but it's still disorienting to see something that shouldn't be possible in the real world. The rippling effect of shifting tiles finally stops and I find myself sitting inside a three-dimensional representation of the surrounding area.

Waving a hand, Jill changes our perspective so that we get a good look at the starcluster in which the action takes place.

My sister shoves her hands into the pockets of her dress, a red, frilly piece which clings to the contours of her body. It's in contradiction to my blue, saggy training suit, which I prefer because of the comfortability. Mom is always trying to get me to dress up, but up until now, I did my best to avoid the fate of being her dress-up doll.

“It's real-time!” Jill proclaims in a proud manner.

“You are a genius!” I whisper as I watch a map of the surrounding area. “Are we the blue bubble?”

“Yes.” Jill points out a deformed, blue area which covers several dozen lightyears. “We are currently spread out over two hundred and forty-nine star systems. Our forces are spread thin, and we command only a few mentionable battle-groups. But that's to be expected. Martin and Antioch are trying to start up as many different colonies as possible. The intention is to get enough operations going to reach a critical mass of expansion.”

She kindly continues the explanation, because to me there are just three spheres of influence which are rubbing against each other.

“The red, much larger sphere belongs to the Cyber. This is just one of their many hidden clusters throughout the galaxy. Up until now, they managed to stay hidden and to elude the G.S.'s attention. Though I imagine that that would have changed soon anyway. They are approaching the critical mass at which the likelihood of being discovered, for one reason or the other, becomes one hundred percent.

“Our military fought a few battles with them, but nothing major. So far, we just stabbed at each other to test our abilities and the level of technology. Although it's clear that they are getting interested in us. They moved several capital ships into a position which enables them to strike deep into our territory, though territory is a very loose term in this scenario.”

I furrow my forehead. “Why?” It's like I am a student who is listening to her teacher.

Jill moves her hand, interacting with the Myriad, and the bubbles move in a way which makes it obvious that I am looking at a time lapse. “The Cyber are trying to push us into action, but so far we've abandoned most systems they invaded. It helps that our civilisation isn't based on any planets. We've only fought for a few resource-rich locations, or in one case, where we had a half-finished colony asteroid which needed some time to get its engines up and running.”

So in other words, we are slowly moving our expansion away from the Cyber who are trying to fight a serious war with us while we are trying to grab as much land as possible in hopes that some locations stay undiscovered for long enough to build a few ships and a space-based industry.

Jill points at another bubble which is much smaller. “The orange bubble shows us the G.S. expansion efforts. They are concentrating all their forces in a single, resource-rich system. It's their usual behaviour for setting up a crusade. First, they fortify one system to the limits of their ability, while they send out scouting missions in all directions. They build up their industry to ensure that they always have a sufficient flow of supplies.

“I gathered that the negotiations with them are going well. They aren't entirely sold on our story, but it seems like our father's ploy is working out. Had they been faced only with us, we would have suffered their suspicions and their full scrutiny. But as it stands, the Cyber pulled enough attention away from us. For the time being, the G.S. will ignore us and I expect them to soon launch an all-out attack at Cyber systems.”

“That's good, isn't it? I mean, their forces are spread out after chasing us. They will be surprised if an unexpected enemy opens a new war front,” I mumble. The orange bubble may be smaller, but it touches ours and will overlap with Cyber territory soon. All it will take is a few more lightyears of expansion.

Jill turns her attention away from the map and looks at me with an incredulous expression. “Could it be that you are trying to distract yourself?”

“Distract?” I ask, not looking at Jill.

“You are trying to avoid the matter of your origin. Instead of facing your social troubles with Lisandra, you are here, studying ethereal data with me.” She tilts her head, looking down at me. “That's not why I brought you here.”

“I have no idea what you are talking about, Jill. Are you going nutso?” I look up at her, trying hard not to betray my feelings.

“I have decided. You have to talk to your mother about your circumstances. It's the human thing to do.”

Oh, for fucks sake! No! Sometimes I really would like to know what's going through her head. She just made a complete one hundred eighty on this subject. “Could you explain a bit more about our situation?”

“Are you trying to ignore me?”

“I just find Myriad so interesting. Are you sure that the principles behind it are too complicated for me?”

“Yes. I am going to get Lisandra.”

I launch myself forward just as Jill turns towards the door. “Don't do it! Don't do it! You promised!” Hugging her thighs, I hold her back. If she snitches on me, everything is over.

She stops, but something tells me that she didn't change her opinion on the matter. “You have to tell her.”

“I can't! She will kill me!”

“Don't be over-dramatic. You will revive.”

“Our relationship will be destroyed. It will be awkward!”

That makes Jill pause. “Then you have to find a way to ease her into the revelation.”

“There is none!” I reply quickly.

“Of course. There is always a way.” Jill nods and looks at the ceiling. “You would need more mental fortitude and to secure the assistance of other family members. It will be much easier if you have backers, people who stand in for you when the time comes.” She looks down at me. “Have you ever tried to suck up to our Dad? If you manage to get him on your side, there wouldn't be much of a problem.”

That takes me by surprise. “How can I? He is so busy with his work. I mean, I don't feel neglected, but he is busy all day long most of the time.”

My sister smiles, showing her teeth and uses her tail to whip my side playfully. “Aren't you the infamous scientist who broke the encryption on the V.C.'s nano-tech? The one who reprogrammed our nano-machines to work in her alien body? Guess what Antioch is working on so diligently in his free time. You could become his personal assistant. Besides, it's time for you to take some responsibility and grow up.”