《Homicidal Aliens are Invading and All I Got is This Stat Menu》01.05.11

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Anya landed back in Trafalgar Square to the sounds of crying, screaming, and distant sirens. Chell was still unconscious, and Li Qiu cradled her head in her lap. Mona was directing her undead army clear the nearby roads of any wrecked cars, being mindful of the injured. Kemuel was off somewhere, doing the same and rushing anybody capable of being carried to the nearest hospitals. Renn had one hand on Chell’s forehead when Anya touched down beside them. As soon as she did, Reggie flew over to her and draped himself across her shoulders.

“How is she?” Anya asked.

“She’ll live, but she took a big hit,” Renn replied. “I’ve done what I can but she’ll need time to recover.”

“Felix, contact Samaira,” Anya said.

“You got it!” Felix said and Samaira appeared in a tiny box in front of her.

“Anya. Are you all right? Are the other hosts okay? And the people of London?” Samaira asked.

“Chell is unconscious but Renn thinks she’ll be okay. London looks like it will have a shitload of injuries but hopefully not too many dead,” Anya said and frowned. It should have been zero dead. Some part of her mind tried to rationalize that considering they had just fought the strongest alien——and won——and London was still in one piece that it was all good news. But she saw several lifeless, immobile bodies lying on the cold cement of the square.

“And you?” Samaira asked.

“Unhurt,” Anya said. “And Omega’s a hundred percent dead. Felix got the final data stream and is decoding it now. How long will that take, Felix?”

“This one’s different than the others. It’s a lot bigger, probably because Omega went into space for a while, and it’s more complex. It’ll take a full day, maybe more. Sorry about that!” Felix said.

“That’s okay, Felix,” Anya said.

“Did she say Omega’s dead?” MacDougal asked in the background. She leaned into frame and squinted at Anya.

“Yes, Director, I killed it. Felix confirmed the death,” Anya said.

“And no tricks like the thing with Immonen?” MacDougal asked.

“If you’re asking if it’s mind-controlling me, the answer is no.”

“Isn’t that what somebody being mind-controlled would say?” Ramierez asked off-camera.

“I can confirm it later,” Renn said as he stood up and peered over Anya’s shoulder.

“I can do a full scan at the containment facility too, if you really wanna waste your time,” Gary said.

“I hardly think confirming the safety of the planet after what happened with Dr. Immonen is a waste of time,” MacDougal said.

“How was it kid? Did it put up a fight?” Gary asked.

“No. No, it didn’t. It had shaped itself to do this one thing, just control ordinary people and block attacks from the front. It wasn’t even a fight, really,” Anya said.

“Huh,” Gary said.

“That’s…puzzling,” Renn added.

“After everything, Omega didn’t fight back?” Samaira asked.

“Well I had Renn shielding my brain the whole time, so I didn’t notice anything, but no, it just kinda looked at me and then I smashed it,” Anya replied with a shrug.

“It would explain its power,” Renn said. “Making people stop moving or turning them aggressive is child’s play compared to total dominion, but over a city-wide scale it would still take massive ability. If it put all of its focus into a single trick, it could do it with relative ease, but then…yes, it’d be useless in a straight up fight.”

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“I’ve already sent every medical bot and construction droid I have to help the injured and clear the roads or set up temporary medical areas,” Gary said.

“Please tell Geralissimo Huang to send the first-aid robots as well,” Li Qiu said as she continued to hold Chell.

“Will do,” Gary said and moved out of the frame.

“Hey, did I hear that? The last alien is dead?” President Hanover asked behind Samaira.

“Yes, Mr. President,” MacDougal said.

“This is gonna be great for my approval rating,” he said and wandered away.

“I’m on my way with Yai and some other hosts to help with the injured and to secure the area,” Samaira said. “Just do what you can until we get there.”

“Aye aye, Captain,” Anya said and closed the comms window.

“We really did it, hey?” Mona asked and put her hands on her hips. “Beat the bastards top to bottom!”

“Doesn’t feel like it,” Anya said as she looked at the masses of injured around Trafalgar Square.

“I agree it’s too early to celebrate, but we saved most of these people, and the world, from a far worse fate,” Renn said.

“Yeah,” Anya sighed, then walked away from the other hosts to go and see how she could help the wounded.

It was past midnight by the time Anya allowed herself a moment to rest. She had spent the day carrying the injured to hospitals or the medical structures Gary’s droids had set up, or clearing roadways for emergency vehicles. Gary had also set up a number of those pre-fab igloo things for hosts and government officials on the edge of London and Anya was sharing one with Mona.

The British woman was there when she arrived, watching a widescreen TV set into the wall and reclining in her bed while a pair of skeletons fanned her and another pair knelt beside the bed holding a bucket full of ice and a champagne bottle and a tray of fruits and meats and cheeses.

“You look comfy,” Anya said. She had only ever seen Mona in her cloak and armor, but now she was dressed in a silk robe and nothing else by the look of it.

“It’s been a bit of a day, hasn’t it?” Mona asked and raised a champagne flute to Anya. “Cheers on the victory though.”

“Hmm,” Anya grumbled and went into the tiny bathroom to shower and change out of her armor.

“News channels across the world are losing their minds. Earth is victorious, alien invasion repelled, London saved, all that business,” Mona said. “There’s a party going on in every major city on the planet. Probably causing more destruction than Omega did.”

“What’s the death toll?” Anya asked.

“For the parties?”

“No, for London.”

“Oh. Not much. A few hundred?” Mona asked as Anya stepped under the shower. She had closed the bathroom door but could still hear Mona and the television just fine.

“A few hundred people,” Anya said and thumped her head against the side of the shower stall.

“Are you getting twisted up about that? That’s nothing next to the eight million something people still living here thanks to us,” Mona said. “Hardly a fraction of a fraction of a percent.”

“That’s kind of a cold way of looking at it, don’t you think?” Anya asked. “Just raw numbers. Going up or going down. Those were somebody’s moms or dads or kids.”

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There were a few beats of silence from outside before Mona said, “Believe me, I know what death means. I didn’t just choose to raise them for shits and giggles. I’m not trying to be flippant, but I’m not going to mope because I’m not perfect, either. You killed the last alien, you saved a planet. Not every day you get to do that.”

“Yeah,” Anya said and sighed.

“So stop trying to be Miss Perfect and come have a drink with me when you’re done in there,” Mona said. Anya finished washing up and emerged in a t-shirt and sweatpants and one of Mona’s skeletons offered her a champagne flute, which she took.

Mona hadn’t been exaggerating. The news showed a montage of Manhattan, Tokyo, Moscow, Rio, Beijing, Sydney, Cape Town, Cairo, Paris, Nassau, Toronto, and more, all from various times throughout the day, all full of crowds or impromptu parades. World leaders made statements confirming the death of the final alien, congratulating the hosts and pledging support to all those cities damaged by alien attacks.

Anya couldn’t stop to think what she might have done better, if given a second chance, how she might have saved more people, done less property damage, been smarter. But watching the many celebrations across the globe brought a smile to her face.

“There we are,” Mona said and grinned at her. “Not such a mope after all.”

There was a ding from the front door as somebody rang the bell.

“Open,” Anya said. Each of the private housing units had been set to recognize basic vocal commands from the inhabitants. The doors hissed open and Samaira, Gary, Pan, and Renn entered.

“Geez!” Anya said and scrambled for something to cover herself with. It wasn’t like her PJs were revealing but she felt like a bit of a slob with so many people suddenly coming in. She settled on throwing a sheet over her shoulders and chest like a shawl.

Mona had no such problem, and stood up and walked across the room to embrace Renn, showing a fair amount of cleavage and leg along the way. Renn hugged her back while Gary cleared his throat and looked away.

“What’s up?” Anya asked.

“Just wanted to swing by and congratulate you on ridding Earth of alien invaders,” Gary said. “Y’know, the usual.”

“MacDougal was talking about some kind of award ceremony for us later this week,” Samaira said. “Sounded like a real hero’s welcome.”

“I imagine most of the hosts that joined with their governments will have something similar to look forward to,” Renn said.

“Which unit are you staying in?” Mona asked Renn with an obvious husky undertone. “My temporary roommate is a bit hesitant to celebrate with me but I was hoping you’d be up for something.”

“I’m with Francis, and sorry, but the day’s events have taken a bit of a toll on me, so I’ll have to say that we wait until the clean-up has passed.”

“Ah! Rejected!,” Mona said and gave an overly theatric sigh and fell backward, had a pair of skeletons catch her and carry her back to her bed where she resumed drinking.

“Désolé ma petite chouette,” Renn said and bowed his head.

“You keep that silver tongue to yourself for now unless——”

“Anyway!” Samaira interjected. “We all just wanted to update you, and see how the translation was going with Felix.”

“I’d definitely like some updates,” Renn said.

“You could at least come and relax a little,” Mona said to him and one of her skeletons started pushing him toward the bed. He sighed, took off his helmet, and sat beside her. Anya was a little surprised again at how normal Renn looked. Fair skin, dark eyes, dark blond or light brown hair, and a face that was pleasant enough if not uniquely handsome or striking. He smiled at Mona and she tucked some of his shaggy hair behind his ear as they spoke quietly to one another.

You look like fucking supervillains, Anya had said when she’d first met them in Beijing. And in truth, they had, and still did, a little. But more than that, just then, they looked like nothing more than a pair of young lovers after a long day at work.

“So? Felix?” Samaira asked.

“Uh, right. Sorry. Felix? C’mon out and give us an update,” Anya said.

“I got all the global positioning data for Omega done, plus the stuff when it was out in space,” Felix said and brought up a new map that showed the Earth and the Moon. Omega’s red dot moved around in the sky, hovering over each one of the cities that had suffered losses. If she had any suspicions about Renn’s involvement in the psychic attacks, this dispelled them. The signal ended precisely when her orange dot appeared over Earth and ran into Omega’s dot.

“So that’s it, then,” Anya said with a sigh.

“Not quite,” Felix said. “There was something else in the signal, I’m still working on it but it should be done soon.”

“So now that the aliens are gone, we can relax, right?” Pan asked.

“Well, I wouldn’t say we should relax just yet, but it’s definitely worth taking a little while to congratulate ourselves,” Samaira said. “President Hanover was talking about a parade or something.”

Anya grimaced and shook her head. “I dunno about that.”

“Stop being such a wet blanket! Christ!” Mona said and threw a pillow at Anya. “Even your uptight captain and the armadillo look like they’re up for a bit of a party.”

“I am not uptight!” Samaira said.

“I’m not an arma…ardma…I’m Pan!” Pan said, and Mona proceeded to tease the both of them.

“Something wrong, kid? It was a definite win today,” Gary said.

“Maybe I’m just a little hesitant after Hawaii and Riley not making it but…people still died today. And loads of people were hurt. Chell almost died, Garreth is still out of it…” Anya said and started to continue before Gary put one of his rough, calloused hands on her shoulder.

“Anya,” he said. “It was a war. People die in war, and it’s always terrible. But this wasn’t like Nam, or most of the wars men have fought. This was for pure survival, an actual Us vs. Them scenario. The people that didn’t make it, from those two on the beach when Sam and I killed our first alien to tonight, they didn’t die for nothing. And you, you helped make those sacrifices mean something. We lost some, but we saved a helluva lot more. And you more than most threw yourself into the shit. I’m really proud of you, okay? For whatever that’s worth.”

Gary smiled at her, making the wrinkles at the edges of his eyes bunch up and his thick, gray mustache curve. Anya’s eyes stung a bit and she hugged him. Gary froze for an instant, then put his burly arms around her and patted her twice on her back.

“You did real good, kid,” he said.

“Thank you,” Anya said and then released him.

“Can I get a hug too?” Mona asked.

“Not unless you put on some clothes first,” Gary replied.

“Are we hugging now?” Pan asked. “I like those.”

“All done!” Felix said and floated to the center of the room. “There wasn’t much else to translate, but it was the first time I had this kind of data to sift through, so it took longer than usual.”

“Let’s see it then. More map data?” Anya asked.

“Kinda!” Felix replied and projected Anya’s menu onto an entire wall of the pre-fab dorm. Earth was highlighted as little more than a speck on the far left side of the wall, while two other things were highlighted on the right.

“Whoa,” Anya said.

“The distance isn’t entirely to scale, but it’s still enough to give you the basic idea,” Felix said. One of the specks on the right side of the map was labeled “MARS,” while the other one was simply marked “ASTEROID.” Letters formed into words below these, followed by numbers.

“Oh. Oh god,” Samaira said.

“Fuck me,” Mona added.

Gary sighed.

Anya’s throat constricted the scream of fury and terror that welled up within her.

“I can’t read good,” Pan said.

Anya read the six terrible words Alien Omega had included in its data stream and the ticking numbers below them.

RECON WAVE: COMPLETE

ASSAULT WAVE: INCOMING

1:2:17:38:17

1:2:17:38:16

1:2:17:38:15

1:2:17:38:14

ARC 01.Invasion//VOLUME 05. Alien Omega//END

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