Chapter Eighty-Four: ‘With thy shroud, endure...’

As she stared into the mirror, Emiliana tried not to hate what she saw. She hadn’t been confident in her looks even before growing horns in the middle of her face and losing some of the vision in her left eye.

Chergoa and Shenado kept telling her that this mutation ability wasn’t as bad as it seemed. Emiliana did not believe them, frankly. And she wanted to say as much to their faces, too. She wanted to argue and complain and even throw a tantrum like a child. But she never could quite bring herself to. Each time the anger welled up, heating her face and chest with irritation, something in the back of her mind always got in the way. It felt like a pit, dark and endless, and it swallowed her every feeling, good or bad.

She knew what the pit was. There was only one thing it could be. A wound, without a doubt. Still so fresh that hardly anything else even seemed to matter by comparison.

Before leaving the bathroom, she put her mask back on. Essentially, it was just a simple, jet black plate, convexly curved so that it didn’t require an indentation for her nose and bearing two long, flat slits for her eyes. Along with her dark gray hoodie, she’d taken to wearing it wherever she went, sometimes even when sleeping--not that she’d slept much, of late.

The mask certainly attracted its fair share of attention from the attendants around Red Lake Castle, but it was still better than the kind of attention that her horns attracted. It made being seen by strangers bearable again. Already, she’d begun to wonder if she would end up wearing it for the rest of her life.

These past two weeks, she’d really just wanted to be left alone, and for the most part, she’d been granted that. It was just too much. Everything. She wasn’t ready to think of herself as the responsible one, as the one who had to try to fill the unfillable chasms left by Mama and Papa and Cisco and even Gema. It was all wrong. All of it.

And then there was this training. It was the only thing she knew how to do, the only thing that seemed even remotely worth thinking about. And yet, her ability still terrified her. She hadn’t dared try to invoke it again, even though she knew that was the end goal here.

Training meant more than just meditating, however. It also required laborious study of anatomy and physiology. She’d always enjoyed biology, but she’d never studied it with this much rigor or sense of obligation.

Mutation was so strange. Unlike transfiguration and materialization, it didn’t rely on any particular elements. Rather, it stemmed from the formation and manipulation of biological molecules--proteins, in particular. Hers had manifested with keratin, according to Chergoa, which was apparently a common starting point for mutation users.

‘Some people call mutation “the anything power,” because in theory, you can use it to modify your body in any way you can imagine,’ the reaper had told her. ‘Now, that’s not QUITE true, but the sentiment is fairly accurate. For instance, with proper control, you could grow entirely new limbs--even wings, if you wanted. You could breathe fire. You could sharpen your senses, your reflexes, even make yourself more intelligent, potentially. Though, don’t try that last one, unless you’re extremely confident in your capabilities. Messing with your own brain is probably the most dangerous thing you can possibly do.’

Emiliana was in no rush to mess with anything.

‘Oh, and when you think you’re ready, you should start practicing on your non-dominant hand. I know it sounds kinda terrible, but at least that way, if you make a mistake, the damage won’t be too bad.’

Emiliana didn’t love the idea of having to sacrifice a hand just to practice, but she supposed the reaper had a point. Her hands couldn’t be made much worse than they already were, anyway. She’d tried to hide them with gloves, but when her claws didn’t get stuck on the cloth, they just ripped right through it. Instead, she’d gotten into the habit of hiding them in her pockets.

Aside from training, there wasn’t much else to do. Emiliana wasn’t allowed to leave the castle, nor did she wish to. Her thoughts often went to Alex. She’d only gone on one date with him before everything happened. Now, she could hardly imagine what he must be thinking. She hadn’t even spoken to him since then, but he’d surely heard the news about her family. Perhaps he thought she was dead. No, it was probably too soon for him to believe that.

“Hey, Emy,” came a distant voice from below. “What are you doing up there?” It belonged to Alicia Redwater, Octavia’s granddaughter.

Emiliana looked down from her high perch among the West Hall’s shadowy rafters. Lately, it had been difficult to find places where she could be alone. Red Lake Castle had felt huge and empty at first, but now, people were everywhere, most of them members of the gigantic Redwater family. Even Octavia and Wendy seemed to have trouble keeping track of them all. The vast majority of them, however, were non-servants like Alicia here.

“...How did you find me?” Emiliana asked.

“Your little brother,” said Alicia. “He’s worried about you.”

That stung. He was worried about her? She’d heard Marcos thrashing around in his bed at night, heard him whimpering and crying in his sleep. The brat had his own problems. He wasn’t supposed to be worrying about hers.

“I just wanted a quiet place to meditate,” said Emiliana.

Alicia squinted and turned her ear up toward her. “I can barely hear you. Would you mind coming down? How did you even get up there?”

Emiliana shifted her leg over the beam. ‘Chergoa,’ she called. ‘I’m done.’

‘Alright.’ The reaper appeared after a few moments and grabbed Emiliana’s shoulder.

With the vigor burning through her, she swung down and around the beam and then flung herself toward the ridged pillar she’d used to climb up. Her claws scratched against the old red-and-gray stone as she alternately slid and dropped her way to the floor. The maneuver earned her a few gawkers among the many passersby, but most acted like it was nothing special. No doubt, they’d seen much crazier things in their time.

“Wow,” said Alicia. “That was impressive.” She was the one looking down at Emiliana now, though not for lack of sincerity. At thirteen, she was a year younger, but her height suggested otherwise. It seemed strange that she could be related to such a tiny woman as Octavia.

Emiliana adjusted her dark mask and buried her claws in her pockets.

“I think you scuffed up the pillar, though,” Alicia added with a smirk.

She saw the faint claw marks. “Ah... I’m sorry. I used your madega last time and accidentally tore out a few chunks of the bark. Your gardener was upset.”

Alicia laughed. “It doesn’t matter. If anyone gets mad at you, just send them to me.”

They started walking together, with Chergoa following quietly.

“Anyway, it’s not just your brother, you know,” Alicia said. “Your sister is worried about you, too. And so am I.”

“...I appreciate your concern, but I am fine.”

“Have you eaten anything today?”

“...What day is today?”

“Friday.”

“Then, no.”

“Agh, aren’t you in training? How do you expect to keep up your strength if you skip meals?”

Emiliana didn’t answer that and just followed Alicia to the refectory. The lunch crowd had diminished somewhat, but there were still way too many people around for Emiliana’s liking. Alicia offered to sit and eat with her, but Emiliana grabbed a sandwich wrap and an iced tea to go. She wasn’t interested in removing her mask in order to eat in front of all these people.

Alicia kept following her, anyway.

‘C’mon,’ Chergoa urged. ‘Alicia’s trying to look out for you. The least you can do is try to carry a conversation with her.’

The reaper was right, Emiliana knew. She attempted a question of her own. “Are all of these people really your family?”

“Ah--well, some of them just work for us, but basically, yeah. Grandma only had one child--my papa--but her sister had nine. So I have a lot of cousins. Or rather, ‘second cousins once removed,’ technically.” She paused. “I looked it up after the last time they visited.”

“Wow...”

“Yeah. And then, as if that weren’t enough, Grandma and her brother had cousins with the name Redwater who also had children and grandchildren, so there are even more branches of my family out there. It’s super confusing. I honestly couldn’t tell you exactly how I’m related to ninety percent of the people here.”

“How many members of your family have reapers?”

Alicia bit her lip. “Oh, I should know this, um...I know it’s only a small fraction of our total number. I wanna say... twenty? I don’t think it’s more than thirty people.”

“That’s still a lot.”

“Yeah. I think only the Sebolts have more than we do.”

“Right.” Emiliana considered bringing up the more pressing subject of negotiations with the Vanguard, but she doubted that would do much to lighten the mood. And besides, she was sure that she already knew more about it than Alicia did. Chergoa had been keeping her apprised of developments--not that there had been very many. General Lawrence had not returned Zeff to Aguarey, and the Rainlords had yet to take aggressive action. Lawrence had, however, made it known that Cisco and Dennex were in his custody at Rheinhal. Apparently, he’d offered them as trade for either one of Axiolis or Shenado.

The allied Rainlords responded by sending him an umbrella.

When they reached the large guest room, Ramira immediately ran up to Emiliana and hugged her.

“What’s the matter?”

“Stupid!” Ramira said. “You were gone way too long!” It didn’t seem like much of a reason, but she sounded genuinely upset about it.

Emiliana couldn’t recall the girl ever hugging her before.

Ramira didn’t let go of Emiliana, instead just looking up at her and squinting. “Quit leaving me alone! I don’t know any of these stupid people!” She tossed a glance at Alicia. “No offense.”

Alicia just shrugged.

“I thought you liked being alone,” said Emiliana.

“Yeah, well, I don’t!”

“Then why are you always wandering off and eavesdropping on people?”

“Because that’s what spies do! It’s my job! That doesn’t mean I want you to disappear for nine hours!”

“Hey, I wasn’t gone that long.”

“Whatever!”

Alicia interjected. “You’ve been eavesdropping on people?”

Ramira looked at her blankly. “...No.”

“Right,” said Emiliana. “Did you learn anything juicy during this eavesdropping that you didn’t do?”

The little girl frowned. “Not really. With all these people around, you’d think there would be more going on, but no. It seems like everyone gets along really well. It kind of creeps me out... No offense.”

Alicia just shrugged again.

“I think it’s because everyone knows that there are invisible reapers all over the place who could be watching their every move and listening to all of their suspicious conversations,” said Ramira. “I think I might have to start going through their mail next.”

“That would be a federal crime,” Emiliana told her.

Ramira’s face scrunched up. “Federal? What does that mean?”

“It means both the Rainlords AND the Sandlords would be upset with you. And you’d go to prison for a really long time.”

Ramira squinted. “Nuh-uh. They wouldn’t put me in prison. I’m only nine.”

“Hey, I don’t make the rules.”

“You’re lying! You shouldn’t lie to me! I’m young and impressionable!”

Chergoa burst into a laugh. ‘She makes a good point. Don’t confuse your sister like that. Could cause her problems later. And when she finds out the truth, she’ll probably make you regret it. If I were her, you’d be waking up with glue in your hair the next day.’

The reaper made a compelling argument. “Okay, you wouldn’t go to prison. But you would get in a lot of trouble, so don’t open other people’s mail. Understood?”

“Fiiine...”

Emiliana took another look around the room. “Where is Marcos?”

“He said he was tired of meditating and went to explore the castle,” said Ramira.

Chergoa’s wispy eyes closed, and it took her a while before she could say, ‘He’s three floors below us. Shenado’s with him.’

Emiliana nodded. She took a seat on the end of her bed and removed her mask in order to eat. Ramira and Alicia sat with her and continued chatting, mostly about Ramira’s espionage. Alicia seemed rather keen to hear about what certain cousins of hers were up to. Emiliana could see a shady partnership being born. She shared her silent amusement with Chergoa.

As the day drew on, however, Emiliana found herself growing more and more restless. And she began to understand why. Her mother’s words were there in the back of her mind, urging her quietly onward. Grow up quickly. Be prepared. Protect what is important. Who is important.

Mask on, she looked across the room at her little sister one more time before heading off to the solitude of the lavatory. She asked Chergoa to come with her.

She locked the door behind her. There was plenty of room to work with in here. Three pristine silver sinks. A pair of toilets, each one with its own offshoot room for extra privacy. A large ceramic tub with a separate shower. Ample floor space with a shaggy rug.

She took a seat on the broad edge of the tub and stared at her left hand, flexing her fingers in anticipation. She breathed deeply, clutched her wrist with the other hand, and concentrated on what she wanted. Flat subtraction was impossible, of course, otherwise that would have been her goal.

Her fingertips burned as she watched the claws grow longer, thicker, sharper. Just as she’d imagined them in her mind. She hadn’t thought it would be so easy. She had to stop before they became blades unto themselves.

She inspected her work. They weren’t so gnarled anymore. Rather, they had hooking curves to them, and their lengths were almost uniform, boasting a good five centimeters or so. Compared to her right hand, the difference was unmistakable.

‘Nice work,’ said Chergoa. ‘That’s a good start. You should see if you can do something new now. Try manipulating a part of your skin--the knuckles, maybe. An application of keratin could make it more resilient.’

Emiliana made to respond, but when she looked up from her work, her eyes widened behind her mask as something else demanded her attention.

A pitch dark figure was suddenly there before her, taller than any person she had ever seen. But this wasn’t a person, seemingly. Rather, it looked more like a monster, covered in black scales and even bearing a tail in spite of its bipedalism. Its lithe torso seemed vaguely human, as did its folded arms and huge hands with long, gangly fingers, but its head was still a matter of debate. It appeared to have no mouth, somehow--or at the very least, no lips. A small protrusion in the scales suggested that the nasal passage was where it should be, but the eyes--those were piercingly reptilian, glowing faintly crimson, and most unsettling of all, staring right at her.

Emiliana was without a voice.

The creature was certainly alive and breathing, but it said nothing. If it even could. For a long moment, it only watched her, until it slowly turned its head and looked around in silence.

‘You okay?’ Chergoa asked privately. She’d been hovering next to Emiliana the whole time but didn’t seem especially perturbed by the monster’s presence.

Finally, Emiliana found the proper question.‘What the HELL is that thing?!’

Chergoa hesitated. ‘What thing?’

‘That giant monster! Right in front of us!’

‘Uh...?’

‘How can you not see it?! It’s right there!’

‘I don’t see anything,’ said Chergoa. ‘I don’t sense anything, either.’

‘What? Then...?’

The monster didn’t move. It only lingered there mutely, until at length, it faded away into empty space, dispersed like a whiff of smoke, leaving Emiliana to wonder if it had even been there to begin with.

‘It’s gone now... You really didn’t see anything?’

‘I really didn’t. You really saw a monster?’

She put a hand to her head. ‘I... I thought I did... What’s happening to me? Am I hallucinating?’

‘Hmm.’