《Small Chests Are Fine Too》Metal and Blood 2

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Journeying from Azurvale to the gnomish town of Steelhead via carriage had three distinct stages. It started off with teleportation to the town of Longington via Forest Gate, which instantly covered around half the distance. It would then take about a day to reach the border between the Ishigar Republic and the Horkensaft Kingdom, and another two to finish the trip. There were other, smaller settlements along the route, but Steelhead was the first major stop for any traveller looking to venture deeper into the stout folk’s homeland. However, getting there was something of a hurdle. The main road had no choice but to weave between dense forests on the Republic side and rocky highlands in Kingdom territory. Furthermore, the areas it cut through were largely untamed and uncivilized due to the region’s poor soil and temperamental climate. As such, it was a breeding ground for monsters that no amount of guard patrols from either side of the border could make a lasting impact on.

On the upside, the creatures that dwelled along this highway weren’t all that tough. Goblins, trolls, and kobolds, for the most part. They were fodder by all accounts, and two out of three of them knew better than to even attempt an attack on a heavily armed convoy. Bandit gangs were also a concern, but equally deterred by a blatant show of force. As such, travellers and merchants were encouraged to stick together as a large group with hired adventurers for extra protection. Of course, some people didn’t have the time, resources, or opportunity to team up with others and took the risk of traveling by themselves. Fizzy considered doing just that. She didn’t deem any of the local ‘wildlife’ a real threat, and she felt confident she could cover the distance to Steelhead faster than a carriage. Yes, she had very short legs, but they never tired and she didn’t have to follow the snaking roads. The Paladin then realized she had no way of navigating the wilderness and would likely get lost if she took that direct route. Last but not least, her missing limb would make it difficult to carry all her luggage.

Fizzy ultimately decided to travel with Jess and four other carriages, each of which had hired a team of adventurers for a total of twenty two bodyguards. It cost her a bit of gold and would take more time, but that price was worth the amount of effort and trouble it would save her. Travelling with the blonde gnome also meant she had an audience to appreciate her divine features and immense intellect. Oh, and she’d serve as the golem’s guide. Fizzy hadn’t been in Horkensaft since she was a little girl, and her memories of it were practically nonexistent. She’d be stupid to not take advantage of Jess’s company, who just so happened to be returning home after that war business was settled. Admittedly that naive gnome was a shut-in that knew very little about the nation itself, but having her around was better than not.

There was just one minor drawback with Fizzy’s plan. She wasn’t able to settle down. Though she had been calm at first, she steadily grew more anxious as time went by. With nothing to do and very little to distract her, the golem was stuck with her darker thoughts for most of the day. She felt like she was on pins and needles by the time the convoy pulled over for the night. The five carriages were arranged in a rough circle just off the main road with a large bonfire in the middle. All the other passengers and most adventurers had gathered around it and were enjoying dinner, but Fizzy refused to join them. She sat quietly in her stagecoach, her gaze fixated on the dark horizon and the twinkling stars hovering over it.

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“Okay. For real. What’s wrong with you?” Plus suddenly asked.

“Hm? What are you talking about?” the golem spoke aloud.

“You’re fidgeting.”

“No, I’m not.”

“You’re tapping the armrest so much you made a dent in it.”

Fizzy glanced towards her restless fingers as if to confirm that was indeed going on, then hurriedly shoved her hand in her pocket.

“I was just… counting seconds.”

“Fizzy. You’re only lying to yourself,” the alter ego pressed.

“Whatever.”

“Will you please tell me what the problem is?”

“What problem?”

“Normally you’d be out there striking cool pose after cool pose, maybe teaching those plebs to sing your praises. Not holed up in the corner.”

“I just don’t feel like it.”

“I’m not going to stop bugging you until you talk to me. Come on, we’re practically sisters.”

“Look, it’s just… I don’t know. I thought about doing that. Going out there, getting those meatbags to worship me. Usual stuff. But then I started getting… angry. Violently angry.. Like skull-cracking-and-spine-stomping levels of anger.”

“Huh. That’s weird.”

“Yeah.”

To be specific, the murderous urge itself wasn’t out of place. Fizzy experienced it every time someone dared to sully her glorious mithril frame, looked at her in any way other than awestruck, or otherwise implied she was not perfect. It was part of her monstrous nature as a golem, and she was used to suppressing it. Breaking her critics’ spines was no way to gain recognition in a civilized society. The bizarre thing about her current situation was that this urge never manifested itself in these circumstances.

“It’s probably just stress,” Plus suggested.

“Hmm. Maybe. It has been… an eventful few days.”

“In that case, all we need to do is blow off some steam. Easy!”

“Actually, I think you have a point. Let’s do that.”

“Alright!”

“I just need some victims that I won’t get into trouble for. Any ideas?”

“Uh… hm… Oh, yeah! Why don’t we ask that guy?”

“What guy?”

“What was his name again? Alexei or something?”

“Oh, the adventurer Jess hired?”

“Yeah, that one. Didn’t he mention something about some mean-ass hobgoblins in this area?”

“I don’t know, did he?”

“You might’ve been spacing out at the time.”

“Ah. Alright. Guess I’ll go do that. Thanks, Plus.”

“Anytime, boss!”

Fizzy could practically hear the imaginary smile and thumbs-up her alter ego was giving her. Regardless, the thought of inflicting lethal doses of blunt force trauma upon a living creature of flesh and blood was an enticing one, so she decided to have that adventurer lead her to some victims. The guy in question was a dwarf Berserker with a soot-colored beard in a double braid, and he was the leader of the four-man team that was currently on Jess and Fizzy’s payroll. Well, on paper the blondie was their sole employer, but the golem’s gold covered half their fee, so in practice they had equal authority over the hirelings. In any event, Alexei was easy to find. The Paladin spotted him the instant she peeked through the window. He was stuffing his face with some grilled meat near the big bonfire in the middle of camp, surrounded by another twenty or so people that were merrily eating, drinking, and chatting among themselves.

All of those eyes locked onto the mithril golem the instant she stepped out of the coach. This was the normal reaction. The yellow flames danced hypnotically across her frame, making her glow bright amidst the surrounding darkness. It was a dazzling sight that would no doubt be burned into the minds of every last person here.

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“Uh, Fizzy?” Plus piped up.

What?

“Shouldn’t we be dressed for this?”

Oh. Whoops.

The naked construct climbed back inside and hurriedly put her usual fire-retardant crop-top and shorts on. She had no idea when they had come off, which was a bit distressing. It had been ages since she worried about that old stripping habit of hers. Then again, it was thanks to Boxxy that she got that under control. The same could be said of her violent impulses. Perhaps it was only natural that she’d begin to… regress… now that she’d lost the only thing in her life that resembled a stabilizing element. This was going to be a problem if she hoped to accomplish anything in civilized society. On the upside, a golem’s lack of shame was quite helpful, as she had no trouble showing herself as soon as she got dressed. She strode over to Alexei under the onlookers’ combined gaze and waved him over with her left hand. Or at least she tried to, before she remembered that limb was no longer attached and had to use her right instead.

With her intent conveyed, the adventurer stood from his seat and went to meet her halfway.

“Aye? Something I can do for you, ma’am?”

“Earlier you mentioned some big-shot hobgoblin lived around here somewhere. Care to elaborate on that?”

“You mean the Scalper?”

Mentioning that moniker produced murmurs of discontent from the campfire group. The Berserker realized he probably shouldn’t discuss that matter so openly and nodded for Fizzy to follow him. The golem wasn’t sure why this was a sensitive topic, nor did she particularly care, but she went along with him anyway. Alexei led her back to their carriage and they climbed in, putting them out of earshot of the bonfire.

“So. What was that about?” Fizzy asked.

“Hrm. Nobody likes talking about the Scalper much,” the dwarf grumbled. “He’s a sweeper.”

“A what?”

“A sweeper. It’s what we call monsters that are way above the local Level. They usually come in from other regions and start throwing their weight around, upsetting the natural balance and whatnot. Scalper’s one of them. Nobody knows where he showed up from, but it’s been about five years since he did. Since then he’s rounded up a bunch of gobbos, whipped them into shape, and took over this old ruined fortress. Killed a whole bunch of trolls to do it. Not complaining about that, but him and his greenskin bastards have been plaguing the highway ever since. He’s a big reason why we gotta move in large groups like this.”

“Interesting. Does he have a bounty?”

“You shouldn’t be getting any ideas, ma’am. He’s not worth the trouble.”

“I didn’t ask for your opinion, meatbag. I asked if he had a bounty.”

“… Aye. Eight hundred pieces, last I checked.”

“Is that… a lot? I mean, for a bounty.”

It was a solid sum that could fund her Artificer work for about two weeks, once she got back to doing that.

“Like I said, it’s not worth it. Literally. It ain’t just him. Bastard’s got a small army of the toughest gobs this side of Azurvale, but they don’t account for that in the bounty. If it did, it would be ten times higher. Twenty even. The prize is way below the pay grade of people that can actually handle it.”

“Huh. What about public safety? Isn’t he a threat to everyone on this road?”

Surely there were one or two self-righteous nutjobs that wouldn’t mind getting rid of a menace regardless of any monetary gains or costs.

“Yeah, about that. He doesn’t attack anyone so long as we move in big groups like this. That’s how it’s been since he moved in. Folks just accepted it, I guess.”

“Hm. But you know where this Scalper’s hideout is, yeah?”

“Aye.”

The one that answered wasn’t the Berserker, but a shadow that suddenly climbed into the carriage. He was also a dwarf - a Rogue that was part of Alexei’s crew. Probably his brother, judging by the identical style and color of their beards. The Berserker was entirely too familiar with the skulker’s shenanigans and didn’t so much as bat an eye at the sudden intrusion. Fizzy flinched, though. She almost punched his head off on reflex, but barely managed to stop herself. She still wanted to deck him on principle, but this wasn’t the time or place for that.

“Kilroy, right?” she barely recalled his name.

“Aye,” he smirked.

“You know where this Scalper is?”

“… Aye,” he confirmed grimly.

“Can you get me there?”

“Aye,” he nodded firmly.

“Great, let’s go.”

“Aye!” he cheered.

The two of them practically leapt out of the carriage door and were about to set off when the brother ran up and stood in the golem’s path.

“Hold on, now!” he urged her. “I feel I must repeat my objections, ma’am.”

“Oh, really?” she glared at him. “And why must you?”

“You’re missing an arm! I know you’re the Rustblood Juggernaut and all, but even you’d be at risk if you charged the Scalper’s gang with that kind of handicap. I guarantee they’re nothing like any other goblins you might’ve faced before.”

Fizzy was usually quite thick-skinned, and not just literally. For better or worse, her astronomically high opinion of herself normally made her all but immune to any form of criticism. However, that was before she lost both an arm and the only other creature that meant anything to her. Those were two significant cracks in the otherwise impregnable fortress that was her ego, through which self doubt had started creeping in. The golem herself was not conscious of this flaw. If she was, then she might have reacted a bit more rationally to the dwarf’s genuine concern about taking on an unnecessary risk. But she wasn’t, and interpreted those words as an insinuation that she was vulnerable. Or weak. Powerless, even.

Her injured pride could not allow for this imagined slander to go unanswered, and so she lashed out.

“Listen here, meatbag.”

Fizzy put her good hand on Alexei’s shoulder. Her fingers squeezed and pressed down hard enough to instantly bring the Berserker to his knees. She ignored his muffled grunts of pain and looked down on him, eyes wide and brimming with contempt.

“You don’t get to tell me what to do,” she spoke through gritted teeth. “You can help me, you can stand aside, or you can get crushed under my heel. Those are your options. So. What’ll it be?”

She gradually increased the pressure in her grip as she spoke, causing Alexei’s legs to slowly sink into the gravelly soil underneath.

“Grrrnh,” the dwarf groaned under the strain. “Alright! You’ve made your point!”

The golem released him from her vice-like grip and smiled sweetly.

“Glad to hear it,” she chirped.

The dwarf rose to his feet, rubbing his sore shoulder. At first he didn’t know what to think of Fizzy. He knew she was a capable fighter after seeing her perform in Azurvale’s Stone District arena that one time. He had his reservations about her personality since his gut feeling as an adventurer warned him against trusting monsters. Yes, he’d heard rumors that she used to be a gnome before some weird curse turned her into a golem. There were also murmurs that she had personally assisted the Hero of Chaos in putting an end to the Republic-Empire war. Alexei doubted all of those until he met her in person just before the group set out from Azurvale. She seemed well-adjusted enough, and the mangled stump she had in place of an arm helped confirm that she had indeed put her life on the line against Teresa’s boy-toy. Of course, it was also impossible to ignore that her mithril frame was absolutely stunning. After all that, Alexei’s opinion of this strange metal girl had increased dramatically after their initial meeting.

This exchange, however, allowed him to get a firm grasp on her actual personality. Behind that radiant smile and the casual pleasantries was a monster’s heart. There was no doubt in the dwarf’s mind that Fizzy would not hesitate to kill him here and now if he continued to oppose her violent whims. Not even the most hopeless of battle junkies were this brazen. However, it was undeniable that there was some civility in her as well. She had given him a warning, which was more than any other monster had offered him before they attacked. In short, Fizzy was unquestionably a psycho, but one whose violent urges could be aimed and directed in a way that served the greater good. Now that he understood that, Alexei had no qualms about pointing her at the Scalper. He had no love for that greenskin. He and his brother had both lost some good friends to the hob’s gang when he first moved in, though the Rogue was much more bitter about it. Perhaps this was a sign - a chance to get some closure while also placating this crazy golem he had for a client.

That was the thought that had popped up in Alexei’s mind while his shoulder was getting crushed, and he felt it was for the best to let Fizzy have her way. He’d given his warning and she had elected to ignore it. Therefore, whatever happened next was entirely on her head. There was just one thing that still worried him about this arrangement.

“Kilroy,” he turned to his brother.

“Aye?” the Rogue raised an eyebrow.

“Show her to the old fort, but back off once the fighting starts. You’d only get in the Juggernaut’s way.”

“… Aye.”

“Huh. This guy’s smarter than he looks,” Plus commented.

Agreed, though that isn’t saying much.

“And ma’am?” Alexei turned to Fizzy.

“What?”

“Good luck.”

“I don’t need your luck,” the golem scoffed. “I make my own.”

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