Just like yesterday, I walked into the class and slammed my hands onto the table upon reaching it. Even though the students quieted the moment I entered, I still liked slamming my palms against the table. Maybe I actually hated tables. Who knows? Not even me.

“Alright, class. If you could remember from yesterday, we will be going over the fundamentals,” I announced.

“Sir! We already know the fundamentals of magic which is why we’re in Advanced Magic Class!” the stern blond boy said.

“What is your name? I am sick of calling you ‘Stern Boy’ in my head,” I asked.

“Sir, you are correct. My name is Shtern Boye,” the blonde kid answered.

I slammed my fist against my table then shouted, “Damn it, boy!”

“Yes, sir! That’s my name!” Boye exclaimed.

“Never mind that! The fundamentals of Advanced Magic is different from your garbage-... I mean… other magic schools of magic. The magic you know is persistent - a quantifiable element or component in reality. However,” I pointed a finger up and leaned closer, “that isn’t magic!”

A small fire erupted on the tip of my finger, then it seemingly changed into a ball of water before finally turning into a piece of leaf.

“True magic is unpredictable, unaccountable, indescribable, and unknowable. Advanced Magic is accepting chaos, and learning how to make ordered chaos,” I explained.

“What does that mean? I’m confused!” a student asked.

“Good! You are already ahead of the class!” I praised. “Anyway, we will begin-... Wait!”

I pointed at a student that shouldn’t be in my class sitting next to Kendra. “Why are you here?!”

Iova, Kendra’s supposedly ‘big sister’, was hugging Kendra to death while the little girl had seemingly given up her struggle. “I wanted to be closer to Kendra so I decided to take this class!” she answered.

“You can’t just barge into my class. You’ll have to get my permission. Sorry, kid. Pack your things,” I replied while pointing at the door with my thumb.

Iova got off her seat and approached me with a piece of paper. She placed it onto my table and slipped a few sheets of silver on top of it. “I’ll give you some Cahalotian silvers if you approve my class transfer,” she whispered.

“Ok.” I signed the paper and took the sheets into my pockets.

After Iova took her seat again, I decided to continue the class. “I suppose I’ll have to take your attendance. Kendra?”

“I want to die.”

“Good. You’re present.” I marked on the attendance sheet.

“Boy?” I called out.

“Present, sir!”

“I should just mark you as present on all days,” I mumbled as I marked on the sheet.

“That kid that I want to fail?” I called out and noticed that annoying snob was still frozen in place. “Good, you’re present.”

“The annoying bubbly girl?” I called out.

“Present, Supreme High-Over-Boss!” came the reply.

“The really muscled kid?” I called out.

“Grrr!”

“Good. Don’t forget to bring notebooks for note taking,” I advised and marked onto the attendance sheet.

I went through the rest quickly and began my class. Surprisingly, the two heroes Blackhair and Aera were still alive. They were covered in bandages, but other than that, they still managed to attend class. Inez looked very satisfied, so I supposed I should thank her later.

Lard came back when class was about to finish, but it didn’t matter since he wouldn’t be much help during my lectures. Once class was over, Lard and I went straight to the gathering hall to start destroying people’s hopes and dreams.

There were some new faces challenging us, but they weren’t much of a problem. Lard was becoming popular among the nerds, but since they were all anti-social, they didn’t talk much. When dusk comes, the students had to return to their homes or dorms, so I would retire in my bedroom.

My schedule remained the same for the next few days, though people from other departments were beginning to challenge us. Honestly, I didn’t care since Lard was the one playing the game. I was busy with fixing the hero summoning spell in hopes that I wouldn’t get some psychopathic maniac, while Lard was busy practicing his strategy skills.

Two weeks after the ‘Sister’ incident which Lard refused to talk about, my daily schedule was finally interrupted.

As usual, I was lying in my bed motionless in my pyjamas.

“Do you think it would be funny if food screamed?” I said as I stared at the ceiling.

“What?” came the reply. Other than me, someone else shared my room.

“I said do you think it would be funny if food screamed?” I repeated.

“I don’t know, Boss. Perhaps it’ll be funny at first, but it’ll become irritating fast,” the person I was speaking to replied.

“Then again Rookie’s a walking pile of food, and-...”

I was interrupted when someone knocked on my door. I looked at the person I was conversing to, then clapped my hands. “Lights.”

She sighed then audibly whispered, “Lights.”

In an instant, her head shone brightly like a lamp.

To be more precise, she was a lamp.

My current lamp was actually a wood nymph with a lampshade on her head. In fact, she wasn’t even a wood nymph. This person, named Satel, was actually a fairy controlling a body made out of roots and bark. Since the body she was using was as tall as a little girl, I decided not to waste the opportunity to turn her into a lamp.

I kicked my legs off my bed, then put on my bunny slippers. I approached the door and gently opened it. On the other side, I was greeted by a familiar figure which was hard to miss.

Despite the fact that she had covered herself in dark robes, her huge… Abysses were hard to hide. I scratched my chin then asked, “What is it, Yomi?”

“H-How did you know it was me?! Is my disguise really that bad?” Yomi asked as she looked over herself.

Now that I thought about it, I was surrounded by little brats! Why couldn’t I be blessed with a party of hot women?! If someone told me that a party of hotties needed a teacher, I would smash through that old stronghold and break myself out! I felt like in all the time spent exploring the whole world, my eyes hadn’t been blessed by such bountiful… Abysses in a long time! Recounting it now, I could only count such times with only one hand!

Did something happened to cause the world’s mountains to degrade into plains? For the good of all humanity, I must look into this. This was more important than figuring out why all the halflings disappeared without a trace.

“No. I am just simply very observant. Tell me what you want quickly. I have important… research to attend to,” I ordered.

“Oh! It’s about our deal! You said you wanted to learn necromancy?” Yomi asked.

I smiled in my mind as I nodded. “Say no more. Let’s go now.”

I took my cloak and locked the door behind me. As the door clicked, I heard a faint whisper in the distance, causing me to cock my head into the far darkness.

“Is something wrong?” Yomi asked.

“No. Must be the delinquents hanging outside,” I replied as I draped my cloak over my pyjamas. Yomi began leading the way along the corridor and I followed closely.

“How’s Kendra? I couldn’t find the time to meet her because I had to report to the officials in the city. They're so bureaucratic and so boring,” Yomi complained while I ignored her.

I was too busy looking over my shoulders as I had a feeling someone was watching me closely. No, ‘watching’ was a bad word choice. Someone was stalking me. Could it be Lard’s sister? Did she somehow managed to get back to take revenge on me?

As I listened closely, Yomi stopped when we both heard a new set of footsteps. I clenched my fist and made a gap between my feet, ready to punch a child again. This time, I’ll make sure to punch her so hard, it’ll send ripples through the heavens.

When a new figure appeared across the hallway, Yomi gasped.

“Mauri?!” Yomi exclaimed. She was about to run towards her when the newcomer raised her hand towards us.

“WAIT! Don’t make a move!” Mauri shouted.

Yomi froze in the spot and went, “Eh?”

Mauri placed a finger against her lips, wordlessly telling us to keep quiet. “I lost her and I can’t find her. Have you two seen-...”

The strange person stopped mid-sentenced then froze in the spot with a shocked expression. She was looking behind me, so I followed where her eyesight was going to.

As I turned, something moist dripped onto my shoulder. I rubbed it off with my finger and examined it.

Is… this drool?

Everything clicked in motion within my head. A thousand years of experience told my legs to push themselves into action. My mind was completely taken over by the wild, primal instinct to survive. I rolled, then used near-divine spell to teleport a few meters from where I was standing. Not a split of a moment later, a figure landed on where I was standing. The person was wearing a thick black-and-red dress complimenting her silky black hair. The crown on her head only meant one thing - she was the vampire dwarven queen, Ellysa!

“My love! How brash of you to make me chase after you!” Ellysa shouted as she waved with a huge smile.

“How did you get through my spell? I made sure you would stay in your palace until the end of times,” I hissed.

“That doesn’t matter! What matters is this!” The moment she finished her sentences, Ellysa crouched then kicked herself forward faster than I anticipated. There wasn’t enough time to dodge her!

I raised my hand then opened it. “LUCIA!”

In front of me, from my shadow, a small girl in a black maid’s dress rose from the ground. Before she could even fully rise up, I immediately snapped my finger. “Unstoppable Guard!”

Ellysa slammed directly into Lucia like crashing into a brick wall, knocking her back onto the floor. When Lucia finally emerged from my shadow fully, she raised her hand and greeted, “Your lordship called for this one?”

“Good job, Lucia,” I praised with a thumbs up.

“This one does not know why your lordship is praising this one, but the gesture is appreciated!” Lucia replied.

I walked towards the living failure that was knocked out on the floor to inspect my work.

The moment I locked my door, I had already prepared a near-divine spell just in case. I had suspicions that I needed something strong to deal with my stalker. My years of experience dealing with The Abyss had finally paid off.

“W-... What just happened?” Yomi, who was still registering my less-than-ten seconds encounter with Ellysa, finally spoke up.

I grabbed Ellysa, still dazed and drooling, by the back of her collar then dragged her up.. “This happened,” I replied.

“You!” Mauri pointed at me.

“Me?” I pointed at myself.

“You’re an undead?!” she accused.

…

I dropped Ellysa onto the floor then patted my hands. Coughing twice, I replied, “What is an undead?”

“Don’t play dumb! You’re the source of the scent of the dead!” she retorted.

I raised one of my arms and smelt my armpits. “I don’t smell that bad.”

“Mauri, is this true?” Yomi asked from the side.

“That vampire had been tracking a very powerful undead for the past few days. That so-called undead happened to be that person! Not only that, because of my strong affiliation towards the essence of undeath, it’s not hard for me to identify the undead,” Mauri explained.

“Hmpf. You have one thing wrong. If I am an undead…” I pressed my hand against my face like how Lard would usually do pose, “then why don’t I look like a fashion disaster?”

“You are! What’s with those bunny slippers?!” Mauri retorted.

“Tsk. It seems I’ve been found out. It seems that I have no choice!” I shouted.

“W-What are you going to do? Kill us? I wouldn’t be surprised. You have the power to stop the vampire Ellysa. But know this, undead! I wouldn’t go down without a fight!” Mauri shouted.

“H-Hold on, Mauri! Don’t be stupid!” Yomi interjected.

“Your friend is right, spirit. After all, what I am about to do is even worse than death!” I exclaimed.

Mauri’s face turned grim as her hands started to nervously shake. Despite her crumbling courage, she continued to stand her ground in a combat stance. “And what is that, undead?”

“I’ll call for guards! Muahahaahah! Everyone knows that the opposite sex isn’t allowed in the male dormitories! You will be branded as a pervert within not only the academy, but also in the entire city state!” I exclaimed as a shot my arms out then waved it away victoriously. It's hard to admit it, but I learned a thing or two from Lard's sister.

Mauri looked at Yomi, then looked back at me with a skeptical gaze. “You do know that the dormitory you’re in is the academic staff’s personal lodging? It’s unisex.”

Someone kill me.

“I… I mean. Yeah. Sure, whatever you say. I was just testing you,” I muttered as I pretended to rub dust off my shoulders.

“Wait. You’re an undead?” Yomi asked.

“Yeah, sure. Just don’t start a panic over it or by some huge coincidence, a massive earthquake might occur. It happens,” I replied.

“To be exact, what kind of undead are you?” Mauri asked with a squinted gaze.

“I’m the world’s first and only Archlich. The highest form of undeath,” I answered.

“No wonder you were exuding such strong presence of undeath.” Mauri sighed then nodded.

“Excuse me? Do I really smell that bad?” I asked as I raised my arm to smell my armpit once more.

“You weren’t even aware?! Argh! All the worries I had… all for nothing!” Mauri fell on her knees then cried her anger towards the floor. She looked up with tired eyes and asked, “Is it alright if I place a barrier around you to stop the extreme leak of undeath into the Spirit World?”

“Would it affect me in any way?” I shot a question as I scratched my chin.

“Unless you want to deliberately leak essence of the dead and make your presence be known to everyone that could detect undeath, no,” Mauri answered. “The process would only take a second as well.”

“Fine. Do it,” I consented as I lazily waved my hand.

Just as Mauri said, it only took a few seconds to place a new barrier over me. My defenses detected no malicious attacks against me, so I was fine with this… spirit’s request.

“I thank you, Lord Archlich, for dealing with my rudeness and selfishness. I am Mauri, Spirit of the Road between Life and Death.” Mauri bowed respectfully at me after she was done.

“It’s Archlich, not Archlich,” I corrected her.

“Pardon me?” Mauri asked.

“Never mind. So you’re the spirit that has to deal with my shenanigans everytime any one of my companions die, huh?” I raised my head inquisitively.

“Ah...I suppose so, Lord.” Mauri lowered her head while scratching her head nervously.

“Then, we’ll consider this even.” I nodded.

Whenever any one of my companions died, it would take time for them to reform in the mortal realm. However, their consciousness would be temporarily transferred into the Spirit World like some kind of lost tourist in a foreign country. Like many lost tourists in a foreign country, my companions were usually quite rude and overbearing towards the host spirits.

The spirits couldn’t do anything against my companions so they had to put up with their demands like having a massive mansion with a beach next door. According to them, the Spirit of the Road between Life and Death would usually play host to them.

“Now, you have to tell me why you are here with this… thing,” I asked as I grabbed Ellysa by the back of her neck once more. By now, she was slowly regaining her consciousness so I chopped the back of her head to send her back to Dreamland.

“Casually knocking out a vampire lady just like that. As expected of an archlich…” Mauri muttered and sighed. “If Lord Archlich wishes to know, I wouldn’t dare not tell you. But it’s going to take some time.”

“Sure. I’m free right now…No, wait. I’m not. I was on my way to observe Yomi’s necromancy class,” I replied while pointing at Yomi with my thumb.

When I looked at Yomi, I could see stars twinkling in her eyes. “Ah ah… I- I-... I greet senior!” the sorcerer shouted as she bowed. “But why would you want to learn necromancy from me?”

“I’m more interested in how your necromancy works,” I answered.

“My skills is much, much inferior to senior’s! After all, you are an archlich!” Yomi exclaimed.

“Archlich.” I sighed.

“Eh? Yes. Archlich. Anyway, what I mean to trouble senior with is if you could… teach the class instead?” Yomi clasped her hands together then begged.

“Ha?” I snorted.

Teacher of heroes.

Teacher of magic.

Teacher of x, y, and z.

Why does it feel like I was not only becoming the world’s greatest necromancer, but also the world’s greatest(?) teacher?