Within the walking mansion with metal crab legs, a pile of enchanted mud planned his world domination.

For indeed, nothing short of complete subjugation of all life on the planet would allow true safety into perpetuity. Experience had shown that risk to Mud's directives could come at any time. The only question that remained was how exactly the golem known as Mud would accomplish its goal of complete global hegemony.

Perhaps the most obvious first step would be to further increase personal power. Already, Mud had entered tier three within the first month of its life. From what it understood, that was an unusually fast speed. This instrumental goal of increasing personal power could be achieved in many ways, from training skills to meditating on Ideals, but the quickest and most reliable would be gaining experience. If Mud could enhance its level to at least seventh tier, there would remain little in this world that could pose a threat to the golem.

The second step to world domination is collecting powerful, clever, and loyal minions. In that regard, Mud's current batch was flawed. Jabrax and Cob lacked loyalty, Cob and Novus lacked power, and Novus was not particularly clever. Ego was the closest to perfect ally, but like Mud she required more levels. There was also the fact that she was one of The Master's possessions, which limited her utility. She could not be used for suicide attacks or missions with a risk of capture, for example.

Mud concluded that more, higher quality minions needed to be collected. Perhaps a new organization could be formed, modeled after those employed by Sapients. The creation of such an organization, to manage Mud's empire and assist in large scale endeavors, was the third step in world domination.

From there, it was merely a matter of crushing dissenters while slowly spreading its influence. As far as Mud knew, constructs are immortal. Mud had all the time in the world to become more powerful. In fact, should one live long enough, it seemed inevitable that they would amass a large amount of power and ability.

But if that were the case, why is Jabrax so weak? Sure, by civilian standards, she's a powerhouse. Considering her age, however, she seemed almost absurdly weak. Was Mud's reasoning incorrect? Had the golem missed some critical factor that would limit its growth? With growing concern for its plot of global conquest, Mud trudged down into the basement to consult with its demon.

Jabrax, as it happened, was busy making some modifications to Bark on the surgery table when Mud walked in.

"Jabrax, why are you weak?"

The demon jerked up from her slicing, a look of confusion on her face. "Excuse me?"

"You have informed me that you are in excess of two thousand years old and can not die. Why are you not tier ten yet?"

"Ah, that." Jabrax continued to work on the conscious, but dreaming, Bark. "Well, this isn't exactly secret information, since the Sapients figured it out a while ago, but don't spread what I'm about to tell you around."

Mud silently waited for her to continue, head swaying as usual.

"The simple fact of the matter is, Demons don't really level like you do. We don't have tiers or any of that. We simply are what we are. From birth, we already reflect our true selves."

"Can't you still become stronger by mastering large numbers of Ideals and amassing Rare skills?" Retorted Mud.

"The problem with that is-" Jabrax's explanation was cut short as the mansion suddenly lurched forward, the building tilting sharply. Mud stumbled and slid down the now steep floor, and Bark fell from the table and proceeded to roll to the wall. "What happened?" Asked Jabrax in surprise.

"All four of the front legs have fallen into sinkholes. The holes then sealed themselves, trapping the legs."

Moments later, the house leveled out as the opposite side of the mansion fell heavily, the mass of the mansion striking the ground with a bang. "The remaining four legs have been similarly trapped." After a moment of delay, Mud continued. "There is a single individual approaching the front door."

Jabrax walked towards the sub-basement. "The cannon?"

"No." Mud focused on the figure approaching the door. "I suspect that this individual is not the one responsible for our capture, but instead a messenger on their behalf. I do not wish to escalate the conflict, as they might damage The Master's mansion. I will attempt communication."

"Perhaps it would be better if I did the talking?"

"That will not be necessary." Mud boldly walked up the stairs from the basement. "I read a worksheet about negotiation."

When Mud answered the door, he found standing before him a scruffy bipedal lizard wearing a camouflage cloak and a pair of goggles. For the first time in the golem's life, it would talk to someone without having to look up at them.

"Greetings, dirty man. Are you the owner of this crab?"

Mud remembered what it had learned from the worksheet. The first step to any trade was introductions. "I am Mud Golem. Give me your name."

The Kobold tried to lean around Mud to see into the house. "I am Kit. Are you the master of this place?"

Names have been exchanged successfully. It seems the Kobold wished to exchange additional personal information."I am the leader of this place. Who is your master?"

The Kobold momentarily halted his attempts to peak around Mud to stand proudly. "I have the honor of representing her majesty the Queen of this mountain, the great Earth Dragon Lutumocus."

This was all going exactly according to plan. Next is to make an opening offer. Mud simply wanted to continue on its journey unopposed, but the worksheet had advised asking for more than you actually wanted, so that you could give concessions later. "I demand that your Queen give me all of her territory and possessions immediately."

At that, the Kobold scout choked and stumbled backward, hands raised in shock. "Wh-what? You dare challenge a dragon for her land?"

"Do you accept?"

The Kobold stomped his foot and shook a fist above his head angrily. "Never! We will never accept such disrespect!"

As expected, the excessive offer was refused. Now, Mud would lower the initial offer slightly to show a willingness to negotiate. "Instead of all of the territory, I will accept the Queen as a slave. That would be an acceptable alternative." Dragons are known to be powerful, so she would likely be a useful minion.

"You...!" The Kobold was at a loss for words. Mud was worried that the Kobold was not making any counter-offers. Mud decided to assist the clearly inexperienced and ignorant Kobold by offering something of value from its own side.

"In exchange for your Queen, I will not destroy your country." Mud wasn't planning on attacking or engaging in hostilities anyway, but an assurance to not do so in the future could still be seen as valuable. Surely, any existing country or large organization had come to the same realizations that Mud had, that all uncontrolled groups should be assumed to be hostile. A promise of non-hostility should therefore be valuable. Enforcing the promise would even be possible with a contract.

The Kobold stood silently, mouth agape. Perhaps the deal was not yet sweet enough. "I will also give you..." Mud dug through its torso for something it could trade. Eventually, Mud pulled out a small object and placed it in the Kobold's hand. "This hard candy. Do you accept?"

The Kobold looked down at the candy in its hand, then back at Mud. He repeated this action three more times. The scout slowly backed away from the golem and off of the porch. Once a fair distance away, the Kobold turned around and sprinted into the woods.

Mud closed the door. It seems the negotiations had gone perfectly. Mud's true goal in the negotiations was to make the Kobold leave without hostilities, and now the Kobold had left. Although there were some hiccups, everything had turned out as desired. Strangely, despite how perfectly Mud had performed, the golem had gained no relevant Skill from the Akashic. Mud was fully expecting to gain the Negotiation or Haggling skill, or perhaps several ranks of the skill at once.

As Mud planned how to extract the house's trapped metal legs from the sinkholes, the golem was shocked to see a large number of lifeforms entering its Domain from all sides. Many shared the short stature of Kobolds, but others were much larger. Once again, a knocking came from the front door of the mansion.

Perhaps the negotiations had not gone as well as Mud had at first believed. Did the excessive demands cause the Kobold to believe Mud was unreasonable and not worth negotiating with? Answering the door was not an option, as the forces outside implied threat of violence. Mud turned towards the stairs, to inform Jabrax that it was time to use the cannon. Unfortunately, Mud was not yet skilled enough to penetrate multiple floors with its Mind mana.

Mud hesitated halfway when one of the large shapes neared the front door and slammed into it. No damage was done, thankfully. Mud continued to walk, but hesitated again as a pale blue aura covered the door; some kind of magic. A red runes appeared on the door, and the magic faded. Mud continued.

Once more the blue magic appeared, but this time much more intense and vibrant. The red runes flashed to life, but were quickly overcome by the much denser magic. As the runes finally failed, a soft click came from the door, and it slowly swung open. There, standing outside the door, was a winged Green Dragon.

"I would like to reopen negotiations. I will well leave with my mansion, and in exchange-" Mud's attempt at diplomacy was cut short as the dragon slipped through the much-too-small door with an impressive display of flexibility, then pounced towards Mud with claws outstretched. So large was the Dragon that his back brushed against the roof of the entrance room even as it stood quadrupedally.

Mud managed to slip out of the Dragon's grasp with its Amorphous Form, but the Magical Beast's strength and speed meant that it was grasped again as soon as it freed itself. As the dragon became increasingly annoyed, it unleashed a bellowing growl towards the entrance. A short time later, a Kobold soldier ran in carrying a sealed urn.

In the meantime, Mud tried to fight back, but in vain. Its blades failed to penetrate the Dragon's sturdy scales, and its magic faded upon contacting the dragon with no apparent effect. Even striking its own metal frame with Force Bolt failed to move Mud fast enough to escape from the wrestling Dragon. In a moment of desperation, Mud attempted to divide itself in two, but the Dragon merely slammed the golem's body back into one mass.

When the Kobold soldier arrived, it held the large urn aloft. After removing the top, the Dragon quickly regained a grip on Mud and shoved the construct into the dark, confined interior. Before Mud could escape, the top was quickly sealed.

No matter how Mud thrashed and pushed, the urn did not yield, and magic was as useless on the urn as it was against the dragon. Although Mud could still see its Domain from inside the urn, the golem had not yet mastered the ability to the point of actually being able to do anything useful. Mud could only watch helplessly as Cob and Novus were captured by a Dragon and several Kobolds. The two were tied up and carried out of the mansion, along with the urn containing Mud. Although they explored the basement, the invaders did not discover the sub-basement, in which now hid Jabrax, Jericho, and Bark.

But the worst was yet to come. Once the building was considered clear by the enemies, Kobold soldiers marched in and began carrying handfuls of objects out of the mansion. This is unacceptable! Mud vibrated with rage. Unfortunately, there was nothing the golem could do.

When the group was led out of Mud's domain, the golem was no longer certain what was happening. It felt the rhythmic falling of a Kobold walking for hours, carrying the urn that Mud was trapped in. Most of the travel tended towards uphill marching, but, near the end of their journey, they began to descend instead. Finally, Mud was set on the floor.

A short time after being set down, the top of the urn was removed. Not wanting to miss its chance at escape, Mud quickly lept out, barely avoiding striking Cob in the face. Nearby, Novus clutched her knees to her chest while rocking slowly.

The group was in the center of a glowing ring of runes, itself located in the center of a stone room. Mud recognized the runes immediately; it was a containment circle, similar to the one that had trapped Jabrax when they first met. Escape from the inside would be nearly impossible. Standing against the walls of the room were two Kobold soldiers, watching the group with curiosity.

Perhaps I should have let Jabrax negotiate, thought Mud.