《Emmy And Me》On A Mission
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The rest of my workout was uneventful, and when I got back to the apartment with Starbucks coffees and breakfast sandwiches the others were just starting to stir.
We ate out on the outdoor living area, then said our goodbyes. I slipped Michael some cash to cover gas for the truck and food, plus a few hundred as a ‘thank you’ for helping out. Once the two had driven away, Emmy turned to me and asked “Now what?”
“Well, babe, we’re here in the entertainment capital of the world. Go be entertaining,” I said, getting one of Emmy’s laughs that sound like bells, or wind chimes or something like that.
“O.K., then that is what I shall do,” she said as we walked back inside our new home.
Lee and Jen came over early that afternoon to discuss the Downfall’s plans and see the new place, respectively. I had nothing to add to Lee and Emmy’s conversation and neither did Jen, so the two of us went out for a drive. We promised we’d bring dinner back, but otherwise had a few hours to kill. Jen had grown up in San Jose, and I was from San Diego County, so neither of us really knew West LA at all, besides just the famous streets. As a result, we just sort of drove around aimlessly for a while until Jen spotted a guy selling maps to the homes of the stars. She bought one, and, following the directions, we wound our way through parts of Bel Air and Holmby Hills, but it wasn’t until we found ourselves winding around all these crazy little streets up in the Hollywood Hills that I found any of it interesting.
“Well, sure, you and Emmy have more money than you could shake a stick at- it’s no wonder those giant fucking houses don’t impress you,” Jen said when I commented that Bel Air left me cold. “But me? I see those houses and dream.”
“You guys have money now, too,” I objected. “I know how much the Downfall has made over the last three years.”
“How much money Lee has made,” said Jen. “Me, I’m just the girlfriend. “I’ve got a job in a gallery downtown, but it’s really just enough for me to say that I’m bringing in some. He’s the one that actually pays all our bills, and bought the house. In his name alone, I might add.”
“Are you guys not doing O.K.?” I asked, surprised to hear the bitterness in Jen’s voice.
“Oh, no, we’re doing fine, especially now since Dragon Mama has given up on trying to get Lee to dump me and find a nice Korean girl. It’s just…” Jen said, thinking about what she needed to say. “It’s just that it’s all him, you know? I have a hard time just being the ‘plus one’. I’ve been waiting for him to ask me to marry him, but at this rate I’m not sure it’s ever gonna happen, you know?”
“Honestly, I’m surprised he hasn’t,” I said, negotiating a bend in the road that seemed to corkscrew around on top of itself. “I’ve never even seen him look at another woman,” I said.
“You know what? I don’t think he has,” admitted Jen. “I mean, it’s a running joke that if either of us gets a chance to sleep with Emmy we’re free to go for it as far as each other is concerned, but I don’t even think he really looks at Emmy in any sort of sexual way anymore. He’s even said that she’s more like a sister than Hannah is.”
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“Hannah?” I asked.
“You’ve never met Hannah, his sister? Count yourself lucky,” Jen said, slumping back in her seat. “She’s a total bitch.”
“I’ve never talked to Lee about his family, like, ever,” I said, pulling to a stop in front of what the map said was Charlie Chaplin’s old house- but all you could see were tall hedges and an ornate iron gate.
“So, let me give you the rundown. Lee’s dad is dead, probably poisoned by his wife, Lee’s mom. She’s a mean old bat. I’ve never heard her say anything nice about anyone. When Lee bought her a really nice house over in the San Gabriel Valley, in Arcadia, she didn’t even say thanks as far as I know. Did you know she’s the source of the band name?”
“The Downfall?” I asked, surprised.
“Yeah. When Lee gave up the piano at thirteen and only wanted to play the drums, she told him that it was shit, he’d never amount to anything playing the drums, and she forbade him from playing. All that meant is that he moved his drum kit to a friend’s house and hardly ever spent any time at home from then on.”
“So, the name?” I prompted, pulling away from chez Chaplin.
“She told him that rock music was going to be his downfall, and to not come crying back to her when everything went bad.”
“Emmy never told me that,” I said, thinking about it.
“Yeah, well, when he bought her a three million dollar house in Arcadia, she didn’t remind him of that moment, either, now did she,” Jen said, bitterly.
“I can see why she wouldn’t have brought it up,” I agreed with a chuckle.
“So anyhow, Hannah, Lee’s younger sister, she’s just the same. Mean, rude, generally unpleasant to even be near, much less spend any time with. When we do see her, she spends all her time trash-mouthing me. They both hate The Downfall, Jackson and Emmy, but seem to reserve most of their… animosity towards me. Mainly because I’ve taken Lee away from them, but also because I’m a gaijin.”
“You know that’s a Japanese word, not Korean, right?” I asked.
“Whatever,” Jen said. “You get the idea.”
“Yeah, I think I do,” I agreed.
“So if you ever get in a killing mood and need a good victim, there’s two who would benefit the world from being stabbed,” Jen said.
“I’ll keep it in mind,” I replied, rolling my eyes.
Eventually we found ourselves back on Santa Monica Boulevard, so I turned west. “Look for a place to grab something for dinner,” I said to Jen.
“Pink’s! We gotta do Pink’s!” Jen said, suddenly excited.
“What’s Pink’s?” I asked.
“It’s a classic- old school Hollywood place. Hot dogs. Really famous. We gotta go,” Jen said. “I think it’s on, um, La Brea or something.”
“You want to take hot dogs, from a place that’s famous, back to Lee and Emmy to have for dinner?” I asked, incredulous.
“Yeah?”
“How about we go back to the apartment, get Lee and Emmy, and go to this hot dog place for dinner? That way they get the whole ‘famous Hollywood eatery’ experience, too?” I suggested.
“Deal,” Jen agreed, nodding once.
On our way back to Century City, Jen asked, “So you know Lee’s been making more money with The Downfall than he ever would have with an MD/PhD, right?”
“Yeah,” I said, wondering where she was going with this.
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“But he told me that Emmy gives away all her income to charity,” Jen said.
“Yeah, she does,” I agreed.
“He said every dime.”
“Yeah, it all goes to charity.”
“So all her net income from the band goes to, like, refugee aid organizations?” Jen asked for clarification.
“No, all her gross income,” I replied.
“Seriously? So where do you guys have all this money from?” Jen asked.
“I have a company that does real estate investments, property managements, that kind of thing, and another that does hospitality. Restaurants, night clubs, you know. Also, I do venture capital with tech start-ups.”
“So it’s your money? I got the impression from what Lee said that Emmy’s parents are loaded,” Jen said.
“Well, they gave her a bunch of money, a trust fund, and when we started at Stanford I used that money to get started,” I explained.
“How much money?” Jen asked.
Normally I’d find questions like that intrusive, but I knew Jen and she wasn’t the type to mean anything by it. “The trust fund was a hundred million Euros, but I only invested half that,” I said.
“So, that’s what, a hundred and thirty million dollars? Divided by two, that’s sixty-something million?” Jen asked.
“Yeah, more or less,” I agreed.
“And how have the investments done?”
“Well, my REIT- that’s a real estate investment trust- is valued at nearly seven hundred million dollars now, the hospitality division is worth roughly a hundred forty million, but it isn’t very profitable, and I just cashed out of one of my venture capital investments at eighty-two million. You know that video sharing app that just had its IPO? That one.”
“So, you’re like, almost a billionaire?” Jen asked, stunned.
“Well, no, that’s not actually how it works,” I said, but at the blank look on her face I said, “Yeah, I’m most of the way to being a billionaire.”
“And you’re not even twenty-two yet,” Jen said, her voice hushed.
“I’m only three months away,” I said.
“I don’t even understand how you’ve done this,” Jen said, looking out the window.
“Like I said, Emmy’s parents gave us a hell of a head start,” I replied, turning south on the Avenue Of The Stars.
“You make me feel like a complete loser,” Jen said with a sigh.
Emmy and Lee were fine with the idea of going to Pink’s, so we all piled into Lee’s Mercedes for the drive back to Hollywood.
When the staff realized who was there (and it only took them seeing Emmy to recognize her) the manager came out to take photos of Emmy and Lee for their ‘Wall Of Fame’. Plenty of other patrons, tourists mostly, wanted selfies with the two of them, so dinner was a time-consuming process.
“Nobody ever recognizes Lee,” Jen said while the two members of The Downfall posed for pics with fans.
“Everybody recognizes Em,” I said.
“Yeah, I bet you guys can’t go anywhere and not get mobbed,”Jen agreed.
“You know what though?” I asked, watching fans tell Emmy how much they adored her.
“What?” Jen asked.
“It was the whole point,” I said. “The whole idea of starting a band was to get famous and for Emmy to be known nationwide, or even better, worldwide.”
“Well, it worked,” Jen said, taking a bite of her ‘Rosie O’Donell dog’.
“Yeah, it did.”
After our dinner of surprisingly good hot dogs, we stopped off at a liquor store and bought some supplies on our way back to our new home. I mixed drinks for everybody, then Jen and I went out onto the outdoor living area while Lee and Emmy returned to their Downfall discussion.
“I like this- well, it isn’t really a balcony, is it?” Jen said as I started the gas fireplace. “It’s more like a room that’s open on two sides.”
“Yeah, it is pretty nice,” I agreed, sitting down on the couch and kicking my legs up.
“This whole place is pretty nice,” Jen said, indicating the apartment.
“Yeah, it’s O.K. I mean, yeah, it’s really nice and all, but I just can’t see living here forever. This is just until we find a place to buy,” I said.
“I could be happy living here,” Jen said, taking a sip of her boulevardier. “This is nice.”
“I’m not saying it’s not nice- and for twenty-five grand a month it had better be- it’s just that it isn’t what we need right now,” I said.
“How much?” Jen asked, sitting up, her eyes wide.
“Yeah, that’s right. Three month’s rent here buys a pretty nice Mercedes,” I said, shaking my head.
“Holy fuck,” Jen breathed. “How much would it cost to buy?”
“Don’t know. Didn’t ask. Ten, maybe twelve? I have no idea, really.”
“Fuck,” Jen said. “You guys really are in a different tax bracket.”
"The house Emmy lived in when I met her was something like twenty thousand square feet, and she told me that it was much smaller than their place in Paris. Oh, and their castle in Southern France. Which apparently has twelfth-century tapestries and stuff like that, because it’s been in the family for that long,” I said.
“Are you fu- you’re joking, right?” Jen asked, leaning forward.
“No, seriously, her family has owned that castle since eleven hundred A.D. or something like that, and their Paris mansion since sixteen-something,” I said.
Jen just stared at me for a few seconds, trying to process.
“How… I mean, like, fuck. How is that even possible? How many wars, revolutions, whatever have they been through, and still kept their shit from getting taken?” Jen asked, pondering.
“To be honest,” I said, “I suspect it was Emmy’s ancestors that did a lot of taking during those wars and revolutions.”
“Yeah, I guess that’s how it works, right? The families that manage to take advantage stay on top of history,” Jen said, thinking about it. “And here I thought it was a big deal that one of my ancestors signed the Declaration Of Independence.”
“Hey- as far as America is concerned, that is a big deal,” I agreed.
Jen and I had finished off our drinks, so I went inside to make us some more. “You guys O.K.?” I asked Lee and Emmy, holding up the empty glasses.
“I’d take another, Leah. Thanks!” Lee said, handing me his glass.
“I will help you,” Emmy said, taking Lee’s glass and her own into the kitchen.
I mixed up another round while Emmy leaned against my back, her arms around my waist.
“I love you, Leah,” she murmured, the vibration of her words tickling my back.
I put my hand on hers. “I love you, too, babe. Are you and Lee having a productive discussion?”
“We are, but I am afraid that there may be some bad news. He tells me that top studio time is much more expensive here. Even more than the studio we used in New York, so it will cost more to produce our next album,” Emmy said, her voice still muffled by my shirt.
“How about setting up your own studio?” I asked. “We talked about finding a house with a possible studio space, but how about if we prioritize that aspect?” I asked, turning around in her arms. “How about if we look for a space that either has a top-end studio space already, or can be built out for a full-fledged recording studio? And I don’t mean a little one like our place in Manhattan. I mean, a real, full-scale recording studio.”
“You would be O.K. with that?” Emmy asked, burying her face in my chest.
“Of course I would, baby. Why would you even doubt it?”
“It is so much to ask, Leah,” Emmy said, leaning back to look me in the eyes. “Perhaps too much.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” I said. “I’ll start looking tomorrow.”
Returning to the balcony, I found Jen leaning against the railing, looking out towards downtown.
“Look how far it is to downtown,” she said, taking the drink I offered. “It’s like fifteen miles away. If you wanted to walk there, you could, but it would take you pretty much all day. Lee and me, our place in Pasadena is just as far on the other side. So just walking from here to our place would take you something like twelve hours of non-stop walking.”
I wasn’t sure where Jen was going with this, so I just looked at downtown’s towers off in the distance and took a sip of my old fashioned.
“You know that’s what determined the original Spanish missions here in California, right?” Jen asked, sipping her boulevardier. “They built the first one in San Diego, then the next one a day’s walk north, in, um, Carlsbad or someplace.”
“Oceanside,” I corrected.
“Yeah. And then another long day’s walk north from there, in San Juan Capistrano, and so on, until finally, twenty missions later, they got to San Francisco. But you know what? There was never a mission in Los Angeles. One over in the San Gabriel Valley, by Alhambra, and another in the San Fernando Valley, up right by where the five and four-oh-five come together, but not one here in the City Of Angels.”
“When I was in fifth grade we took a field trip to the Mission San Luis Rey in Oceanside,” I said. “Other than that, I’ve never been to any of the rest.”
“I guess I was about that age when my folks thought it would be cool to see them all on a family road trip,” Jen said. “We drove all the way down to San Diego. Of course we went to the zoo and Sea World, but then the mission. And then the one in Oceanside, and the one in San Juan Capistrano, and the two here in the LA area. By that time, us kids were so fucking over it that my parents gave up and bailed on the whole thing. We wound up backtracking and did the Universal Studios tour, then went back home to San Jose. I’ve never seen any of the rest of ‘em. Funny, I saw all of them at the far end of the state, but never the missions near where I was born and raised.”
“Would you do a road trip like that now?” I asked, wondering where all this was coming from.
“Maybe, but I’d probably get three or four missions in and bag the whole thing again,” Jen said with a laugh. “I mean, sure, they’re cool, and they really are all different- at least the ones I’ve seen- but only so much history can one girl take.”
“Twenty missions would be a lot to see,” I agreed.
“Twenty-one,” Jen corrected. “There’re twenty-one of ‘em.”
“That’s even more,” I said, finally sitting down on the couch again.
“Too many,” Jen agreed.
“So you guys found a place in Pasadena? Is it nice?”
“Yeah, it’s nice, I guess. It’s a Craftsman from a hundred years ago, which is cool, but it doesn't have central A/C and gets hotter than a crack pipe, you know? It’s also way too close to Dragon Mama, if you know what I mean.”
“How much did you get it for?” I asked, just to make conversation.
“We didn’t get that great a deal, really, but Lee saw it and liked it and was burned out from home shopping. All told, it was just shy of one point six million.”
“Could you retrofit air?” I asked, thinking about the huge cost the new HVAC system was going to cost in New York.
“It has those wall units, you know the horizontal kind that go up on the wall? It has those in a few rooms, like the living room and the master bedroom, but they just aren’t enough. We’d need one in almost every room, you know?” Jen said.
“Sounds like you need to move,” I said.
“Yeah, we do, but we just bought this place, so we’re stuck with it for a while,” Jen said with a sigh.
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