[45]

“You are nothing but an assignment!”

The words burned in my ears, reverberating through my heart with an icy anger. I was tired. Mentally from the drama, and physically from having to carry a drunk Raxx home. But I could not escape those words repeating in my head, like a jeweler trying to etch them into my brain.

Elaine no longer had a hold on me, yet I still felt trapped thinking about her. As I lay in bed that night, reliving all our interactions, I could not help but feel exasperated in equal measure. The magic she used was flagrant, subverting the natural inclinations of others to bend to her desires. Where once there was turmoil and indecision from her charms, now there was just a void. My feelings for her were never real, leaving me only indignant at the idea. A losing proposition if there ever was one.

It was never a secret she manipulated me. Parting on bad terms left a bad taste, like it should have. Still, there was a sense of… relief.

Knowing what she went through gave me a modicum of sympathy. Had someone come to me in my low state, in Weston offering the same enchantments, I doubt I would have had the power to resist.

The lonely, angry girl from the visions still existed well within the lie Elaine had created for the world. That day on the arcanorail, while the other nobles socialized, I remembered Lady Highrow sitting alone by herself, quietly reading in the library. I sincerely hoped that she would grow and heal from this. If she had not been a person worthy of having the chance to do so, Vascora would have never asked me to help.

Just as much. I wanted her to suffer for spitting on the trust I offered. No, spitting is to calm a description. What she did was burn me for the weakness of caring.

I could appreciate the irony, though. Sibilla had meant to do me a disservice, embarrassing the two of us in front of the assembled peerage, but she had really done me a favor. Elaine was no longer interested in pursuing our courtship cover, which left me out of the RRS’s designs. The Ankest nobility would try to spread rumors about Elaine, even though only a few of them saw her bereft of magic. However, I doubted very much that would hurt Elaine. Ergentein nobility would rally against Ankest for the soon to be war. They would not care one whit for what the orange-headed bastards thought.

I wanted to let all of it go, but there was one thing, besides the enmity, that kept nagging at me. A small voice that whispered there was a connection just beyond my grasp. Again, I thought back to all my conversations with Elaine. I wished I had written them down for my Presence training—wait, that is it!

Summoning my soul ledger, I recounted the events that led me to ascension in my personal journal. Working my way through the entire week was a mountainous task, I soon realized. Having started too late, I endeavored to only describe what I felt were the most important events.

It was difficult at first, trying to remember all the emotions I felt. So, I worked on describing what happened bit by bit. Over time, the minor details expanded into things I had consciously forgotten, and recalling my feelings became easier. A more complete picture of my motivations presented itself. My desire to rush into a marriage with Angelina, born from a desperate need for security and acceptance. Elaine’s casual manipulations were all intentional by circumstance of her wearing magic items. There would never be a point in debating that again.

The more recent events of the evening were easiest. Tiredness caught up to me before long, but I continued to push out what was on my mind, knowing that to let things fester would make it harder for me to sleep.

It was strangely cathartic to jot down all my anxieties, but I suppose that was the purpose. A sense of calm replaced my fragmented thoughts, allowing me to move on with the moment to moment of life.

Satisfied, I closed my eyes, and reached out to pet Ugz good night. For such a temperamental rascal, it always surprised me how much he wanted snuggle time.

Darkness took me, and I was almost asleep until a fragment of a memory of Vascora’s vision made its way to my mind. Elaine hid in the corner of a dark hallway, listening to a cruel conversation that would change her life. In my mind’s eye, the three girls that were supposed to be her friends laughed at her ugliness. And I recognized one girl: the silent one of the three, grinning with menace. The bothersome detail I had been seeking found its way to my attention.

Florence.

It was she that put the other two girls up to mocking young Elaine. The very same Florence that pulled me into that fiasco with Angelina. Florence, who just a day before I caught with one of the Churm twins.

How someone knew Elaine’s secret continued to bother me. I knew from my vision that Elaine was practically a shut in for many years. Only someone who knew her well as a child might have suspected that her looks were not natural. The enchantments were too powerful, and organic to raise suspicion. Florence was the best suspect I had.

What could be her motive for doing that to Elaine? What would Marvaya gain?

I knew little of Marvaya, but from what I knew, she cared about bringing love and honor into the hearth. Marvaya, like Vascora, had always struck me as one of the more benevolent of the gods. It was her priests that officiated marital unions and counseled those whose marriages were in trouble of failing.

Had Florence wanted to stop another unfortunate marriage? The crown prince of Ankest and Sibilla had already married, so the only pairing tonight’s events could have ruined were mine.

But more important than the reason why was that her methods were detestable. Suspect, even. I had never gotten over what she had done to Angelina. Because of it, I now felt sure that she was the one that tried to ruin Elaine. Again.

Then, there was the fact that she always triggered my ability…

No more.

Tomorrow, I would begin researching Florence, and if I found her to be a snake in our midst, I would crush her with all the gods given power I had.

…

+3 Presence

+1 Intelligence

Spell Reward: Magesilk Attire (Rank 1): For 4 hours protective clothing will cover your body. Protection increases with rank.

The notifications filled me with needed glee.

I suspected the high bonus I had to Presence was only in part because of my recording efforts the night before. Likely, dealing with Elaine’s hold over my emotions had made the attribute higher, too. My storm of feelings had somewhat abated, and in the aftermath, I felt more rooted than before.

Intelligence was an odd one to have improved, but if I had to guess, it was because of my continued research into lore. Monster lore continued to be my primary area of fascination, yet with reluctance I had recently diverted my efforts from it toward my two class skills. Perhaps branching out makes it easier to train Intelligence. I would have to investigate it later.

The bonuses were nice, but it was the spell that truly delighted me. Unknown to me, Vascora had a sense of humor. Though being a goddess of misfortune, I am guessing humor helps. A garment traded for a garment was a fitting reward to my mind.

I leaped from bed, casting the new spell before my feet even touched the ground. Shimmering black cloth wove around my hands, spreading out to cover every area of my body, save my neck and head. The material felt heavier than I expected, unlike the name would have me believe. Adapting to my movements, the clothing never felt too tight, stretching instead of restricting. It was truly a sensation.

Its protectiveness was the next thing I tested. I pulled my dagger from under my pillow and began slicing into a sleeve. The material did not give way immediately, resisting the cuts more than cloth, but less than leather. After each tear, the material would quickly repair itself. Self-repairing magic armor was invaluable. Ranking the spell up became a new priority for me. I would bet at rank 5, basic Gozmyr undead could not hurt me at all. Maybe even earlier than that.

Experimenting done, I focused my efforts on the day ahead.

Seventhday was here, and it was my first free day. Well, a day free from classes would be more appropriate. In order to pay Raxx back, I planned to venture to the market and sell a bunch of loot he wanted to turn into contribution points.

For my part, I wanted to go there, anyway. I needed to have another letter sent to my father. With a war coming, I wanted to convince him to join me in Ashmere. Picking up and moving would be catastrophic for his business, as most of the wealth in the family trade was contracts that dealers would not honor upon his breaking certain conditions. It would be a hard sell, but if there was even a chance to get him out of danger, it would be worth it. Working with Raxx would allow me to better survey the markets and write a more enticing argument.

Afterward, Joy expected me to come by for a catch-up herbalism lesson. I told her I would help her with her garden upkeep in exchange for bringing me up to speed. She also had a home alchemy lab that I hoped to mess around with. Alchemy products were a great way to get contribution points. The only recipe I knew was the common skin irritation salve, and that would not cut it.

Izzy waited for me in the living room like usual, but I could tell something was different.

“We need to talk,” she said, sipping a cup of tea from her favorite chair.

“All right,” I said, sitting across from her.

“Administrator Marwin is pulling me off you. It’s been a week, and nothing has happened.” Izzy said.

“Besides last night, you mean?” I asked, surprising myself that I was not afraid.

“Last night, was kingdom politics. Ashmere is neutral, you know that. Besides, they directed it at Elaine, not you.” Izzy countered.

“What about the demon cultist? Any news on that, or will we all pretend it never happened?”

Izzy gave me a stern look for a moment before softening her gaze. “I’ve been here to watch you as much as protect you. You do realize that?”

By the stunned look on my face, it was obvious I did not.

“Hear me out. A rank two fights off a demon with no training. Then, you set up a meeting with a high-ranking noble and an assassin shows up. You have to understand how that looks to us.” Izzy said.

“But I passed all of Marwin’s tests and spells!” I said, nearly jumping out of my chair in outrage.

“I know you know those can be beat.” Izzy sighed. “Look, I put the good word in for you, okay? If you are an agent of Ruin, you are by far one of the most emotional and weak ones that has ever existed. Your attempts would have to be so path—”

“Okay! I get it, I get it.” I said, holding my palms up for her to stop.

“Anyway. You can stay at the safe house until the tournament dignitaries arrive in six months. After that, it’s back to your old house, got it?” Izzy said.

I nodded.

“I like you Harald. If you find yourself caught up in more nonsense, don’t be a stranger, all right?” Izzy said, standing with her arms open.

We gave each other a hug, and just like that, Izzy walked out the door.