[27]

Despite the increasing heat of spring, there was a chilling quality to the night air. Leaving the Ministerium left me feeling vulnerable, as if walking onto campus was entering the Ruinlands.

Marwin and Rohan led me only a short distance to meet my new guardian. Standing near a street vendor was a large stoneblood dwarf in a white guard's robe. Her skin was light grey, and her body was hairless like all of her race. From my perspective as a human male, the only identifiers that she was a member of the fairer sex were two slight bumps on her muscular chest, and less blocky, more refined facial features that I dare not claim were more feminine as I understand the word. She had four skewers of meat poking from within each of the fingers of her left hand, and was eating a fifth with the other free hand, stick and all. Grease spilled down her chin and hands, but she looked more unaware than unconcerned at the mess.

Marwin coughed politely to draw her attention.

“I see you, you—crunch, crunch—bastard.” the Dwarf said, all greasy glares. “I haven’t—crunch, crunch—eaten all day, not—crunch—gonna stop neither.”

Marwin, Master Rohan, and I waited patiently for her to finish her food; which, admittedly, was a prodigiously short time. During the intervening time, I had a better chance to look her over. And I had to say she looked formidable. Under her robe was a leather cuirass that probably took two whole cows to make from its size and thickness. Three hammers, each progressively bigger than the last, hung from a belt on her waist and a shield adorned the arm she fed herself kebabs with.

Marwin turned to me, giving either an apologetic or reassuring smile, I was not sure, and said, “Our guards often work long hours on special assignments. It helps them build up their own attributes and skills.”

The dwarf snorted, cleaning herself off methodically with a handkerchief, but did not directly contradict Marwin.

“Harald, I give you Iza-Cen-Boleman, your new protector. She is one of our best,” Marwin said, extending a hand theatrically.

“Iza… Cen-Boleman?” I gulped. That was the name of the sadist instructor. My mind rushed for an excuse. Maybe Cen-Boleman was a common dwarf name, like the human version of Smith?

“Just call me Izzy, or Isabelle. You humans are too lazy to learn how to sound out my name correctly, and it just pisses me off.” she said, shaking my hand with a rough grip.

Master Rohan dashed my hopes. He said, “Izzy, here is the wife of your physical fitness instructor. Do as she says, or you might find yourself doing extra work in that class.”

I suddenly felt weak at the knees. “No,” I whispered. I’ll do anything you say please not that, I thought, giving her an imploring look.

“Hah! My heart already broke ya, I can tell,” Izzy laughed. “That’s good, it means you and I will get along.”

Introductions over, Marwin and Master Rohan excused themselves, and Izzy led me back to my new residence without another word.

Along the way, I marveled at her cat-like awareness, looking at every shadow, building, or person on the street in what had to be an exhausting level of vigilance.

To my surprise, there was a man leaning against the wall of my new place.

“You know him?” Izzy asked.

“No,” I said.

“Stand behind me,” she ordered.

“Ho there, fella. You need to find somewhere else to sit,” Izzy told the man in a friendly, but authoritative voice.

“Apologies madam,” the man said with a bow. “I am not loitering, I am waiting for Mr. Horste to return to the residence,” he gave me a meaningful look, sending my heart into rapid beating.

“What’s your business, then?” Izzy asked. I was already thankful for her presence.

“Delivery of a message,” the man said, producing a letter.

Izzy took the letter and examined it.

“Are you Mr. Horste then?” the courier said, addressing me.

I nodded. “Do I, uh, owe you anything?” I asked, hoping he would say no. Hard currency was low at the moment.

“No sir, it has all been taken care of. Enjoy.” the man said, giving me a bow before heading off into the night.

Izzy finished looking over the letter, but did not hand it to me. “Cast detect magic. I haven’t spotted a trap, but that doesn’t mean one isn’t there. Best to be sure.”

I did her one better, casting both detect magic, and detect poison. To my senses, it was just an ordinary letter. A stylized “S” sealed the document in wax. I did not recognize the symbol, but I had a good guess about where it came from.

Gently, I pried the paper out of the envelope and read its contents.

Dear Harald,

I must beg your forgiveness for leaving as I did. My father, at the behest of my sometimes servant and watcher Cornelious, gave me little choice in the matter. Having had time to reflect on my circumstance, I am afraid I must agree with their decision.

My life has been a blessed one. Few things I have wanted have been outside of my reach, and that mindset caused me to wrong you. I fear my time with you allowed me to indulge myself in a fantasy that was never possible. The time for me to do my duty to the family that has given me so much has arrived, and I must no longer resent it.

You are a beautiful person, Harald. Not just in stature, which I will confess I admire greatly, but also in soul. I know little about your upbringing. However, I know you are a considerate man that deserves someone that will be with you without condition. A thing I could never give you.

Though it breaks my heart to ask this, I beg you forget me. Forget the silly girl that, in a low moment, spun you an unobtainable lie.

I truly wish the best for you, Harald.

Sincerely,

Angelina

Dried tears smudged the hastily scrawled ink. Knowing she had been both emotional and in a hurry, did not assuage the pain that dug at me.

The sting of rejection had an ever diminishing effect on me, but this one hurt nonetheless.

Sabine’s hate helped me past the sacrifice I made on her behalf. She made me realize I desired her for my sake, without thought or consequence of what she wanted. In my darker moments, I sometimes even wondered if I did not pursue her knowing how she truly felt, seeking to dominate or humiliate her for the pain of leaving me alone in front of the village. At the time, my feelings on the matter felt honest, but now in hindsight, with the dark resolution that came from finding her, I did not know. Maybe it is easier to spare my ego by believing I am a harder person than I am, capable of cruelty and thus somehow deserving of the scorn I found.

Angelina cared. Whether she did so for a good reason is immaterial. I found the difficulty of accepting a rejection from a person who wants to be with you was significantly more unpalatable to swallow. Unlike the unclimbable mountain that is attraction, circumstance was all that had kept us from the possibility of finding happiness in one another's arms. I could climb circumstance, and we could change it. But, in the end, that devotion she held for me made it easier, and necessary to respect her wishes. If only things had been different.

“I wish you the best as well,” I said, folding the letter and placing it back in the envelope.

It had been a long day, and I needed rest.

Before entering the house, I mentally alerted Ugz that a new guest would be present. The curious newt did not care, demanding only that I give him the food I promised before leaving. Raxx was awake in the living area, reading from his soul ledger.

He was not happy to have missed another attack.

“Sajon help me, you have all the fun when I am not around!” Raxx wailed between stuffing his face alongside my familiar.

I wondered if Sajon was his patron for Ascendency. Sajon was a foreign deity known for having dominion over songs and the wind. Desert nomads to the south, and Eastern sailors held most of his faithful.

Izzy had no difficulty making herself at home. Apparently, from one assignment or another, she had had cause to sleep in this “safe-house”. She was more familiar with it than I was, leading me to a hiding spot with a secret room behind a bookshelf. Marwin did not tell everyone about its existence; but Izzy wanted me to know where it was in case she needed to stuff me in there.

Following that, she laid down some ground rules. “Rule one, you don’t leave the house without me. Rule two, unless I tell you otherwise, always let me take the lead. Rule three, and this is the most important of them all: Always do what I say, understand?” she asked.

“Shouldn’t Rule three be rule one then?” Raxx asked, snickering.

“Smart mouth, are ya?” Izzy asked.

“Uh, Raxx, hey, did you know that my new guard was the wife of Cen-Boleman?” I asked, trying to sound as innocent as possible. “Small world, right?”

Even through his fur, I swear I saw Raxx’s skin turn pale. His ears laid back in deference, and he suddenly found something interesting on the table.

After Ugz finished eating, I bid everyone good night and took my familiar to bed. Knowing what I do now about spell work, I made it a point to cast every spell I had as many times as I could before going to sleep.

It did not take long before I fell into a deep sleep, unconcerned with love, marriage, and the pain that comes from pursuing them.