《The Snake Report》Book III - Chapter 15
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Chapter 15
[Snake Report]
News just in: a Dungeon entrance can’t be closed.
Actually, on account of absolute generalizations being a scary concept, allow me to correct that statement:
This particular Dungeon entrance will not stay shut.
There.
That’s a little better.
And yes, trust me on this.
It won’t.
I've tried everything.
Everything.
One solid sheet of bedrock, fifteen slithers thick.
Twenty, even.
No, the dungeon it doesn’t give a crap how many slithers thick it is.
Don't get me wrong- It hasn’t stopped me from trying to shut it, somehow. Not quite yet, anyways. But in rough summary, there is no way to keep this thing sealed.
At least, not for very long.
Thus, midnight monster attack.
Lessons were learned.
Mistakes were made.
Hey, show me my status.
…
[Voice of Gaia]
No more of this crap.
I’m not joking.
We might not like one another, but to say I’ve had a bad couple days, would be a terrible understatement, and we both know you have a job to do.
I said: Show me my status.
… [!]
————————————————————————
[Level 1]
[TITLE: INHERITOR, GREATER ENEMY OF THE WORLD, LESSER GOD]
[BRANCH: Divine Being]
.……………………………………
[UNIQUE TRAITS]
[Extremely Toxic] [Crystalline Scales] [Omnivore] [Affinity of Flame] [Legendary]
[Greater Enemy of the World - SYSTEM Access Restricted]
.……………………………………
[STATUS]
[WANTED - Humankind] - Bounty issued for capture, or proof of execution.
[HATED - World] - _______________
[INFLICTED - MADNESS] - No longer completely sane. [Resisted]
.……………………………………
[RESISTANCES]
[Poison resistance: Rank 27] [Fire resistance: Rank 22] - Affinity* [Mana resistance: Rank 47] [Chaos resistance: Rank 11] [Steel resistance: Rank I] [Iron resistance: Rank I] [Acid resistance : Rank 11 ]
……………………………………
[Skills]
[Healing]
[Greater Passive Healing: Rank 21] [Greater Heal: Rank 13] [Lesser Miracle: Rank I] - Granted by [INHERITOR] title.
[Flame element] - Affinity
[Leviathan breath: Rank 42 ] [Fireball: Rank 11]
[Earth element]
[Earth Sculpting: Rank 58] [Lesser Sentient Golem: Rank IX] - Granted by [INHERITOR] title.
[Water element]
[Water Manipulation: Rank 26]
[Knowledge element]
[Voice of Gaia - Rank 16] - [RESTRICTED]
[Language Comprehension] - [Human Language - Northern Continent: Comprehension] [Human Language - Southern Continent: Comprehension] [Lukra Language - Comprehension] - Great Forest Dialect
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[Spirit Attendant - Rank III] - [IN USE]
[Divine element]
[Lesser Possession: Rank I] - Granted by [INHERITOR] title. [Lesser Divine Blessing: Rank I] - Granted by [INHERITOR] title. [Lesser Holy Ground: Rank II] - Granted by [INHERITOR] title. [Lesser Future Sight: Rank I] - Granted by [INHERITOR] title.[Lesser Eyes of Familiar: Rank I] - Granted by [INHERITOR] title.
[Royal Spirit of Man] - [IN USE]
[Ancient Spirit of Depth] - [IN USE]
————————————————————————
…
Good, the skills are ticking up.
Next time, throw out those roman numerals. I don’t want those in the read-out. They’re giving me a migraine.
Just use normal numbers.
I know you can hear me.
You jerk.
Sss…
That was a total disaster.
Until I come up with some sort of solution, I know what happened last night is going to happen again. I don’t have to ask [Voice of Gaia] to be keenly aware that the World hates me. [Greater Enemy of The World] and all that comes with some perks, no doubt.
[Hated] as a status…
Yeah, reading this loud and clear.
They are not happy.
As for options, though, I’m not sure what I’ve really got available.
Plugging the tunnel up was a no-go, and covering the leftovers after the fight has turned out to be an even bigger joke. Fiddling around with things has shown me I can minimize the breach, somewhat, but I can’t stop it completely.
Maybe there’s some sort of special magic I could use to seal this, but I’ve found that [Lesser Holy Ground] doesn’t appear to be doing much of anything except help the sprout grow.
The little guy is almost as tall as me, now. If I rear back up, puff out my “chest.”
Nice as that is, this was not what I was hoping for.
Besides, that comes with its own problems.
Now I’m going to need to figure out how to more efficiently get water. Trying to catch molecules out of the air, as they evaporate is practically the definition of futile in this environment, and I’ve found this sprout tends to just pull water up and let it go.
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At least it’s not dead, which- on that particular note: Congratulations are in order.
Good work, Golem.
You, uh… you really took one for the team, huddling over the sprout.
I really appreciate it.
Kept calm, performed admirably.
I’ll admit, unlike you, I might have lost my temper somewhere in the middle of the mayhem. Burned a heck of a lot of stuff, so you made the right call. Though, I might have originally recommended a bit more fighting back and less huddling on the ground, I guess I did tell you to protect the plant above all else.
So, yeah.
I’m really sorry the monsters hacked off a majority of your body.
I’m also sorry I set you on fire…
At least twice.
I apologize for both of those instances.
Occupation hazards aside, you did well. Excellent first night on the job. Just… uh… lay over there for a bit, all crumbly-like.
Rest up.
I’ll get back to you.
Sss…
I will.
You know, once I figure out how to deal with this stupid Dungeon.
This stupid, rigged, dungeon...
At least it sticks with the running trend of things. The game, the system, the whole damn world- I don’t see why the Dungeon entrance would be any different. Getting this to stay shut might well be impossible.
Closing the opening can’t be done without the damn ground trying to rip back up somewhere else. Using a variety of methods, I might add. The ground has burst back open with random winding tunnels, abrupt splits, jagged tears. Never in the same place, never predictable…
I’ve been learning. Fifth attempt here, going on number six. Getting more creative with my own methods, seeing if that can make a difference or not.
And…
Sss.
That’s a bust.
Heavy, segmented, rough, gravel to fill in the tears only works until it recognizes. Then, it opens up bed rock and swallows the stuff whole. Lo and behold.
Oh, it might be mad this time.
I killed all the monsters the Dungeon must have had handy, so this time it’s just trying to make me fall into a crevasse. Like that would ever work. The hell do you think I am, huh?
Reeks of angry desperation, if you ask me.
Almost like someone really, really, really doesn’t like me.
That what this is about, [Voice of Gaia?]
Ha.
That’s definitely what this is about.
Yeah, rumble ominously. See what good that’ll do you.
Sss… maybe taunting the ground isn’t a good idea.
I’m still mad, though.
Honestly, this is irritating as all hell. Being able to resolve something, only to have it undo itself in some unpredictable manner is a real pain.
Doesn’t matter what I patch this with, it’s like a corrosive force is undoing any efforts to patch the hole.
I could sit here all day, and it would still find a way to get around me. Hell: if I did sit here keeping it constantly sealed, I bet it would probably just shuffle over a few hundred feet and then open up somewhere just out of range.
I’ll admit, putting my hopes in the [Lesser Holy Ground] spell was a bit of a let down. The Large Frog God left me with some interesting stuff, but it seems to be my mistake in hoping that this particular one might be useful.
It really wasn’t.
Does seem permanent, though.
I can “feel” the ground better, without using [Earth Sculpting] or anything, if that makes sense.
Uncertain at this time.
Getting back on topic: The Dungeon can’t be shut. Annoying as that might be, I’m aware of the problem now, and it doesn’t really change much.
I’m used to things trying to kill me.
Besides that: I already decided I’m not going anywhere. Just because the big-bad-Dungeon decided to throw some shade- if it wasn’t them, I’m sure someone else would be coming after me by now. Humans, or Mister Bolder’s buddies, or some other random horror that’s bored enough to seek me out.
So, this changes nothing.
But…
I guess it does me with a question.
How many [Lesser Sentient Golem] does it take to pacify a Dungeon?
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