《Dungeon Life》Chapter Twelve: The Office of Dungeon Affairs

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So, birds are great at finding shinies, but not so great at understanding what people are doing. According to the expedition I sent to watch elf guy, he got a lot of odd looks from people before someone else ran up to him. He wiggled and mumbled, and they eventually managed to get him unwebbed, and the two went back to one of the guild houses, which I’m now officially labeling the office of dungeon affairs.

More importantly: the maze was a success! My core is now easily the size of a grapefruit! Elf guy was worth so much mana, holy crap. I’ve got enough to do a few things, and I have a few ideas involving more public rooms.

First, I go ahead and actually set a garden in the belfry. Not a whole lot of herbalists seem to want to brave the attic boss, but with a garden up past it, maybe they’ll bring along a friend or two to be able to see what neat things the fruit bats have managed to bring in.

The other thing is I’ve decided to make my porch a library. Why would I do something weird like making my porch a library? Because with a piece of paper and a bit of webbing, it’s more of a bulletin board than a place for a bunch of books!

Come See The Maze!

Yes, the hedge maze! Can you brave the maze and exit with more than you went in with? Search for chests, herbs, and wood as you avoid Tiny and the rats that want your stuff! If he catches you, the only thing he’ll give is a very secure blanket! Come brave the maze! Located just around back!

So yeah, I’ve got basically a flier with that webbed to my door now. I’m pretty sure it doesn’t count as a quest, but it should at least get people curious and hopefully willing to check it out.

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I’ve also decided to make a more public lab in one of the more normal rooms in the house. I was thinking about the spell Aelara showed Rhonda, and figured if people started making potions in a public lab, I could crib off their notes and make better stuff in the secret lab!

I’m really tempted to try to make a forge, but that’s not happening until I expand downward. That’s probably my next big project, but making the two rooms took about everything elf guy gave me.

“The nerve of that dungeon!” shouts the elven man for the 5th time today, pacing and scowling.

“For what?” asks the elven woman who is more permanently stationed to the guild building in this town. “For defeating you? For not killing you? For taking your bag of holding? For dumping you outside the gate?” She fights to keep the unprofessional smile off her face at the memory of finding him. At first, she had feared the worst and the new local dungeon had truly gone murderous and used her associate to deliver a message.

In retrospect, she supposes it was sending a message, just not one anyone expected. It took all she had to not burst into hysterics laughing when the webbed elf started squirming and mumbling curses through the muffling web.

His snort at her snide question brings her back to the present, even if he doesn’t actually give her an answer. Though his pride as an Inspector may have been wounded, she knows it’s not yet dead, and so she lifts the scroll and quill. “Are you prepared to give your official report?”

He sighs deeply and closes his eyes, taking a moment to compose himself. “You have my field notes to attach to the report as well?” When she nods, he takes another moment to organize his thoughts before dictating his report.

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“Dungeon is not murderous, but in fact borders on actually playful at times. Unusual behavior observed by civilians was most likely from the dungeon moving its core, which it still keeps in a Secret Sanctum in an unknown location. Dungeon has been sending expeditions, so very likely has a secret war room. Dungeon has alchemical denizens, so certainly has a secret lab. Very likely has a secret library as well.

“Dungeon shows unorthodox behavior, but very little hostile behavior. It has created a labyrinth of brambles, inhabited by its strongest scion and thieving rats. Despite the power placed there, the maze is almost fully harmless, as I was defeated and simply dumped outside the Dungeon, instead of killed.

“Suggest higher-level Inspector for next inspection, as Dungeon has advanced quickly. I don’t know what its next expansion will entail, but it will certainly cause major change no matter what it does. Inspector Tarl.”

She nods as she finishes writing down his words, and gives him the scroll and quill to sign. He does so and returns them to her, and she begins to apply a wax seal as she speaks.

“So, now that I know what you think of it professionally, what do you think of it personally?”

He considers for a few moments before donning a smirk. “I think if I didn’t have another inspection soon, I’d head back now and explore just for the fun of it. It’s the strangest dungeon I’ve ever even heard of, and I want to know more. And I want a rematch against that spider Scion. It webbed me as soon as I got out of my Shadow Blade attack! I haven’t even heard of Epic monsters planning like that!”

He shakes his head as he takes a seat in the lounge area in the guild. “Fourdock is going to be a much more interesting place soon, I can feel it, thanks to that Dungeon.”

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