《Give me my lily pad back.》18. Blatant Biccy Bribery.
Advertisement
Mibbet took control back, and saw that the committee did not look happy at what had just happened. They may not be able to do a lot but they could be a tremendous pain in her hind quarters. If not properly pacified they would be passive aggressive (more than they had been so far I mean.)
So Mibbet resorted to the time honoured tactic for dealing with power trippers everywhere. Outright bribery. She fished Rosalinds memories for something suitable, eventually finding her mark, she called in a maid, and fished several coins from her pouch.
“We could be here a while” she said, “send out for 3 mixed packs of Madam Monchies finest.”
If the room could have fallen any more silent now would be the moment. Sending out for biscuits was one thing, but these weren’t just biscuits, they were Madam Monchies (which totally earned their capitalisation by the way.) These were the kind of biscuits you brought out when the in laws who disapproved of you were visiting (you know, the one who runs their finger along the top shelf to check for dust. I mean who dusts their top shelf?) There were peace offerings, then there was this.
Committees it seemed were bound by ancient rules. You could try to bribe them with coin, and they would be outraged. Favours were instantly rebuffed with disdain. But they had one fatal weakness, good biscuits, like a wild beast on a rampage you could theoretically tame them with food. You just had to stare them down first (and hope they didn’t bite you on the arse as soon as you turned your back.)
Mrs Beaton seemed to have become the primary spokeswoman at this time, others could try to speak, but they would soon be glared into submission by her if they were unwise enough to try it. Theoretically she should be waving the white flag at this time, but no Beaton ever surrendered truly (at least not in a way that could be understood as surrender.) “I suppose that we should discuss the primary reason we’re here” she ventured. (This definitely wasn’t a white flag, no no, it may be a little bit bleached out, and vaguely flag shaped, with two holes for fastening to a flag pole, oh and being waved round on the end of a stick, but a white flag? Perish the thought.)
Advertisement
*Ahem* the Colonel attempted. “Yes yes, things did get somewhat off track there for a while, must be the old injury playing up doncha know, when one gets low on energy it leaves a feller quite out of sorts. (This was in no way to be construed as him asking for a bribe, oh no no no. This was him quite rightly discussing the issue of the hazards of low energy, and old wounds, and how they could be countered quite handily should a sufficiently nourishing, and may I say even sugary, starched baked good be provided without questioning it in the least.) The other Committee members of course nodded along and (purely out of concern for the poor Colonels health of course. Nothing to do with the delicious, crumbly, but not to crumbly goodness of.... where was I? Oh yes. Nothing at all to do with the possibility of good snacks I’m sure.)
Thus snacks were provided, and lo, the committee was tamed. (At least until nomination time, they become quite feral in that time period, and are known to turn on each other, remember, during election season be sure to separate your pet committee members to prevent injury.)
Mibbet pondered, Plotted, and Planned, but as a frog what the hell did she know about civil engineering. She knew how water worked (hard not to when you live in it) but structure wise she didn’t have a clue. She offered up a prayer to Wannashowa, just on the off chance that such a god had conveniently popped into existence in the duration of the meeting (With how long it had felt to drag on several universes could have popped into existence without her knowing.)
So she dredged her mind, desperately thinking thinking of all she knew about water. It was wet, it was good to swim in, fish never bothered getting out to use the toilet. (Rude buggers). Sometimes these odd fuzzy creatures badgers, no.... beavers that’s it, piled up a lot of wood and made big ponds for some reason she never understood. She knew some water ran down streams and rivers, unless something got in their way. These two little pieces of information snapped together in her head, along with the mental image of ponds, and she reached a revolutionary (at least as far as frogs go) concept. Could they farm water? Herd it into one place and trap it? She could imagine frogs for miles around gathering happily at giant ponds. So she doodled an idea.
Advertisement
“Could we do this?” She asked?
“A Reservoir?” Said Mrs Beaton with a scoff. “Princess I don’t know what you think our budget is here, but it barely keeps us in biscuits, let alone something like this.”
“Oh leave that bit to me.” Replied Mibbet with a chuckle, Rosalind was going to be screaming at her for a while if she did this, but she had some semblance of a plan. “First things first we need workers, I can sell off a few of my old dresses to help on that front.” Rosalind was indeed not happy until Mibbet pointed out that out with the old led to more space for the new. That and a flash of memory of her history lessons, which touched upon the issue of revolutions, and how a populace deficient in things they needed while royals had plenty tended to result in royals rather deficient in the head department
“but, but, MY DRESSES” Rosalind wailed, in order to comfort her Mibbet flashed up mental images of the purchase regrets , and objects they resembled (big top, beach ball, 99 red baloons that had met with a pin, a flamingo, and then mental images of things that were out of season. Rosalind thus mollified the planning began.
Advertisement
- In Serial13 Chapters
Nova
Nova is a fantasy setting adventurer novel that's inspired from the stories similar to IET's novels. The story takes place in Elementia, a young world that has garnered attention from powers unknown to the inhabitants of it. As the life of the world struggles to survive in their competition with each other, only the strong are capable of seeing all that Elementia has to offer.Follow Arthur Pyralis from his birth to adolescence to adult hood as he travels the world, meeting new people, fighting new monsters, learning new tricks, and enjoying life to the fullest.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Warnings: This novel will contain adult themes such as bed time activities, slavery, gore, and the like.
8 125 - In Serial8 Chapters
The Boss of Beginner’s Village
Accardi, the World of Chaos and Glory. A well-known virtual reality game, where players could enjoy a new life as magical beings, powerful heroes or even despicable villains. The game’s programmer, our protagonist, accepted a famous web novelist’s proposal and that’s how the story ‘The Rising of the Magic Swordsman’ was born. Counting with Accardi’s finely made world settings and the writer’s creativity on its peak, both the game and the novel became tremendously popular. But before our protagonist could enjoy this popularity or plot the writer’s murder for distorting the world of Accardi, she died. And then she reincarnated, in a place incredibly similar to her own game’s world. Well, it wasn’t. She didn’t know what god she offended, but the world she reincarnated into wasn’t her Accardi, but the novel’s. To make it even worse, she wasn’t just a mob character, but actually a future member of the protagonist’s harem. And although everything was ridiculously troublesome, there was one thing she couldn’t accept: the fact that in the novel, her precious beginner’s village would be destroyed! Since one of the game’s gold rules was ‘no death at the beginner’s village’, our protagonist takes her pride as the game’s programmer to protect the village! Along the way, several individuals join her to help her goal. But as time passes by, they realized... this lass isn’t normal, is she. So, welcome to Doveshire! Hmm? Are you a powerful master traveling around? An highly dangerous wanted criminal? This kingdom’s King? Well, it doesn’t matter! You are all welcome at our humble village! However... you know, right? No ~ troubles ~ allowed~ *everbody shivers* Expect chapters usually once a week, Saturday or Sunday.
8 191 - In Serial6 Chapters
Tales From Mirthland: Swords for Hire
Desperate for cash, a pair of married mercenaries take an easy job with a huge payday. All they need to do is escort a publisher and his manuscript to the big city. But as they get closer to their destination, their "easy" job turns deadly. What secrets is their client hiding, and is that a ninja chasing them?
8 126 - In Serial10 Chapters
What Chaos Can do
The Earth, a living breathing organism, hates Jeanie with a fierce passion But Harold, and Marsha had a plan... yesterday...
8 144 - In Serial19 Chapters
I've been having weird dreams about a ruined castle as well as a man locked in a glass cage that has beautiful piercing eyes. That glows and shine like the stars however I feel as if he is looking directly at me. There's this odd feeling in my chest that I can't explain...Disclaimer: The Sandman and it's character's does not belong to me they all belong to the amazing and talented Neil Gaiman and Sam Kieth. The pictures also used in this story does not belong to me so credits to the artists and owners.
8 174 - In Serial10 Chapters
Her Revenge
What happens when the people who you thought would die for betrayed you? A lot of things happen... Especially revenge...
8 231

