《A (Not So) Simple Fetch Quest》Chapter 99: Limpet

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I hovered somewhere below cloud level, although with all the smoke, it was getting hard to tell where the clouds actually started. They were a matching dark shade of grey, so they kinda blurred together. At least the clouds smelt better, and their colour suggested that the fires would be put out soon.

I'd stupidly thought Ortho's claims of a civil war had been an exaggeration. Yes, desperate people could do stupid things, but surely if a landed noble ordered his men to attack the damn capital in the middle of a war, wouldn't they just say no? Or at least ask why? But nope, the forces of angry nobles B, C and D had picked a fight with, well, everyone.

Why did they even have so many soldiers here with them? Why weren't they fighting at the front?

Even if they did have more men with them than were strictly necessary, it was hardly enough to overthrow the capital. Instead, they split up into pairs and concentrated on setting as much on fire as possible. It was, not to make a pun of it, a smokescreen. The angry nobles had fled, presumably to return to their own territories, while the city guard tried to apprehend the arsonists.

Meanwhile, besides discovering that I had a water breath, and could somewhat help with the fires, I was pondering philosophy. It wasn't as if those soldiers looked happy attacking their own capital. What was the difference between a slave and a well-trained soldier who followed every order without question, however much they disliked it?

As expected, it started to rain, and the smoke rising from below gradually turned to steam. Ortho had asked me not to interfere. It wasn't as if I could have done much, anyway. I didn't know how to tell which soldier belonged to which liege, nor did I see the escaping nobles. I could probably have taken out a few groups after seeing them set fires, but that would have been all.

Sighing in despair at the way all intelligent life, in every world, seemed so... broken, I dropped out of the sky back to the command post. It wasn't as if I had a watch, but I was fairly sure the six hours were up.

"That went poorly," I said, stating the obvious.

"Better than expected," said someone I hadn't seen before, a tall, muscular man in heavy armour. "There weren't, to my knowledge, any casualties."

"Our problem now is that while we accept that surrender is our only chance of survival, our lack of unity prevents us fulfilling the demanded terms," said Ortho, still at the centre of things despite his supposed lack of authority. Maybe I should have declared him king, and burnt anyone who complained? "Katie, I believe you have in your possession a small, black orb. Please hand it to the demon lord. It's time to beg for our lives."

There were no more angry nobles in the room. Those remaining looked resigned and unhappy, but agreed there was a lack of any alternative. They were the ones who took their duties seriously.

I nodded and turned around to leave, only for a loud explosion to sound in front of me. I rushed out to see smoke rising from the remains of the castle. Instantly deducing the cause, I mentally prodded my available list of respawn points, and sure enough, the capital had gone. Someone had destroyed the altar in an attempt to block my fast travel.

Well, more fool them. All they'd achieved was to give me an opportunity to level up! I rushed over, ignoring the swearing nobles who had exited the building behind me, and dropped into the ruins of the castle. Two groups were fighting there, and I had no idea which was which. Perhaps if I just hung around, one side would attack me?

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Perceive mana advanced to level 18

My mana perception skill gave me a prod, informing me of something important, and I spun around to see a mage staring straight at me. A mage weaving mana that smelt dangerous.

Soul magic resistance advanced to level 19

I blinked, wondering why I was hanging around here when I was supposed to be killing Ortho. No... That was... Dammit, a soul mage! Fortunately, not a very powerful one. I took a breath to flame him, only to snap my mouth shut when I realised I'd been about to attack an ally. No, he wasn't an ally! He was...

He was staring at me, unblinking, perspiration dripping down his face from the effort of interfering with my soul. He was weak. Someone so weak was trying to control me? Was I really going to let him?

Soul magic resistance advanced to level 20

Evolution conditions met: Soul magic resistance ranks up to soul magic nullification

There are no classes of magic more insidious than soul magic, whose effects can extend even beyond death. While users are routinely hunted down and executed in almost all civilised lands, there are always the few evil beings who escape the net. You have fallen victim to two such beings, one a vulpes sagax and one a homo sapiens, earning this upgrade from resistance to nullification. This skill offers you protection, should outside influences attempt to interfere with your soul, and alerts you should any attempt be made.

No. No, I was not. I opened my mouth again and blasted him with flame, my muddled thoughts instantly departing. Now I knew which side to attack, so I did, ending the fight in seconds.

My new nullification skill alerted me to ongoing magic affecting my soul. Not new, or from the mage I'd just killed, but one that had been present for a while. That was alarming... Alas, nullification only alerted me to its existence, and I'd need an immunity skill to tell me what it was doing. I looked around, but saw nothing. Neither did perceive mana pick anything up. But then, if it was a stronger mage than the one I'd just killed, couldn't they force me to fail to notice them?

Another alarming point; there was no side quest notification for fixing the shrine. I pulled out a mana crystal anyway, but my offering failed. There was nothing there to offer it to. Couldn't I repair shrines in this world? Or was this not a real shrine to start with? Given what I'd seen at the fortress, was it artificial?

By this point, Ortho had caught up, looking at the ruined altar.

"I assume this prevents you from using your teleportation magic?" He asked.

"Sort of. I can still teleport, but it will take an hour, rather than be instantaneous."

"Then get going. The demons have already resumed their attack. Damn those greedy, self-serving bastards."

Guessing he was talking about the nobles there, rather than the demons, I activated trigger respawn, my destination set back to demon territory. Perhaps I could still get there quicker, though.

"I've started the countdown, but remember I mentioned statues of the Goddess before? If I can find one, I can travel instantly. Do you have any clues?"

He didn't respond to me, but shouted. "Is anyone aware of any statues of the Goddess, human sized and holding this pose?"

I stifled a laugh as he pulled the pose, not looking anywhere near as divine as the real thing. Plus, he lacked the wings. I could pull it off far better. Or I used to... Now my tail would spoil the effect.

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That reminded me I had a tail, so I snuggled into it while the group of guards looked at each other and held quiet discussions.

"I think there's one in Likkenshi village," said someone, so I dropped my tail and pulled out my maps.

"Which direction?"

"North."

"Found it. I'll try there."

Ortho gave a nod, so I shot off north, keeping my eyes peeled for a village that matched the location on the map. No doubt I was about to cause a panic again. Information about my appearance may have been shared between the city guards, but the villagers wouldn't know me, and none of my armour fitted. Hopefully, I wouldn't scare them too badly.

I spotted the village from above, a tiny place with maybe fifty houses, surrounded by fields of tall wheat. There was no visible shrine, but there was a central square with children running around and a few groups of adults talking, so that would be my best option for asking. I dropped in from above.

As expected, that move resulted in much screaming and fleeing.

"I'm not going to hurt you!" I shouted, hoping to catch them before they left earshot. "I'm just looking for the statue of the Goddess!"

There was, alas, no response other than more screaming. Maybe I could go door to door and knock? Try to get my questions in before they opened it and saw my face? As I stood thinking, swishing my tail from side to side, I felt the impact as it crashed into something, followed by a tight squeeze.

"Your tail is soooo fluffy!" came an excited, high-pitched voice from behind me.

Mildly confused over this unexpected turn of events, I swung my tail in front of me, only to see a small child, probably five years old, clinging tightly to it.

"Wheee," she said happily as she was swung with it.

"Finally! Someone who understands the allure of the fluff!" I exclaimed, happy to find a fellow floof-lover, even if she was only five.

Then I shuddered a bit as she buried her face in it.

"Careful, it's new and sensitive," I complained. "I don't suppose you know where the statue of the Goddess is?"

"Nu-uh, sowwie," came a muffled voice from under my fur.

Pity. I looked around to pick a house to knock at, only to discover that the village square wasn't completely deserted. A single woman stood at a distance, obviously terrified, hands clenched and shaking, yet she was refusing to run. Was she this girl's mother?

Winning an award for bravery, she remained exactly where she was as I walked over, her presumed daughter swishing back and fore through the air behind me as she continued to decline to let go.

"This yours?" I asked, swinging my tail back to my front, the small child in utter hysterics.

"Please... Please don't hurt her. I beg you. I'll do anything, just leave her alone," the woman sobbed, increasing her mothering credentials several-fold. Not her comprehension skills, though.

"I said I wasn't going to hurt anyone," I pointed out. "Naturally, that includes this young limpet. I'm not even a demon. I just cosplay as one on Tuesdays."

I swooped my tail up and down, the little parasite enjoying every second of it, while her mum watched in disbelief. "...But it's Wednesday," she muttered under her breath. Nice little fact to know. I had no idea how they measured weeks, never mind what day it was.

"I'm looking for the Goddess' shrine," I repeated. "Do you know where it is? And how do I safely detach this... this..."

"Lucy!" came the girl's muffled voice.

"This Lucy?" I finished.

"Come on, Lucy, please let go," said the woman, with rather more pleading in her voice than the situation warranted. Guess she still didn't trust me.

"No!" she answered.

I was struggling to keep a straight face. After every predicament I'd been in, was the one I wouldn't be able to escape from a five-year-old child grabbing hold of my tail? Well, I'd need to do something about it soon, because a group of men were rushing up the street carrying pitchforks, and I wouldn't want them to break their important farming tools by doing something as stupid as trying to stab through my scales.

"Anyway, the shrine?" I repeated, at least wanting to get that bit of information before the optimists arrived.

"Follow the road east. It's on the left, about ten minutes' walk."

"Thanks," I said, spreading my wings. "Lucy, you really might want to let go now, because I'm about to fly."

"I wanna fly too!" said the little one, still not letting go.

The incoming farmers thankfully didn't rush straight into an attack, but hung back, apparently confused by me not having disembowelled and eaten anyone.

"You're too late," I commented. "Lucy caught me already, see," I said swinging my tail and co-joined laughing child around for them to see.

"Who are you, and what are you doing?" asked their leader, or at least the one in front. It wasn't as if he had a bigger hat or a pointier pitchfork.

"Katie, and I'm looking for a shrine so I can stop the war," I answered. "Or at least that was the plan. Now I'm wondering how to remove a small child who has attached herself to my tail without hurting her."

I gave it a little shake, but she continued to cling on.

"Any ideas would be appreciated," I added.

A burst of laughter made me turn back around, where Lucy's mother's fear was finally broken through by the sheer insanity of the situation.

"Come along, Lucy," she said, grabbing hold of her and trying to pull her off me. "Don't be mean to your new friend. She has things she needs to do."

"Aww," complained Lucy, finally releasing me.

"Phew," I sighed in relief. "For a moment there, I thought I was going to be stuck forever." Or at least until my next respawn, but no point in telling the poor, scared villagers I would be dead in fifty minutes.

"Seriously, who are you? Or what are you?" asked the leader, raising his pitchfork now that there wasn't a small child in the crossfire.

"I already said. Katie. And I'm human. Mostly. There's just a touch of centipede, spider, tree, dragon, weird blob things, another tree, fox-people... Anything else? Really, it's getting hard to keep track. Oh, the other dragon, obviously. How could I forget him? Possibly something about the brain damage he tends to cause."

The group of villagers stared at me like I'd gone crazy, which was, strictly speaking, true.

"Well, I must be off. Good luck with your villaging," I said, finally putting my waiting wings to use and taking off, checking myself over for stowaways while I was still low enough for a fall not to be too dangerous.

"Bye-bye, fluffy lady!" shouted Lucy, waving at me safely from ground level.

Not a bad village, that one. There was lots of screaming, but no-one attacked me, and I even made a new friend. Maybe I'd return and play with Lucy again at some point.

New respawn point activated

The statue was exactly where they said it would be, and it took me far less than five minutes to reach it. It was in good condition, not triggering a side quest, and was within a small shrine, basically a wooden box a couple of metres to a side, positioned a short way back from the road and raised up on a couple of steps. I crossed the threshold and jumped back to demon territory, eager for this to end one way or another.

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